A few minutes later; the same day
Linnie-
I'm still thinking about what Donny and I just spoke about while I'm walking to the Boutique to meet Ashley (I know everyone's shorthand for it is the Bistro now but it'll always be the Boutique to me). To tell the truth, I don't know what I was expecting his answer to be and I'm not sure what my reaction would be to any of them. I can't believe I got defensive when he didn't automatically say 'yes'. It's a big decision and I should kick myself for asking it in the first place especially since only moments before I was voicing the same concerns in my head that Donny did.
I arrive at the store and it's busy as usual these days. I get shouts and even cat-called about Pantsuit Powderkeg before I spot Ash. I see Gina but I don't see Kenny. I shrug. Maybe he took a day off.
"What's up, Ash?" I ask, "You wanted to see me?"
"Sure do, girl," she says, "come with me upstairs. You're mom's not here, she's visiting Chester, there's something else that wants to see you."
We get upstairs and open the door and I see a face I haven't seen in awhile.
"Derrick!?" I skreech excitedly; this is a nice surprise. Derrick is Ashley's son; he's one of the most successful black Hollywood wheelers and dealers. I run to and give him a big hug and kiss on the cheek.
"How've you been?!" I ask, "What brings you into town?!"
"I've been great, Carolynn." he replies
"Boy, I told you she goes by 'Linnie' now." Ashley scolds her son.
"It's alright, Ash," I say, "so tell me, why are you here?"
"I'm here for you, Miss Powderkeg." he reveals. Ugh, I should have known. Makes sense; he's works for many of the top movie studios in Hollywood. I really don't want to hear another movie pitch but since he came all this way, for me, I should at least hear him out. Besides, he's an old friend, it would be rude if I rolled my eyes and left.
"Ok," I say dryly, "what's the movie pitch?"
"It's actually not a pitch, but an offer," he explains, "we already have the rights to option your video for a movie. We have a script, a cast and crew; it's going to be made. My question for you is, would you like to come LA and be our consultant since, obviously, you were there. This is, after all, essentially a biopic of you."
"Of me?" I ask, curiously, "All I did was stand up for myself and the man that I love and people decided to film it on their phones. I've only been doing all these interviews because Donny encouraged me to do it so it'll raise my self esteem. Outside of that video, my life has been pretty boring."
"The hell it has," Ashley pipes in, "you were living a lie until you met that boy of yours."
"That's true, Ash," I reply, "Speaking of, you want me to call him to come over here? I assume he's coming, too, since he's as much apart of that video as he is."
"The offer is only for you, unfortunately," Derrick says, "and with respect, he doesn't have that much to do with the video, at least not to public perception."
"Well, you're doing a biopic on my life, right?" I say, starting to sound annoyed, "And he's the most important part of that. He's who inspired me to do what I did in the video. Is he even portrayed in this thing?"
"Sure, he is," he says, "he's your boyfriend after all."
"Well, I'm not going unless he can go, too!" I strongly protest
"Then he'll have to make his own flight and hotel accomodations and he won't be allowed in the lot." he says sternly, "Look, I'm not here to force you to do anything, but to be honest, if I were you, a young, attractive, sexy lady like you wouldn't want him along anyways."
"What the hell are you sayin' now, Derrick?" Ashley asks. I'm very curious, too, "You want her to break up with her boyfriend just to go do this movie?"
"I would." he says, "You only get to be young once. If you agree to do this, you're bound to cheat on him, anyways, it's the nature of the beast. So save him some heartache and ditch the ball n chain now."
"How dare you!" I say, "Donny is not my ball n chain, he's the love of my life! And if you think I'm going to cheat on him or leave him so I can have some temporary fun with some Hollywood meatheads!"
"It's up to you," he says, "but I need an answer here and now; I return to LA tomorrow and I've got two other tickets. This will be your only opportunity; no other studio can legally do this movie. And if the answer's yes, I'm going to need to sign a contract. And before you say anything I already spoke with your press secretary, Larry, and he's fully on board and he's even coming, too, he's the other ticket, in case you want to bring your boyfriend up again."
"You should really think about this girl," warns Ashley, "he's basically strong-armin' you to choose between Donny and this movie."
I take afew minutes to think about it. He makes some good points. Donny seemed like he was on the fence about our relationship anyways. It has been nice getting all that male attention after watching Donny get all this female attention since I met him. Do I really want to do this? Maybe, we don't have to break up, maybe we can just take a break, so he can make up his mind. This could be the next step in my artistic career? Donny will surely understand, won't he?
"Derrick?" I say, "When do we leave, again?"
Later that night
Donny-
Kenny and Chad's given me a lot to think about and though I haven't thought about how or when yet or even if; but it doesn't hurt to be prepared. I keep my mom's old things in Kenny and Gina's basement at their house. I get something that means a lot to me; something I thought I'd never want to give to anyone but Linnie's exceptionally special; my mom would love her and insist I give this to her. But if I do this which, let's face it, I probably will but I have to figure the most perfect way to do it. This is Linnie after all.
