**HARRYS POV**
It's been a month and just as planned, my very first single, Sign of the Times would come out today. Today should be a happy day for me, which it was, but at the same time it wasn't, because Y/n was weaker and weaker with time going by. The chemo...and the cancer was slowly destroying her body and it was painful to watch, even more painful, because I couldn't do anything to help. She was putting on a strong and brave face, but she was not okay.
We started the Dunkirk shoot early, so I was away a lot of the time during the past month. I had a two week break now before the second month would start. I hated to leave Y/n and not being with her, but I tried to come home as much as I could after shooting my scenes, no matter if it took me a two hour drive back and forth.
Right now, the single was out and I was incredibly happy about all the positive feedback from my family and friends, but especially the fans. Getting out there with my solo career was incredibly scary, but having made the first step felt really good.
I was sitting outside on out back porch, just taking in this moment of feeling somehow free and being able to do what I wanna do, experimenting with my music and everything that came with that. I looked up into the sky, feeling incredibly lucky to have the fanbase that got my back and was so supportive.
I was so lost in my thoughts, I didn't even hear the glass door behind me open until I felt a hand on my shoulder, giving it a gentle squeeze and before I could turn around, Y/n sat down next to me.
„Congratulations, popstar." She smiled. „You're officially going solo. Only good things are coming for you now." She leaned against my shoulder after linking her arm with mine and slipping her hand in mine.
„Thank you, Y/n. It's so surreal."
„I can imagine..." She said softly. „I'm so unbelievably proud of you, H. You've outdone yourself. Remember, this is just the start of something so great."
„Couldn't have done it without your support, sweetheart."
„Told you I'll always be your number one fan...meaning, I'm the very first Harry Styles fan to exist." She smiled.
„Wouldn't want it to be anyone else." I chuckled. „I love you so much, you made this day even more special."
„And here I am not even doing anything to deserve that recognition." She joked. „Love you too, sunshine. I'm so happy for you. I could burst out of pride. What am I gonna do with myself when the whole album comes out next month?"
„Probably being a proper fangirl and stream it the whole day." I smiled at her.
„Correction. The whole week, month and ye-." She stopped, thinking for a second before she corrected her sentence what hurt me deep inside. „However long it takes to make it number 1, which won't be long."
I pulled her even closer to me to just keep her close, knowing that right now, in this moment, she was here with me and she wouldn't go anywhere. „You'll stream it the whole year and longer until you get to hear my second album when it comes out and continue streaming that." I told her.
She nodded against my shoulder, not saying anything further to that. „I'm so proud of you, Haz. You deserve all the love and success in this world."
„Thank you, that means a lot." I pressed a kiss to her forehead. „I hate that I have to leave again next week.
„Hey it's alright. We managed it the last month just perfectly and we will do it just like that again."
„But you were feeling miserable and I couldn't be here." I sighed.
„You couldn't have done anything to help me anyways. I told you not to give up what you love for me, H. It's just a month. I'll be okay." She assured me and I nodded, hoping she was right.
„How are you feeling today, love?" I rubbed her back.
„I'm alright." She cracked a fake smile.
„The truth please?"
She sighed. „I am alright, just feeling a bit weak, but it's fine. I don't wanna ruin your special day."
„You're not ruining anything. Just wanna make sure you're okay." I told her. „Are you hungry? You didn't have breakfast yet."
„'M not really hungry. Thanks though." She shook her head.
„You haven't had any appetite lately. I know it's because of the chemo, but you need to eat something to at least get a bit more energy. I don't want you to collapse." I told her before I softly kissed her cheek.
„It's just really hard for me, Haz. I wanna eat, but I just...I can't." She shrugged, obvious tears in her eyes.
„I know it is, I'm sorry, love." I kissed her again. „I could mix some fruits you like together into a smoothie, would you try that?"
She nodded, wiping some tears away that escaped her eyes. „Yeah, I can try."
„Okay, I'll go mix you something then." I kissed her lips this time. „It's okay, love, no tears. Your appetite will come back soon I'm sure."
She just nodded and I helped her back up on her feet before I guided her to the living room and made her sit down while I made her a smoothie out of some fruits that would hopefully give her some more energy.
„Here you go, love." I handed her the glass and she slowly started to sip on it.
„Thank you." Y/n smiled a little. „So what have you planned for tonight? Are you gonna go out and celebrate with Mitch and the rest of the band?" She wondered.
„They asked me, but I don't think so to be honest. Don't really feel like celebrating. I'm not allowed to drink yet anyways." I told her.
„You don't feel like celebrating? On the day of the release of your first single?"
I nodded.
„H, are you kidding me?" She nudged me in the side. „You have to go out and celebrate that, Haz. You don't have to drink to celebrate, you could just have some fun."
„I don't feel like celebrating it when you're not there. It would feel wrong. I'd rather stay at home with you." I told her.
„No Harry, I won't let you stay here, sitting at home because of me. Go out with Mitch, Adam, Sarah and the rest and just have fun or whatever, but go celebrate. Don't stay here with me. You deserve to properly celebrate what you achieved."
„Y/n..."
„No, don't. Live your life, Harry. I don't want you to give up moments like this because of me. This is huge and I want you to properly celebrate. This is once in a lifetime. Go, Harry...I'd feel bad if you wouldn't go."
„Do I have a choice?" I asked her, knowing she'd stay stubborn until I agreed.
„No, you don't." She shook her head. „Go out and have some fun. You need to spend some more time with your friends anyways."
„Alright fine, I'll let them know." I breathed.
„Good. Anne, Gemma and I will have a girl's night then." She smiled before she came closer to cup my cheeks and kiss my lips. „I mean it, H. Enjoy the night and just forget about anything else. This is your moment, your achievement and I want you to enjoy it so you'll always remember it. I'm so proud of you and you should be more than proud of yourself too."
I nodded with a small smile. „I will, thank you, Y/n."
Without saying anything further, she pressed her lips on mine again.