Chapter 11
Cassi's POV
I was sprawled on the floor next to mark, oh god how I've missed him. My best buddy, my brother, "You have no idea how much I missed you."
"I take it alot? Haha since you pretty much tackled me. Help me up, seriously is it me or are you getting heavier?"
"Its just you, I've lost weight" i giggled and rolled off of him, but ended up hitting my head on the floor. "ouchi" I rubbed the back of my head, it felt warm like a million ants were crawling on it. I checked my hand "No blood, yay."
"Seriously your proud of that? How many times have you cracked your head open?"
"Twice?....maybe three times, not exactly sure. But one was your fault, you made me laugh so much I slipped."
"And who told you to hang upside down?"
"You said I couldn't drink my juice like that, so I was proving you wrong! So it's your fault," I teased.
"Hey Cas, what's all the, oh hey Mark." it was Seth standing by the door, I had been trying to avoid him lately, he's been acting strange.
Cades POV
God she was sprawled out next to him, giving him moony lovestruck eyes, giggling at everything he said
'Cade it's her brother calm down she's just talking to him. Keep it together man.' I heard John in our mental link.
'She's mine'
"Hey Cas, what's all the...oh hey Mark ." it was Seth, cassis friend.
I walked over to Cassi and lifted her up, placing her behind me. 'She needs to know who's in charge. Who she belongs to.'
"I don't remember letting you in. You know that's a criminal offence."
"Dont worry," he grinned cockily, "I got permision from the man on top."
'Ahh so this was the wolf who'd asked permission to cross into our territory.' I didn't think I'd get the chance to meet him. He was an Alpha too, leader of over most of California , a mighty impressive feat for someone so young.
He stood up and brushed off his clothes. Cassi walked over to him, wrapping her arms around his waist. I wanted to scream and throw things, I wanted to beat the crap out of this guy, I wanted to toss Cassi on my bed, make her mine. I wanted....I growled. 'This girls making me crazy.'
"Cassi," I called out
"Mark I can." He began to straighten her clothes
"Stop trying to think you can hide it you fool."
"Hide what." She looked up at him wide eyed and confused.
"Its plain to see Cas, did you think someone wouldn't notice?!"
"What are you-"
"Cassi don't play dumb."
He turned her around and pulled her hair. It was silent we all heard the click; Cassi's hair fell, he pulled on another row, she tried to pull away but he held her firm.
"Let her go." I couldn't take anymore, I wasnt standing by to let some male touch her, let alone hurt her.
"Stupid idiot!" she screamed, and tried to grab at him. "Why can't you be an oblivious twit like everyone else. Why can't you fucking....why can't you...." I had my arms wrapped around her waist, it was hard to hold on she turned, sqirmed, tried to crawl from my hold. She stopped fighting, soft sobs and whimpers formed on her lips. It was horrible to hear my mate cry, she looked up at me with big teary eyes, my hold on her waist laxed, and she used it as an escape. She lunged at mark , knocking him to the ground, she was growling at him, literaly growling. Her hands were pinning him to the ground. "Oh god mark, you can't keep your mouth shut." she sobbed, she was shaking, I'm not sure if it was in anger, or because of the adrenaline leaving her body.
"Come on we need to talk,"Mark scooped her in his arms and took her outside. I was following them, but something stopped me. I looked up, it was dad, 'when had he come in?' god I was transfixed on Cassi, I couldn't focus on anything.
"But!" I protested, but decided against finishing it after the hard look he gave me.
Cassis POV
Mark had set me down behind some horse stalls, he gave me a look and i knew I couldn't Not say anything. He'd know if I lied, he always knew.
"So what happened to your hair, and don't Think you can tell me some BS story, about how you wanted a change or got bored, I know you better than that Cass. You love your hair you would never ever cut it all off."
I pushed back the hair from my face with a trembling hand, it was a short bob now after 2 years of growth, what had once been beautiful long light brown hair that fell in soft curls well passed my hips.
"Jared cut it off," oh god, he knows now.
"Why would he do that, wait Jared so this hapened over a year ago?"
"2 years," I mumbled softly, I was so ashamed of it. "He....he got mad that I let Seth braid my hair one night, that he...he.....he" I couldn't finish, it was horrible to think of him like that. 'Jared was sweet, he loved me.'
"He.....walked me home, but along the way we stopped, and he pushed me to the ground. He told me he didn't want anyone at all touching me. That-that I was his. He pulled out his knife, and cut it as close to my skin as possible, he was marking me as his, that's what he told me, that I was his and no one else should ever touch me." I cried, I could still hear the quiet rustling crunch of the knife cutting through hair. I could taste fear, ever so vile in the back of my throught. I was so afraid, him over me holding that knife, the cold look in his eyes as he smiled down at me 'Your mine Cassi no one touches what's mine.'
Marks hand touched my shoulder and I flinched away. The hurt in his eyes made me look at the floor in shame.
"Was this the only time he hurt you Cassi?" His voice was cold, deadly.
