The next few days were much like the first. Teachers were surprised to see me, and students whispered in hushed tones while they snuck looks at me. I hid behind my book or Ava as much as I could. The attention only lasted a few weeks. After that, something else grabbed the attention of my classmates and they just accepted that I wasn't going to spontaneously combust in the middle of the hallway. Days turned into weeks and weeks into months. I was beginning to feel somewhat normal again.
Over the months since going back to school, I felt myself healing in a way. I was sleeping more, probably not enough still, but my nights at the waterfall were less often than before. My father was barely home except for the weekends so that left me alone with my mother almost all the time. The weekends were better when he and my brother were home.
I stuck with Ava as much as I could. I ran into Holden sometimes but he never seemed to seek me out. He kept his eyes on me when I was in the same room. I glanced over at his abandoned lunch table. He must have skipped. Being stared at by him was weird.
Once I was no longer worried about his strange gaze, I relaxed completely and made jokes with Ava's friends. I realized that Ava was only really close with a few of them, the others at the table were a separate friend group who just happened to sit here. Aside from Lenny, Ava only really talked to a girl named Sarah and another boy named Ben. Sarah wore thick glasses over her bright blue eyes and always had her light brown hair swirled into a knot on top of her head.
Ben ran his hand through his hair and laughed as Lenny told him a dirty joke. I giggled too but kept my eyes on my book. I was reading The Great Gatsby. I had a copy a few years ago but I couldn't find it now so my mom bought me a new one. Ben had made some passes at me over the last few months but never urged me for anything. I assumed he was giving me time to adjust back to life before broaching the subject of dating. He was cute, bright blue eyes that reminded me of the ocean and blond hair the color of sand. He could probably blend in with the beach. I was not looking forward to inevitably having to turn him down. I ran my fingers through my deep violet hair. I dyed it last night so the color was vibrant.
The chair to my left dragged across the ground. I looked over to see Holden lowering himself into the chair next to me. His dark eyes pierced into mine and a smirk tugged at his lip.
I wrenched my eyes away from his soft looking lips. "Ava, I'm going to head to class," I said, attempting to ignore Holden.
"I'll walk you," Holden replied. My eyes widened as I looked at Ava.
"I'll come too," she said standing up. We tossed our trash on the way out and I walked with my arm linked through Ava's. Holden walked behind us. He didn't say anything until Ava and I got to our English classroom.I turned to the doorway, but he grabbed my elbow before I could walk in. Electric heat danced under his touch.
"I wanted to talk to you," he said. I turned his way and let go of Ava who walked into the room without me. My eyes fell to her. She wouldn't leave me here alone with him.
"Who said I wanted to talk to you?" I asked, turning away. He grabbed my wrist and spun me back around to face him, catching me around the waist when I stumbled.
"I want to see you," he said.
"You can see me now," I replied, pulling out of his grasp. "Go to class," I said, backing into my classroom.
I want to see you tonight, I heard his voice say. I glanced back down the hall, and he was well out of ear shot already.
Ava was sitting in her desk when I came down the aisle. "What did he want?" she asked as I dropped my bag on the floor.
"I don't know," I responded.
I didn't really talk the rest of class. Anytime I was near him, I felt calm, safe. I couldn't explain it. Take a deep breath, doll, his voice echoed in my head. I quickly obeyed.
"Ron, you okay?" Ava whispered. "You look green."
I nodded and took a sip of my water. "Just nervous," I responded. I took a deep breath as the teacher dismissed us.
"Just don't let him talk you into anything you don't want to do," she reminded me as we walked out of the room.
I nodded and headed my sperate way to anatomy. I sighed as I realized that Holden wasn't there yet. I would have a few minutes to gather myself before he would want to talk. With any luck, he would show up right as class started and I could blame my need to pay attention on avoiding it.
I walked down the row of blacktop desks to the back of the classroom. My foot caught something, and I felt myself falling. I tucked my arms and braced to hit the ground with my eyes squeezed shut, knowing I'd probably do more damage trying to catch myself.
The impact never came, and I slowly opened one eye. Holden was standing above me, one arm cradled around the small of my back. My shirt lifted slightly, and his hand was on bare skin, electrifying at his touch. Goosebumps raised on my skin at the contrast of his hot hands. "It's nice to meet you, I'm Holden," he said, flashing me a smile.
