Jen's POV
"We are so late Harry," I started stressing when I saw the class start time approaching.
"We're almost there and we still have five minutes, these classes never run on time it's fine. If you hadn't of been wide awake watching Grey's Anatomy until all hours of the morning, you could have been up earlier," he teased me in an 'I told you so' way.
"Stop!" I warned him, earning a small snicker from him.
"We're here! I swear we're in the city more than we're actually in the suburbs. Why did we move so soon again?" He questioned.
"It was your idea..."
"Still a smart one considering we have these two living with us, could you imagine us all in that apartment together twenty four seven?" He laughed at the idea.
"Ay, pipe down Styles, you love having me around," Angus squeezed his shoulders, and followed Sam out of the car.
"Do you really think it's a good idea to have those two in the class? They're kind of, I don't know...pests," Harry pointed out, as we watched them play fight outside the building we were about to walk into.
"They'll behave, I hope. I'm just happy to see him smiling, he seems happy now. I wish your sister would wake up and realise she's making a mistake," I shook my head at her behaviour.
She handled this all wrong, I didn't understand how you could completely push away the love of your life, after you've both suffered the same loss. Her silence towards him angered me, but he seemed to have finally just accepted this is how things were now.
Their marriage seemed to just be a certificate now, nothing more than another signed legal document. It made me sad to see their love slowly fade, but I still had the small glimmer of hope she would take him back.
"I've tried talking to her about it again, she won't listen Jen. She won't even talk about him at all, I say his name she cuts me off. She won't even talk to mum about it. They'll have to see each other eventually, our baby will be part of both their lives."
We watched Sam and Angus for a few more seconds before I realised the time, and jumped out the car as fast as I could or we really would be late.
"Come on," I rushed everyone inside. The only spots left were a table in the front row, and the table behind us, so Harry and I took the front, and Sam and Angus sat behind.
The table was set up with blankets, nappies, fake babies, and other bits and pieces to use on them. I guess we were going to learn a lot of hands of things today, which was good considering I'd never changed a nappy in my life.
The class began with a small introduction video of what we would learn today, the first being the labour and how to prepare for it.
We learnt about the birth plan and how to write one up, and how to implement it during the birth of the baby. I knew Harry would need to learn that more than I would, since I would be in that much pain I couldn't even think straight.
Next we watched an actual labour video, and what happens during a natural birth. The whole thing was really comforting, and Harry's face throughout it was priceless.
His eyes were bulging, and he was squeezing my hand on impulse as we watched the husband of the woman squeezing her hand for support.
It looked horrible, and extremely painful. I was scared for this, I had a low pain tolerance as it was, I didn't know how I was going to get through this.
I heard Angus and Sam making noises behind me, annoying me and making me want to ask them to leave the class. Neither of them were going to be in the room at any point during my labour, the only person I wanted was Harry, and possibly my mum.
That was about all I had jotted down mentally for my birth plan. Harry and I would have to discuss this properly when we got home, but right now the labour was the least of our worries. Raising a child and knowing what the hell to do was going to be the biggest struggle we'd have to overcome.
We got onto the practical part of the class finally, learning how to wrap the baby to keep it warm first.
"You just wrap it like a burrito basically," Harry laughed as he wrapped up his doll tightly.
"I feel like a burrito," my stomach grumbled. Maybe I was trying to put this whole thing off, and think about anything else other than having this baby.
I was stressed out I wasn't going to be a good mum, and these simple tasks alone were seeming to be hard for me to grasp the concept of.
I couldn't wrap my baby right like Harry could, I had put the nappy on backwards, and I wasn't even holding the thing right when trying to pretend to nurse it.
I hadn't even decided if I wanted to breastfeed or use formula. Most mum's say they love breastfeeding, and how it's so good for the baby, but I didn't know how I felt about it.
Every other expectant mum around the room was well set on breastfeeding, I seemed to be the only one weighing up my options. Was that normal? Did I lack that motherly instinct already? Was I going to be a shit mum? This class wasn't helping my anxiety over the whole thing at all.
"Harry I can't do this," I looked around the room at all the happy couples, breezing through every task thrown their way.
"Yes you can, you just hold the baby like this, tilt their head back a little and position the bottle like that," he adjusted my baby as we bottle fed this doll.
"Not the feeding Harry, I mean all of it! I'm not ready to be a mum, I'm going to fail at it," I whispered to him.
"Baby, you will be the most amazing mum in the world, I know you will be," he tried to assure me.
"You don't know that," I dismissed his vote of confidence in me.
"I think it would benefit the child if you actually got the food inside their mouth," the girl running the class began to laugh at him.
"Oh shit," he laughed at himself. While talking to me he had let the bottle slip from the baby's mouth, resulting in a puddle of water on the floor.
"You've been doing well up until now, I've been watching," she fluttered her fake eyelashes at him. I didn't see her pay this much attention to any of the other males in the room, but I tried to keep my jealousy in tact.
"I was a little distracted, sorry."
"I like your accent, what is that, British?" She asked him.
