I want to put a disclaimer to PLEASE DO NOT BECOME ADDICTED TO SLEEP DEPRIVATION LIKE DESCRIBED IN THIS/FUTURE CHAPTERS!!
I am NOT trying to glamorize sleep deprivation. I am currently struggling really bad with an addiction with sleep deprivation (as silly as it sounds), so please don't do it.
I think this is the last filler until I write what I've been planning out for a bit.
Unedited.
Casey
I think things are getting better.
I mean, I'm not sleeping at all but I'm always feeling bubbly and hyper. I'm socializing more with friends and am a delight to be around. I'm not sure what's happening, but I think I'm running off the highs of sleep deprivation.
Oh well, at least I'm happier.
My eyes remain glued to Westley, no matter how hard I try looking away. Maybe it's because I don't want to look away. I could stare at his adorable face for hours. So many of his features I haven't noticed before come out from observing him.
I notice the faint freckles peppered across his cheeks. I notice the way his nose wrinkles when an odd or confusing scene comes on. I notice that when he smiles or laughs, his eyes almost disappear and his cheeks fullen. Oh, how precious he is.
Suddenly, the boys gaze switches to me. I take a moment to admire his eyes. Oh, how magic they seem. So much life and wonder lie behind those baby blues. He squints at me, his nose wrinkling during the action. I hold back a smile. "What's wrong?"
"Oh, nothing. I spaced out or something."
"Oh, okay." Phew, that was close. "Do you like this movie? We can change it if you don't."
I forgot what was happening in the movie. It's some Christmas movie he watched numerous times as a kid, and he insisted I watch it with him. It's cute, but Westley is cuter. Trying not to scowl at my cheesy thoughts, I reply. "No, I like it."
Westley smiles before looking back at the movie.
As the movie goes on, I feel as if Westley and I are magents. Our bodies scoot closer towards each other, begging to touch. Oh, how I want to touch him. Not sexually, just in any way possible. I don't care if it's our knees touching for a split second, I want to touch him.
Suddenly, our hands touch. I almost jerk mine away, but once I realize Westley isn't moving his, I leave it.
Slowly, our fingers slide into each other, intertwining. There's not enough words in the world to explain the butterflies in my stomach. Butterflies. I have actual fucking butterflies gliding through my guts. I thought that only existed in stupid movies or romance novels my sister tells me about.
My thumb glides across his knuckles, rubbing his skin. Peace flows through my body as I hold his gentle hand. I glance at Westley, who is too busy looking at the movie. However, a pink tint cast over his cheeks, darkening by the second.
I like touching Westley. Feeling our skin touch makes me feel...weird, but in a good way. Gosh, what is this boy doing to me? Why do I keep feeling this way? Maybe I should listen to my sister and try figuring out my feelings.
"Someone's calling you."
What? It's Saturday afternoon, who's calling me? Maybe it's my sister or my mom? What if it's my dad? I'm kidding; my dad would never call me first. "Who?"
"Am I allowed to check your phone?"
The tone of Westley's voice causes questions to form in my mind. Why did he use the word 'allowed'? Has something or someone happened before to make him feel hesistent? Maybe he just wanted to be sure because some people are weird about grabbing others phones?
"Go ahead, yeah."
Westley grabs my vibrating phone, glancing at the screen. "Oh, are you close with Russell?"
Oh, shit, why is Russell calling me? We haven't talked since, well, I stopped sex to jack off to the thought of Westley. That was days ago and I haven't answered a text since. "He's my best friend's brother, so, yeah, we're chill."
I decline the call, scan over the messages he's sent, then turn my phone off. Westley's face crinkles with confusion,"Why didn't you answer?"
"Because I'm hanging out with you," I shrug. Westley smiles at my words, his cheeks growing redder than before. It's so adorable how he blushes so much from me. "Why are you blushing?"
"What? No, no, no, I'm not blushing," Westley insists.
"I think you are."
The blonde rolls his eyes in a playful manner, "Why would I be blushing?"
