Author: I am Bismarck Zwei-less.
P.S
I royally screwed myself not realizing I've been uploading Chapter 2 and 3 into the wrong story.
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A heavy atmosphere surrounds the small group of METAs who have been inactive lately. Repulse META and Renown META share a nervous stare while Hunter META rolls her eyes while flipping a bullet up and down. All three META ships know very well the two META's sitting across each other are tightening the awkwardness.
"You showed up at the very end and didn't even do anything" Ark Royal META crosses her arms
"......." Bismarck META lifts her head
"Other than shooting King George V back then"
"......." Bismarck META remains silent
"Say something. You're making things more awkward than it should....."
"I feel like I would have escalated the situation if I interfered. My sister is an incomplete META, remember?"
"You already escalated it the moment you helped Victorious revive her. Unfortunately, that only ended with a walking corpse powered by the black wisdom cube" Ark Royal META bitterly reminds her
"I've caused much suffering out of the belief I could save her. From the beginning, I knew toying with the life of another has consequences, but Victorious couldn't accept Tirpitz's choice to die"
"There are countless movies showing why you shouldn't bring people back from the dead"
"The situation is resolved now. There are no more reanimated kansens here"
"Yet you're still here"
"The reason is obvious. No one can know that their Tirpitz is but a shell occupied by someone else"
Still listening to the conversation, Hunter META frowns at Bismarck META as the latter is seemingly unfazed or uncaring.
"I don't think this can be a secret forever. Someone might keep an eye on her or make her slip up" Renown META comments
"Even if you want to protect her secret, you can't get near her because of the Bismarck in this timeline" Repulse META reminds
"It's for the best. My sister has yet to fully forgive me because of my involvement"
Bismarck META closed her eyes, regularly reminding herself when she's forced to fight her rampaging sister.
"The best I can do is to protect her from the shadows. At least, I have to ensure she doesn't overdo herself because she still has a tendency to get carried away" Bismarck META stands up
"Their personalities are different. Even if it's not Victorious, someone will take notice" Ark Royal META scoffs
"Tirpitz is aware of that. She wanted a peaceful life, so she would do anything to keep it that way"
"Peace, huh. Can someone who couldn't die peacefully learn how to live in peace?"
"This is a start for her....." Bismarck META trusts her sister
Even when Ark Royal META is skeptical of what will happen, Bismarck META doesn't pause to doubt and even responds with a faint smile on her lips.
(That's right. I couldn't let her repeat the mistake.....)
Bismarck META's thoughts drift away for a few seconds, but inside her mind, time seems to stretch indefinitely when reflecting on her "past". The same past she couldn't save and forced to leave behind.
.......
There, in front of her, is her sister digging her fingers into the ground and clawing the concrete like sand. Tirpitz META who lost her life in battle breathes and moves once again. Rather than the relief of a new life, Bismarck is rendered speechless to hear her screams and fries of disbelief and horror.
"I.....why......ngh....!"
Tirpitz META stares at her shaking hands, certain that she's indeed conscious again and that it's still her.
(Why is she horrified?)
Rather than gratitude for being revived, Tirpitz META's chaotic mental state causes ice to spread around her. The gentle expression Tirpitz META always has completely vanishes upon her revival. Now, her younger sister's gaze towards her is one full of resentment and frustration.
"What have you done?!" Tirpitz META raises her hand and condenses cold air around that part
"Tirpitz, don't! I'm the one who asked her!" Victorious META grabs her hand
"You!"
"This isn't my sister......" Bismarck META mutters to herself
It's only now she realizes while it's indeed Tirpitz META's body with the same memories, the sister she remembered is mostly lost. To toy with the life of the deceased is a natural violation, so Bismarck META could only view the current result as the horrible consequence of playing God.
.......
Prior to being destroyed the first time, the forbidden method Bismarck META used to attempt in fully restoring Tirpitz stripped away a portion of the original Tirpitz and caused her to rampage. Much like hers, an enormous steel beast manifested. Unlike a fiery beast, hers is a glacial one.
"Victorious, what have we done.....?"
Bismarck META arrives only to meet the scene of the surface of the surrounding waters nearly frozen and ice protrusions piercing the base. As for the winged freezing beast, it snapped off a ship's hull between its jaws.
"The lack of a soul drove her into this monstrosity. My sister isn't someone who lavishes in violence......but it's as if her mind could only destroy until she's destroyed" Bismarck META tightly clenches her fists
"I asked you to do this, so it's not all your fault" Victorious META sheds a tear
"As the leader of Iron Blood.....and her older sister, I'll put her to rest by myself"
Bismarck META feels a sting in her chest seeing the sister she once knew reduced into someone angry and self-destructive. She steels herself at the sight of what she perceived as a twisted version of Tirpitz META as punishment for her selfishness to revive her.
