A/N:
Please play Gone by Jin[Lovelyz] when reading. The music video of that song is on the media.
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Jocelyn's P.O.V.
I nervously stepped into the house. Mother looked up at me, then she waved her hands, motioned me to go nearer.
Yoona halmoni held my hands tightly.
"Yoonhye-ah, come." She told me softly and led me to her room. What's happening?
Xiumin harabeoji was lying in the bed, with his eyes closed. Beside him, sat Suho harabeoji, and also another man there, stood beside Xiumin harabeoji.
"Harabeoji..." I held on Xiumin's harabeoji's hands and called him.
"Yoonhye-ah..." Xiumin harabeoji called softly. His voice is weak. "I'm sorry." He uttered.
"Wae...why are you apologizing...Harabeoji..." I felt tears streaming down.
"I promised you that I would like to see you with the one you really really meant to be with together...but I couldn't do it now..."
"It's not your fault harabeoji." I told him, holding his hands tighter. I don't want to lose him. I can't. He's more than just my grandfather. He's like my father, a friend that I share my secrets with.
To me, Xiumin harabeoji is everything. He taught me a lot of things when I'm young.
"Live better for harabeoji, okay?" He said, as he slowly closed his eyes.
"No no no harabeoji you can't leave!"
"Child, harabeoji is tired." I saw him smiled bitterly and told me. "Harabeoji knows, that there'll be someday, when you're going to stand on the aisle once again." He told me with a small voice, so that the others won't hear it.
"Harabeoji wants to rest already. Be happy, Yoonhye-ah." He told me, weakly.
"Honey...he's gone...I'm sorry." Yoona halmoni hugged me and said.
"Wae? Why it suddenly turn out to be like this? The last time he was alright..." I cried.
"This pabo...he got a heart disease...we tried to tell you, but he stopped us..." Suho harabeoji said.
"And today, he got a heart attack, then it suddenly become like this..." Seohyun halmoni said.
"You're the one that he wants to see the most. He was calling for you." Kai harabeoji suddenly said.
"Sir, madam, if you don't mind, please wait outside for a while." The doctor suddenly told us.
I nodded. I closed my eyes and went out to the living room, and sat down.
"I've called Myungsoo. He told me that he'll be back by here, by midnight."
"Thanks, appa." I said.
"Thats not a big problem, honey. Your harabeoji loves you a lot. He doesn't want you to worry about him so he doesn't want to let you know. It had been likely a month since he told us the news. We're sorry that we couldn't tell you."
The door of the room opened once again. The doctor came out. I quickly stood up.
"I'm sorry, Mr. Kim is gone."
Who knows that that might be the most hurtful words that I've ever hurt? The one who is the closest with me is gone.
Yoona halmoni started crying out her heart. She must be sadder than me. Though their marriage is arranged marriage, but she loves him a lot.
"I'll...I'll go and contact the funeral service." Appa uttered. There's tears in his eyes as well. Umma was holding on Yoona halmoni, crying as well.
Suho harabeoji and Seohyun halmoni stood side by side, holding on each other.
I didn't know what could I do right now. Cry? No. Xiumin harabeoji don't like seeing me cry. All I can do is only stay by his side.
"Yoonhye." Kai harabeoji called. He was standing beside me. I looked up at him. He didn't speak. He pulled me into his arms and hugged me.
"Just cry out. I know you can't hold back your tears." He caressed on my hair and told me.
I started crying. I really don't want Xiumin harabeoji to leave. But what choice do I ever got?
I curled myself into a ball while lying inside my old bed. It felt warm. Appa and umma is settling something about Xiumin harabeoji's funeral, and they told me to stay house.
Seohyun halmoni and Suho harabeoji is contacting Xiumin harabeoji's friends. Yoona halmoni is packing some of Xiumin harabeoji's things, while Kai harabeoji stayed in the living room, selling things for the funeral as well.
I heard the door knocked. I didn't bother to answer it. After a few minutes, the door opened.
"Jocelyn." I heard Myungsoo's voice. He's back here?
I sat up and faced him. He smiled bitterly at me.
"I'm sorry for the lost, jagiya." He hugged me and told me.
"You should work...isn't it?" I asked him.
"You need me here too. Isn't it?" He said.
I kept silent for a while. I though about Chen, who is probably at our house right now.
"Thanks, Myungsoo." I hugged him back and kissed him on his lips softly.
"No problem."
I felt guilty. I felt guilty for cheating on him. He treats me so nice that I couldn't stop loving him as well when I am still loving Chen.
I should not be cheating on him. I shouldn't.
"Jocelyn-ah." Yoona halmoni called. I got up from the bed and replied, "Ne?"
