CHAPTER 31 - WHAT? WHY?
I was stunned beyond words.
To be honest, I could feel more sincerity and genuineness in Lukas' oath than in Theo's vow to me on our wedding day. It was my first time hearing such a committed and serious promise and I was taken aback.
I was overwhelmed, but also deeply touched. I knew I had to say something, but I had no idea what to say or how to react to this.
Lukas must have sensed my confusion because all the seriousness of the situation was now replaced by a wide grin from him. "It's okay, Lia. You don't have to say anything."
But no, that's not what I wanted to do. I wanted to tell him how much I appreciated what he did and how much it meant to me.
"No, it's just that I didn't know how to react to this. I have never had someone do something like this to me before. Even," I hesitated to say the last bit, but I still did. "Even Theo. So, thank you, Lukas." I finally said and smiled.
He nodded and sat down in front of me. "That oath, besides being a centuries-old and traditional gesture, is also a solemn and honored promise that the Salvatores take seriously. Meaning, we can't just say it to anyone. We can only promise it to one person at a time, until our death or the person we promised it to dies."
My heart clenched in both warmth and sadness. I knew Lukas was entrusting me with something huge and important, and it made me feel honored and humbled.
But at the same time, I couldn't help but wonder if Theo believed in this tradition. Did he do it? Did he already use his? Did Theo make this sacred promise to Penelope?
The idea alone made me feel awful and sorry for myself.
I felt a pang of jealousy, a mix of emotions that I couldn't quite explain.
Is that the reason why he couldn't stay away or leave her? I couldn't help but wonder, why was he so drawn to her? Was it because of this tradition?
Or Theo just simply feel...
I didn't dare finish my sentence. I'd been through a roller coaster of emotions today to even bring myself to finish the thought. My brain couldn't handle more stress at the moment.
"Lia, are you okay?" Lukas' voice was gentle and soothing, bringing me back to reality.
"Yeah, I just have a lot in mind, I guess."
"That's understandable. You can talk to me about it or I'll leave and give you some space. Whatever you want," he offered. "I'm here for you, and I'll do whatever you need me to do." He was sincere, and I could sense it in his eyes. Lukas genuinely cared about my well-being and wanted to make sure I was okay.
I wanted to appreciate his presence--the safety and support it brings.
But when he said he'd do whatever I wanted, I got distracted. Because there was something I wanted from him. There was only one thing that came up that I desperately needed.
Something I was so damn curious to know.
"Can you tell me what you meant when you asked Theo how he was?"
I could sense that Lukas was hesitant to answer my question, so I pressed further. "I'm just trying to understand the context of the conversation. For some unknown reason, I hadn't heard anything from Theo for days, and suddenly he appeared out of nowhere when I was in danger. He even told me I didn't try to check on him. Which I have been feeling so terribly guilty about until now. Did something bad happen?"
Lukas avoided my eyes and seemed to be struggling to find the right words. He sighed heavily and shook his head. "Honestly, I wasn't sure why they kept it a secret from us, even to the Don. But more importantly, to you. Maybe Theo was trying to protect you or something. I wasn't sure. But one thing is certain, I don't think you should worry about it now."
"But I do. Not knowing makes me anxious and I can't help but worry about it more. Please. I want to know whatever that is." I pleaded.
"Didn't Selena tell you anything?"
"Selena? What does this have to do with her? I don't understand why she would be involved in this."
Lukas shrugged. "I guess she kept it a secret as well." He said as if he was surprised that Selena had kept whatever this was away from me, too.
I was getting more and more confused and anxious as the conversation went on. Right now, I just want to get to the bottom of this immediately. Thankfully, before I could even say anything, Lukas started speaking again.
"I was at the hospital this morning investigating about the organ donation mission. Then I saw Theo rushing to leave the hospital, and Selena followed behind him."
What? Despite my thoughts, I did not do or say anything to interfere with his story.
"I got curious so I asked around what happened. It turns out, three days ago, Theo was stabbed at-"
"What?" I shrieked. I stood up so quickly that the table shook, rattling the plates and cups on top of it. I could feel my heart racing in my chest and my hands trembling. Panic rushed through my veins as I heard the news about Theo. I didn't even let Lukas finish his sentence before I started asking him questions. "Where did it happen? How did it happen?"
"Calm down, Lia. You saw him awhile ago. He seems okay now, right? He had surgery and I guess that's the reason he didn't check on you like you said."
I was breathing heavily. I wasn't sure if not knowing was so much better than finding out the truth behind his silence.
This morning, I was sulking and even thinking so badly about him and his affair, not realizing that he was actually fighting for his life.
Did it ever cross your mind that my silence could mean the worst thing possible, that maybe I was no longer alive? Like I died and you didn't even know it?
But why?
Why didn't you tell me? I would have rushed to the hospital and looked after you, like how you looked after me.
"I guess the reason Theo didn't tell any of us was mainly because he didn't want you to know. Maybe he doesn't want you to worry."
Or maybe he doesn't want me there. I thought.
Here I am with my self-pity thoughts again.
Lukas stood up and touched my shoulders. He looked me in the eyes and said, "Stop overthinking, Lia. It's not healthy for you. My money is on the fact that Theo doesn't want you near the hospital because of what happened the last time you were there. Not because of whatever you were thinking."
I was so surprised that Lukas knew what was running in my head and was able to pinpoint my inner thoughts so accurately.
"You may not know this, but Theo actually blamed himself for what happened to you at the hospital. He knew that if only he hadn't forced you to get thoroughly checked, none of this would have happened."
"What?" How could he think that way? Didn't he know I was so touched of what he did? At that time, though I was pissed at him, I felt that he really cared for me, and was genuinely worried about me. It really moved me that he was so concerned about my well-being.
"I guess that's why he eventually gave in to the Don's request that you stay here." Lukas added.
I didn't know that Theo was tied up to that guilt and felt responsible for what had happened. I didn't even do or say anything to him to, at least ease his mind.
When I woke up and saw him, my mind was too quick to jump into conclusion. When he was asking me questions about the fake doctor, I focused on the someone he was with and not trusting him.
Why do I feel like I was actually the one pushing him away instead of trying to gain his affection and understanding? I was so caught up in my own assumptions, insecurities, and not paying attention to what he was actually saying.
But, can you blame me for being like this? For being extra cautious?
Knowing he couldn't and wouldn't even choose me over Penelope?
"Hey," Lukas lifted my chin up so I had to look him in the eyes. "I'll do my best to gather more information about what happened to Theo so you don't have to worry."
He stepped back and put his hand in his pocket. "But I guess you have to ask your best friend first why she was with Theo at the hospital and why she didn't tell you about it. Maybe that would be enough to know what really happened."
Lukas nodded, turned around and started walking out of the door, but I wouldn't let him leave without saying, "Thank you, Lukas. For everything and for the advice."
He looked back and smiled at me. "Stop overthinking, okay?"
After that he left and closed the door behind him.
I grabbed my phone and stared at the name of the person I was about to call. I felt my heart racing as I pressed the call. I took a deep breath and waited for them to pick up.
"Selena?"
-END OF CHAPTER 31-
A/N: What do you think is Selena's role in this? And do you think Theo is only bound by an old tradition that's why he can't get rid of Penelope? Share your thoughts!
Thank you all so so much for supporting my first ever Mafia Romance genre. It was a challenge writing this one as I'm usually the teenfic kind of girl. Anyway, let me know what you think and please please don't forget to VOTE for this story as well. Thanksss
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