I'm on my way back to our department when I hear someone calling my name
"Donny!?" it's Linnie, I thought she'd be home already. What in the world could Ashley be talking with her about for so long?"
"Gorgeous!" I shout, we're in the middle of the street, "What are you doing out so late? Did Ashley ask you to build her an Armoire or something?" I joke
"I could ask you the same thing, Donny." She says. What happened to 'Sexy-Boy'? "What's in the box?" She noticed the box I got from Kenny's house that belonged to my mother
"Nevermind what's in the box, Brad Pitt," I say, "so what's going on?"
"Ooh, this is going to be tougher than I thought." she says hesitantly.
"What are you talking about?" I say with a grin but she looks real serious.
"Okay," she says taking a deep breath, "I don't know how else to say this so I'm just going to."
"Say what?" I say, now I'm feeling a little nervous
"Ashley's son Derrick is here," she begins, "he's a big Hollywood wheeler and dealer and he offered me a consulting position for a movie there making about my video."
"You mean our video." I correct, "You get these offers all the time and you turned them down. That's what you did here, right? That's what kept you there for so long? He was pushing you on it and you had to let out that ol' Linnie stubborn sternness, right?" She shakes her head guiltily. I already don't like where this is going.
"This is different; they already have a script, a cast, everything," she says, "they're making a biopic. They're going to tell my story."
"Again, I say, you mean our story!" I say now I'm getting irritated
"Please, don't bother me with semantics right now, this is serious!" she screams, "So you think I should do it or not?"
"Do I think you should do it or not?" She asks. I start to calm down. Well at least she's valuing my opinion here.
"Yes, I think we should go," I say, "this could be a great opportunity for us."
"Uh.." she trails like she wasn't expecting me to say this, "We? Us? I'm sorry but they only want me. Now, what's in the box?"
"Forget the box," I say, "what do you mean they only want you? Why can't I come?"
"Because it's my video and my story," she says, "and you're only a bit player." I can't believe what I'm hearing.
"A bit player!?" I yell, "I'm in that video, too! And while we're on the topic; on these interviews you've been doing, you've mentioned me less and less!"
"Please don't yell at me," she says, "Larry said it would be good for my image."
"'Larry'!" I repeat in anger, "that's all I hear from you these days is 'Larry this and Larry that'! If i didn't know any better I'd think you're sleeping with him." As soon as I say those words I see her complexion change. "Holy fuck! You did! When you were in New York!"
"No I didn't I swear!" she screams with tears in her eyes. She's got some nerve to be the one crying.
"Then it was someone else!?" I yell.
"No," she snaps back, "but I could have if I wanted to!"
"I can't believe what I'm hearing!" I shout, "Are you listening to yourself?! Why are you talking like this?! Did someone get in your head?!"
"Yeah!" she yells back, "someone did get in my head. You did!"
"I did? What are you talking about?!" I'm really pissed.
"I ask one question about our future and you revert to the same scared little boy you were when I first met you!" She screams
"Oh, no," I emphatically protest, "you don't dare get to put this on me. You brought up marriage out of the blue and yes, I got scared it's a big commitment but I spoke with Chad and Kenny earlier and they gave me some good advice."
"Is that where you got that box?" she asks
"Stop asking me about the box!" I shout, "I don't know about you but I'm committed to this relationship. So much so that I'll fly there on my own dime and pay for my own hotel."
"Why would you even want to go," she asks, "you have law school."
"And I'd choose to be there with you over that in a heartbeat!" I say. Now I'm crying, "You asked me before if I think you should go; I changed my mind I don't want you to go!"
"Why?! I thought you'd be happy for me," she cries, too. Keep in mind that we're still in the middle of the street, and it's passed midnight but there's still cars slowing down because of the commotion we're causing, "why won't you let me follow my dream!?"
"I thought the art is your dream!" I yell
"This is art," she protests, "this is just the next step of that!"
"What kind of bullshit thing is that?!" I yell
"You say you're committed to this relationship," she yells, "but you can't even let me do this. Maybe Carl was right about you all along! Maybe we should take a break because you're obviously not ready."
"You dare bring up Daddy Dearest now!?" I yell, "Knowing what we know!?"
"SHHH" she's mocking me from earlier, "we can't talk about this!" she mock whispers what I said earlier
"Do you still love me!?" I ask. I think she wasn't expecting that suddenly she changes her tone
"Of course I do!?" she pleads, "But this is something I have to do alone."
"You mean you already said yes?!" and I thought that day in my old apartment when she told me to stay away from her and Spencer was the angriest I've ever been, actually speaking of sociopaths, "You know you're worse than Spencer ever was! He might be a narcissist sociopath but he never ran away from you when things got tough!"
