EIGHTY FIFTH INSTALMENT
When I woke the day of Rhonda's arrival Ava was not in our room. I jumped up trying to establish where I was then it dawned on me, Darwin and this was the day my little brother needed me most.
As I made my way up the stairs I could hear voices and smelt bacon cooking. Barry had the BBQ on the veranda going and was cooking a hot breakfast for us all. Ava was sitting at the table waiting patiently for her breakfast. I gave Ava a huge and kiss and made my way out to Barry. His face said it all. Today was the day he found out everything.
Whilst at the table there was not a lot of talking we just ate our breakfast and I could see Barry was trying to prepare himself.
Rhonda was to arrive in an hour. I didn't want to ask Barry if he wanted me to come with him to pick her up as this was his day. I know I wanted to be there for him with all my heart though.
"Emily, She arrives in an hour" Barry stated.
" I know mate"
"Do you want to come with me to pick her up?" I never expected Barry to ask so of course I was going to go with him. This was his way of asking me to be with him today.
"Of course I will come with you Barry. Tina is it OK if Ava stays with you?"
"No problem" Tina replied. She looked at Ava and rubbed her hand.
"Aunty Tina and Ava can go for a swim. Would you like that Ava? We will have so much fun"
"Yesss" screeched Ava so very excited about the pool. Ava continued to talk to Tina about all the things they could do in the pool.
We finished our breakfast and I cleared the plates then headed off to get ready for Barry's big moment. I didn't know what to expect from him or Rhonda. All I knew was that I had to be there for my little brother. When I was finished dressing I went out to the car where Barry was waiting with the motor running. We travelled to the meeting point in silence. I could tell he was nervous and this was his time to think.
Whilst waiting for Rhonda to arrive I looked at Barry. I could tell there were a million questions swirling around in his head. I could only imagine what they would be, I knew though that very soon I would find out.
"You'll be fine Barry. Remember what ever happens it will happen for a reason" were the only words that were spoken on our wait. We waited for some time then Barry grabbed my hand and squeezed it. I looked out the window and there coming towards us was the same Rhonda I had known all those years ago...
Barry let go of my hand and got out of the car. I opened my door and stood beside the car. He walked slowly towards Rhonda and she towards him. Barry was dressed in a surf shirt and shorts he look comfortable. When there eyes met I saw a smile come across Rhonda's face. This smile screamed out "I love you, I missed you" I couldn't see Barry's face at this stage as he was walking away from me. When they finally came together they embraced for what felt like an eternity. Barry grabbed Rhonda's bag and they headed back towards me. As they came closer I could see Barry's face. He looked strange.. His face is hard to e plain but he was a man in love but he was also hurting. It looked like he wanted to scream out all the questions he had deep inside right there and right then and he was struggling but he didn't. I hugged Rhonda when she got to the car.
"I have missed you" I whispered in her ear as we held each other.
" I missed you too" Rhonda replied very softly and meekly. At this moment I knew she had changed. Something had happened to this beautiful woman that had broken her. I knew those eyes.. They are the eyes of the broken. Hers however had almost nothing left, they were almost empty. Just like someone who has had they soul removed. It scared me a little to be honest.
Again there was little talk on the way back to the house. When we arrived I lent between the seats
"Let me take your bag to the house Rhonda, you and Barry can go for a drive together" they turned and looked at me. Barry then looked to Rhonda for a response.
"Ok, thanks Emily" so I grabbed the bag and went to the house as they drove off. I don't know what they talked about there but I would find out soon enough.
That day Ava, Tina and I spent a lot of time in the pool as it was stinking hot. After hours of being in the pool we returned to the house and rested for the rest of the day. About an hour after our return I heard a car. I looked out the front and it was Barry and Rhonda. They walked to the house holding hands. In my heart of hearts I wished them the best but deep down I felt something else but couldn't put my finger on what that something else was.
