Zayn's POV
"Why aren't you saying anything?" I asked, my voice trembling.
His silence was breaking my heart a little by little. He was looking down at our joined hands as I sat opposite of him on the edge of the terrace.
He stayed silent, ignoring my question. He slowly pulled his hands out of mine and in that moment I knew what was coming. My eyes filled with tears and heart ached. Keeping my head down, I tried my best to not break down at that moment.
I knew it would happen and it hurts.
"I am sorry for what happened. Z-zayn, maybe we... Maybe we should take a break for a while. I need some time" His voice held fear and hesitation
I wanted to say so much things. I wanted to tell him, "I won't kill you, my love. Break my heart in any way you want but don't be scared of me" but I knew If I speak my voice will betray me and I would not be able to do anything except crying and begging him.
"I am not leaving you, I just need some time. It's too much" He said, so calmly, giving me fake assurance like we tell kids the moon is walking with them when it's only them who is walking, the moon is far away.
"You should go" I whispered
"Please look at me" he whispered back, coming closer. He grabbed my cheeks so gently and made me look at him.
My vision was blurred because of the tears. For a minute I thought maybe now he will have some mercy on me, maybe now he will embrace me but he pulled back, his hand left, leaving me cold.
"I have to go" He said so slowly I barely heard him.
"Okay" that's all I said before getting up and walking out of the terrace door. Each step I took to that door, I was hoping for him to come and stop me, I was waiting for him to come and hold me. As always, he didn't.
All these years, I have been running after him and he never had the courage to take even one step. He is always leaving me. It's him who wanted this relationship, it was him not me. I begged him to not break my heart when he was asking to carry it. He didn't just break it, he smashed it to the ground, shattered it and then stepped on the remaining few pieces.
I somehow made my way to my room. I locked the door and stood there for a moment, blankly staring at the photo of two of us on the nightstand beside my bed. I walked up to it, picked it up so gently and then smashed it to the wall.
"Fucking thank you for killing me, Mr Cyrus"