Love in the Shadows (Book 2)

Chapter 17

"Un-break My Heart" - Toni Braxton

Peace.

It's so peaceful.

I don't remember the last time it was so–

*beep*

Where was I...

Right...peaceful

So quiet and–

*beep*

What the hell is that?

It's interrupting my–

*beep*

Oh god...fine, no more peace.

I can feel myself starting to come back, little by little my mind is drifting away from the peace of emptiness and coming closer to reality. I can hear that incessant beeping that pulled me out in the first place. I can feel the cushion of the bed underneath me. I can feel a warmth over one hand, and it's that sensation that finally pushes me to open my eyes. Dim lighting invades my eyes, causing me to squint as I adjust to it.

My head still feels heavy, and I slowly turn to the left, trying to fight the dizziness. I'm in a hospital room...right the mission, the poison, the pain. I look down at myself and see a typical hospital gown covering me, which means at some point I was changed into it. I look to the right and I see...

Steve, sitting at my bedside. His head is resting beside me, and over my hand, and I can't help but wonder if he's asleep.

I open my mouth, but hesitate to speak. The last time I did I struggled. And despite the fact that I know things are different considering I have no problem breathing, the memory of it still scares me.

"Steve?" I finally croak out, feeling a slight strain on my voice but ultimately I know it's good.

His head immediately snaps up, making it clear he wasn't sleeping, just resting. His eyes widen with shock, before I see complete relief pass through them.

"Mia." he sighs, clearly glad to see I'm awake.

"How long have I been out?" I ask, trying to look around to get an indication of a time of day. There isn't a window, so I can't tell, and my eyes are still too blurry to read the clock on the wall.

"Eight hours." he replies, looking like he suffered through every minute of it. And I know what that's like. I'm only glad it was only a few hours, and not the three weeks I suffered here with him.

I groan as I close my eyes, struggling to open them back up. "I'm still so tired." I say, knowing I could easily fall back asleep right now.

"They said that would be normal after what your body has been through." Steve explains, and I feel his fingers brush my skin before pulling away. "They expect you to be in and out of sleep for a while."

I open my eyes, turning back to face him as I feel the absence of his touch on me. He's pulled into himself, like he's afraid to take up any space. I can see he's holding back so many emotions and I can't help but note how different this reunion was to the one we had when he was in this bed instead of me.

I threw myself at him, crying as I kissed him over and over again, grateful that he was alive. And now...I can still see the gratitude in his eyes, but he doesn't come to me, in fact, he pulled away. I know why. After everything we've been through I can understand. Even though I told him I forgave him, I told him I loved him. Things still feel...off.

I look at him with a longing look, craving what we used to have. "Are you okay?" I ask him.

His brow furrows, clearly confused that I am asking him when I'm the one in the hospital bed. "Yeah..." he says with a slight chuckle. "I'm okay."

We stare at each other for a moment, both of us clearly with things we want to say but won't.

I mean, I get it. Yesterday wasn't exactly the reunion we thought we would have, if we had one at all. It felt rushed, because it was. And a bit forced, because it was. I mean, I thought I was going to die, I thought I wouldn't have another chance to say that to him. And while I don't regret it, I can kind of understand if Steve felt like it wasn't real. Like it somehow didn't count.

I don't want to just dismiss what he did like it was nothing. It definitely wasn't nothing. But after seeing how easy it is to just lose everything, it makes me see things a little differently.

Because when I was scared that I was going to die, despite everything, it was Steve who I wanted there with me.

"Steve–"

Suddenly footsteps entering the room interrupt me, and I turn to see Loki walking in, eyes focused on the two cups in his hand as he walks past me and towards Steve.

"I wasn't sure what other things you put in this but I brought some–" His eyes lock with mine and then widen in surprise, clearly not having noticed I was awake. "Mia!" he gasps, frozen with one hand extended out towards Steve, handing him one of the cups he brought in.

What...is...happening?

Steve takes the cup and there's an awkward silence as Loki opens his palm and materializes sugar and creamer, holding it out for him.

"Did you just bring him coffee?" I ask in complete disbelief.

They both look at each other, seeming a little embarrassed about the whole thing.

Loki clears his throat, stepping back to sit on the chair that is on the other side of my bed, opposite of where Steve is. "We planned on staying up all night to take care of you. They said this stuff helps."

That...is absolutely adorable. There's no way this is real. I definitely must still be dreaming.

I close my eyes, hoping that when I open them, they're both still here.

"Should I get a doctor?" Loki asks, and when I look back at him I can see the concern on his face.

"No, it's okay." I say, realizing that closing my eyes at all was a bad idea. "I'm probably going to just pass out again in a few minutes."

Both Steve and Loki shift in their seats, clearly getting concerned.