When they came inside Ava ran straight up to Barry and grabbed his legs. Rhonda lent down and grabbed her, kissed here forehead and held her tight.
"Hello Ava, I have missed you" Rhonda said.
"Where have you been" Ava said innocently. I looked at Rhonda's eyes at this point a single tear welled. She didn't reply to Ava. I knew at this moment wherever she had been it wasn't good. It confirmed my earlier feelings. Rhonda stood up and grabbed Barry's hand again. The rest of the night was uneventful. Everyone was there for dinner and we talked a lot about everything but Rhonda's missing years. Barry had to work the next morning so we made plans to spend time with Rhonda. I took Ava off to bed and went to sleep myself. Barry and Rhonda needed time and from what I felt there was a lot of time needed..
When I woke I got Ava up. She had had a huge day swimming the day before so she slept a long time. I started to prepare another hot breakfast for us all. Not long after this Tina arrive upstairs.
"Is there something not right about Rhonda?" She asked concerned.
"Tina, I can't talk about it all I can say is that she and Barry have been through a lot and they just need time". Tina left it at that, and thank god she did as minutes later Rhonda arrived for breakfast. We all chatting about what we were going to do today. Ava was excited because again today she got to play in the pool. Ava was such a chatterbox, she talked and talked and told Rhonda everything about her swimming the day before. It was a breathe of fresh air hearing her talk so innocently, without a care in the world. It lightened the mood at the table.
Rhonda listened and smiled whilst Ava spoke but there was a dark cloud over her. I wanted to reach over and hold her. I cleared the dishes and as I did Rhonda walked over to me.
"Emily, can we have a chat if that's ok" I turned and looked at her. Her eyes were welling up.
"Of course we can" I looked over at the table.
"Ava, go and put your cozies on big girl" she headed off to get changed so quickly.
"Tina would you mind taking Ava to the pool for a while?" Tina looked at me and she knew what was happening.
"No problem at all Emily" she replied smiling and heading off herself. Ava came thumping up the stairs with her cozies on. It was so cute. She had them all twisted and not covering her backside properly. Those of you with children while know this look. It did not bother her at all. I straighten her up, gave her a hug, tapped her bottom and off she and Tina went.
I went and got changed downstairs. As I walked out to the hallway Rhonda was waiting. I walked Rhonda towards a room down stairs where we could sit and talk.
We sat down and there was silence, it was an uncomfortable silence at that. I lent over and touched Rhonda's knee.
"You know you can tell me anything" I said trying to break the ice. Rhonda looked up at me and her eyes were steely. There was that soulless look I had seen the day before but this time it was different. It was like she had a demon inside that she was trying to exorcise.
"I am going to tell you were I have been and what happened but you can't tell Barry" this was not easy to answer as I didn't know what it was she was about to tell me or that I could keep it from my brother. I did know though that if I didn't respond she would shut down.
"Ok, but you are asking a lot Rhonda. I don't like keeping things from him" I said reluctantly.
"Emily, you have to promise me this. It would kill him if he knew and I love him too much to do that. I have never told anyone what I am about to tell you. My family know some of it but not what I am about to tell you"
"Ok I promise.. But please think about telling him if I tell you he should know"
"Let's just see how you take it first" she said in a soft broken tone. I could see her breathing change for this moment. In my mind all I could think is 'what could be so bad that it would kill my brother to know'.
"I have to start from the beginning. The day I left your house to go and tell my parents that I was going to marry Barry" Rhonda paused waiting a response. I didn't want to say anything I just wanted Rhonda to feel comfortable enough to just get it all out.
"Ok"
" I got home and walked in to see my family at the table. I remember having a smile from ear to ear when I walked up as I was going to tell them and there was nothing they could say or do that could stop me. I was so in love. I didn't care that Barry was not Lebanese not that he was not Catholic. I just loved him and he loved me. Our souls were joined" Rhonda paused again and she had a smile on her face recalling their love for one another. I looked at her and smiled back.