I kept my eyes on the floor, I couldn't look at him, I didn't want to see the disgust in his eyes.
"I wish I could get my hands around his neck, I'd-" His voice was cold, beyond furious.
"I loved Jared, Mark." There was a tone of desperation in my voice, "I still do, I have to stop thinking about him, it's making me sick. He's gone, and he's not coming back. I know that but....Even though I know it's wrong, in a sick twisted way I want him back." I sobbed, I missed him so much.
"Cassi, you poor thing. You know it's wrong to keep loving him, but you still do." he wrapped his arms around me, giving me the affection that I so deperatly needed. "How did I not see it baby ?" He hugged me tighter, "He was my best friend I trusted him to take care of you." His voice broke.
"Im sorry for yelling at you Mark." I placed my hand on his cheek, brushing away stray hair from his face, he had unshed tears in his eyes. "Your always here for me when I need you."
"Of course I am, that's what big brothers are for Cassi." He kissed the top of my head
"I need a minute Mark , alone, I'll be inside in a minute to say goodbye to everyone."
"Take your time," He ruffled my hair as he walked away.
I sat down as he walked away, getting to work uncliping the extentions, my head felt so much lighter I couldn't help shaking it. I missed the slight touch of my long hair against my arms when I shook my head like this.
Out of the corner of my eye I saw a scruffy brown dog, hiding behind the barn. It was huge and had big blue eyes, It was a malamute from the look and size of it.
"hey there," he looked up at me curiously, like he was surprised I had spotted him. "Come here," I cooed, "Your so cute, come give me a kiss." I tapped my cheek giving the same hand sign I gave with my dogs. He padded over quietly, his eyes never drifting from mine. "Come On, I won't hurt you."
He stopped about 3 feet from me, his eyes unwavering. He had inteligent calculating eyes, so unlike my dogs. My dogs had bright, energetic eyes that sparkled with curiosity and playfullness.
I crowched down to pet him, my eagerness to meet a new friend making my hand shake. "See I'm not going to hurt you." I ran my hand down his back, but he didn't wag his tail like my dogs. He acted as if he was too serious, too angry to do so.
"Hey Mr. grumpy" he nudged my hand with his mouth, pushing it away. "So I take it you don't like me huh? It's alright I don't really like myself most of the time either." I rubbed his head leaving his hair all mussed, "Can I tell you a secret, mr. Grumpy? I've done alot of things that I'm not proud of, alot of things that really hurt me. But the worst part is that I don't think what I did was that bad, i don't regret any of it. I don't think...that I won't try it again."
I ran my fingers through his soft fur, "only Seth knows what I did, not Mark, not even my parents know. He..he's the one that saved me. If it wernt for him having caught me swallowing all those pills, then...I wouldn't be here. If it would have been anyone else who'd have caught me then I...I' don't even know."
He put his head on my lap, and whined. It was so horrible to see someone else suffer for what I've done. "Hey Mr. Grumpy I'm supposed to be the sad one not you." tears were running down my already damp cheeks, I loved crying it didn't hurt, it was like a bit of sadness fell away with each tear.
Cade's POV
God hearing my mate admit that those scars on her wrists weren't the only damage self inflicted, but that shed really tried to kill herself, I, I felt like I had failed her. Failed her for not being there to take care of her, To make her smile, and god, from the sounds of it I'm just as domineering and possessive as that Jared guy.
It made me think, maybe I'd hurt her in a rage of anger, I'd be no better than him. Cassi deserved someone who'd make her smile, and laugh, make a good father for her children, not a controling alpha.
"You a great listener Mr. grumpy."She sat up and gave me a hug, I could hear her heartbeat, pounding ever so softly. "you know I have a cute little wolfie mix too, you might like her, she's a red wolf. You two would have cute puppies together, I like puppies," she sniffled. "Almost as much as I love babies, at...at least i can have puppies, babies are harder to get." she broke down again, but these sobs were devastatingly heartbreaking.
It seemed like the world was ending, she wasn't really breathing. She buried her face in my fur, I could feel my fur getting damp with her tears, her ragged breaths, as small as they were, I could feel against the damp skin. "Oh god, I'm sorry Mr. Grumpy, I really am, I'm just such a mess. I don't even know how it got this bad I wish I was still a little girl, when all I cared about was baseball and mud. Since my hormones kicked in all I can think about is babies. Of how I want my own family, a baby boy or girl to hold in my arms, and rock to sleep." I pictured her stomach round with our child, rocking a little girl to sleep in her arms, with a joyful smile. My heart sped up at the thought, I was eager to start a family with her, although I had never thought about kids.
" My brothers are starting families of there own already, and I can't stand being around them too long. It makes me feel bad, because I want what they have. And I hate how they can have what I most want, what I'll never...have. Who wants damaged goods anyways."
What she thought was damaged I still wanted to worship, to spend my life worshiping. She was beautiful, with a sparking personality. A great cook from what I'd tasted, and she wanted kids, a family. She seemed perfect to me, the more I thought about it, the more it seemed I had a perfect mate, one I wasn't worthy of.