"Please stop," she pleads, "I'm sorry I said all that, I don't know what's come over me!"
"I know what it is," I say, "this video has gotten to your head. Don't think I haven't noticed how giddy you get when other men fawn over you. You've thought about going to LA and have some sexy fun with other guys; that's why you don't want me to come; that's why you want us to take a break. Don't forget I'm the reason you're red-pilled enough to even do what you did on that stupid video! You want a break because you wanted a free pass to go out to LA and fuck all the guys you want!"
"Don't say that, it's not true!" she's clearly regretting all she said to me and I should probably stop but I can't. This is breaking my heart.
"Well, I'm close aren't I?!" I don't need her to confirm it
"Please, I change my mind," she says, "I don't want a break, I don't want to go. I love you!"
"Well, you should've thought about that before you went changed into a different person after just a few hours and broke my heart tonight." I'm not stopping until she hears everything I have to say, "It's this Derrick that got in your head isn't it? I know his type; I went to college and one year of law school out there remember? How weak is that? But you were already thinking these things you just needed someone to validate them. You really hurt me tonight, Gorgeous. And that's the last time you'll ever hear me call you that."
"What?" she asks and then a look of terrified realization comes across her face, "...no...you don't mean...please, I'm sorry! Please, don't do this!"
"You have no one to blame but yourself, Carolynn," I say, "you don't deserve to be called what you want to be called! We're done! Broken up! Through!" As I see her crying so profusely and wanting to come and embrace me I start to shake my resolve as I realize what I've done but I can't take it back, "you go enjoy making your movie and fuck all the guys you want. Don't let me stand in your way!" I begin to walk away and I remember something, "you wanna know what's in the box? What we talked about earlier got me thinking and I got good advice from Kenny and Chad so I brought something that was my mother's for you. I just didn't know when and how I'd give to you but since it doesn't matter anymore, here." I throw the box to her
Linnie-
I catch the box. But by now, I'm pretty sure I know what's in it and it devastates me that I blew this. I'm a mess. I've made the biggest mistake of my life. Why did I say all those things to him!? I have to talk to Derrick I have to get out of this contract. But then I hear Donny talk again,
"Look, I'm sorry," he says a lot calmer now, "I went too far and you were clearly apologizing." He kisses me more passionately than ever if that was even possible. "Look, I love you and I trust you. I really do. You're not Brook. But neither one of us can take back what we both said tonight. So we're not broken up," I feel a huge wave of relief, "but I agree we do need a break so we can figure out what we want out of this relationship. So go to LA, go make your movie and when you get back we can talk about it. Here," he extends his hand I take it without hesitation, "it's late, I'll walk you home. I'm going to sleep at Chester's."
We don't say anything the whole way and I don't blame him. I'm an idiot. What was I thinking!? How could I ever choose anything over Donny?! I have to get out of this contract. Maybe we can speak to everyone's favorite sociopath (Spencer), contract law is his area of expertise after all. I have to make this right. I have to fix this.
Damn that stupid video. He's right; it blew up my head. I don't want a break, I just want him. When he asked me if I still love him that brought me to planet Earth. But it would be no use saying all these things to him now. What an incredible guy even after all the nasty things I said to him and still be this sweet and apologize for yelling back at me. He didn't go too far. I deserved everything he said to me.
I'm so caught up in my thoughts I don't realize he's opened the apartment door for me. I'm completely despondent. He even makes sure he brings me to bed but there's no way I'm sleeping tonight and it's too late to call anyone to feel sorry for myself. Ashley's mad at me; she tried to talk me out of it but I wouldn't listen.
"Please, don't go!" I plead
"Oh yeah, I forgot about that, I'll sleep on the couch tonight, I won't let those Irishmen get to you." I forgot about that too, I wasn't even talking about that, I just wanted him. "If you leave before I'm up tomorrow morning, please don't wake me, I have law school at noon and this fight's taken a lot out of me. But I'll say one last thing, if you go over there and you do end up sleeping with someone, at least do it with an A-lister so you'll have a story to tell." he chuckles and that just put the nail in my coffin. He even manages to make a joke out of this.
I try to get up to join him on the couch but he's already asleep and he probably would reject me anyways and I can't blame him. Tonight I may have done the stupidest thing I've ever done and that includes almost marrying Spencer. All night I pace in my room and I think about what I'm going to say to Derrick and especially what I'm going to say to Donny. Donny's being incredibly forgiving now so maybe there's a chance I can fix this. There's one thing I do know. I am not going on that plane! I don't care if they sue me!
Just in case it's not clear, what was in the box was an engagement ring. The ring that Russ gave to Lisa when they got engaged.
End of chapter please comment and vote below