"I'm going to go get a doctor." Loki says, before getting up and heading out the door.

Steve finally comes back towards me, placing his hand on the bed next to me, but doesn't actually let us touch.

"How are you feeling?" he asks, looking me over.

"Tired." I reply, closing my eyes again for just a moment. I don't know how it's possible to feel so exhausted, but my body feels like it hasn't slept in days despite just waking up.

"You should let yourself rest." Steve says. "The doctors said it will help your body heal."

I want to roll my eyes and say, how can the doctors possibly know that when they weren't the ones who cured me, but I decide sarcastic remarks should be left for when I'm feeling fully better. Besides, I guess they're not wrong considering I am really tired.

I look back over at Steve, his beautiful face just watching me. "Can you do me a favor?" I ask, my voice getting softer as the fatigue really starts to hit.

"Of course." he replies, looking almost relieved that I would even ask him for help.

I'm afraid of what he's going to say, especially considering how cautious he's being with me, but there is only one thing my body craves more than sleep right now.

"Will you hold me while I sleep?"

Shock completely covers his face and I can hear a soft gasp leave his lips. But then I see something else replace it. Relief, joy, sorrow, sympathy, and ultimately, protectiveness. He nods his head, standing up from the chair as he towers over me.

I make a small movement to try and shift to make him room, and it's then that I realize my body is much more than just tired; it's sore as fuck. I imagine getting hit with a massive sonic wave gun will do that. I can't help but wince as my body starts to move, and it scares the hell out of Steve.

"Careful Mia..." he says, flinching as if it's him who's being hurt. "Maybe we shouldn't–"

"No, please." I beg, really needing this. "I'm okay...please."

He sighs, but doesn't say anything else. So I continue to make room for him, careful to not make too much of a fuss at my aching body anymore. Once there's enough space he crawls in, lifting the blanket so he can get underneath it.

He keeps a distance, which is counterintuitive to what I'm asking him. So instead I take the initiative and snuggle close to him, coming up until I'm on his chest. His body stiffens, not really sure what to do, and I'm not sure if it's because of what happened between us or because he knows my body is in pain right now. But eventually he does calm down a little, his body softening against mine as he wraps his arms around my shoulders, holding me like I asked him too. I'm pressed against his chest and I let out a big sigh as I start to hear his heartbeat. It's fast and loud, but the longer I lay against him, the more it starts to slow down, as if finally adjusting to this again. I focus on it, trying to drown out the rest of the world.

And it's his soft heartbeat that easily lulls me to sleep.

***

I hear what sounds like voices talking, but they sound muffled, like if I'm wearing earplugs. It takes me a moment to remember what is going and remember that I'm asleep in a hospital...with Steve.

Steve.

I can feel his arms around me, holding me close, just like I asked him to. Beneath my head I can feel the small intake of his breaths, and the slight vibration of him talking.

Oh. He's one of the voices I hear. But who is he talking to? A doctor maybe? Tony? Bucky?

I can't seem to get my eyes to open, the exhaustion keeping my body under. In fact, I don't even know if what I'm hearing is actually happening, for all I know, I could be dreaming right now. I don't actually see anything, it's just dark. But the voices are starting to get clearer. I'm in this half-conscious state of mind, my body clearly still wanting to stay asleep, but my mind is slightly aware of my surroundings.

"She seems at peace." Loki? Loki! That's who's here. I guess he did say they were both planning on staying here to watch me. I just didn't think they would actually do it. "After seeing her in so much pain it's..."

"I know." Steve replies, his voice low, but clear in the silence of what I'm assuming is nighttime. "Listen if you want to go get some rest you can. I'm sure she's going to sleep through the night."

"If it's alright, I'd like to stay. I'd feel more comfortable at least being able to see her."

They're...being civil. It's weird...but nice.

There's a quiet moment, and I feel Steve slightly stir underneath me.

"It must have been hard for you." he says, breaking the silence. "I mean, it was hard for all of us, but...you had already lost her once before. Or at least thought you did. It must have been harder to think it was about to happen again."

I hear Loki sigh, pausing to think before answering. "Yes...and no." There's no reply from Steve, and I'm imagining he's waiting for Loki to elaborate. "Yes it was torturous to think that, after finding out she wasn't dead, I was just going to lose her again. But, while you can never really prepare for that, I already knew what to expect. I knew what that heartbreak was going to feel like. Which is why I tried to spend those last moments just being with her, seeing her. Something I would have done the first time if I knew I wasn't going to see her again."

I feel Steve's fingers caress my arms, as if he's reminding himself that I'm still here. I can hear his heart rate accelerate a little bit before he takes a breath and calms it down.

"Look if you tell anyone I said this I will deny it but...I get it." Steve says. "I think if the roles had been reversed, I wouldn't have let go of her that easily either."

