Friday night for Steve meant a trip to Melvald’s and a sleepover with Robin at his apartment. It had been more or less routine for at least three years at this point and today was no exception. He parked outside her apartment building just before sunset and waited. He always picked her up at the exact same time, but she always managed to forget.
“Ya know, you could just drive yourself to my place,” he sighed once she had set her bag in the back and taken her spot in the passenger seat.
“And miss out on these precious bonding moments with you, my loving husband?”
“Shut up,” he groaned. “I still can’t believe he thought that."
"You can't believe it? What about me?" She cried, hands flailing around her. "He doesn't even know me and he just assumed I have bad taste."
"Oh, you don't have bad taste?" Steve asked accusingly. "Did you really already forget about the great Amanda debacle of '89? Hmm?"
Robin turned in her seat to stare at him, her eyes wide. "Okay, first of all, that was a low blow."
"I'm sorry," he answered, not sorry at all.
"And second of all, why are we bringing up my dating history when you're the one who still has a crush on the same guy five years later but you still refuse to do anything about it?"
Steve was quiet now. His lips drew into a tight line as his eyes shifted to his side mirror. The only sound in the suddenly silent car was the click of his turn signal. Robin sighed as he turned left off of her street towards the grocery store in the center of town.
"I'm sorry," she told him quietly. "That was too far. I know you're going through like, a thing about it or whatever." He was still quiet, focused on the road. "Forgive me, Stebie," she pouted, jutting out her bottom lip and opening her blue eyes wide as she stared at him.
"Don't call me that," he told her. "And I'm not going through a thing, okay. I just- I just don't know."
The rest of the ride to the store was quiet. Robin watched houses pass her by through the windshield. She knew better than anyone what Steve was going through, and she also knew why he was handling it the way he was. Telling someone that you have feelings for them is tough. It’s even tougher when that person is the same gender as you, putting yourself at risk.
The pair made their way around the busy grocery store fairly quickly, having perfected their route over weeks of practicing. Robin went left to grab chips and cookies. Steve went right to get drinks and candy. Then they’d meet at the register and make small talk with Gerald while he rang them out. It was a pretty good system if you asked either of them.
Once they were back at Steve’s small, sparsely decorated apartment they laid out their haul in the living room. Robin pulled a tape from her bag and set it on top of the TV to be put in when they were ready.
“Seriously?” Steve asked with a groan when he caught the cover of the tape out of the corner of his eye. “Grease? Fucking again?”
“Olivia Newton-John is stupid hot at the end and you know it,” she defended.
“So I have to sit through the entire stupid thing so you can crush on her for the last five minutes?”
Robin stopped what she was doing and turned to face him. “You like the movie, too. I know you do. Every time I pick it you’re over there singin’ your little heart out.” Steve felt a warm blush fall over his cheeks as he shook his head at the accusation. “Yeah, exactly. So quit crybabying and order the food. Please.”
Robin changed into sweats and one of Steve's shirts while he called Chang's. Tyler, the owner's son, knew their order by memory. All Steve had to say was "Hey, man," and Tyler was telling him with a laugh that his cousin would be there in 10.
Robin was right. Steve did secretly like Grease. He shimmied his shoulder against hers during Summer Nights. He sang along to the men's parts, using the ends of his chopsticks as a microphone. Robin laughed along before taking up her part of the duet. Steve's small living room was filled to the ceiling with music and laughter. It was nice. Nice enough that he was almost able to forget their conversation in the car.
It was Hopelessly Devoted To You that did him in. The moment the sad music started and Sandy stepped out into the dark in her nightgown the energy in the apartment shifted. Steve pulled his eyes away from the screen. His smile fell as he stared at his own hands in his lap.
Robin moved on the couch beside him. She shuffled into his side, resting her head against his shoulder. "Are you ever gonna tell him?" She asked.
"Don't think so," he answered.
"Why not?"
"You really think it matters now?" He asked. "Guys got a kid. Clearly I'm not his type."
"You don't know that," Robin offered. "You won't really know anything unless you try."
Steve took a deep breath. The song was coming to an end. Sandy was making her away around the small yard as she poured her heart out in song. An image of Danny Zuko appeared in the reflection of the pool. His little smirk reminded Steve of Eddie.