"When I got to the table I blurted out that Barry and I were engaged and that I didn't care what they thought that I was going to do it. They turned to me and told me to sit down" I could she her face change as this was the moment at that time that she had dreaded and at the time felt she was fully prepared for. I nodded to acknowledge what she had said so far.
"As I sat down my father looked at me with nothing in his eyes"
"Rhonda, we hear what you have to say and we are ok with it" her father said to her.
"At this moment Emily, I was so relieved that he had said this that I burst into tears. I was expecting a fight. He continued after this though"
"Rhonda as the oldest child we have something for you to do before you get married. We were not expecting you to tell us you were getting married so fast. We have property in Lebanon that we need to sell and as you are the oldest child it is your duty to go to Lebanon and sell it for us" he stated.
"Emily, it was a tradition for the eldest child to take the reigns of our family matters when our parents were too old to handle them and they definitely could not have travelled that far" she looked at me and was obviously trying to gauge my response.
"Ok" is all I could manage as I didn't want to interrupt her.
"Our family conversation continued"
"Ok, I will do it but as soon as I return I am marrying Barry"
"Ok Rhonda, you must leave today. We have booked the flight for this evening" he demanded of me.
"I have to contact Barry and let him know what is happening"
"No! No one must know of this child!" He demanded of me.
"But he will worry about me. I can't just leave without telling him" I cried almost begging him to agree but he would not." Rhonda paused for a moment then continued.
"Rhonda, we will make sure he knows you are OK and will be back in due time" my Mother spoke up. Rhonda choked back tears whilst relaying this.
"Emily, I wanted to tell Barry but they would not let me communicate anything to anyone" at this point I spoke up.
"Rhonda, they did not tell Barry anything. As far as he knew you disappeared off the face of the earth" I didn't mean to upset her.
"I know that now Emily and it was going to be come obvious to me back then also" Rhonda continued.
"That afternoon I packed my bags and that evening they took me to the airport. I was so worried what Barry would think but my Mother told me she would let him know what was happening and I had faith that I would sell the property quickly and return to marry Barry in no time. As I boarded the flight I looked to my Mother and asked her to make sure Barry knew what was happening, she walked over to embrace me and confirmed that she would. This made me feel a little better" Rhonda look to me for a reaction but I had none. I just touched her leg again for her to continue.
"It was a long flight and the whole time all I could think to myself was I wish this plane would hurry up and land so I could get the deed over and done with and return to Barry.
When I finally got to Lebanon my Aunt was waiting for me. She and her sons and another man grabbed my bags and dragged me towards the vehicle. It was rushed and no one embraced or looked me in the eye. Fear welled up inside me. I hadn't seen my Aunty in many years and I didn't know her sons or this strange man. Looking out the window during our trip all I could think was this world was so completely different to where I had come from, there were distorted buildings along the way and military vehicles and men everywhere. We travelled for some time then got to a tiny little place which was my Aunts house. They grabbed my bags and the strange man just grabbed my arm leading me into the dwelling" Rhonda paused and took a deep breathe. I looked at her and could see her heart breaking in front of me. This was obviously hard for her.
"It's ok Rhonda, I am here with you" I didn't know what else to say at the time.
"When we got inside I was led by this strange man to a room where he tossed me in, shut the door and locked it from the outside behind him" again she took a deep breath.
"I got off the floor and started banging on the door to be let out. I screamed and scream in our native tongue but none came, after some time I heard the lock click and my Aunty came in with my bags"
"Rhonda, calm down" she demanded of me.
"Why have you locked me in this room" I asked her.
"Rhonda your parents sent you here so that I could assist in your marriage" Tears fell down her face as she said these words.
"I was in shock Emily, I had been tricked... And by the very family that was supposed to love and care for me. I wanted to run and I did try but my Aunty blocked my exit."
