♡ chapter 5 - Harry ♡
John had passed the point of irritating. He was officially pissing me off. I don't know what possessed him to flirt with Louis right in front of me, but he was doing just that with zero shame. We were all sitting around the bonfire, Louis perched on the log across from me with John too close next to him. I was waiting for him to slip up and get burned the shit out of, but sadly that never happened. However, Louis looked mortified to have him in his presence.
Niall and Zayn were conversing from either side of me, but I was unaware of the topic their chit-chat was revolving around. I couldn't take my eyes off of Louis and John. The sickening scene was like a magnetic force keeping my eyes attached. I couldn't look away, no matter how much I wanted to.
An elbow nudged me in the side, causing me to glance over at Zayn out the corner of my eye. He waggled his eyebrows, nodding over in Louis' direction and clearly catching on to my uneasiness with John near him. But I just rolled my eyes at him, discretely shooting him the middle finger. I was in no mood for "teasing." I was too pissed off for that shit.
Ryan stood with a yawn, stretching his arms. "Well I'm going to hit the sack since we've got a long day tomorrow."
"I think that's a good idea for everyone," I growled through gritted teeth, John's sinister gaze meeting mine.
He was smiling.
That bastard knew exactly what the hell he was doing.
Liam seemed to grasp the pissy mood I was in, so he (bless his soul) stood and nodded towards John. "Hey, mate. Mind giving me another run down of the potions? They could come in handy tomorrow."
John shrugged, but winked at Louis as he stood. My nails were already indenting red marks into my palms from curling my fists so tight, and my teeth were on the verge of breaking from clenching my jaw so violently. But soon enough to answer my prayers, everyone filed inside, leaving Louis and I alone.
Neither of us spoke for a while, but then I noticed the night was growing thicker. I looked to Louis. "Do you want to go in before it gets any darker?"
Louis seemed confused by my soft, concerned tone as he furrowed his eyebrows. "Um, it actually feels pretty nice out with the breeze and... well, you said it yourself..." Louis paused, a small smile gracing his red lips. He met my gaze before merely shrugging, his cheeks flushing. "I have you, right?"
My eyes bulged just the slightest at his proclamation, my skin chilling with his words, my heart swelling a bit as I ran through his words again, not being able to believe them or wrap my head around the thought of him wanting me around.
No one has ever wanted me before.
But I can't let Louis know how much those simple words mean to me. I can't show him vulnerability or any sign of weaknesses, for he could use it against me. I've learned to keep feelings bottled up and tossed out the window. I can't trust him; I can't trust anyone. Not even if I wanted to. The world is too unpredictable to loan someone your full trust without gaining some type of loyalty from them. It's too risky to get too close to anyone at all, and I've learned this from rough experiences.
So as much as I hated to be harsh to him after his genuine statement, I faked a scoff and rolled my eyes. "You didn't think I meant that, do you? I was just trying to get you to shut the hell up about your phobia."
Louis' lips parted and I know I hit a sensitive spot. He pursed his lips together, clearing his throat before standing. "Right... well... goodnight," he murmured before his voice cracked, then he began walking towards the backdoor of the cabin.
"Fucking shit," I muttered as I rubbed my face, heaving both hands through my hair and letting out a breath
I didn't want to be such a prick to him, but I couldn't help it. I was raised to be independent and on my own. I'm not used to having people journey by my side, nor am I used to any human with actual feelings. Hell, I hardly even know what it's like to feel shit anymore. I've been locked up in a cell for two years, so it's not like I've had much experience. That doesn't include what I did in the past, but the past is the past for a reason and I'd like to move on from it.
But a part of me wouldn't let Louis walk away.
"Louis, wait." I stood and jogged over to him, fighting the urge to grab his wrist as he hit the first step for the door. He turned to face me, his eyes watery.
Nice fucking job, Styles. You made the boy cry.
"Louis..." I sighed, heaving a hand through my hair. "I'm sorry, okay?"
Louis shook his head. "It doesn't matter, Harry. I get it, all right? Just leave it at that."
"You get what?"
"That you don't want me around. That I'm just some pointless wandering you felt sorry for. I get that we aren't friends or anything close to it, so I shouldn't even be upset right now. I should be used to you acting like an asshole and this is only my second day knowing you," he snapped.
I shook my head, rubbing my forehead. "Louis, I'm not trying to purposely be a dick towards you."
"Well you sure act like it!" he yelled, wiping the tears that fled his eyes. "I'm sick of being mistreated by everyone, Harry. If you want me to leave, I will."
I sucked in a sharp breath, pressing my lips together. I didn't want Louis to leave, but I couldn't bring myself to admit that out loud. I couldn't admit to him that I found him downright adorable with his rambling and constant teasing. I couldn't admit to him that in just two days he's made me smile more than anyone else has. I couldn't admit anything to him, so I stood there like an idiot.
Louis bit his bottom lip, nodding once as tears trickled down his face. "All right... I'll leave tomorrow morning."
"Leave where?" I managed to challenge, but my voice was hardly audible.