"In the end I failed to cut her down....." Bismarck META mutters to herself
"What are mumbling about all of a sudden?" Ark Royal META tilts her head
"We just don't want to repeat mistakes. That's all....."
For a brief moment, Bismarck META is reminded of the opportunity she had to put down her sister in the past.
Iron Blood headquarters......
Tirpitz stares at the steaming hot brewed coffee, seemingly puzzled whether to immediately sip or wait till the steam fades after a few minutes. Then there's Graf Zeppelin being visibly confused since Tirpitz is somehow worried about the coffee.
"Tirpitz, this isn't the first time you had coffee. Besides, I thought you preferred brewed ones" Graf Zeppelin let out a content sigh after a sip
"......."
Of all the things, Tirpitz doesn't imagine sitting with Graf Zeppelin over a cup of coffee as the original her is rather distant even to her fellow Iron Blood ships.
(It's awkward because the one I know lost an arm because of me.....)
Tirpitz wants to shake her head to get rid of the thought, but she's minimizing her movements seeing how Graf Zeppelin is keenly observing her. She could only remind herself of the image of another Graf Zeppelin's arm freezing from her fingertips upon being in contact with the cold air Tirpitz emits.
"You still have two arms....." Tirpitz sighs in relief
"What?"
"Ah, no.....I was thinking of someone else......"
At the realization, Tirpitz gets carried away with her thoughts, she immediately takes a large sip of her coffee, forgetting it's still steaming hot.
"Hey, you'll burn your tongue-" Graf Zeppelin is late to remind
"It's not even that hot"
Tirpitz places the cup back down, the steam completely fading away as if every ounce of heat left the drink. It's a subtle and mundane use of Tirpitz's freezing temperature. Although she can emit Sub-Zero temperatures, as the owner, she can reduce it enough to just cool even boiling water.
"It's cold now....." Graf Zeppelin immediately touches the side of Tirpitz's coffee
"I mean, leave it for a while and it gets cold?" Tirpitz tries to make an excuse
"Right....."
Although Graf Zeppelin is baffled at how she could tell external coldness somehow cooled the drink, she ignores the thought before jumping to conclusions. Just like everyone else, Graf Zeppelin believes Tirpitz lost her ability to emit freezing air alongside the deceased META.
"Anyhow, I heard you sparred with Alabama. It's rare for you to be the proactive one" Graf Zeppelin clears her throat
"I got bored and agreed to it because she won't shut up" Tirpitz weakly grunts
"Like your previous friendly bouts, it ended in a tie.......but you went home looking like you got into a brawl"
"I was practicing control......"
Tirpitz tightly closes her eyes for a moment, somehow embarrassed at her difficulty with controlling her strength as she's not the type to hold back against anyone. Since her cord power is her freezing ability, she finds it challenging not to unleash it the slightest, which requires practice for her to remember concealing it all the time.
"Bismarck thought you got into a fight. Well, it's a friendly fight but still......." Graf Zeppelin is also worried
"I like a good warmup. Not doing anything will make me rusty"
"Even you can have this change......" Graf Zeppelin faintly smiles
"Huh?"
"You've been active and assertive lately. Usually, you wouldn't care if it doesn't bother you and now you're finding ways to make use of your free time"
"Well, nearly dying and getting possessed by another version of me tends to be.....life-changing"
It's true to a certain degree. Due to the reality Tirpitz faced and another one she has to face, parts of her changed over time. This time, Tirpitz learns to not live in that bitterness and resentment anymore in order to make peace with the second and possibly only chance she left in her life.
"Back then, did I really die......?" Tirpitz's tone becomes soft
"You mean after the whole incident?"
"Yes. During the one where I passed out for like two days"
"We initially thought you actually died. Your wisdom cube nearly broke apart if it wasn't for the sudden influx of energy that patched it together and repaired the damages"
"......."
(That's right. As soon as she ended, I didn't do anything for a while as if I was silent processing being alone again.....)
Tirpitz couldn't properly think of it as either mourning or grieving as learning to be in pain for someone's loss is a new process for her. Being deceased and trapped without a body of her own left her with resentment, so gaining life in exchange of another life is initially a nervous experience for her. Unfortunately, she wouldn't fully admit it out of her own level of pride.
"......" Tirpitz stares at her coffee
"Tirpitz?"
"Sorry. I just thought of what it feels like to live normally again"
"A month has passed already, you know"
"I'm just worried something might happen that will take it away again"
"It won't happen again. The enemy is dead and her accomplices are nowhere to be found" Graf Zeppelin confidently assures her
"Enemy....."
