I seriously love all of Bel's books but my most favorite ones are Rewind, Post it and Happenstance. Dedication to the ever awesome BelWatson.
Please answer the question that's in the A/N at the end of the chapter :) I really need your help.
Enjoy reading ^_^
2020 A/N: I know no one cares but let me self promote a little uwu. So I'm rewriting my book The Secret Lives of Pop Stars on Webnovel and it would mean the world to me if you guys check it out. I've improved a lot from my Is He A She?! days but I could use some constructive criticism :) Thank you!
First posted: I honestly don't remember, 2015,
<unedited>
04
Maybe we're this school’s first gay couple
Rohan and I didn't talk as we stayed in our places.
The whole class was making a noise under the pretext of "talking" with hushed voices. But we were just silent. Not talking to each other and not to anyone else.
The silence between us wasn't uncomfortable yet it felt like there was vacuum engulfing me. Us.
Rohan had his head rested on his arms which were on the bench. The same position in which I first saw him.
Without my permission my eyes drifted to him. But I was shocked to death when I saw that Rohan's head was tilted in my direction and that his eyes were on me, a slight tint of curiosity colouring his shiny black eyes.
Wait. Did I just say shiny? Oh my god! His eyes weren't blank! They were shining! Glinting even.
Shut up woman. Of course, he was human and was entitled to show emotions. Don't start a victory dance just for that.
I wasn't dancing!
Pffft, I'm you. I know what's happening inside this circus brain of yours.
Would you shut up and leave me alone?
I will, once you stop behaving like an utter moron.
And by calling me a moron, you called yourself a moron.
This is the best comeback you could come up with?
Well... no. No! I can come up with mega, super duper comebacks.
Uh huh.
I used all of my strength to push that annoying voice to the very dark, colourless and lonely part of my mind. I mean, who the hell had conversations with themselves? That was insane!
I seriously need a doctor's help. I took a deep breath to calm my nerves and focussed at the matter in hand. Which was Rohan, of course.
Like a reflex action (yeah, I pay attention to biology), my eyes glanced at him, to find him still staring at me, the same curiosity filled his black eyes.
Why was he staring at me, a supposed boy like that?
Why?
Maybe, he was gay?
No, you judging idiot.
Not knowing what else to say to distract myself from my awkward yet hyperventilating state, I settled for the apology.
"Rohan?" I called but my voice sounded like a frog's croak so I cleared my throat awkwardly.
Wow Uthra. How do you even manage to do that? No one had to insult you. Your own stupid self was enough to do that.
"Mhmm?" he asked lightly and though it might very well be my imagination, he sounded warm.
Nah, of course I imagined it. Yep.
I felt Rohan's gaze on me which felt like something was stroking me.
Awkward.
With another throat clearing, I decided to talk.
"I'm sorry, Rohan, you know, for waking you like... that," I said, my head lowered till it was almost touching my chest.
Even though I felt like apologising to clear the silence and start a conversation, my voice and even I felt really apologetic. Because I knew how shrilly and loud my whistle was and no one should be startled like that, mainly the weak heart.
And Rohan seemed to be more on the weak heart side.
So much for his 'delinquent' reputation.
My eyes drifted towards him to find him looking at me, clear surprise evident in his face. No mask. There was an emotion.
"Why would you?" he asked as he slowly straightened into a sitting position.
"I don't know," I said shrugging. "Maybe it was rude? I mean, it's not like I'm your best friend or anything to do that. Just an extra baggage sharing rooms with you."
And I felt Rohan's black eyes soften.
"It's okay. If you hadn't pulled that stunt on me, I would've been late for class. Like always."
There was a half stretched shy smile playing on his lips and that spontaneously brought a huge smile on my face.
Aw, talk about cute.
Rohan's eyes carried some emotion as he looked at my answer smile. But I didn't bother with hiding it. Because... I don't know, it felt like some kind of victory that I made this guy give a shy smile while everyone portrayed him as if he never does anything. Like he waa a living robot.
Just then, the teacher came in and and started the roll call. With a very contented heart and a sense of accomplishment, I set down for the rest of the day.
*
*
*
"Well... this is a lot of notebooks to carry..." I dragged as I took in the amount of notebooks stacked in front of me.
Ryan laughed that hearty laugh of his which made me smile. Really, I was a goner when it came to warm laughs.
"First time hearing a guy say that," he said in between chuckles and my smile slowly vanished.
Stupid, stupid, stupid Uthra!
"Ha ha..." I dragged glancing at Ryan, "ha."
Ryan burst out laughing.
