Her heart stuttered as she stared down at her daughter who's expression was a mixture of shock, incredulity and confusion. Confusion seemed to be the dominant.
Em immediately went close to her, kneeling down on one knee in front of her. "Hey, sweetie. Why are you here?" She asked in a sweetly controlled voice, even while her voice wanted to tear up with the angst. Her daughter only stared back at her with a hint of. . . accussation?
"Why aren't you answering, dear?" Her voice shook with the panic building inside her.
"Hey there, little Amy." Zain was beside her, also on one knee, obviously wanting to try his luck. "You missed me?"
Amy only shook her head timidly, staring at Zain with a hint of. . . wariness? Em's heart raced against her chest furiously. Just how much had her daughter seen and how much did her infantile mind grasp and understand?
"Amy, can you do me a favour?" Zain suddenly asked the three year old with a smile that she barely returned if she did at all. "You see, there is something very important that I need to discuss with your mother. Can you please excuse us?"
"What are you-" Em started to protest, but before she could, her daughter practically run out of the room. She sprang to her feet, ready to go and offer any placating justification, but before she could step out, Zain held her by the wrist. She glared at him angrily.
"What the fuck is wrong with you? My daughter just saw me kissing a man who isn't her father. I need to go and speak to her."
"Come on, Em. She's just a child. She probably didn't think much if it." Zain assured with wavering confidence.
"Didn't think much of it?" She tried to unclamp Zain's hand from her wrist with her other hand. "My daughter might be a child, but she is not naive enough to forget that this is something mummy does with only daddy."
Abruptly, Zain pulled her back and shut the door before turning the locks. "You aren't going to use this as an excuse to escape this discussion. I won't let you do that."
The soberness in his eyes finally made her control snap, and she held him by the collar with wild incense for his disregard of her feelings. "What the hell do you want? Why do you want to destroy my life?"
Anger flashed through his eyes just as he clenched his jaw, seemingly infuriated as well. "I'm not trying to destroy your life. I'm merely trying to secure a future of happiness for you. You know I love you."
"I never told you I was unhappy. And don't you dare speak of love because you clearly know nothing of it. If you truly love me, you will leave me alone to be happy with George."
"But I know you aren't completely happy. No one else can make you as happy as I can make you." He reached out to cup her cheek, his touch eliciting a shrill feel on her skin. "Listen, I know you're conflicted because you're suddenly realizing your love for George as the illusion it is. But you really have to accept that the man you truly love is me."
"You have no right to tell me what I feel. They are my feelings and emotions. And I know them well enough to know that the only thing I feel for you right now is utter revolt."
She wished it were true, but right now, her emotions were so jumbled there seemed no way of ordering them. They tore her apart inside.
Zain was suddenly pulling her close by the waist to his hard body. "This is exactly what I mean. You're so scared to admit your love for me even if it's so manifested in your gaze no matter how you try to camouflage it."
She attempted go push him back by the chest, but his hard muscles and bones refused to budge. "I'm not afraid of anything and I'm not camouflaging anything. Because I don't love you. The only man I love is George. He's the man I've been in love with for four years now, the one I want to spend the rest of my life with. I wouldn't have married him if I didn't love him."
Ever since she realized that she was in love with George, that'd been her dreams about the future. The dreams had been consistent until Zain's return, until she could no longer even dream about the future and everything looked so bleak and uncertain.
"How do I know that your marriage to George is not a marriage of convenience?" He suddenly questioned, letting go and stepping away from her.
"What the hell do you mean by that?"
"Now that I think of it, the two of you met at an emotional support group therapy. You both had similar past situations which ended up traumatizing you in similar ways. I remember you being afraid to give love a chance because of your fears."
"The same probably goes for him. So when you two met, you saw the perfect opportunity to plunge out of the love-encumbered life you two lived. How do I know that your relationship is probably more of a contract since each one of you was assured of emotional safety?"
At that analysis and question, and his flagrant basement of her marriage, Emma felt indignation pinch at her heart, and before she lost the nerve, she slapped him furiously. "How dare you call my marriage to George a contract marriage. My love for him is more significant than anything I could've had for you, and his is more than anything you could've ever offered. That is why I married him."
Zain's head which had been titled by the slap, straightened, a hard gleam of relentlessness in it's owner's eyes. Her heart pounded as she anticipated his next move.
Before she knew, Zain had her in his arms, his hand travelling to the back of her head as he kissed her forcefully. She tried to struggle, but the more he kissed her, the more the emotions took their toll on her and she weakened. She didn't kiss him back, but she was much too weary to resist either. Until he started untying the belt of her bathrobe.
The reality of where this could lead her came tumbling hard on her, granting her some kind of heart pounding adrenaline which enabled her to use all her might to push him. He stumbled but didn't fall, and she slapped him again before he could emerge from the shock of her push.
"What the hell do you take me for? A fucking whore?" She felt appalled by how lowly he thought of her. "Do you think that I'm so shameless that I'd cheat on my husband? Most especially in our matrimonial bed?"
"There's nothing wrong with surrendering for love."
"I never said I love you. It's high time you get it into your head that I don't love you. My heart already has an owner, and that's George Lancaster." she shouted.
Zain made no attempt to stop her as she unlocked the door and stepped out. Surely, he wouldn't want to cause a scene in front of her aunt downstairs.
In a split second, her back was crushed against the wall, and as she gasped, she met Zain's stone-cold gaze boring into hers, freezing every fibre in her body into ice of frigid dread.
"You just keep on trying to fight what's in our destiny. We're destined to be together, and no one can separate us." He said, his voice menacing. He was seriously beginning to sound like a psychopath. "But I guess you aren't going to accept your love for me and our fate that easily. Very well then, if you want war, then war you'll get."
He pulled her head hard into a rough kiss, then let go off her, stepping back, glaring at her before storming off. Her head whirled from the wave shock of rival emotions frolicking in her being, and she pressed hard against the tough war to keep from falling.
...if you want war, war you'll get.
What did he mean by that? Would he tell George about them and demand a truce to win her love like she saw in movies? How would George react? Sure; she hadn't cheated on George, but how would he feel about her hiding the history that she shared with Zain from him?
God this was such a freaking mess.
Dragging in a deep breath, Emma tried to tell herself that Zain's words hadn't instigated any more doubts than the bits there already were. However, for the first time ever, she wondered if love was truly the reason she and George had rushed into marriage four years ago.
Just as she managed not to cry, and remembered her daughter, the confusion on her face after she'd seen her and Zain kissing, she heard footsteps. She figured it was her aunt and steadied herself to avoid questioning.
But the woman's question came from behind, so grave in tone that it sent a jolt down Emma's back. "What is going on between you and that man?"
She whirled around to face her aunt. "Me and who? I don't understand you aunt."
"Don't try to deceive me. I saw the two of you kissing."
Oh, God.