"You're wrong." Loki replies with no doubt in his tone. "Because if the roles had been reversed I would have killed you."

Steve chuckles softly, and it's clear it's just teasing.

"I should have killed you after what you did to her." Loki says, darkening the tone of the room. Steve's arms tighten around me, like he's afraid I'll leave. "Apparently she's forgiven you though."

"I don't know if she really has or, she just didn't want to die with that between us."

No! Well...yes, not just because of that, but yes.

"You say that while she's literally sleeping in your arms."

Not sleeping, not really. Too tired to actually wake up but too aware to fully go to sleep, it's kind of torturous actually. Unless...the fact that they're being so calm as they speak might be an indication that I really am asleep, and this is all a dream.

"I just need to know that she's going to be okay." Loki says, and I can hear the longing in his voice. 

"Of course she is. I love her."

"See I would have believed that a few days ago."

"You haven't wanted to believe that since you got here."

"Not true. I was blinded by my feelings for her, by the memory of what we shared, that I refused to believe she could possibly love anyone the way she loved me. But you...I never doubted your love for her. Until you did what you did."

A pause, and I feel Steve's head tilt down to look at me. "I lost her trust. And then I almost lost her." I feel his lips brush against the top of my head before he looks back up. "Believe me I won't be making the same mistake again. I promise you that I'll love and protect her the way she deserves."

"You don't need to make that promise to me. You need to make it to her."

"Believe me," Steve says, and I feel his fingers brush down my arm until he can cover my hand, which is resting over his chest. "If she'll have me, I will."

"Just know Rogers, if you ever hurt her like that again...I don't care how much she begs me not to, I will kill you."

Steve kisses the top of my head, putting his arm around me again and cradling me to his body. "Deal."

They're quiet. Quiet for a long enough time that my mind has nothing more to focus on, and I can slowly feel it drifting back into the darkness, the blanket of sleep covering over me once again.

***

I take in a deep breath, snuggling closer to the warmth that's next to me.

Steve...my Steve.

I sigh, feeling completely content being here, especially after everything that happened these past couple of days. Part of me thought I would never get to be here again. I can feel myself coming to more and more, and it's a relief considering the weird coma-like state I was in earlier.

I still don't know if that conversation I heard was real.

I finally manage to open my eyes, taking a minute to adjust to the light, grateful that it's dimmed. It's so hard to tell what time it is in this place.

I look up and see Steve's peaceful face, eyes closed as he takes in steady breaths. He's asleep. I can only imagine how tired he must be. I've been sleeping for god knows how many hours and, if the conversation I heard was real, he's been up for most of it. I rest my head back down on his chest, happy to continue to let us both rest.

But only a few minutes go by before I feel Steve stir underneath me as he starts to wake up. Once he remembers I'm still laying on him he stiffens, trying hard not to wake me up. I feel bad, because if he sees I'm awake he's going to think it's him who woke me up. So instead I keep still, pretending to sleep for a few moments longer. I give it a few minutes before I start to stir, acting like I'm just waking up before tilting my head back and looking up at him.

"Morning." he whispers, his eyes scanning me over to get a sense of where I'm at.

Hmm I'm good...wait what? "Morning?" I ask, turning to the clock on the wall. My vision is a little better now, so I can read it, and it is in fact eleven o'clock...in the morning I guess.

"Yeah, you slept through the night." Steve says, loosening his hold on me to give me a chance to stretch. And I can't help but wonder if he got tired, holding me all night. But as I shift off of him I can see a bit of sadness in his eyes, and I think he almost wishes I would stay in his arms for longer.

But I can't believe I've been out this long. I don't feel as sleepy, but my body is definitely still tired and sore. "Shit." I whisper, feeling guilty for sleeping for so many hours. I know Steve said the doctors told him this would happen, but it's still concerning to think about.

"How are you feeling?" he asks, slightly shifting up on the bed.

"Better." I say, deciding to let my head rest on the pillow while my body gets a little more accustomed to being awake. "Still a little tired but...better." I look around the room, being able to see it a little more clearly now, and I can't help but notice the empty chair sitting on one side of it.

"Loki." I whisper without even thinking about it.

"He left a few minutes ago to go shower. But he'll be back." Steve says, answering my unasked question.

"He slept here?" I ask, eyeing the chair that really does not look that comfortable.

"Yeah. He said he felt more comfortable being able to see you."

Oh...

So the conversation I heard was real...or at least that part of it was.

I turn to face Steve and I can see he's overthinking the fact that I asked about Loki. He's still so unsure about us, and if the rest of his talk with Loki from last night is also true, I understand why.

I turn my body back to him leaning over and once again resting my head on his chest. I just want to give him some sense of comfort and understanding. I need him to understand that I wouldn't have asked him to hold my last night if I wasn't comfortable with him. If I didn't want him back.