"Was that a laugh?" He asked, his voice high and a little strained from the laugh.
"Uh... I think ha, ha and ha is entitled as a laugh so... I guess I just laughed now," I said as I scratched my neck, with only one thought in my mind. Escape.
Ryan laughed again as he ruffled my hair. Well, ruffle was to put it lightly. It felt more like a dog pawing my hair.
"Bruv, you are freaking funny!"
"Oh really?" I muttered as I began filling my bag with the notes that the school provided me via my class president.
I was embarrassing the hell out of me and these guys say I was funny. Whatever.
"Hey Ryan?" some boy called from the entrance of our empty class, "Vice wants to see you."
"And what does he want now?" Ryan muttered sighing.
"Dunno. Go see for yourself!" the boy yelled before hurrying down the corridor.
"Well mate, see ya later," he said once again pawing my head, "busy man here."
"Man?" I asked mockingly and Ryan winked.
"Aye. Man."
With that, Ryan was out of sight in a jiffy.
I packed everything and exited the class after checking whether all the fans and lights were off.
As I walked near the gates of the school, I saw Rohan hunched in the ground, a whole lot of papers around him. The school was empty by now and so no one was there to help him pick up the papers that were scattered on the ground.
Throwing my school bag down, I started picking up the papers which where moving in all directions because of the wind.
Rohan looked at me and gave an addressing nod as we continued picking up the papers.
After about two minutes of running around the school's courtyard, to catch the papers, we had them all safely in our hands.
"Thank you very much," Rohan said, his trademark low voice on display.
Yet he sounded genuinely thankful.
I laughed as we walked out of the school, together.
"Nah, it's alright, mate" I said thumping his shoulders.
It felt very strange to thump a guy who was so much higher than me, yet it felt surprisingly nice.
Rohan didn't say anything but just gave a nod.
Not that much of a conversation... but he was responding, right?
We reached our dormitory with me carrying my school bag which weighed tons and Rohan with his light looking school bag and some slightly dirty papers tucked under his arm.
Entering the main door, some of the boys standing there, looked surprised. One guy even straightened his leaning position and dramatically took a lollipop from his mouth. And man, it felt like a cliche scene from a crappy chickflick.
As we proceeded, all the guys looked as if a mammoth just entered the dorm. They were nudging each other, whispering or simply staring at us. And let me tell you, as amusing as it looked, it still felt uncomfortable. Like, very uncomfortable.
"Um... why are they looking at us like that?" I whispered as I tiptoed trying to come even a little closer to his ear.
Rohan's face looked as hard as a statue with his locked jaws and vein popping temple from the sideways look.
"Ask them," he replied carelessly and I rolled my eyes.
Reaching our room and disappearing from their eyes felt like a great relief. If this was the look Rohan gets everyday, then I pity him. Very much.
*
*
*
"Rohan..." I called at the boy whose eyes were almost closed, our biology book spread in front of him.
I got a grunt as a reply.
It was time for dinner. Rohan and I weren't really chatty chatty in our room nor in our class. The little warmth that Rohan showed me vanished after the staring event on our way back to our room three days back. And now I was kind of worried about talking to him, even for waking him to take him to the dining hall. What if he shouts?
Gathering my courage, I called him again. But this time not even a grunt answered me.
I got annoyed. How can he sleep all the freaking time?
Huffing, I pushed my sleeves to my elbows and went near him. Looked like I had to drag him there.
I put his left hand around my shoulder and even though it still felt strange to have guys' arms around me, I kicked the uneasiness to a corner and pulled him up to his feet.
I'm a boy here. So I may psychologically start behaving like one.
"What the hell are you doing?!" a startled voice pulled me from my resolution speech.
"Trying to take you to the dining hall," I said cheerfully as I kept tucking him towards the door even though he was completely awake now.
Rohan pushed me away and corrected his shirt. His face was a screen of annoyance and seeing that I was overjoyed. Five days here, and I had seen his face depict surprise, fury, annoyance and a teeny weeny bit of warmth which, as you all knew, he didn't show to others ever. How cool is that?
1%? an annoyed voice suggested, of course he shows emotions. He is after all human, genius and as you know, humans tend to show what they feel in their heart on their face. So right now, Rohan is annoyed at you which, as any sane person would know,is NOT cool.
Just shut the heck up.
I seriously need to do something about this voice.
"And why would you do that?" Rohan asked pulling me from my internal conflict with myself.
"Because we are roomies, moron," I said flashing the best smile I could muster up at Rohan.
Either Rohan was really good at masking his emotions or nothing can ever affect him. Because that guy started walking without saying anything and a blank canvas as his face.