The sheer reminder of the "fool" who happily died at her hands only makes Tirpitz grit her teeth. After all the agony she's been through, Tirpitz still couldn't forgive her enemy.
"Is Bismarck still worried about me skipping my check-ups?" Tirpitz changes the topic
"Well.....yes. You've been well for a month, but none of us knows if you're free from any after effects"
"I've......been thinking about it too - whether I'm truly free or not" Tirpitz's voice could barely hide her hesitation
"....."
"Bismarck doesn't want to force me, but I know she's worried. I don't like other getting worried for my sake......so I'll take that check-up"
"This is a wise decision for your well-being, but I admit this sudden change of mind surprised me" Graf Zeppelin blinks twice
(No. I just need to observe Neumark since that one has been keeping a close eye on me)
It's only on the surface that Tirpitz feigns concern when she's more focused on how to remove a threat without harming them. All she could think is how remove Neumark's suspicion before it alarms Bismarck.
"Bismarck is trying her best to be an older sister to me. I don't want to act the old me who's stubborn and barely listens to others" Tirpitz continues to act as 'herself'
"I'm glad you two are at least trying to be sisters. Hmph, if neither of you changed after the incident a month ago, I would have forced the two of you in one room"
Graf Zeppelin claims, but Tirpitz isn't certain if she's being serious or not. She acts serious most of the time, that Tirpitz doesn't believe Graf Zeppelin isn't the type to make a lighthearted joke.
"I don't want the same incident to repeat, so I want to make sure it won't haunt me" Tirpitz clears her throat
"We're only fortunate that you managed to keep yourself alive even after we all thought your wisdom cube was beyond repair"
"Yes.....it looked like it was completely destroyed" Tirpitz averts her gaze for a second
"Don't do something reckless like that again. There's no telling you'd be lucky to survive it again" Graf Zeppelin frowns
"Yeah, I understand what I did was a bit impulsive.....and I don't want to take my chances again"
Tirpitz clutches her chest, sensing her wisdom cube reshaped in its prime after the last one is destroyed after the last of its strength has been expended. It's only through her help that the wisdom cube persisted for so long, but the reality she can only prolong it so much causes her to wrinkle her uniform.
Two days later....
Neumark squints her eyes and gently rubs them after a moment while Tirpitz raises an eyebrow in visible confusion as soon as she sits upright after the MRI-like machine scans her full body. As they're both awkwardly silent for a whole minute, only the faint sound of the wall clock ticking fills the room.
(That made me nervous. That so-called knight better pray this could be pulled off.....)
Tirpitz massages her left shoulder and exercises her left arm by slowly spinning them. Although she has taken the body as her own now, being aware of its origin still makes her somewhat uneasy when moving her limbs the slightest.
"Is everything.....alright?" Tirpitz carefully pushes herself away from the machine and stand straight
"No.....I'm just really surprised you suddenly scheduled an appointment the other day and actually came....." Neumark twitches the side of her lips
"I came here because you've been upset I'm avoiding my weekly check-ups"
"Well, yeah.....but....."
Tirpitz continues to be puzzled yet observant and slightly cautious of Neumark even if the latter is lowering her guard and genuinely confused herself.
"Tirpitz, why have you been avoiding weekly check-ups anyway?" Neumark does her best to remain calm
"I just feel uneasy having my wisdom cube scanned after nearly dying.....again" Tirpitz faintly groans
"Nearly dead, huh. When you were hurriedly brought to me, I actually thought you were dead on arrival. Your wisdom cube was cracked beyond repair and your vitals were flat"
"......" Tirpitz frowns
"I got scared because I thought you were clinically dead and by the next moment......your wisdom cube......."
As Neumark continues to describe the moment where Tirpitz loses consciousness after finishing off Victorious META, the repair ship refreshes her exact thoughts that day.
"Tirpitz, you pulled off what shouldn't be possible. Your wisdom cube - it's as if it's been replaced. I mean it's in top condition with no cracks or leaks-"
Neumark excitedly shares what she views as a miracle but stops when Tirpitz's initial calm and cold expression suddenly shifts to a dilated glare. The dark and grim expression only makes her mild hostility and displeasure obvious. A little more and she would have moved to rudely cut off Neumark's words.
"What do you mean.....by replaced?"
It only takes Tirpitz a few seconds to notice Neumark sweating nervously because of silent displeasure, so she takes a deep sigh and resumes her default stoic expression.