"You haven't eaten in nearly 24 hours. You must be hungry." Steve says, his fingers running up and down my arm.

Shit. I haven't eaten. I barely even ate yesterday before the mission. And that's only because Tony made me eat a granola bar before we left. I guess my body was too busy trying to recover from nearly dying to really notice. But now that I think about it, yeah...yeah I'm definitely hungry.

I nod my head, answering Steve's comment.

"Okay. I'm going to go get you something to eat." he says, shifting as he starts to pull away from me.

"Wait." I quickly say, sliding my hand on his chest to try and keep him here. He watches me with curiosity as I look up at him before sliding my hand up his chest, over to behind his neck. I can see his eyes widen with shock as I start to lean up while simultaneously pulling him down. We get closer, our foreheads pressing together, and I can feel the warmth of his lips.

But he turns his head to the side, denying our lips from actually touching.

"Mia..." he says, and I can hear the hesitancy in his voice. "You're still a little groggy, you might not be thinking clearly. I don't want you doing something you might regret."

Wow. he really didn't believe me yesterday. And while part of me appreciates him trying to be cautious and respectful, I'm getting so impatient, my body craving him more than actual food right now.

"Steve..." I groan, getting desperate. "Stop thinking and just kiss me."

And without a second thought he tilts his head, finally pressing his lips against mine.

It's like a shock runs through our bodies as we're finally reunited, causing both of us to gasp before continuing to kiss. It's passionate, desperate, all the emotions from the past three days mixing together and causing us to just lose ourselves in each other. We grasp each other's bodies, like we're afraid the other person is going to disappear. We're pulling each other as close as we can as our mouths move together with so much hunger, as if it would be our last kiss ever.

After a few moments we finally pull away, taking a moment to catch our breaths while staying as close as we can. My hand slides down to Steve's cheek and I can feel his jaw tremble. I open my eyes, but find his shut tight, and yet I still see the tears start to escape them.

"Hey, look at me." I say, forcing his head up and I try to get his eyes to open. "I'm here. I'm okay." He finally looks at me, and I can see how much pain there is in them. I don't know if it's because he thought I would never take him back after what he did, or because I almost died yesterday, probably a mix of both. But he's still in disbelief that this is happening.

I lean down, resting my head on his chest again and I feel his arms come around me.

"I can't imagine the kind of pain you went through." he says as he holds me close.

"Yeah, it sucked." I say, not even wanting to remember it. "But I'm oka–"

"You asked me to kill you." he whispers. "Or asked us to kill you."

Shit. I thought that was all in my head. I can't imagine what it must have been like to hear me scream that as I writhed in pain.

Oh god...Tony.

I lean back up, meeting his gaze as the words get caught in my throat, a feeling I did not want to go through again for a long, long time. "I-I didn't realize I had said that out loud." I say, remembering my internal thoughts as I suffered through the antidote for the poison. "I'm sorry."

"Steve..." I say, reaching for his cheek again as I wipe away his tears. "I'm okay now. I promise."

He nods his head, taking a breath to calm himself down before I feel him shift again. "I'm going to find you some breakfast. I'll be right back." he says, and I give him one last kiss before moving out of the way so that he can get off the bed. He turns, giving me a smile before heading out the door.

For the first time that I'm aware of, I'm alone. And I can't help but let out one shaky breath. I feel like I want to cry, the emotions of the past 36 hours are fucking insane and part of me wants to just let it all out. But instead I take deep breaths, trying to just keep calm.

I find the control for the bed and shift it up so I can sit comfortably. I inspect my body a little, trying to see what the damage is. I don't have an IV attached, maybe because they still weren't too sure what effects this world's medicine might have on me after what happened. Underneath my gown I see a small patch on my chest, and I'm assuming that's how they're monitoring my heart rate. There's a small amount of wrapping on my hands, but they don't sting as bad as they did yesterday. There's light bruising all around my arms, and I'm pretty sure it's on my body too. I reach up to my neck feeling it a little tender, and on the left side, I can still feel the faint lines of the cuts I used to have. Those probably healed with the antidote Loki gave me.

The soreness isn't as bad as the last time I woke up, and I feel it more in isolated locations as opposed to my whole body. My back hurts, and the sides of my body feel bruised. Not too bad all things considering.

A knock on the door pulls my attention away from my injuries and I look up to see a familiar face.

"Ana."

She smiles, a soft sympathetic smile. "Hey Mia." she says, stepping more into the room. "How are you?"

"Alive." I say, not really knowing what else I can say.

"I heard it was...scary." Ana says, and I can see the concern on her face.

Now that I think about it, I didn't see Ana in the hangar when we came back. Granted there was a lot going on so I don't know if I would have really noticed unless she was in the circle immediately around me. 