It sort of stung when he ignores me when I go out of my way to make him talk. But something in me had a taken a liking to this boy and the high spirited part in me which didn't like to give up on things wasn't deterred by his indifference.
So I followed him with high spirits, humming a tune.
Once we reached the dining hall, nearly the whole student body inside there turned their heads to see us. Even the guys standing in the queue.
Rohan did not glance anywhere as he made his way to the line and took a plate. And he did something very surprising.
He handed me a plate.
Yep. You heard it right.
Me.
Wow.
To say I was surprised would be the understatement of the month.
"Th-thanks," I stuttered as I took the plate from his long fingers, my hands embarrassingly shaking.
Rohan gave me a curt nod before turning to proceed.
I looked around to see all the guys seeing this with disbelief slapped across their face.
They say girls are the people who bother with staring at something this intensely and gossip amongst themselves. But this dormitory proved the accepted norm wrong.
These guys freaking gossip.
And let me tell you, that's weird. Like, super weird.
In my peripheral vision, I saw Hrithik anna and Karan anna enter.
"Sup," Hrithik anna said loudly clapping his hands. All the eyes on Rohan turned towards him.
"Did I miss anything?" he asked with that same loudness, "Did Rohan perform an act or something that you all are looking at him without batting an eyelash?"
No one answered as Hrithik anna looked from one face to another. It was funny to see how all these tall, well built guys squirmed under Hrithik anna's authoritative and strong gaze.
Finally some guy in the crowd shouted a no.
"I see..." Hrithik anna dragged as he looked around the room once again, his gaze as stern as Hitler's.
"So why do you all look at him as if he just kissed a fish?"
No one answered and Hrithik anna's face hardened.
"Stop being gossiping queens and do what you came here for, you maggots. Eat," he spat and made his way to the line and took a plate, standing behind me.
Karan anna looked utterly bored as he too joined the queue.
Hrithik anna didn't glance at me or greeted me. His eyes were fixated on the backside of Rohan's head and his face was emotionless.
I sighed internally.
Maybe all the guys here had done a master's degree in Poker face.
"Yo shortie," someone called pulling me from my thoughts.
I looked at the owner of the voice to find Karan anna looking at me, a crooked grin on his face.
"Hi," I replied as I gave him a my watery smile. A smile reserved only for this guy. "And I've said already that the name's Uthra and not Shortie."
Karan anna's grin widened.
This guy and his expressions reminded me of something... I just can't put a finger on it.
"And I've said that I like calling you Shortie," he said with a mocking drawl.
In the three days after my initial two days, he had been calling me Shortie and even though I've asked him to stop it, he wouldn't. Moron.
"Grow up, anna" I said exasperated, "Go find another person to toy with."
"But no one's as short as you."
"That's not my problem," I muttered.
By now, Rohan was almost at the head of the queue and Hrithik anna's casual look had returned. He was looking at me and Karan anna with amusement.
"You know a famous saying, eh shortie?" Karan anna asked.
"Nope," I said glaring. Shortie, shortie, yeah I was short but no, I wasn't not that short.
I extended my plate to be filled and followed Rohan who was looking for a totally free table.
Hrithik and Karan anna followed us with their own plates and I turned to hear out what Karan anna had to say.
"They say that guys like to make fun of girls they like very much," he said with his crooked grin, emphasizing.
My blood went cold and everything around me seemed to freeze. My legs went very weak and before I could balance myself, my knees buckled under me.
I waited for a thump and clatter but Rohan held me by my arm in an iron grip and Hrithik anna caught my plate before it could decorate the floor.
"Whoa shortie, you okay?" Karan anna asked and there was only concern written all over his face. Not any hint of what his words meant.
"Yeah," I said and my voice sounded breathy. I cleared my throat. "I'm alright. Just... hunger. Yes. I'm very hungry."
Rohan let my hand go but his eyes were on my face, still emotionless. Hrithik anna gave me a smile and Karan anna... well he was busy laughing at my face.
"Well I thought you fainted hearing me referring you as a girl," he said and his same seizure like laughter was on display.
Well you'd faint when you come to know that in fact I'm a girl.
"First you call me short and now a girl," I said through gritted teeth, "this isn't funny, anna."
"See?" Karan anna said, his crooked grin growing even wider. I wonder how his lips haven't teared apart by now.
"See what?" I barked as I glanced at Rohan who was walking towards an empty table at the other end of the hall.
"You call me anna," he said and I looked at him with a 'Are you kidding me' look.
