how to be a pureblood 101...

By urlostchapstick

33.2K 1.2K 3.6K

when draco malfoy's muggle one night stand gives birth to his daughter he decides to carry on the family trad... More

housekeeping
"ruler of all the testosterone"
"dilfoy"
"is leo going country?"
"you know how Slytherins are"
"are you jealous"
"blowing bennetts off"
"any publicity is good publicity"
"different scarlet letters"
"it's not creepy it's romantic."
"nice grip"
"it's a date"
"a quidditch tactic"
"some bloody validation"
"it's pronounced sirius"
"reasons why chase mclaggen sucks"
"stay bitter"
"break out some pirouettes"
"mr prongs jr's responsibility"
"it was all fake"
"keep up appearances"
"taylor swift on the highest volume"
"james's room and clothes"
"alfredo"
"i have a boyfriend"
"so incompatible"
"cold hand"
"happy christmas eve"
"so fucking in sync"
"i just have to stay"
"overstayed your welcome"
"malfoy manor"
"don't get expelled"
"hermosa"
"going to murder"
"new girl for the playboy"
"prince charming"
"jimbob"
"auras and shit"
"spiked milk"
"blueberry pomegranate smoothie"
"my bra is next to you"
"swan lake"
"it's everyday bro"
"head of house"
"jealousy is a bad look"
"back off"
"don't drown"
"happy and in love"
"little miss competitive"
"gardening"
"jimmy fallon"
"my mum"
"if that's even your real name"
"vain narcissistic woman"
"happy birthday"
"down bad"
"with love"
"stop walking away"
"cheating"
"childless unmarried woman"
"the end"

"red is your color"

368 16 33
By urlostchapstick


"Why do you even want to go to the game?" Melinda asked James as they walked towards the pitch.

"Because my little sister is on the team." James answered with a laugh. "And I find out whether we win or lose the Cup."

"I suppose those are good reasons." Melinda teased. "Are we sitting with your friends?"

"If you're okay with that?" James replied.

"Yeah no problem." Melinda agreed, "Your brother doesn't really like me though."

"Dre doesn't like anyone," James reassured her, "He barely likes me half the time. And he won't sit with us, if he even comes to the match he'll be hidden away with Scorp."

"Hmm. Well we all sat together for your match."

"You did?" James asked shocked, "You didn't tell me that."

"Yeah because I didn't want to worry you."

"Why would I worry?" James asked concerned.

"Because Dre said I was your girl of the week."

"Of course he did." James groaned, "I'm so sorry about him, I'll yell at him then and make him apologize."

"No need." Melinda responded, "He already apologized. Pretty sure Leo forced him to."

"She was sitting with you guys?"

"I guess technically we sat with her. She was with Scorp and Dre and I wanted to meet your brother."

"Wait why the fuck were they even there?"

"Leo said she had to take notes-,"

"-No not her. She never misses a match. I mean my brother and Scorpius. Scorpius only goes when Leo is playing and Andres doesn't care about watching me."

"They didn't say." Melinda shrugged as they headed up the bleachers.

"Weird." James replied mindlessly as he chose a seat near the front.

"Jamesieeeee." George sung as he and Marco went to take a seat next to him. "You ready for some motherfucking Quidditch."

"Fuck yeah I am." James said giving him a fist bump.

"Hi Marco!" Melinda called out over James and George.

"Hi Melinda." Marco said giving her a polite smile in return.

"Are Fred and Bianca coming?" James asked George.

"Yeah they're probably just having a quickie before they get here." George replied.

"Horny mofos." James responded with a laugh.

"When are they not?" George asked rhetorically, "How's Lily feeling about the match?"

"She's nervous as fuck." James replied, "She thinks if she doesn't catch it then she's gonna let me down."

"As if you'd ever be upset with her."

"Exactly." James said with a sigh. "I'm still just proud she's on the team."

"The party has arrived." Fred said dramatically as he and Bianca walked up the bleachers and sat down behind them.

"Just in time, they're about to start." James said as he pulled out his Quidditch notebook.

"Are you going to be scribbling away in your notebook too?" Melinda asked James.