"I don't know, that's why I asked."
Westley sighs, "you're so lame." He looks back at the screen, confusion flashing across his face. "What the fu-" Westley claps his hand over his mouth, eyes widening. "I'm so sorry."
"It's okay, my grandparents aren't home."
The boy rapidly shakes his head, "no, no, no, it's just that I don't like cussing."
To me, I think it's funny how now a day, if a teenager doesn't't cuss, it's weird. I know I'm quite the potty mouth, so Westley not being one is interesting to me. "Why?"
"I have younger siblings and I don't want to make it a habit."
Oh, yeah, that's right, he's the oldest. "You haven't told me much about your siblings. Tell me about them."
Westley's eyes lit up Christmas lights ad he begins to speak about his siblings. Based on his tone and words, I can tell his siblings hold a special place in his heart. I learned that his 12 year old sister, McKenna, is the 'world's biggest diva' while his brother Greg, who's 10, is his cool little buddy.
I find his adoration for his siblings precious.
"Can I ask you something," Westley asks after finishing his ramble. "You don't have to answer."
Oh, no, now I'm scared. "Sure."
"So...why don't you live with your dad? I thought custody went to the other parent if one is prison?" I don't expect him to ask something so deep. I also forgot about the night I told Westley about my mom. "I'm sorry, you don't have to answer or-"
"You're okay, don't worry," I wave off. I suppose it's okay to let Westley know about my dad. Opening up is my least favorite thing, but Westley's different. He can read me like a book.
"My dad's a firefighter, so he works a lot. I also don't like his family at all, so he let me live here instead."
"Why don't you like his family?" I wanted to speak, but I can't. No one knows other than my family and Randy, and that's already too much. Westley might never talk to me again if he finds out. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to overstep or-"
"No, it's okay, it's just...complicated." Westley nods, understanding some things are best kept to self. "I like it better here, anyways. My grandparents are chill."
Before Westley can respond, my stomach makes the loudest, angriest noise I've ever heard. I blink at the noise, unsure why my body is acting weird. Is it nerves? "Have you eaten today?"
Have I eaten today? Didn't I eat before Westley came over? No, I felt too nervous. Hm... maybe I haven't eaten today. Maybe that's why my stomach is acting weird. "I'm not sure."
"Are you hungry?" I think I am. I'm not sure, though. Due to my foggy but active brain, my body feels numb to everything. Plus, I'm used to hungry pains. "I think you should eat something."
Why is he so caring? I swear, I could kiss him on the lips from his sweetness. "Maybe." I don't want to eat, though. I don't want to feel sick and ruin my mood around Westley. I do need to eat, though, especially if my stomach is making weird ass noises. "Maybe, yeah."
We pause the movie and go to the kitchen. I'm not sure what food Westley likes, so I'm glad he suggested eating because now I can learn more about him. Maybe he's vegan or something like that. I'm not sure what vegans eat, to be honest, but I'll figure something out.
"What's your favorite food," I wonder.
"Hmm... probably chicken nuggets," Westley beams. Oh, so he's not vegan. "Ooh, ooh, ooh, or cookies. I love cookies."
Gosh, why is he so adorable?
I took this idea from one of my besties going on a date with a guy(they're now dating) and the small touches and such. I legit told him I'm stealing the idea for my book💀
Wrote this while sobbing over a guy I'm talking with not texting back :/ He's on vacation right now, but it's like boy why tf haven't you texted me back in 5 days💀 you said you wanted to go to Hawaii with me, cmon now💀 anyways, sigh, I'm done with men :/
The hoe life ain't for the weak, I get attached to people the moment they show my an ounce of attention, so😔 sigh😔 I have a good feeling about this guy though, like he isn't just one of the hoes😔
I'll keep y'all updated, though😼 I'm gonna give him a few more days before I move on😻
I wanted to write more at the end, like them cooking together, but then I got an awful migraine from crying, so I stopped writing💀 ah well💀
I hope y'all enjoyed!! Don't forget to vote, comment, and follow!!
~whoops