Y/N
My alarm went off on my phone as I opened my eyes. I reached for my phone on the night stand as I turned off my alarm and sat up about to get out of the bed. I pulled the covers off of my body as Donnie arms was wrapped around my body. "Where you going?" He asked in a husky tone. "I'm going out to brunch with the girls D" I answered as he groaned holding onto me tightly. "You got an extra thirty minutes?" Donnie asked beginning to kiss my neck. "Sir we didn't even brush our teeth" I brought up as he kissed my cheek. "Give me twenty minutes" Donnie added kissing my ear making me smile. "Ten?" He asked as I laughed. "Go brush your teeth, funky breath" I joked as he pulled the covers off of himself going to brush his teeth. I then got out of the bed and followed going to brush my teeth as well.
I started brushing my teeth as Donnie was already brushing his teeth. I walked over and turned on the shower continuing to brush my teeth. Donnie just walked over and smacked my butt lightly then squeezed it some. I just smiled and spit some of the foam out of my mouth continuing to brush my teeth. Donnie soon finished and walked over to me placing his hands on my hips. I smiled and turned towards him before he picked me up causing me to take my tooth brush out of my mouth and laugh. "Adonis!" I expressed as Donnie sat me on the counter beginning to kiss my neck. I spit into the running water in the sink then rinsed my mouth out feeling Donnie rub my thighs.
"D I have to go to brunch with the girls" I reminded as he continued to rub my thighs."I want to spend time with you too" Donnie brought up as I just held onto his hand and looked at him. "What's going on baby girl?" Adonis questioned. "Last night was nice" I started off "but what?" I questioned. "It's going to take more than sex to fix this" I honestly admitted. "I know that" Adonis expressed grabbing my hands. "You just told me yesterday you wanted me to show you love, and how much I love you" he started off "baby I can't do that if you're going to push me away because you're getting scared." Adonis explained.
"I know D but it's hard" I started off "do you think we need to separate?" I asked out of curiosity. "Separate? Separate for what Y/N?!" He questioned clearly against the thought of that. "Break up to understand what we want Adonis" I stressed as he shook his head to himself taking his hands out of mine about to walk out of the bathroom. "Adonis" I called out behind him as he turned to look at me. "I'm trying to talk to you" I stressed. "I just told you how I felt last night, why the fuck would I want to break up?!" He questioned. "I just asked a question D" I simply answered. "Y/N you wouldn't be asking me no shit like that if it wasn't for a reason" he shot back.
"I just want to have a conversation with you, put whatever is going to work for the both of us in the end out there on the table" I assured. "And breaking up is one of them?!" Donnie questioned. "Yeah, it's not just us anymore we have a kid to think about and I don't want this to disrupt her" I explained as he threw his hands back. "I said what I had to say last night, I apologized" he started off. "If you don't want to fight for this no more we can move on it's whatever you want to do Y/N" he simply explained. "D it was just an option that's why I'm trying to talk to you" I argued. "You have that as an option because you don't trust me and another nigga is a back up plan for you" he said as I looked at him kind of taken back because....what?!.
"Your last nigga-" he started off as I quickly interrupted. "D I was in a domestic situation don't start your shit" I warned. "Yeah but in the midst of going through your issues who did you fuck?" He asked as I stood there lost for words. "So instead of repeating history you're going to break it off this time to go fuck someone else" he explained as I just stood there. "Is that what you really think of me?" I simply asked. "What do you want me to think or say Y/N. You want me to talk and to get my feelings out there, that's how I feel" he expressed as I just looked at him and nodded not saying a word.
"I have to meet the girls so can you get out so I can take a shower?" I asked as his face softened when he looked at me but I just shook my head and pointed to the door. He left out and closed the door behind himself as I hurried and went to go lock it beginning to cry to myself.
____________
"The silk press is gone already?" Jasmine joked as I was walking up to them with my hair in a claw clip while I had on a cream two piece sweater on.
"Adonis fucked it up didn't he?" Cassie asked as I faintly smiled. I just sat at the table as Jasmine smiled at me. "You look so pretty" she complimented. "I don't even look good" I started off "I damn sure don't feel good" I admitted. "Have you thought about you and Adonis possibly taking a trip somewhere to relax and to work on things with each other?" Cassie questioned. "Why can't we just work on things at home together?" I questioned "maybe a different environment will work" Jasmine suggested as I shook my head. "I understand he's going through something and so are you but that man loves you" Cassie said as I rolled m my eyes and looked away from her.