"I have perfect handwriting," James replied in mock offense, "I will be elegantly writing in my
notebook."

"What do you guys even write down?"Melinda asked curiously.

"Their plays, strengths, weaknesses, that sort of thing." James answered.

"What do you do when you're playing? Have someone take notes for you?"

"Nah. I'm usually good at taking mental notes while I'm playing. I don't trust anyone to take better notes than me."

"You don't trust anyone?" Fred asked suggestively.

"Not to be better than me." James reiterated, "Equal maybe."

"ITS A BEAUTIFUL DAY FOR SOME QUIDDITCH!"

James was never so grateful to hear Joey Tracker's voice. Fred sure liked to push Leo into his mind for someone who claimed to hate her.

"Quick manifestation that Slytherin wins." Bianca said reaching over Marco's shoulder to grab his hand.

"Yes I don't want to have to break into the commentary tower to get her again."  Marco said taking her hand.

"Universe let Slytherin win and let Leo have an average or above game so she isn't in a stage four depression." Bianca said closing her eyes.

"Amen." Marco nodded as she let go of his hand.

"If Slytherin keeps their heads out of their asses they can win." James said to Bianca behind him.

"Leo's been in a good mood this week so hopefully she plays well." Bianca added as the game began.

"Lily's been working extra hard after not getting the Snitch during Hufflepuff." James said as well as he began to take notes. "Hopefully she doesn't psych herself out."

"Are you guys gonna throw a party if you win the Cup?" Bianca asked Fred while James dialed into the match.

"Yeah we'll throw one tomorrow we said so you guys can have a victory party tonight. James and Leo agreed during Potions." Fred explained, "Both teams are theoretically invited to both parties. We share the common enemy of Ravenclaw."

"You and Leo agreed?" Melinda asked James.

"Yeah we're the Captains." James replied, not entertaining her accusatory tone. "That was a gorgeous pass. Montague and Tabitha work well together."

"They're dating." Marco informed him.

"Ah that makes sense then. Emotional connection." James replied understandingly. He grabbed onto Melinda's arm suddenly then relaxed, "Fuck I thought that was going in. Good stop Leo."

"You really don't want her to be scored on." Melinda said with a click of her tongue.

"I don't want Ravenclaw to get any points." James corrected, "There's a difference."

"Sounds about the same to me." Melinda replied annoyed.

"I want to win the Cup. Can't win the Cup if Slytherin loses." James reiterated.

"THATS TEN POINTS FOR SLYTHERINNNNNNN!"

"Great goal." James exclaimed as he marked down the details in his book.

As the match went on, Leo continued to block the shots of Ravenclaw as they racked up their own collection of points.

50-0, Slytherin.

"Thank Merlin Leo is doing good today." Marco leaned back to tell Bianca.

"For real. Hopefully she shows up to the Victory party then too since she missed the first one." Bianca agreed.

The group of students watched as Leo prepared for an upcoming shot from the Ravenclaw Chaser.


The Quaffle went right through the hoop.



... And Leo plummeted towards the ground after being hit in the face by a Bludger.


"Fuck." Bianca said standing up mindlessly.

"Merlin." Marco whispered grabbing onto George's hand.

Leo was grabbed mid air by Tabitha who carefully caught her to the ground.

"Should we go down there?" Bianca asked.

"Do you think she's alright?" Marco asked at the same time.

Hooch called it a fair goal at the while Tabitha helped Leo stand up on the field.

They couldn't make out the words, but the group all watched as Leo began screaming at Hooch with blood covering her face.

"She's okay." James voice came out barely audible as he took in a shaky breath.

"That is so much blood." George gawked.

"Here comes Pomfrey trying to heal her." Fred commented. "Ooo and she's yelling at her now too."

"My girl has undiagnosed anger issues." Bianca sighed as she sat back down.

"Yeah she's getting back on her broom." Marco said shaking his head, "Dumbass. Absolute dumbass."

"We're going to have to party in the medical suite." Bianca complained.

"Will she even want us?" Marco asked her, "She's never been injured this bad- this isn't in our Leo playbook."

"I'll text Scorpius and ask his opinion." Bianca replied urgently.

"She should be taking a break for real." George said to no one in particular.