But Karan anna continued. "Which boys don't actually do after a certain age. They don't really call immediate seniors 'anna'."
"And that's enough to call me names?" I asked with an exasperated sigh.
"Not names," Hrithik anna chirped in, "He called you a girl."
"Thanks brother." Karan anna grinned at him and I wanted to punch him.
"Which is an insult, if you hadn't noticed," I muttered.
I'm a girl. But a boy won't be happy to be called a girl, okay? Okay? Okay.
"Well leave that," Karan anna said but I glanced to where Rohan was sitting.
"Boyfriend will wait, shortie," he said smirking and I gave him my death glare.
"Well the point is, you are short. You call seniors 'anna', you are soft-"
"Excuse me," I interrupted angrily but he chose to ignore me.
"Your hands aren't tough at all. And mainly, you have no facial hairs."
"I shave it everyday," I said sticking my nose high up in the air.
"Which is so manly," Karan anna said sarcastically.
"Karan, think it's enough," said Hrithik anna as he pushed Karan anna to the opposite side of where Rohan was seated. Towards their usual table. "Save something for tomorrow."
Even though Karan anna looked like he wanted to stay there insulting me, he took a step back and gave me the same crooked grin.
"Later gater," he said raising an imaginary hat and turned.
I rolled my eyes as I walked towards where Rohan was seated.
Karan anna wasn't mean or anything. He just said everything light heartedly but he and his crooked grin like a pirate's was annoying as hell.
Oh wait a second.
Pirate.
Yeah!
That's the correct word to describe him. A modern day pirate, with brushed teeth and trimmed hair. Oh my holy macaroni with extra cheese! Pirate was the absolute right word to mention Karan... anna.
Argh, I can never call a senior without anna tucked behind.
"Sorry," I said as I sat across Rohan, "Karan anna held me up."
Rohan didn't glance up from his plate. But that was expected. So I started eating.
"It's okay," I suddenly heard Rohan say softly.
I raised my head so fast that it wouldn't be a surprise if it ends up sprained.
Rohan continued eating as if he hadn't said anything but I knew I heard it right. He replied.
I smiled.
Rohan glanced up and my smile widened.
"Stop looking at me like that," he whispered and even though I heard what he said, I wanted him to talk louder.
His voice was special. And I didn't want him to waste it in whispers.
"What?" I asked, "Didn't hear what ya said."
"I told you to stop looking at me like that," he said a little louder. Yet it was hushed.
"Sorry bud. Didn't catch what you said. Come again."
"I asked-" he sounded exasperated, "-to stop looking at me like that!"
He half yelled and people on a few tables around us glanced at us. Rohan looked at them and they turned away hastily.
"This okay?" he asked and I grinned widely.
"Double okay," I said flashing him a thumbs up.
I fumbled inside my right pant pocket to get hold of the few candies I always have there.
"It should be here somewhere..." I mumbled as I continued fumbling.
Rohan looked at me with a little amusement. To outer eyes, it would've looked like nothing. But from the five days I spent reading him closely, I had started picking mild emotions like these.
At last I got hold of the candy and I pulled it out with a victorious smile.
"Ta da," I said cheerfully as I showed him the chocolate which was a little squishy from staying in my pocket.
Rohan didn't make an attempt to take it from me and simply raised his left eyebrow.
"It's a prize," I explained as I took his hand and placed it on his palm.
"For..?" he asked a little louder than his usual hushed tone. Improvement.
"For talking out loud," I said grinning.
Rohan looked at me point blank.
"Seriously?"
"Seriously," I replied winking.
Rohan looked at me for a second as if he was debating what to reply, but then withdrew his hand from mine and went back to eating.
I smiled again.
Coming here was forced. I had no choice but to come here if my family has to have a dignified, comfortable life. Uncle portrayed Rohan as if he was a major delinquent and if I was being honest, the thought of befriending him wasn't really nice. But coming here, I saw he wasn't a troubled kid or a spoilt heir. He was lonely. He was awkward. And he was just a shy kid who was misunderstood by the society. I may not have known him for a long time to conclude this. But the spark in his once blank, black eyes didn't belong to someone bad.
"You sure this isn't expired?" Rohan asked me as he pointed to the candy I gave him.
"You wouldn't die even if it was," I said laughing and Rohan gave me an exasperated look before tossing the candy into his mouth like an expert.
Seeing the light, carefree look through the tiny crack in his mask of stoicism, I realised one thing.
Coming here was compulsion. But I damn sure don't regret it.
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The song is unnecessary for the chapter but I just love this song to bits. I wrote this chapter hearing it ;)
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