She was right. He knew she was right. She knew it, too. But she didn't press any further. The question loomed in the back of his mind through the rest of the movie. Are you ever gonna tell him?
He'd thought about it. A lot, actually. That first day he saw Eddie mopping the floor at the little truck stop outside of town. It took everything in him not to grab him by the shirt and kiss him until his lungs gave out. It was like the universe was saying "here he is! This is your second chance you thought you'd never get! Don't waste it!"
And sure, maybe he was afraid. Maybe he was being a coward by not making a move. He told Robin that he was just waiting for the right moment. In reality he was waiting for Eddie to say something first. It sounded crazy, really. Steve Harrington afraid to make the first move. Younger Steve would have never waited. Younger Steve was full of confidence and had more than a few notches in his belt. But that hadn't been the case in a long time. Not since Eddie had caught his eye in 1986.
Steve knew he liked guys fairly young. Danny Clark had been the one to awaken that particular side of him in the eighth grade. But he liked girls more. He figured Danny was a fluke. A one off sort of appreciation for an attractive guy. So he didn't do anything about it. He spent a few weeks freaking out, listening to his dad call guys like him horrible names and inwardly flinching every time.
But Eddie was different. Eddie had always been different. When he'd shown up on the first day of their junior year with shaggy hair and a Megadeth shirt with a hole in the armpit, Steve knew Eddie was different.
Steve spent that year with Nancy Wheeler. He did come to love her. He loved her a lot, actually. More than she loved him, it turned out. But the only reason she'd even gotten on his radar to begin with was because she looked just enough like Eddie. He'd never admit that. Not to Eddie or Nancy or Robin. Not even to himself. But anyone with eyes could see the physical similarities if they'd bother to look.
Nancy broke his heart a year later, a few months into his senior year. Steve spent the rest of that year quietly watching her love Jonathan the way he'd wished she'd love him. But she didn't, and he couldn't blame her for that. Not really. Not when he knew that she was happier now.
So he'd graduated and tried to move on. He took to going to The Hideout on the outskirts of town in hopes of outrunning Hawkins High. And it worked. It worked for about a month. It worked until he stepped through the doors on a Tuesday night right in the middle of some bands' set.
The music was awful. It was too loud and the band playing it sounded like a bunch of kids who didn't know how to play their instruments. He ordered a beer from the guy behind the bar and turned to watch the band behind him. The moment he faced the stage felt like a freight train had driven straight through his chest.
There he was. Eddie Munson. He was a little older. His hair was a little longer. He was dripping sweat as he banged his head to the song he was playing. And just like that, Steve was hooked once again.
Only this time, he didn't run away. This time he has a reason to be around Eddie. Corroded Coffin became his favorite band. When he found out they had a weekly gig at the dirty little bar, he became a regular. He got to know the bartenders by name. He got introduced to Eddie's bandmates. He got to keep his crush and keep his mouth shut. It was a perfect arrangement. Until the night Eddie announced they were leaving and never coming back.
As Robin tucked herself into bed beside Steve she turned to face him. “Can I just say one more thing and then I pinky promise I won’t bring it up again?”
“I don’t know why you’re asking,” he said with a sigh. “Me objecting has never stopped you before.”
“Totally true,” she smiled. “I just really think that you should tell him. He’s either gonna feel the same way, or he won’t. But either way you’ll finally know and you won’t be stuck constantly wondering anymore.”
Steve looked over to her. The bedside lamp behind her head casted a yellow glow around her face. “But what if he hates me after?”
“Then he’s a dick and we slash his tires,” she answered easily. “But from what you’ve told me, the way you talk about him… I really don’t think that’s going to be an issue.”
Robin fell asleep not long after. She always fell asleep easily, no matter where she was. Steve envied that about her. As he lay awake, staring at the ceiling, he considered what she’d said. He wondered silently to himself if knowing how Eddie felt once and for all was worth potentially throwing away their friendship. He decided, maybe foolishly, to take her advice. He’d wait until he was done with the car, just in case. No matter what he still wanted Eddie and Lucy in a safe vehicle, after all.