What did that have to do with anything at all? I knew I had to get used to girls throwing themselves at him, I understood why he drew so much attention to himself, but it wasn't getting any easier to accept.
"Yo blondie, we need some help over here," Angus called for her attention.
"I'm just helping this couple out first and I'll get to you in a minute," she brushed him off.
"Correct me if I'm wrong, but I don't think asking where his accent is from is part of popping a kid out, or has anything to do with sucking on a tit. My missus wants to breast feed and doesn't know how it's done, so if you're done chatting him up can we grab some help?"
Usually I would laugh at what Angus had said, it was amusing, but my mind was elsewhere. I couldn't shake off the feeling that I was going to be a horrible parent, and that I definitely was not ready for the baby to come.
"You're unusually quiet, I was waiting for a repeat of what happened at the hospital, I like when you claim what's yours," Harry whispered when the teacher walked away.
"I'm not in the mood Harry, I just want to go," I put my doll down and pushed everything away from myself.
"Jen, stop being so hard on yourself. You don't think I doubt myself everyday? I know nothing about being a bloody father, i'm the youngest sibling, I never had anyone to watch over.
You're an incredible older sister to Sam, you flew across the world for her when she needed someone during the pregnancy scare, and you were there for her when her and Calum broke up.
Look what you've done for Angus, he's probably gone through the biggest struggle of his life and you have been there for him. You're the one everyone goes to when they need someone, because you're the reliable one.
Not to mention what an amazing girlfriend you are to me. You've kept my head on right for a year and a half now, I can't even imagine my life without you in it. I need you, this baby needs you, we all need you.
Stop doubting yourself, you're going to be the best mum I could possibly ask for, for my child. I'll be there to help you through everything, I promise. Come here," he pulled me into him, comforting me out of my doubtful thoughts.
"I hope so," I pressed my cheek into his chest.
"So you weren't even a little jealous she was flirting with me?" He attempted to lighten the mood back up.
"I wanted to rip her hair extensions out," I chuckled, making him let out a soft laugh at my honesty.
"That's my girl," he kissed the side of my head.
The class ended shortly after that, and we made our way back out of the building. I saw some photographers across the road, but no one else seemed to pay them any mind.
"Successful class babe, I reckon our kids going to be in great hands," Angus started joking around with Sam, rubbing circles into her stomach with his palm.
"Oh yes, best parents ever," she laughed along with him, pretending to talk down to her invisible baby bump.
"You two are idiots, seriously," I rolled my eyes at them and hopped into the car as fast as I could.
"Do you mind dropping me at my parents house? I want to see my mum," I asked Harry.
"You don't want me to stay?"
"You can if you want to, I just want to talk to her about some things with the baby."
Maybe she could give me some advice on being a first time mum. I wasn't much older than she was when she had me, I'm sure she went through all the same insecurities and doubts that I was.
"I wouldn't mind having a talk with your father, is that okay with you?"
"Yeah of course," I smiled at the fact he made an effort with my parents. Most guys ran from any kind of conversation with the in laws, but he got on really well with both my mum and dad since day one, it comforted me.
"Can you drop us off at home first?" Sam called from the back seat.
"Why...do you two need some alone time or something?" I joked, not for a second believing those two would actually be hooking up with one another. The thought alone made me shudder.
"You're an idiot Jen, I have a boyfriend and he's still married. Just because we're having a fake baby together doesn't mean we're screwing," she defended herself.
"Relax, I wasn't insinuating anything!"
"Sure you weren't...I just can't be bothered going to mum and dad', she'll just interrogate me about my relationship, and he'll lecture me on uni, I'd rather stay home and FaceTime Calum or something."
"Fine, we'll drop you home. You really should make more of an effort with them Sam, they did raise you for eighteen years. They gave you everything you wanted and needed, they still do, you shouldn't take them for granted," I gave her my own lecture.
"Okay mum," she scoffed at me.
"I'm serious Sam, they're only trying to look out for you, and make sure you're setting your future up right. You may think they're annoying now, but one day you'll understand why they constantly nagged us. They're only protecting us."
Harry gave me a side glance and smiled at what I had said, while Sam remained silent in the backseat.
"We'll be home later," I told Sam and Angus as we dropped them off at the house, handing him a key.
"So tell me again how you think you're going to be a horrible mum," Harry pulled back onto the road, bringing up my lecture with Sam earlier in the car ride.
"That doesn't prove anything."
"It bloody proved something to me. You are now looking at the world through a parents eyes, you finally understand how your parents feel, and why they did the things they did.
You probably don't realise it, but you're already talking like a mum. Like I told you before, there is absolutely no doubt in my mind you're going to be an amazing mum, you just proved that."
Maybe he was right, maybe I was just being too hard on myself for no reason. No one was expecting me to be super mum from the get go, so why did I expect that for myself?
I hoped this talk with my mum would help me deal with my pre motherhood nerves a little more though.
If Harry had faith in me, I needed to start having faith in myself.
***
So guys, who is your favourite character in the book?