"What are you doing?" I asked, stifling a laugh as I looked into his midnight eyes.
"I'm starting over. From the beginning," he said. "Are you going to tell me your name?"
"Are you going to let me stand back up?" He rose me back to my feet, his hand hesitating on my back before leaving my skin completely. The electricity stopped with the loss of contact and I was left with the ghost of his hand. "I'm Ronnie," I said, playing along with his game.
"It's nice to meet you, Ronnie," he said. I squinted my eyes at him.
"What's the angle here, Holden? Something has to be up," I said. He put his hand on my back and guided me to my chair. I dropped into my seat with my bag on the floor.
"I want to be friends."
"You've been staring at me for months without speaking and now you want to be friends?" I questioned.
"You'll understand eventually," he replied with a smirk. I pulled my notebook out and began drawing swirls on the first page. I felt the ghost of his hand on my back as the teacher began the lesson. He was nowhere near me when I fell. It was like he came out of thin air just to save me from my own clumsiness.
I looked over at him as he took notes. He glanced up at me and smirked back, his dark eyes catching mine. My cheeks warmed at his smile. "I have a question," I whispered, ignoring my blush and scooting a little closer to him.
"Hm?" he hummed, not completely looking at me.
"How did you catch me that fast?"
His eyes got wide but he didn't look at me. As quickly as he lost his composure, it was back again. "What do you mean?" He forced his head down further and his shirt gaped on his back, revealing black ink in swirls and lines.
"You weren't behind me. You came out of nowhere," I said, leaning closer once again. I was mainly trying to get a better look at the ink. He cupped the back of his neck with his hand. Maybe my shifting eyes drew his attention to it.
He looked down at his book. "I was coming in when I saw you trip," he explained poorly. I nodded my understanding but stayed quiet about my skepticism. "Are you busy tonight?"
I shrugged. "My mom keeps me pretty close," I said. "Ava is barely able to come over."
"Even for homework?" he asked.
"That's mainly when Ava is allowed over," I said.
Ms. Walker paused mid-sentence and her eyes glassed over, as if she was listening for something. "I'm going to have everyone do a project with their table partner," she said after a minute. "They will be due on Monday, so you better work together through the weekend." She went into the project that she wanted us to have done in four days. It was complicated and didn't make much sense to me, but Holden seemed to grasp it well enough. He jotted down bullet points in his notebook and slammed it shut as the bell rung.
"Do you want to work on the project tonight?" he asked as we walked out of the classroom.
"Uh," I thought for a moment. "Yeah, but I have to ask my mom. Do you want to ride with me, or do you have a car?" I asked.
"No, I don't have a car," he said.
"Okay, but I don't know if there's room in the cab for three," I said as I pulled my phone from my pocket and dialed my mother.
"Three?" he asked as it rang.
"Ava rides with me," I explained as we hit the stairs outside. My mom picked up on the fourth ring.
"Veronica? Is everything okay?" she asked.
"Yeah, mom. I just have an anatomy project due Monday and it's a lot to do. It's with a partner, do you mind if we work on it at the house today?" I asked.
"Oh of course not, sweetie," she answered.
"Okay, I'll be home soon. Gotta drop Ava off first." I ended the call and shoved the phone back in my pocket as we reached my truck. Ava was leaning against the passenger door.
"What's he doing here, Ron?" she almost spat.
"We have an anatomy project due Monday and got partnered together," I responded, shoving my key in the door to unlock it.
"Anatomy project? What are you talking about?" she asked once I unlocked her door.
"The one Ms. Walker assigned," I told her.
"My class didn't have a project," she said, climbing in.
"Maybe your class isn't as advanced," Holden smirked, leaning against the frame. His deep eyes bore into me. "Is there room for me in there?"
"I told you there may not be," I reminded. "The truck does have a bed though." I jerked my thumb backwards.
"Ronnie, you're kidding," he said. My face never wavered. He glanced toward Ava.
"Don't look at me. I'm staying with the seatbelts," Ava said.
"Fine." He shut my door and climbed in the bed of the truck. He leaned against the cab with his legs straight out and his hands on the back of his neck.
I slid open the window on the back next to him. "Duck if you see any cops. I can't afford a ticket," I told him, laughing. He looked to be in a relaxed position, but I could see how tight his muscles were. I stopped in the traffic to get out of the parking lot and took advantage of him not paying attention to look for the black ink on his back again. Unfortunately for me, his shirt was pulled all the way up. Ava looked at me questioningly as I focused on his back. "What?" she mouthed.