"Definitely isn't safe." Fred agreed.

"She would rather die then sit out and you know it." James said not taking his eyes off the game. "It's up to Lily now since Hooch called that a fair goal. She needs to get the Snitch."

"Why wouldn't that be a fair goal?" Melinda asked, "I mean they scored it."

"You're not allowed to hit the Bludger at the Keeper after a Chaser enters the scoring area." James explained. "I'm assuming Hooch decided that the Beater hit it before the Chaser entered but usually refs call it no matter what as a safety precaution. But Hooch hates Leo."

"Or maybe Leo just didn't deserve the foul." Melinda argued.

"Doubtful. I wasn't watching the Beaters, but that's just the general rule. When Keepers are hit while trying to block a goal the goal typically won't count. Period. Unless it is completely obvious to everyone that it was hit before which it wasn't in this case."

"Hmm." Melinda hummed.

"Lily's diving." James gasped as he grabbed Melinda's leg, "FUCK YEAH!" James shouted standing up as Fred and George whooped and hollered as well.

"THE HOUSE CUP IS OURS!" George yelled as he pulled Marco over to kiss him.

"Fred put me down!" Bianca demanded laughing as Fred picked her up.

"You're looking at a House Cup winner."
James said to Melinda with a smirk.

"A handsome one at that." Melinda agreed as she stood up to kiss him.

"We'll catch you at the party later we need to go to the infirmary." Bianca told the group as she grabbed Marco's arm.

"Have fun with that. Hopefully she doesn't bite your head off." Fred called out with a laugh.

"Tell her we hope she's okay!" George added.

"I need to go tell Lils good job." James said to Melinda.

"I'll come! I haven't gotten to talk to your sister much. She's a lot nicer than Dre." Melinda replied happily.

"Come on then." James beckoned her down the bleachers.

*******

"I'm literally fine." Leo argued to Madma Pomfrey.

"Your nose is broken and you have a concussion." Pomfrey replied.

"Exactly. No biggie." Leo insisted. "Episky me and I'll go about my business."

"Episky will heal your nose but leave it crooked." Pomfrey replied handing her healing potions, "Do you want a crooked nose?"

"No." Leo sighed then downed the potion. "Can I leave now?"

"If I let you leave you're going to go party and that isn't going to help your condition."

"What if I promise to just lay on the couch and do nothing?" Leo asked hopefully.

"I'm getting too old for you children." Pomfrey sighed. "You can get discharged if your friends come and get you and promise that you will lay down and not drink. You cannot have alcohol with this potion."

"Done and done." Leo agreed. "I will not move from the couch."

"Leo!!" Marco called out as he entered the room.

"That's friends now!" Leo said excitedly.

"Aww sweet girl, how are you?" Bianca asked concerned.

"Absolutely fine." Leo said casually.

"Broke nose and concussion." Pomfrey corrected then handed Bianca a potion, "Make sure she drinks half of this at midnight and the other half at 4am. I will let her leave with you only if you promise to not let her do anything besides lay on a couch, a bed, or use the bathroom."

"Deal." Bianca said excitedly as she pocketed the potion.

"Let's go babes." Marco said as he picked her up bridal style.

"I love you Poppy you're the best!" Leo called out.

"Don't tell anyone. It'll destroy my reputation." Pomfrey replied. She was never the type to let students leave unless she was positive they were okay. But in the past six years of watching Leo play Quidditch, this was the first time she saw a smile on her face after a match. And Pomfrey didn't want to ruin it.

********

"No moving." Marco demanded as he sat her on her bed and Bianca went to grab her a change of clothes.

"Yes dad." Leo replied rolling her eyes then holding onto her head, "Ow why did that hurt?"

"You have a concussion dumbass." Bianca said rolling her own eyes.

"It didn't hurt earlier." Leo responded annoyed.

"Adrenaline most likely." Marco said thoughtfully, "It was hot though when you were flying with blood all over you."

"You have weird kinks." Leo laughed then grabbed her head again from too much movement.

"I'm also gay so." Marco joked.

"Okay this is cute." Bianca said holding up an outfit.

