ELIZA
Returning to school seemed more daunting than I assumed it would be. After being absent for two weeks, I had foreseen some gossiping, but having Jasper interact with me at every chance he got, certainly raised a few eyebrows. Riya and Zayn were definitely two of them. It wouldn't be a lot, maybe the odd smile here and there, but it was certainly more attention than when he had 'despised' me.
"Have you got him on a leash or something?" Zayn asks, playing with the pencil in his hands as he looks at me with a strained smile on his face.
For the past few weeks, I had not been in contact with Zayn. I had ignored all texts, in fact, from anyone at school - other than Riya. I think being alone in solitude was a sort of mental reset that I needed, to be able to recharge my social battery, and return to how I was before.
"I can't, he's being so irritating," I groan, bringing my arms down in front of me as I lean my head on to the desk.
He raises an eyebrow, "I must say, for someone who hated him for the past two terms, you sure don't seem to mind his company."
I bring my head up resting it on the palms of my hand, "I guess you can say we're now... civil? There's no more hatred or anything of that sort between us."
"What kind of Christmas miracle did you two encounter, I feel like I'm in some hallmark movie."
"I don't think you can call this a miracle," I purse my lips, "Just an understanding of sorts."
He hums in response, and we lapse into a moment of silence as we continue listening to our chemistry teacher. Although his questions seemed as though they were out of genuine curiosity, there was something distasteful underlying his tone, something I was willing to ignore, because he's my friend.
"Hey," His whisper, guide my attention back to him, "Why weren't you in for the past few weeks?"
I look down for a moment, before returning to face him, "I had this really shit fever, and a stomach bug to top it all off."
The lie falls off my tongue, I didn't want anyone else finding out what I had gone through in the past few weeks, how low I really got, and how fragile my mind was. It was easier this way.
He scrunches his face in distaste, "Ooof, that sounds rough."
"Trust, it was."
Once class finishes and we return to our study hall for our free period, Zayn decides to stay with me. In all honesty I was worried about how my relationship with Zayn would be affected if I had befriended Jasper. Their discontent towards each other was of the same level, but the key difference was that Jasper was the type of person to not care. As long as there is an established relationship, the opinions of others do not matter, his own judgement is stronger.
However with Zayn, he was already very open with his displeasure towards Ezra. I didn't fail to forget the way he had reacted at the ice rink, when he had seen us alone. He was worried about me, but I am more than aware that a tiny portion of him still didn't want me to associate with Jasper because of their relationship - or lack thereof.
I guess you could say he was territorial, in a sense.
As off putting as that is, I understand that their strained relationship comes with a loaded history, there is no doubt that both believe they are in the right. If I consider myself unlucky I could say that their hatred could bring misfortune for me - someone who stands in their crossfire.
However, at the end of the day, I am my own person, I am more than capable of deciding who I want to associate with, and even though Zayn may show his dissatisfaction due to his own worries, it is my call to make. I just worry it will come at the price of our friendship.
-
The last bell had rang five minutes ago, but students only seemed to be leaking into the class right now. It was fifth period and in my maths class, with my not so secret admirer seated beside me. Even though this entire day I had seen him from every corner of the school, the presence of other students had made me feel a bit more at ease.
Which is why I wasn't ready for the feeling of awkwardness to seep throughout the entire lesson we had been together.
As the teacher continued with the explanations on the bored, I played with the highlighter in my hand, twisting and turning it between my fingers. I was too distracted to pay attention to the lesson.
I could hear the soft exhale of Jasper's breath, and the small tapping sounds the drumming of his fingers made. I glance sideways, noticing how his head was rolled back, and facing the ceiling. His eyes were closed, and those chocolate lashes fanned beneath his eyelids.
My mind wanders back to the moment we shared under the snow at the ice rink, the way his face held a small glow as his eyes searched into he depths of my own. Both of our hearts racing in trepidation, who would make the next move? How would this moment end? It was truly an enchanting moment.
I'm not sure if this is my lack of romantic experience talking, or if I honestly did like him the way I believe I was. But I've never had someone pay attention to me or apologise so deeply for me before. I've never felt so giddy about such normal interactions between two people. Of course I've had crushes, but most times, they were people who were out of my reach, someone who wouldn't even spare a glance at me.
Jasper was the only person in such close proximity, that I've felt my heart lift for.
I catch myself constantly thinking about him, imagining what he would think about, what he likes, what he doesn't like.
My thoughts echo his name, constantly.
Lost in my thoughts, I failed to notice his left arm reaching out the the side of my chair. His fingers clamp around the plastic, just as I break my stare away from him. I have no time to question what he was going do, his arm bends, and the grasp of his hands, drives my chair sideways, closing the distance between us. The carpet below us muffles the sounds of the chair dragging across the floor. I bite back the yelp that rises in my mouth and knock into his side from the jerky movement.
"You can look closer now." He mumbles, eyes closed and head still leant back.
I scoff, and seize the sides of my chair, shuffling away form him.
But once more, his hand jumps out and pulls my chair towards him.
"If you don't want too, at least let me use those broad shoulders to rest my head." He whispers, lowering his head.
I notice the small smile on his face, as he lowers the left side of his face on to the top of my shoulder, bringing his hair to tickle the crook of my neck. I open my mouth to protest, but leave it agape for a moment. The scent of his shampoo seep through my nose, and instantly all objections die in my throat.
I was certain he could feel the spike in my pulse, my eyes were fixed on the dark tussle of hair that feathered my cheeks. I reject the urge to swipe my fingers through his locks, to feel the smooth feeling of his hair run under my fingers.
I noice his shallow breathing once more, watching closely as his chest uses and falls, and the sudden twinge of pink that paints his cheeks.
If I held his face in my palms, would his cheeks warm my fingers, or be cool under my hot touch?
I blink, and force my attention back on to the teacher, who still had not noticed Japser's lack of awareness in her class. Although, I wouldn't be surprised of she had chosen to ignore it completely, there is nothing she can say to him to make him comply with her demands. If he didn't want to, he simply wouldn't.
But what he did want, was to to rest on my shoulders.
———
Hey guys,
I hope you enjoyed today's chapter! I apologise for the late update! I have a legitimate reason, I promise. The screen of my laptop has been damaged, meaning I can't see anything right now. I had to wait for my HDMI cable to arrive, so it's mirrored on to my monitor, which is why I've been a bit late with this update. Anyway, please remember to vote and comment on this chapter!
Thank you,
Elle x