"Tattoo. On his back," I mouthed back. She looked but saw nothing, the same as I did, and shrugged. I eased off the brake as the car in front of me zoomed into traffic and I veered the opposite direction towards Ava's house. "Do you know when your mom's car is going to be fixed?" I asked her.
"No, the mechanic is giving her the run around. We'd fix it ourselves, but we don't have a lift to get under it and really see what's going on," Ava said. Her family owned the largest farm in the county. Most people around here were dairy farmers or some kind of livestock breeder, but Ava's family were tobacco farmers. They had at least six tobacco barns on their property.
"It doesn't help that there's only one mechanic shop on that side of the river. She'd have to tow the thing into the city to get it looked at for a fair price," I agreed. She sighed as I turned onto her road. "I guess I'll just have to keep picking my best friend up every day," I laughed.
She giggled too as I pulled onto the dirt drive. "Thanks for the ride, Ron," she said. "Same time tomorrow but without the company?" She side eyed Holden who was climbing down from the bed of the truck.
"See you tomorrow, Ava," I responded as she climbed out of the seat. Holden took her spot next to me and slammed the door behind him.
"Hey, be nice to the truck," I chastised him. He put his hands up in defeat and I looked back over to Ava who was halfway to the front door.
"Are we leaving?" he asked as I watched her fumble with her keys.
"Once she gets in the house, yes," I said. He nodded. "I just think, maybe if someone had done this for me, I never would have disappeared." I spoke the word aloud for the first time.
"You can't know that," he said. I shrugged, putting the truck in reverse and heading back the way I came. "You know that's not what happened to you."
"I don't know what happened at all," I reminded him. "I don't even know where I was taken from." Tears welled up in my eyes.
"You never..."
I shook my head. "I never read any of the police reports. Not the one my parents filed when they realized I was missing, not the one from when they found me, not even the witness statement from whoever found me. I don't even know where I was found."
"You were wondering the street in Knoxville," he said. I slammed on the brake, both of us lurching forward.
"You read the reports?" I demanded more than asked.
"I didn't have to, doll," he said.
"That wasn't released to the media. You had to have read the reports."
"There's one other way I could know." I sat in silence, trying to comprehend what he was implying. "You were stumbling around in the dark. Your hair was longer, lighter in color and you were so skinny. They couldn't have been giving you much to eat." I knew what he was talking about. That's why I dyed my hair when I came home and I was on a diet given to me by a nutritionist at the hospital designed to make me gain the weight back.
The images appeared in my head as he voiced them, but not from my point of view, from his. Like I was seeing his memory in place of my own, forgotten one. "Your cheeks were sunken in, and you were so frail you could barely walk. I couldn't tell who you were, but I knew you needed help. I stopped to see if I could help, and you fell in my arms, so I picked you up and carried you to the nearest place that was open to call an ambulance. When I got you into the light, I realized it was you. You said my name, you remembered me for just a second and then you passed out.
"The paramedics let me ride with you to the hospital when I told them you went missing across the state a year ago. The police showed up, a couple hours later your parents got there and kicked me out of the room. I tried to explain to them that I knew you from school and I happened to be in the right place at the right time. They didn't completely believe me."
"Holden," I interrupted. "I don't completely believe you. You're telling me that I knew you, intimately, for a month before I disappeared, and then you saved my life, and I still manage to forget you?" My head was spinning.
"I know, it seems crazy-"
"Why are you so forgettable to me? You don't exactly have one of those faces that would be easy to forget. Everything else from before I disappeared is hazy, but it's there. You have been completely wiped from my mind. I might as well have met you the first time a few months ago." My chest heaved with every shallow breath I could force into my lungs.
Ronnie, just breathe. You're okay, his voice said while his mouth didn't move. My mind had a haze over it once again.
"How do you do that?" I spoke.
"Do what?"
"You're in my head." I put my hands over my ears and leaned against the steering wheel. "Get out of my head."
"Ronnie." His voice was muffled from my hands over my ears.
I took a deep breath, removed my hands, and sat up. The hazy feeling dissipated. "Get out," I said calmly.
"What?" he said.
"Get out of my truck," I said it louder this time. He grabbed his bag and stepped out of the truck. I sped off before the door was even closed, leaving him standing in the road.