"You're lucky Pomfrey always cleans us off before taking care of us." Leo said lifting up her arms for Bianca to help change her outfit.

"Yeah you'd be sweaty as fuck otherwise." Marco nodded.

"And covered in blood." Leo added looking over at the bloodstained jersey Bianca took off of her.

"True." Bianca agreed. She dressed her in a long skirt and sweater then changed into a different outfit herself. Marco touched up Leo's makeup. It was the first game she let herself wear it- finally not afraid of being shamed by men on the team.

"It's not like sexy but it's comfortable. Solid 8.1." Leo said checking the fit Bianca chose for her. "I might fall asleep at the party, is that boring of me?"

"Yes." Marco agreed.

"You should've stayed at the infirmary if you were tired babes." Bianca scolded.

"Too late now." Leo responded disappointed.

Knock knock knock.

"That's probably Scorp." Leo said as Marco went to open the door.

"Why aren't you in the infirmary?" Scorpius demanded as he entered her room.

"Because party?" Leo responded innocently. "Pomfrey let me."

"You're so stupid."

"I'm under strict instructions not to move." Leo argued back.

"You shouldn't have even gone back to playing let alone not spending the night with Pomfrey."

"But we won." Leo said with a small smile.

"Yeah you did." Scorpius nodded with a laugh, "I guess I've never seen you happy after Quidditch."

"I had a good ass game." Leo said simply, "And so did my team. I'm proud of us."

"Awww." Bianca pouted, "I'm proud of you as well."

"So am I." Marco said squeezing her foot.

"Oh shush it." Leo replied embarrassed, "Where's my phone? Tab said someone took a picture of me all bloodied and I want to see it."

"Here." Bianca said pulling it out of Leo's gym bad that she retrieved before going to the infirmary.

Leo opened her phone and checked her messages from Tabitha. "Oh I look hot I'm posting this."

"Lemme see." Bianca said leaning over as Leo held the phone away from her.

"No you can check my post."

"No she won't." Scorpius said stealing her phone from her, "You shouldn't be on your phone with a concussion. Stupid bitch."

"Post it for me then." Leo begged.

"Fine what caption?" Scorpius said with a sigh.

"Whatever you want I don't care."

"Bet."

"Wait lemme take a picture of Leo now so you can show the world she's okay." Bianca said taking her phone.

"Just like take over my Instagram why don't you bruv." Leo joked as she posed for Bianca to take the picture.



liked by kinggeorge, dracodilfoy, and 9,264 others

gallileo broken nose doesn't stop me from slaying

comments

biancazabini HOT ASS BITCH
-> gallileo WOW THANKS BIANCA YOURE AMAZING
-> marcopolo are you rly responding to your own comment on leo's phone
-> gallileo yes ~ bianca

marcopolo bestie leads slytherin to another victory
-> kinggeorge airbag could never

freddiekrueger i wanna be leo when i grow up
-> gallileo looks like i'm going to be dating leo then
-> biancazabini that was me wrong phone ^^^

scorpion leo is still stupid for getting back on the broom ‼️
-> jamesnotcharles You just don't get the quidditch grind
-> scorpion you just don't get what a will to live is like

andresfaultline you scare me a bit
-> scorpion leo said "good keep it that way"- i confiscated her phone from bianca

dracodilfoy What happened?
-> scorpion bludger to the face- she's fine now
-> dracodilfoy Tell her to call me in the morning.
-> scorpion will do

astoriamalfoy pretty?
-> scorpion "I look hot" - leo's reaction to seeing the picture
-> astoriamalfoy of course it was, thanks for taking care of your sister
-> scorpion anytime

tabbycat YES CAPTAIN BROKEN NOSES ARE SEXY
-> scorpion don't encourage her

teamjacob WOOO THATS MY CAPTAIN
                  -> scorpion i do not know you
                  -> teamjacob montague
                  -> scorpion shit i didn't know you had a first name

marcusflint you guys got lucky
-> marcopolo oh he's bitter bitter

mels hydrogen peroxide gets out blood
-> scorpion she said she's dealing with it next year

poprox red is your color
-> scorpion "ew no that's gryffindor"

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//an

notha party chapter coming soon :)

love y'all <3

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