A D O N I S
To the world, I am a monster. And that doesn't bother me. I didn't care what anybody thought of me besides her - besides the girl I love - besides the girl I'm cursed to kill over and over again. The voices have been getting louder lately. More angry. Every time I resisted the urge they grew stronger.
It worried me. What I may be capable of.
Never in my right mind would I hurt her. But I do not have a right mind. My mind is cursed with insanity and I worry about if I cannot fight it one day.
The only person I did not want to be a monster to I am cursed to kill.
What made it worse was that I had nobody to blame. Yes, The Lord cursed me to be this way, but it was me who was my own biggest enemy. I was going to destroy everything because of myself.
That's why I returned to Hell in the middle of the night. No mind control, it was just me. I killed more demons. Nearly all of them. And I also did something that was necessary.
She seems so peaceful. I sit on the porch watching her paint. I smoke a cigarette, I take long inhales, I want to feel my lungs getting damaged. She smiles while she paints, her braid falling down her back. She deserved better than this. Better than me. I knew how she always wanted a simple life. A humane one. I doubted if I could give her that when the voices in my head are telling me to kill her right now.
"Kill her," they say. "She will destroy your life. Kill her."
I shut my eyes tightly and wait for the voices to die out. They've been lasting longer lately. I'm forced to listen to the whispers for longer than usual, but finally, they stop. I toss my cigarette onto the ground and stand up.
She looks over her shoulder at me as I walk closer to her. The sun hits her and makes her brown eyes look so light. The more time she has spent in the sun, the more freckles have appeared on her nose.
"Do you like it?" she asks me as I reach her. I look at her painting of a place in Asia we had been so long ago, where I had told her I would marry her someday for the first time.
"I kept my word," I say. "And I will again. We will be married again someday, Valeria, I promise you that."
"If I say yes," she says with a fake attitude, but it drops once I press my lips on hers.
My lips move with her soft ones as we kiss in the meadow. My hand is on her hip, but I move it up, her skin feels so soft. My hand only stops once it reaches her neck, I wrap my hand around it softly while kissing her.
"Adonis, that's a bit tight," Valeria laughs while stopping the kiss for a moment and putting her hand around my wrist.
But I do not hear her. My grip turns tighter as I look down at her. I black out - I can't control what I'm doing - her eyes widen as my grip gets even tighter and she tries to pull at my wrist with her hands.
"Adonis, Adonis stop," she struggles to say. "You're hurting me."
But I don't control my actions. I keep squeezing. It causes her more and more pain as she tries to get my hand off her throat.
But then I blink. I blink and my consciousness is back, I realize what I'm doing, and I remove my hand instantly. She begins rubbing the irritated area on her neck and I look down at her. I instantly tell her, "I'm sorry, Valeria, they took over for a moment."
I hurt her. Once again. That made me more of a monster than anything else I had ever done.
"It's okay, it's fine," she says. But it's not. And I know it's not. "Let's just go inside."
She didn't deserve this. She deserved better. And I don't think I could give her better.
𓆩♡𓆪
V A L E R I A
"Luella," she whispers. "Luella. Wake up."
My eyelids twitch before opening. I sit up in the dark room. Adonis is asleep beside me.
"Luella, look outside. They are close to finding you," she says.
I rolled my eyes. It couldn't be true. I get out of bed, walk into the living room, and look out the window at the forest. She says to me, "Look, they are right there, in the forest. They are going to find you and soon. You need to stop them tonight."
At first, I don't see anything. But then the second she says that I do. I see figures walking in the forest close to my house. She says, "I'd say they are about 1 day away from finding you two and killing you both. Tonight is your only chance."
Not only would they kill me, but they would also kill Adonis. I look at him in the bedroom still asleep. I knew I had to do it now.
I exit the house and bring my wings out. I fly through the night in the direction of the school. I was not unfamiliar with killing for love, I'd kill whoever it took for Adonis. Including the people I once considered friends.
I land in the front yard, my shoes digging into the grass. I look up at the large building - how could I kill them all? I couldn't beat them in a fight, but I'd have to fight the ones who returned from searching.
"Set fire to the gas pipe, Luella," she tells me. "It will burn the entire building down with them in it."
I somehow knew where it was even though I had never seen it. I walked to the side of the building where part of the gas pipe was visible. I held my hand out, I muttered a spell until a flame appeared in my hand. I stared at it for a moment.
"If you don't do this, they will kill you and Adonis," she tells me.
I set fire to the gas pipe and quickly flew backward so the flames wouldn't reach me. The second I get a few meters away, the building explodes and erupts into flames. The glass windows shatter and thick black smoke begins to cover the sky from the orange flames. The flames spread quickly, covering the entire building, fire was the only thing that could kill all species. Besides demons.
I stood in the yard watching the flames consume the building. I could hear the screams of those burning. The heat from the flames reached me, even from here, but I stood watching as the roof began to cave in and the building fell victim to the flames.
I watched until I knew there were no survivors left. I then turned around, looking at the stone path, waiting for the people who were searching the forest to return. And I'd kill them without hesitating.
The flames behind me warmed my back as I continued to stand and wait. It had been a while now, I found it strange that they had not returned. But I kept waiting. I was willing to do whatever it took to save Adonis and I. Killing my father, a God, killing thousands of supernatural creatures, I'd do it all.
But I continue to stand. And stand. And stand. And they don't return.
"Where are they?" I ask her. "They should've been back by now."
I continue to look at the path that nobody walks down on.
"Oh," she says. She then pauses. "Maybe they got lost."
No. That forest had trails that made it impossible to get lost. There was no way anybody in that forest would've gotten lost and there was no way they wouldn't have been back by now. My eyebrows pulled together as I thought - as I questioned something - as I realized something.
"There was nobody after us. Was there?" I question. "You made me see it. You made me hallucinate and convinced me that I needed to do this."
"It needed to be done. And you wouldn't have done it any other way," she says.
"You fucking bitch. Get out of my head, stop manipulating me," I snap.
"That is no way to talk to a friend, Luella," she says. "Adonis will betray you again and you'll see I'm the only person who has really been there for you."
I wanted her out of my head, but I had no way of doing it, instead, I was stuck with somebody who was able to convince me to do things I wouldn't do otherwise.
"Fuck you," I say.
"Hm. Be rude all you want, but it'll happen soon enough," she says. "He will kill you once again. And he'll do it soon."
Word Count: 1507