"Yeah, it was." I say to her, finding the sad look on her face a little odd. I'm not used to seeing Ana this vulnerable. She's never let me see that, or that I'm aware of, anybody see it. But there is a genuine unease in her voice and I can see that she truly did worry for me. 

I extend my hand out to the chair next to me, inviting her to sit down. She takes the offer and when she walks over I can't help but notice the yellow folder she has in her hands.

"You must be glad it's over." she says, tucking the folder between her and the chair. It could be anything, and nothing of importance to me, so I ignore it.

"I don't think it is." I admit, pretty confident that this is far from over. "But for now."

She nods and I see her fingers move to touch the folder, but she doesn't grab it. She looks down at it before quickly looking away.

Is...is she nervous? I don't think I've ever seen Ana nervous.

"What do you got there?" I finally ask, knowing she wouldn't have brought that with her if it didn't pertain to me.

She sighs, finally pushing past the nerves and reaching for the folder. "Something I need to talk to you about." she says. Her confident demeanor is back, in fact, she practically looks determined.

"Does it have to do with the help Steve asked you for?" I ask, hoping I can finally get an answer on that.

She's clearly shocked that I know about that. "He told you?"

I shake my head. "No, I overheard you guys talking." I admit. "I didn't hear what he was asking of you, just that he wanted your help with something." I can see she's still slightly hesitant to tell me, which means it's bad. "What's going on?"

"Steve told me a bit about the conversation you guys had."

There's so many conversations she could be talking about. "What did he say?" I ask.

"He told me that apparently Sharon came to you and rambled off a list of arguments you and he had, and then claimed that it was him who told her all of this."

Oh...that. "He said it wasn't him." I say, still wanting to believe him. But I'm starting to get an idea of what Steve asked of Ana.

She shrugs, like she definitely didn't want to believe him. "He told me the same thing. And then asked me if I can try and find out how Sharon got all this information."

I swallow, suddenly feeling very nervous. "Did you?"

"I did."

Was this why she was nervous? Because it's not good news? Was Steve lying to me?

Before I can fully start to freak out she hands me the folder she has. With slightly shaky hands I open it up, seeing pages of zoomed up screenshots from a phone.

"Messages?" I ask, seeing the text conversations.

"Between Sharon and someone here you might remember."

I'm assuming the blue text bubbles are from Sharon, so I look up at the name on top of the pages to see who she was messaging with. I assumed they were between her and Steve, but I was wrong.

Katy?

That stupid agent who was flirting with Steve, who I lashed out at when she was staring at Loki and I and whispering to her friends.

I read through a couple of the back and forth messages. They're just talking about how undeserving I am of Steve, how they don't know what he sees in me, Sharon talks about what a horrible person I am for lying to her about being with Steve, how she would have never kept him a secret, how if he had been with her she would gladly told everyone from the first moment.

I'm trying hard not to rip these papers as I shuffle through them. "How did you get these?" I ask as I keep reading. Normally I couldn't give two shits about what these women think about me, but they're judging me on things that I deeply regret, and things I'm still learning to forgive myself for, and it does hurt.

"Katy's an idiot who leaves her phone lying around. How she ever became a S.H.I.E.L.D. agent is beyond me." Ana says as she rolls her eyes. "I got into it, took a bunch of screenshots, sent them to my phone and then deleted the evidence."

As I get farther into the messages I see Katy relay information to Sharon. She talked to her about how hurt Steve was that I left for London for three months, and Sharon replied that she'd reach out to him now that I was gone. She told Sharon about Loki the second it happened, and Sharon told her she was already asking Steve to go and see her. She told her about Loki staying here, about my birthday, about us fighting at my party. They even manage to talk about our problems before we went public, though most of the information she gives are only half truths and most of them seemed like assumed rumors that went around the compound after everyone found out about Steve and I.

"How could she know this? She's new and neither Steve nor I talk to her." I ask, realizing how creepy this is all becoming.

"People in this place love to gossip. Anything that got out to the agents she could have asked about." Ana replies. "As for the rest..."

She pauses, but I'm far enough into the messages that I find what she's talking about.

I got it!

You got into his phone?

Yeah, I'm going through it now.

Ew. His texts to her are so
gross. I still cannot believe I lost him to this bitch.

Well, hopefully we'll
fix that soon.

My stomach turns in the most disgusting way. "She hacked into his phone?" I say, tears of anger pricking my eyes.

Ana nods, and I can tell this makes her uncomfortable too. "She read the messages between you and him, him and Bucky, him and Sam." she says, and as I read on I can see her talk about that. "Any time he was upset and reached out to his friends, she read it. That's how she knew about all of those fights."

She knew about all of it before he even went to talk to her. Yes I still hate that he even confided in her, but it was clear she would coax the problem out of him, because she already knew about them.

