KRIS POV
"By the way, beware yourselves of the forest maze."
"You'll probably get COMPLETELY lost...without someone who knows the way through that is.
"Yeah! I know the forest on the back of my head! I've never seen it before!"
"So...do you know the forest?"
"No! Absolutely flibitty jibitty no!"
"Uhh...sure, we'll follow."
After reverse following Lancer 5 times, Susie actually cared for someone in 3 years.
"Hey, losers! Wait a sec. Where's Lancer?"
"Well, he wasn't going the right way, so..."
"YOU LET HIM WANDER OFF BY HIMSELF? You KNOW he's bad at mazes, right? He's probably lost and confused right now!"
"Ho ho ho! I'm lost and confused!"
"Sorry Susie...we didn't mean to make you worry about him."
"Huh? Look, I'm not, uh, worried about him! Bad guys gotta look out for each other, is all. Anyway, get out of my way! I'm gonna find him! I know this place like...err...actually I don't know this place."
Author: Ohoho looks like a ship
Susie: "I cast Ultimate Rude Buster on Author"
Author: "Oh. Well, roll for initiativ-"
"20"
"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO"
BuTt N e weyZ
"K-kris...isn't that the machine we designed?"
"Ralsei...it's a duck. It's not going to thrash our own-"
"Kris..."
"Fluffybottoms."
"Good!"
"Alright! This'll be tough, but let's try our best-oh. That's, uh, not good, actually."
"Um, Lancer, Susie...did you at least weaponize the duck?"
"You think THAT'S BAD? Just watch what happens when it STARTS!!!"
BOOM BOOM EXPLOSION SUSIE LANCER LAUGH SOUND
"Your design sucked so we blew it up."
"Ah. I see. So...now what's your plan going to be?"
"Turns out we didn't need a plan. Just a rule."
"Anyone who get's in our way..."
"Gets crushed into dust."
"But Susie, you need us to return home. Doesn't crushing us seem a little counterproductive?"
"Nah, see, that's where you're wrong. Ya see, I KNOW I can't get back without you guys. But being a-heh- GOOD GUY REALLY isn't my style. So, I thought of a little way we can just...settle this."
Susie does her first taunt attack.
"If you can beat me, I'll go back into a good buy. But if you lose, YOU guys will have to be bad guys with us and do whatever we tell you to do."
"Ho ho ho! Our wish is your command!"
"So, whaddya say?"
"Um, Susie, I don't want my face about to-"
"Don't bother answering. We were just gonna thrash you anway, so...your choices don't matter."
TIME FOR A LANCER AND SUSIE FIGHT!
*Two bad guys blocked the way.
"So, remember when you sang to the Ponmen?"
"Yeah?"
"Did you ever notice anything?"
"I know."
*Ralsei sings a familiar melody. Susie fell asleep!
Lancer throws down spades! It...didn't do anything...
"Hey, uh, Lancer?"
"Yeah?"
"If you stop, I'll give you a picnic basket full of worms."
"Really? I love picnic baskets full of worms!"
"I just want to get along, you know?"
"Uh oh."
"What's wrong, dude?"
"I accidentally started liking the enemies!"
"Now seeing them just makes me feel round and soft. Bad atmosphere for battle, though."
"...Well, if you don't wanna fight, there's no point, I guess. Battle's over!"
"Well...that was unexpected."
"Well, you didn't BEAT US, because you, uh...kinda cheated by, uh, ganging up on Lancer, with, uh..."
"Kindness."
"But if I HAVE TO, I guess I'll go back to your side. But DON'T expect me to do anything but fight."
"Well, we're happy to have you back, Susie."
"Yeah, yeah, let's just hurry up and go home."
"...Umm...Susie? Does this mean we...aren't a team anymore?"
"H...huh? Umm, I mean, uh...of course we're still a team! You can, um...be part of The Fun Gang!"
"Wow! Me...? In the FUN GANG?! Wait a second...if I hang out with the good guys, then...can we still have monogrammed track jackets?"
"Yeah! Ralsei will make them!"
"Wait what? Uh...okay, sure! (I just wanna make Susie feel better with us, Kris!)"
Ahaha!!! Lancer joins the team!!!"
CUE THE FANFARE
Lancer joined the party!
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600 words
[insert witty jokes/the pinto bean was too lazy x 2]