"I....I mean there's nothing else to describe it. One moment your wisdom cube is cracked and empty then all of a sudden it's in stable condition"
There's no detailed way for her to fully narrate how she panicked that day, desperate to keep Tirpitz alive or at least bring back her vitals. Her hands keep shaking as seconds pass and Tirpitz's wisdom cube remains inactive and unresponsive. In less than a minute, the monitor displays the crack disappearing and the wisdom cube filled with energy again.
"I don't know what happened. Back then, I felt like I was in a dream. I saw a backstabbing friend standing far away from me and......" Tirpitz grunts and stops
"And.....?" Neumark is too curious
"She smiled at me looking too content. I realized she's dead and I'm about to join her......then you electrocuted me back to life"
Tirpitz still recalls Victorious META's image standing in the plain of snow with her bare feet partially buried to the soft snow beneath them. The former friend who she successfully killed somehow waves at her and gently smiles in pure bliss. Tirpitz wouldn't admit it herself but her chest feels relieved seeing that it's how her former friend smiled before her suicidal death.
"I'm sorry about it. I needed to adjust the defibrillator to a level that would evoke any response from you" Neumark scratches her cheeks
"You did everything you could to save me back then"
"It's my job as a repair ship. Besides, I'm mostly responsible for your repairs back in the Atlantic, so I know every inch of you"
"......." Tirpitz furrows her eyebrows
"Not in a weird you! I meant I got to know you better after treating you several times!" Neumark frantically waves her hands
"Thank you for always taking care of me. I'm sorry, I never got to properly appreciate your efforts" Tirpitz genuinely smiles
"You've thanked me before and helped me occasionally, you know" Neumark approaches her
"I did?"
"You did. Tirpitz, is your memory getting dull off suddenly? You and Bismarck have sharp memories because you don't like forgetting your gratitude after all"
"Well, maybe my memory is failing me after nearly dying twice....."
Since Tirpitz isn't sure what excuse to use so her response comes out hesitant and awkward while she lightly rubs her chin.
"Still, surviving the whole event a month ago was a wake up call to fix things with both my sister and my loud friend" Tirpitz rubs her nape
"........" Neumark just widens her eyes
"What's the matter? It's like you saw a ghost"
"I just thought how scared I got when I thought you died" Neumark shakes her head
"Right....."
"Anyway, I'll deliver the results after twenty-four hours. Since you've been stable lately, I'm mostly certain your test results are as normal as ever"
Neumark dryly laughs while Tirpitz remains observant at how the repair ship is somewhat keeping her distant and barely containing her anxiety.
"You can continue your daily routine now. We just finished all the necessary examinations. At least, regarding your wisdom cube" Neumark hands over Tirpitz's cap back to her
"Do I need to come back here or.....?" Tirpitz puts it back on and grabs her cape
"No need for you to walk all the way back here. I'll just deliver the results to Bismarck since she requires me to do that to her"
"I see. Thank you for doing your job as always....I suppose....." Tirpitz slowly heads to the door
Tirpitz would have preferred to stay for a few minutes hoping to study Neumark through a casual conversation, but it's clear that Neumark wants to focus on her duty again as an Iron Blood repair ship.
"Tirpitz, I noticed ever since the incident a month ago, you've changed a bit. Your gaze is a bit sharper now and your tone is a bit melancholic" Neumark hurriedly says it before Tirpitz leaves
Right when Tirpitz is about to grab the doorknob, she pauses and frowns again, still wary of the harmless repair ship.
"Grief changes people. That's all I can say......"
Tirpitz doesn't bother to at least look at Neumark in the eye when her thoughts flash the moment she unintentionally took lives and couldn't even get rid of Victorious META in her memory.
"......."
Before Neumark could say something in the last second again, Tirpitz quietly leaves, still refusing to even glance at Neumark. It's her instinct to do so as her gaze softens her face relaxes, refusing to acknowledge that there's still sorrow and frustration swelling in her heart.
"I'm certain she's Tirpitz, but why would she need to lie?"
As soon as Tirpitz's footsteps quickly fade away, Neumark collapses her rear down to her chair, finally letting loose more of her confusion and sudden realization.
"I need to know what's happening to her. First, she looked like she was about to attack. Then, she actually tried lying to me......"
Neumark is aware of Tirpitz's behavior as someone who witnessed the battleship's side beyond the cold and unapproachable persona. She's not afraid, but more nervous and worried about Tirpitz's wellbeing knowing the latter isn't the type to open up about her personal issues and troubles.
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Chapter 04: Victorious insists Tirpitz to spend more time, but Victorious senses Tirpitz is hiding something. Meanwhile, Neumark reports normal findings to Bismarck, but she suspects more there's something that meets more than the eye.