"She's fucking obsessed." I say, knowing this is much more concerning than I ever could have thought.

"She's fucking insane is what she is." Ana says. "You should report her." I look up at her, a little shocked, because my mind never even went there. "Mia this is harassment. She used her status at S.H.I.E.L.D. to hack into an Avengers' phone with the intent of meddling into his personal life. She needs to be held accountable."

She's right, this is...gross and unacceptable and it makes me feel violated, I can't imagine how Steve is going to...

Steve.

"I need to talk this out with Steve." I say, knowing this is more of a violation to him than me. "This involves him too. This is his privacy she invaded. I can't make this decision without him."

She nods, understanding where I'm coming from. "I don't think you should completely let him off the hook." she says with a shrug, clearly still mad at him. "But at least he was telling the truth about this."

Yeah...as much as I hate knowing what Sharon did, it does clear up a big issue I had with what Steve did.

"Thank you Ana." I say, feeling really grateful for her right now. "I know you risked a lot...hacking...into another S.H.I.E.L.D. agent's phone." I say, the irony of the situation just hitting me.

"Hey, Sharon did it maliciously, I did it for a good cause." Ana says, defending herself.

"I know, I'm not judging. I just don't want you to get in trouble for the same thing she is if we do end up reporting this."

Ana shrugs, not really concerned about it. "Intent matters in these situations. Maybe I'll get a slap on the wrist but it would be worth it if Sharon gets what she deserves."

I smile, thinking about how different this Ana is from the one I first had to deal with...well, I guess it's still the same Ana, I'm just not on her bad side anymore. "I appreciate it. And I know Steve will too."

She gives me a look of disgust. "You overheard the part when I said I did this for you and not him right?"

I nod and I can't help but chuckle. Yeah...definitely the same Ana. "Are we friends now?" I ask, needing the get a clear answer from her. She's done a lot for me, so I'd definitely consider her one, but considering how things started off between us, I need to hear her say it before I truly believe it.

"Are you and Steve getting back together?" she asks, and it seems like it's an important question for her.

"Yeah, we are." I say, hesitantly, wondering what that has to do with it.

She shrugs, seeming a little disappointed. "Well then I guess I have to take what I can get." she says, then gives me a teasing smile. "Yeah, we're friends."

Well, in that case...

"You're cool with Nat and Wanda right?" I ask, knowing I haven't really seen them interact very much.

"Yeah, they're hot." Ana says with a nod.

I laugh, although I guess that's the answer I wanted. "And you know our friend Olivia right?"

"Bucky's girl?" Ana asks.

Awww...I like that. "Yeah, Bucky's girl." I say with a smile.

"Yeah, she's hot too."

I love that that's her qualification for whether or not she likes someone.

"We all get together and have a girl's night every once in a while. Maybe next time you can join us?"

She's genuinely shocked to hear me ask, and I see her eyes light up. "Really?" she asks with disbelief in her voice.

"Yeah."

She smiles, and it's yet another side of Ana I haven't seen yet. "Yeah. I would love that." she says, getting excited by the idea. Suddenly there's a beeping and she looks down at her watch before cursing under her breath. "I have to get back to work, but I just wanted to bring you that." She gets up, looking like she really doesn't want to, but knows she has to go.

"Thank you again Ana." I say as she walks to the door.

She looks back at me and gives me her famous flirty look. "Glad you didn't die." she says in a cheery voice, before walking away, leaving me laughing.

But the joyous feeling dies down when I pick up the folder again, looking through the messages with complete disbelief.

I still can't believe Sharon would go to these lengths just to separate Steve and me. It's disturbing and seems so childish. She's delusional, and despite that I know for a fact I can kick her ass, I don't feel safe with her. She has too much power and status in this place, she doesn't need to fight me physically to do damage.

I hear someone come closer and I look up to see Steve walking in with a food tray in his hands.

"I was starting to get worried." I tease as I put all the papers back into the folder and set it on the nightstand beside me.

He comes in, setting the tray on the overbed table and then adjusts it so it's at a proper height. "Sorry. I needed to make sure they made it right." he says, and then looks over at the folder. "What's that?"

"That...is something we need to discuss." I say, not even knowing how to even tell him this. "Later."

He gives me an unsure look, and I know the curiosity is getting to him, but he doesn't pursue it further. Instead he lifts up the cover, revealing a tray full of food.

"Holy crap." I gasp out. Scrambled eggs, bacon, sausage, hash browns, mini pancakes, and 2 slices of whole wheat toast. 

"Too much?" Steve asks as he looks at my face. "I'm sorry, I just made sure they got all of your favorites."

"Thank you." I say, knowing that I appreciate his intentions. "Are you hungry? Maybe we can share it." Sharing a breakfast would definitely bring a sense of normalcy to our relationship, which is something we sorely need right now.

