Word count: 1277
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We return our skates to the kid at the desk and get our shoes back in return. The lady at the front desk cheerfully waves us out as we leave.
It's still awkward. I'd love to break the tension but I'm still so flustered I don't know what to say. I really hope he hasn't noticed me sweating.
We head to the car and get in. I should say something. Come on bad, SAY SOMETHING.
"So.. are you getting hungry?"
He says nothing. I look over to him, and he's just staring off into space. God, I messed up. What have I done? I humiliated him public!
Of course he's upset right now. We were in a room surrounded by people, and he fell on top of me. Everyone's eyes were on him. On me. Judging me.
I can practically hear their thoughts.
'What is a cutie like him doing on top of that ogre?'
'Ew, I can smell him from here. How is that man even able to be that close?'
'Is he okay?'
'Why is he even with someone like that?'
I swear I heard some of them laughing. At me. What was I thinking? Accepting skeppy's request to dance? I should've known I would mess it all up. I should've known I'd find a way to upset him.
Why is he even still here? When we get home he probably won't talk to me ever again. He'll grab his stuff and stay in a hotel for the rest of the trip, then get on a plane home and never talk to me again.
God, I'm so stupid! He hates me now. You know what, he probably hated me before! He just pitied me and hid it.
I feel my grip tighten on the wheel, and tears start to bubble up in my eyes.
I'm so pathetic.
I try as hard as possible to push everything down and keep myself from crying. But try as I might, I fail and drops of water stream down my face.
Sniffles escape my nose and hiccups erupt out of my throat. I sob harder and harder the more I think, and as much as I try to stop, I can't.
My throat stings from trying to hold it in. All of a sudden skeppy turns to me.
"OH MY GOD BAD! ARE YOU OK?"
He quickly reaches over and places a hand on my shoulder.
"I-I'm- (sniff) fine.."
"No you're not! Is this the whole body image thing again?"
"I..." how honest should I be with him? He deserves to know, but what if he does hate me and is just putting up a front?
"Bad. Please talk to me.." he asks gently. Oh, so gently. It makes my heart skip another unbearable beat.
".. do you promise you won't use this against me?"
"Yes bad. I promise." He responds so quickly I'm not even sure if he knew what I actually said.
I take a deep breath in, gathering my thoughts. And when I speak, it all spills out of me like a hole in a bucket.
"I just feel so bad and like I'm embarrassing you by existing! You- (hic) were so embarrassed after we fell that I- I thought you were upset with me! And I mean I would be too if I were you! Having all those people looking at you as you're effectively straddling the ugliest person in the room, I can't imagine how humiliated you must feel!"
I take a second to breath, and skeppy just looks at me with glossy eyes, like he's about to cry.
"An- and you've been so nice to me this whole trip and never made fun of how I look so I got too comfortable and assumed you actually didn't mind when you obviously do and-"
"What?! What do you mean I obviously mind? I really don't! Please tell me I didn't accidentally do something to hurt your feelings!"
Skeppy started crying too. Great, now I made him cry!
"Everyone thinks I look weird.. why would you (sniff) be different?"
He looks so concerned.
"Bad. Listen to me." He gently grabs one of my hands and clasps it between his.
"I don't think you're ugly. I don't mind how you look, and I'm not embarrassed by being seen with you! I don't know who broke you down to the point you think this low of yourself, but I want you to know that they're just a bitch! No one thinks you're ugly"
We both just continue to cry. He's tried to assure me before, but this time seems extremely genuine. Even more than before.
"Thanks skeppy.. it's just, the way everything played out, people probably thought we were dating or something and I felt so horrible for embarrassing you by making people think you liked boys or something.."
He looks a little confused.
"Well, if they did think that, it wouldn't embarrass me considering I do like men."
I stop. Did he just say what I think he said?
"Really..?"
"Pff- yeah dude, I'm bi! The whole reason I was so awkward after it all happened was because my mind went blank!"
Oh. So he wasn't embarrassed because of me. Well, he was? I think? But in a different way? I don't know what he meant by that.
"Oh! Well- um- I guess this is a good time to tell you i'm gay?"
His eyes light up, more than I've ever seen.
"Really?!"
He's grinning from ear to ear. If he was a dog, his tail would be wagging so fast he would lift himself off the ground.
"Yeah.." I smile, wiping my eyes with my free hand.
Skeppy lurches forward and hugs me.
"That's so cool dude!"
I just laugh. It's actually kind of unbelievable he didn't even suspect I'm queer.
"Uh thanks? Did you really not even suspect I might be?"
He lets go of me, leaning back in his seat and looking off to the side, then he mutters something under his breath that I don't quite catch.
"Uh.. what did you say?"
He flushes. Wait, what?
"All the pretty guys are usually straight.."
WHAT? He- he thinks I'm pretty! He's said it before, but this time it was less in a 'bro' way and in more of a..
Romantic.. way..
OHHHKAYY BAD CALM DOWN. He didn't mean it like that, did he? The air starts to grow awkward again, so I try to lighten it up with a quick joke.
"Hah, I guess that's why I though you were straight too."
His eyes widen and he looks at me like a deer in headlights.
"What..?"
CRAP.
"Uh-! Nothing!" I snap my head forward to stare out the windshield, red in the face.
"Pfff- HAAHHHHAHA" skeppy begins excreting a bellowing laugh. His effortlessly contagious giggle start getting to me and I feel laughter bubbling up in my throat as well.
I throw my head back against the head rest, giggling. We both continue to laugh for who knows how long.
"Pff- bad- haha- I can't!- (SNORT)"
We both laugh even harder.
"WHAT- IS- PFHAHAHA- WRONG WITH YOU?!"
"IM SORRYYYAHAHAI!"
"I CANT BREATH YOU JERK!" I start wheezing and coughing from how hard I was laughing, causing skeppy to continue to laugh.
"Pff- hah- okay okay! Calm down!" He reaches over and clutches onto my arm for dear life, both of us still giggling.
We finally stop laughing and both gasp for air.
"God bad, what's wrong with us?" He turns to me and smiles. I turn my head to him, staring into his eyes.
I softly smile.
"Nothing, skeppy. Nothing."