"What's up now?" Jasmine asked as I shook my head. "There's not going to be a wedding" I said. "So what? You two going to the courthouse?" Jasmine questioned as I shook my head. "I gave him back the ring and it's staying with him, I'm not changing my mind" I informed. "Wait" Cassie started off "I thought you two were good?" She asked. "We are, I'm just not going to marry him" I simply said looking down at the menu. I was sad because I wanted him to be my husband but I think I'm done with Adonis. I tried and at this point it's easier to walk away than deal with this BS.
"Did you ever try that thing I told you to do?" Cassie questioned. "What?" I questioned. "Writing the pros and the cons of Adonis" Cassie answered. "No because right now with the way I feel there is no pros" I admitted as Cassie sighed. "Sometimes people just aren't meant for each other and that's okay" I assured. "Yeah but if you two do leave each other alone are you still going to go back for sex?" Jasmine asked as I immediately went quiet. "If you're going to leave him alone then leave him alone" Jasmine expressed. "I mean we have a child together" I brought up. "That doesn't mean you need to be on his dick either" Jasmine answered. "Matter of a fact, if you leave and he gets a new woman how are you going to feel?" Cassie questioned as I rolled my eyes. "Is this what we're at brunch for? I thought the whole point was to get me out the house?" I questioned.
"You can't leave him alone because you love him" Jasmine simply said. "Yes I love him but I'm done" I admitted. "Then leave, you left your ex, do Adonis too" Cassie simply said.
"She can't though" Jasmine started off as I looked at her. "She loves him and she's acting like she doesn't which is fucking her up." Jasmine added. "What are you two trying to get at because you two are really starting to piss me off" I admitted as they looked at each other and smiled leaving me confused. "You so gun hold on leaving him because of how you feel right now. Sometimes you need to think about if he wasn't in your life all the good AND bad times and think is it really worth walking away " Cassie explained.
"He ain't perfect just like you're not. We might not know everything with you two and he should've never shut you out when you were trying to help him but that man really wants to be with you and have a family with you" Jasmine added. "You feeling like you look like shit and he just couldn't keep his eyes off of you" Cassie brought up. "Don't be quick to end it off of emotions, both you and his emotions are still high, his from the fight and everything going on with you and yours with his fight, your mother and the baby, not to mention depression on both ends" Jasmine explained.
"Relationships are not easy, and we're not saying look over all the bad, we're saying fix it because we know the good in him is worth so much more" Cassie said grabbing my hand. "You gave that other nigga all them chances and he was doing far worse "stop running from him, he's trying to fix it you just got to let him do it" Cassie assured me as I started thinking to myself while looking down at my menu.
Adonis
I was holding Amara bouncing her some as we were at Delphi's as I had the key to dukes gym.
He told me it was straight to come by at anytime and this was the time I felt was right to come. There was nobody here just me which was what I needed. I didn't want anybody in my face asking questions about getting back into the ring or trying to persuade me to get back in. I knew that if I didn't fight anybody within the next couple of months that I will lose the heavy weight belly but with the baby and shit going on with
Y/N and I, that was the last thing on my mind.
"Shh baby" I whispered to Amara continuing to bounce her some making my way to her car seat as I placed her in it. "Shh look" I started off hitting the punching bag softly as she just looked at me wide awake. I stood there in position hitting the bag a little harder as Amara was quiet as a mouse.
I just knew Y/N was done and going to leave me now. I've been so out of it since I fought Drago. My self esteem was shot and I just didn't feel like me. This fight fucked me up mentally and all I can think of is Y/N slipping right through my hands. I look at her with so much love and I feel like at this point she's just tolerating me. I felt tears start to run down my face as I begun hitting the bag harder.
I was going to force her into another man's arms because I wasn't sure of myself. I was supposed to be that man and everyone I turn around, I'm fucking it up again and again. I then held the bag, placing my forehead on it and let out a frustrated scream. "Fuck" I whispered to myself forgetting Amara was watching. I looked over at her in her causeway as she just laid there watching me. "I'm sorry baby" I apologized wiping my tears away and walking over to her. "Daddy's acting like a bitch" I admitted picking her up and holding her close to my chest. "Daddy's a bitch, I know" I admitted.
I placed a kiss on her head as I heard heels click against the floor. I looked up and seen Y/N standing there dressed the way she was when she left the house earlier today. We just looked at each other before she walked up to me slowly. "D, baby" she said before taking Amara from me and placing her back in her car seat. Y/N then came over to me and gave me an embracing hug.