He shakes his head. "No. You go ahead."

He's lying, because he wants to make sure I eat.

"Let me rephrase that." I say, with a soft smile. "Will you have breakfast with me?" I ask,  with a small pout. "Please."

I can see he's thinking the same thing I am, that things might start to feel normal again, but for some reason, the thought seems to scare him. "Okay." he says with a nervous smile.

I shift the table so that it's between the both of us and we start to eat, little by little at first. He hesitates every single bite, and I can tell it's just because he wants to indulge me, but I can see he still plans on letting me eat this whole thing by myself.

"Has anyone else been here?" I ask him as I take a bite out of the bacon.

"Everyone." Steve says, looking down at the plate as he merely pushes some eggs around.

"Tony?" I ask, worried about him after the way he was yesterday. "Is he okay?"

"Yeah. He was here all yesterday. Only left about half an hour before you woke up the first time." he sets his fork down and finally looks back up at me. "He wanted to stay but he had to go take care of Pepper."

Immediately I can feel my heart drop. "Take care? What's wrong, is she okay?"

"She's fine." Steve quickly says, regretting his choice of words. "It's just...seeing you like this, and hearing what happened to you..." he pauses and it makes me really uneasy. "She took it hard, and Tony obviously took her to get some rest."

"But she's okay?" I ask, wanting to go see her now.

"Yeah. He said she was fine." Steve says, trying hard to make sure I don't start freaking out right now. I guess he wants to make sure I worry about myself before I start to worry about others.

"Everybody else is okay?" I ask, knowing with all the attention on me yesterday, I had no way of knowing if anything else went wrong on the mission.

"Yeah." Steve assures me, and I don't see any sighs he's lying for the sake of not worrying me, so I calm down a little.

Even though he's hardly eaten anything he pushes the remaining eggs in my direction, wanting me to eat the rest. Considering I've eaten most of this and I'm getting kind of full I do him one better and use my fork to push all the remaining items over towards him. I give him a teasing smile, but find his eyes down onto the plate and a slight frown on his face.

The old Steve would have laughed. The old Steve would have gotten all dominant on me and told me to eat my food like a good girl. But this Steve, this Steve can barely even look at me.

I hate it. I hate this. I need to find a way to get him back.

"You know I had the craziest dream about Bucky while I was asleep." I'm lying, but I just need to see if it will still cause a reaction.

Steve's head finally snaps up, and I can see the possessiveness in his eyes. But it's short lived before he seems to cower back, looking away as if embarrassed that he allowed me to see that.

"Steve." I whine, not being able to take this anymore. He looks up at me with a questioning glance, like he's completely unaware of why I'm complaining. "How long are you going to keep doing this?"

He shrugs, really trying to feign innocence. "Doing what?"

"Acting like you have to walk on eggshells around me." I sigh, feeling like he's treating me like I'm made of glass or something.

He looks away, because he knows exactly what I'm talking about. "I'm just trying to be respectful."

I get it. I do. He's afraid of messing things up again. I am too. But I don't want things to change between us. Not like this. Not in a way that makes me feel like we're not even together anymore.

I reach forward, grabbing a slice of toast holding it out in front of me. "Open." I say, trying to bring some sense of our relationship back.

Steve sighs. "Mia–"

"Open." I repeat, elongating the word and making it clear I'm not asking.

And I can see it working. He can't help but smile as he opens his mouth and allows me to feed him. I stick the toast in his mouth and he chuckles as he bites down, reaching up to grab it from me and then tears it with his teeth.

I laugh, finally happy to see him smile like that. There's my Steve.

The tension drops between us, and for a moment it feels like it's us again. But it's short lived once Steve sets the remaining piece of toast back on the plate, and I see the concerned look return to his face. I know we can't just forget things, I know a conversation needs to happen. I just need him to open up to me without thinking that he's not allowed to say anything.

"We can't just pretend like nothing happened." Steve says, and I know what he's talking about.

I shift the table away, so that there's nothing in between us. "That's not what I'm suggesting." I say, knowing that the whole situation isn't even fully over yet.

"What are you suggesting?" Steve asks, and that's when I see it, the uncertainty. He doesn't know where I stand, where I truly stand. Of course not. We haven't had that conversation yet. I guess that's my fault for trying to jump right into this without talking first. I just missed him, and after what I went through, I hated the idea of wasting anymore time being apart.

"That we move forward; past all of this." I say, wanting to leave it all behind us. Not forget, but move on. We can't keep letting ourselves be miserable over this. It was either let this be the end of us and move on separately, or work past it and move on together. I want to be with him, I want to do this together.

"I just don't want you to feel like you have to forgive me." Steve says, and I can see the guilt is still fully in him.

