A/N: its here friends! The multipart story I promised a few weeks ago. I'm not sure how long this will be, I'm finishing chapter 7 right now. They're pretty long chapters. I will give a TW for assault now. This story contains discussions of Sexual Assault. Its not gone into detail, but it is discussed. Please don't read if you aren't in the place to. Your mental health should come first. Love you all!
Prologue:
3rd person POV:
Sitting on the small couch located on the side porch with a mug of sleepy time tea Sirius had made her and a blanket, Edaline Albrecht gazed out to the Sea infront of her, located just below the cliff her house sat on. The wind blew against her face, eyes glazed over and empty, almost as if she were dead. She felt like a zombie, though maybe she didn't look the part. Her messy dirty blonde hair was pulled back into a lazy pony tail, she was dressed in a t-shirt so big it swallowed any figure she had, and a pair of shorts. Shorts had been a big step for her since the incident last week. She felt completely and utterly alone. Sirius was there for her, Sirius and her friend Ryan. They were the only ones who knew. She couldn't even bring herself to say it out loud. But she allowed them to use legillimancy to see her mind, though, only the parts she could stomach, which wasn't a lot. She had gotten good at blocking out things she didn't want to think about. Never mind that. She hated that it haunted her. Sirius was with her all the time now. Ryan came when she could. The Order of the Phoenix was up to their necks in work right now but since Sirius was "technically" on house arrest, he couldn't do anything. He was permitted to visit Edaline as he pleased as she was a member of the Order of the Phoenix. She loved him for being her rock right now, but she could hardly think anything, let alone speak. A splash of rain against her cheek brought her back down to earth momentarily. It was a stormy day, typical in Ireland, though this time of year was supposed to be nice. It's the best time to travel here, according to every tourist who visited. But it was as if the earth had known how much she was suffering and made the weather reflect her mood. She had been so lost in thought she didn't notice Sirius sitting next to her, his own mug of tea in his hands. Nor did she hear his words.
"You in there sunshine?"
The nickname snapped her out of her daze completely.
"Sorry, what did you say?" she asked quietly, still facing the ocean in front of her.
Sirius bit back a sad sigh and instead reached out his hand to find hers, knowing she would take it if she was ready. She wasn't. But she turned to him and forced a tiny smile. Sirius felt a pang of sadness in his chest. Edaline always used to smile. That's where he got her nickname from. Edaline exuded sunshine to everyone around her, her smile could lift anyone's spirits. Her hazel eyes that were once full of life were now dull and filled with pain. Void of the joy they once held. Instead of faking a smile back to her, he gave her a knowing look that said so much while saying nothing at all.
"I asked if you're sure you should go back to Hogwarts like this. I know you love teaching but you're going through a lot. A type of pain no one should ever have to endure. I know Minnie will understand if you need to take a year off." he said softly.
Edaline shook her head, knowing where this discussion was going. She couldn't do this. She couldn't explain this to anyone else right now. She couldn't be weak.
"I can't. No one else is qualified to teach Alchemy, besides, I need a distraction. If I took a year off, all it would do for me is give me more time to fall further down until I go beyond rock bottom. I need my students just as much as they need me." she paused and tentatively reached for his hand, giving it a squeeze when she finally took it. "But I appreciate you're worried about me. There's still two weeks left of the summer holiday before classes start, that ought to give me time to get my shit together." she flashed him a weak smile.
Sirius returned it this time. It wasn't fake this time. Maybe a bit forced, but it was a hint at the sunshine he missed so dearly.
They sat in silence for what felt like hours, just watching the waves crash against the shore, but Sirius was content with that as his friend never let go of his hand. It was a silent reassurance that she was still in there. His friend who loved hugs just a week prior. His friend who loved snuggle piles on the couch with Remus, Tonks, and himself. His friend who saw the good in everyone, no matter what terrible things they had done.
"A brutal lesson to learn." He thought. "Some people are truly evil, and there is no good left to look for."