"Aunty I am engaged to marry someone in Australia. I cannot marry another. I am here to sell our property and return home ASAP"
" No! You will marry of our race. That man that brought you in here will be your husband"
"No! I will not!" I screamed at her.
" When I screamed Emily the strange man came in to the room and pushed me on the bed. My Aunt left the room and locked the door behind her. He raped me over and over again. I tried to fight but he was to strong" she cried.
"Oh my god Rhonda" I said as I jumped over towards her to hold her. Her body was shaking violently on this memory.
"You don't have to say anymore. I am here for you. This is too much for you"
"No I must continue" she said
"This first few hours in Lebanon was hell and for months I fought a battle I was not going to win. The rape continued and the more I fought the more it angered him. He started to beat me terribly" Rhonda took a deep breath.
"At times he beat me so badly that I could not walk. My will to fight was disappearing quickly.
During all this time inside this tiny dwelling was one war but outside there was another, a real war with gun shots and explosions. Everyday I was in constant terror of this man that was to be my husband whilst all I could hope was that the explosion would hit this dwelling and end it all.
Physically I gave in to this man so as to try and get out of here in one piece. My survival instinct was there inside me, faded as it may have been but it was still there. I had a lot of time to think as I couldn't go anywhere outside this dwelling without that man or my Aunty. All I could think was that I needed to get out of here. I had no idea how long I had been away as time was of no consequence.
One night after that man came to my room again I had finally had enough. I had to get out of here one way or another. I racked my brain to see how I could this and and finally I had an idea.
I woke the next morning and my Aunty came get me for breakfast. Whilst at the table I spoke with her and that man."
"Aunty I will marry him only if I can return home to advise my family" I directed to my Aunty as she was the one calling the shots.
"Rhonda, you must walk down the Aisle and proclaim your engagement and we will allow you to return to your family. He will then follow you shortly after so you can marry in Australia" my Aunty demanded.
"Emily, as we are Catholic this is what I had to do in order to break away. At this point I was starting to believe there was no god so lying in a church could do no more damage than being in this god forsaken place. I was always on edge from inside the dwelling to the war outside. I just wanted to be home and safe" it was at this point that I knew this would definitely killed Barry. He would go psycho and want to kill them all.
"So I walked down that aisle Emily, and I made the sacrifice and promised to marry this man. I was then allowed to travel home and he is to follow" with all this being said I could not believe that she had returned to her parents, the ones who sent her there.
"He's not really coming is he?" I asked
"He will be here in a month Emily. I had to come and see Barry"
"You should stay here with Barry. He will protect you"
"Emily Barry wears a uniform (military) and it scares me to see it. The war over there is terrible and the military people are abusive and frightening. I can not stay with Barry."
"Barry is neither abusive or frightening Rhonda. He loves you with all his heart and would never let anyone hurt you"
"Emily, please understand. When that man arrives he will kill me and Barry if I do not do what I have promised. The uniform Barry wears brings back demons I cannot stand to face every day" I just sat there because at this moment I knew she was leaving and Barry would have his heart broken.
"Emily, you cannot tell Barry any of this. I must tell him that I do not love him.."
"No you will break his heart"
"Listen to me Emily, better to break his heart than have him make a decision that will ruin his life. Barry loves his job and I would never! Make him chose between the job and me. I am lost Emily, I have demons that I cannot fix and Barry deserves so much more than this. I would ruin him"
This woman was giving up the love of her life so that he could have a life without her and her demons! At this point I broke down.
"Rhonda, do you know you are his soulmate? I have known this since the first time I saw you together. You are going to kill him"
Rhonda's voice changed and was almost demonic "He will have to live with it Emily. It is best for all" this is where our conversation finished she had hardened.
Barry was to return soon and Rhonda was going to break his heart. Just how badly I would soon see.
AUTHORS NOTES
Thank you for taking the time to read my story so far. Feel free to vote by clicking the ⭐️⭐️⭐️
Also if you comment I will respond.
Take care and stay Unbroken xx Emily xx