"I don't fucking know, Harry. Maybe I'll find a cozy box under the highway to sleep in. But I know anywhere is better than here with you," he spat, turning around and entering the house.
Muttering profanities under my breath, I followed him inside like a lost puppy. He rounded the corner of the hallway where Max had told us we could stay. Of course we'd be sharing a room, but it's not like I could touch him anyways. I'd rather not get a third degree burn today, or ever, really.
Everyone else was already asleep, the house silent without a single noise bouncing through the walls. Louis wiped his face again before slinging one side of the covers off, ducking himself under them and pulling them up to his chin. I sighed once more, heaving a hand through my hair before quietly closing the door and sitting on the edge of the bed he wasn't occupying. I didn't know how to calm him down. I'm not a fucking comfort person; I kill to survive. I've never had to deal with people crying before, so this is just fucking weird for me.
The only thing that managed to leave my lips was a faint, pathetic, "I'm sorry."
Louis scoffed, sniffing straight afterwards as he ignored me, continuing to keep his back towards me. I knew he wasn't asleep, but he wasn't giving out any signs of being awake, either. He was just lying there, silently crying to himself.
It made me feel like shit, honestly.
"Louis, please don't be mad at me. I'm not used to being around other people, okay? I didn't mean to snap at you," I finally muttered under my breath, feeling more pathetic than ever for begging him to forgive me.
I'm Harry Styles, for God's sake; I don't beg.
But something kept making me beg for Louis
"Are you still going to leave?" I asked him quietly, still sitting up in the bed as I glanced over at his motionless body.
Finally Louis let out a sigh, but he still didn't turn to me. "I don't know."
I swallowed before mustering the courage to say, "You shouldn't."
Louis glanced over his shoulder at me, but didn't say anything else before he rolled back over, his quiet breaths turning into soft snores.
And even though Louis was sound asleep, not even a little doze overcame me. Instead, I sat awake all night, just staring at the ceiling and trying to orient the thoughts running through my head.
Marcus was a portion on my brain, but Louis was a larger one.
***
"Mosquitoes are pointless in society," Louis grumbled from behind me as he swatted the air aimlessly.
I pushed a branch out of my way. "Actually, mosquitoes represent a considerable biomass of food for wildlife, Tomlinson . They also populated this planet before humans were even thought of. About two-hundred million years ago, to be exact. So without this little pesky bastards, a lot of wildlife wouldn't be living right now."
"I didn't ask for a science lesson, Styles." Louis chuckled from behind me, the small giggle causing a smile to form on my lips. He had an irresistible laugh.
But I shook my head, trying to rid the thoughts of anything mushy or adorable. I needed to be focused while we were out here in the woods, and Louis blabbering about insects and such was somewhat helping me. When he woke up this morning, I convinced him into staying by bribing him with chocolate pancakes. I don't know why the hell I want him here so bad, but I knew I didn't want him to leave.
"You owe me a double batch of pancakes for this," Louis told me as he caught up, walking beside me instead of behind.
"All right, deal. But you've got to stop complaining if you want food," I teased.
Louis rolled his eyes. "Complaining is what I do, Styles. Without complaining, I'm not Louis."
I laughed, shaking my head. "You should find a better hobby."
"Oh, like taking care of you? Don't worry, I got that covered."
I rose an eyebrow at him. "Is that so, Tomlinson? I'll have you know that I get by just fine on my own. I don't need you to look after me."
"Oh yeah? You're about to step into a spider web." Louis smirked.
I rolled my eyes, assuming he was joking but then I felt the grossness of the web lapse my face. Grunting in disgust, I quickly brushed it off of me to find that Louis was laughing his ass off. I sent him my sternest glare.
"It's not fucking funny, Louis."
"You're right; it's hilarious." Louis laughed harder at his own joke, hunching over and slapping his knee.
Pursing my lips, I rolled my eyes again before brushing off my face once more. It was then that in the distance I could hear a faint scream. My head snapped up, my eyebrows pushing together as I listened harder; another scream.
A feminine scream.
But the only person in this group with a voice so high and feminine is Louis, and he's perfectly fine standing beside me. In fact, he's still laughing his head off.
"Stop laughing," I snapped, tuning in my ears on the distance sound.
"Come on, Harry. You have to admit that it was-"
"Shh!" I held my hand up to silence him. Louis listened, his eyebrows frowning together as he watched me.
The piercing scream rung my ears once more.
"What was that?" Louis whispered, stepping towards me.
My lips pressed together in thought, trying to process who could be screaming at such a close proximity. As mentioned before, Louis is the only one with a girly voice we have on the searching crew and he's right here. Who could this girl or boy be and why are they screaming?
Another scream was yelped, but the voice was giving out. Whoever this was, was tiring out; and fast.
Louis stared at me with wide eyes full of terror, and I fought the urge to reach for his hand. Instead I gave him a look, saying in a firm voice, "We need to go."
"Who is it?" he asked weakly as he began running with me.
The only answer I could give him was, "We're about to find out."
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