"Your Xiumin harabeoji...he left a letter for you." Yoona halmoni said. Her eyes are puffy, due to crying too much, I think. She's still holding on a stack of letters, and I think it's for the others.
"Annyeonghaseyo, halmoni." Myungsoo greeted. Yoona halmoni just nodded.
"Thank you, halmoni." I replied and took the letter from halmoni's hands.
"There's one for you too, Myungsoo." Yoona halmoni suddenly said.
"Thank you, halmoni." Myungsoo took the letter from halmoni and she left. I opened the envelope, and noticed that there's a line stating 'Please read alone.' up there.
"Jocelyn, harabeoji wrote read alone to you as well, is it?" Myungsoo suddenly asked.
I nodded and said, "Yes."
"Arasseo. I'll read outside, okay? You stay inside here." He told me. I nodded at him.
Though people use electronic devices to send letters nowadays, but Xiumin harabeoji always prefer to use paper. He said that it's better to use paper, because it can be kept longer, and it means more than emails.
I opened the letter and started reading the letter from Xiumin harabeoji.
To my beloved granddaughter, Jocelyn Kim Yoonhye,
Yoonhye-ah, when you are reading this letter, harabeoji is up there watching you now. Don't cry for me arasseo? You're a big kid already. People who dead can't be resurrect.
Harabeoji has so many things to tell you. But I don't know where should I start. Hmm, let's start here. You still remember what I told you, is it? One will have the memories of the previous life deep down inside him or her.
Let me explain first, Jocelyn. This is real, I always know that it is real, so harabeoji wants you to believe in it.
I think...you might've known Kevin. The young Kris. He once told me about you. Yes, me and him, knew each other. He started talking to me since the day I knew I got a heart disease. He always bring me news of you, telling me how you're doing.
I am really glad to have him as my friend. Jocelyn, I knew from Kevin that you knew about your past. I wish that you will know, the past is the past. The most important is, set the past beside, and ask yourself, do you really love Chen? Or Myungsoo?
Jocelyn, as your friend, I would like to wish you to be happy with the one you really really love. I couldn't get the chance to see you, together with Chen in real life, but I promise you, I'll be watching up there.
You know, in the past, a lot of things happened. I was shocked when that day I heard from Suho that you're...umm, okay, whatever. Though you and Chen were not really together for that whole month, but people are all clear about the feelings of the both of you. It is too obvious that you both got feelings for each other.
I know that it might be hard, if you want to be with Chen again. You still have Myungsoo beside you. And I know, it's hard for you to tell Myungsoo all of these things. You love him, and you didn't want him to get hurt.
I might told you once that if you fall for two person, choose the second one. Because if you really love the first one enough, you won't even be falling for the second one. But still, it's up to you.
People says, if you lose something, you'll regain other things. Don't think too much about losing me. I'm sure that you'll know someone new and who will mean a lot to you.
You can always talk to Suho. I've explained everything to him. He'll understand. If you ever got any problems, you can find Baekhyun, Chanyeol, or even Kris, they'll help you, and I'm sure for that.
Bye, my dear friend, granddaughter. Hope you'll be happy with the one you really really love.
Loves,
Kim Minseok (Xiumin)
Tears streamed down from my eyes. I wasn't expecting Xiumin harabeoji to know about me knowing the past.
Is it because of me...that Xiumin harabeoji passed away? I remember that Kevin once told me that if I ever let anyone know about the world in the mirror, I will lose someone that I really love. But as far as I remember, I didn't even tell anyone.
Is it just a coincidence...or there's something behind it?
"Can I come in?" I heard Myungsoo knocked the door and asked from outside.
I nodded and replied, "Sure."
The door opened and Myungsoo came in. He sat down beside me, and held my hands.
"Not going back to our house?"
"No. I want to stay here, with Xiumin harabeoji." I shook my head and told him.
He nodded and said, "Okay."
"You're going back?"
"Of course not! I'm staying here with you. Why would I even go back when my wife is suffering from the lost?" He hugged me slightly and said.
"You're tired, honey. You should sleep."
"No I don't want." I shook my head.
"Get some sleep first. I'll wake you up later." He caressed on my hair lightly and told me.
"Thanks."
"There's no need for thanking between husband and wife." He smiled and told me. "Now lay down in the bed and sleep."
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A/N:
Trying to write as fast as I can. Xiumin-ah, I really love you Mianhe Hope you guys won't hate me for this chapter. And as a reminder, please don't comment such things as 'Please Update' when I just posted a chapter. You can ask me to update as soon as possible but not asking me to update straightly.
Anyways, thanks so much for still reading :)) This story is coming to an end! And also, after this story completed, I will be continuing the story of Xiumin, which named 'Lucky'.
-Jocelyn