"You don't want me to forgive you?" I ask, because it almost seems like he wants to hold onto that guilt, like he's afraid to let it go.

"Of course I do." Steve says, the desperation clear in his voice. "But because you feel in your heart like it's the right thing, not because nearly dying scared you."

The conversation I heard between him and Loki comes to mind. When he told him that he wasn't sure if I had actually forgiven him.

"I forgive you." I say, knowing he needs to hear me say it without the fear of death crawling behind me. "And yes, if yesterday had gone differently, I probably would have taken more time." More time for me, more time for him. "Maybe made you grovel a little more." I tease with a shrug of my shoulders. I see Steve smile, and I can only hope this is helping him understand. "But, after the conversation we had the other night, I think deep down I knew eventually I would get to this point."

I can see the hope lingering in his eyes. But he won't fully let it in. He's scared to let go of his guilt.

I sigh, wanting to reach out to him. "I don't think the problem is me forgiving you. I think the problem is you won't forgive yourself."

"I will never forgive myself for what I did." he quickly says, and I can hear the honesty in his words. He means that.

I sigh, starting to get a little worried that maybe this isn't going to work anymore. "Then we're going nowhere. We'll always be stuck here. You feeling like just saying the wrong thing is going to make me leave you again and me feeling like I never fully have you." I take in a breath, trying not to get emotional as I remember how things used to be. "Because I don't want this Steve who holds back because he's scared of me."

I reach forward, grabbing his hand in mine. "I want the Steve who jokes with me, laughs with me, teases me, does really dirty things to me if I ask him nicely." I say in a flirty tone. "And even dirtier things if I asked not so nicely." He smiles, and I can see the memories coming back to him. I tug on his hand, pulling him forward until I can hold it against my chest. "That's the Steve I want. My Steve."

He swallows hard, his heart fighting head. His love for me fighting against his fear. I keep my eyes on his, silently begging him to let this happen. To let us happen.

He pulls his hand away from mine, and my heart breaks at the rejection. But then he brings it up, sliding it along my neck, taking control for the first time as he presses his lips against mine. I gasp out in relief as I clutch onto his shirt, pulling him closer to me. His kiss is soft, caring, loving, signaling a new start for us.

He pulls away, keeping his forehead pressed to mine as his hand caresses my cheek. After a few more seconds he leans back onto his chair and I can immediately feel the difference between us. He looks more relaxed, more at peace, and I'm grateful to see him smile at me again.

"If you want..." he says, looking up at me with a playful look in his eyes. "I can grovel for you some more." he teases with a smirk.

"Yeah?" I ask, giving him the same flirty behavior. "Are you going to get on your knees for me Cap?"

His eyes darken, a lustful promise lingering in them. "For as long as you want me to."

Now we feel like the old us.

I don't know if we're fully there yet, not to mention the fact that my body's a little too sore for it. But just having the teasing back feels good. It makes me look forward to...the other thing.

Outside the room I see nurses rushing past the door, and a chill runs down my back, the memories of the last time I was in a hospital going through my mind. 

"Are you okay?" Steve asks, seeing my reaction. He reaches forward and grabs my hand.

"Can I ask you for one more thing?" I say, holding his hand tightly in mine. "Can you get me out of here?"

I see the surprise quickly pass his face before it's replaced with concern and uncertainty. "Mia the doctors need to keep an eye on you to make sure your body is recovering properly." he says, wanting to give me what I ask but clearly worried about my well being.

"All of which they can do from my room with Tony's technology." I reply. I understand where his concern is coming from, and I was able to let go of the discomfort earlier because I was struggling to stay awake. But the memories are more vivid now. "Look, the last time I was in a hospital it was at your bedside and I didn't know if you were even going to survive. It was torture, and being here makes me relive all of that." Even with the roles reversed, I still fear that I'm going to look up at him and suddenly see him lying unconscious on this bed. "I just want to get out of here."

I can see the indecision on his face as he holds my hand tighter. "Mia–"

"Steve please." I beg.

He sighs, but eventually I see him cave to me. "Okay, I'll see what I can do." he says, bringing his other hand to my cheek as he stands up, leaning over to me to softly kiss my lips. He makes a move towards the door before stopping and shifting the bedside table back towards me. "Eat." he commands before heading out. I can't help but smile, loving that he feels comfortable enough to talk to me like that.

I can't wait for him to do it again so I can say no. But right now, I am still hungry, so I comply.

I get a few bites in when someone approaches the door, and I look up to see Loki come up, a quick look of relief passing his face when he sees me.

"Hey." I say, glad to see him. 

He leans across the doorway and he looks at me with a sad expression on his face. "You lied."

"What?" I ask with a chuckle.

"You lied." he repeats.

It takes me a minute, but I finally understand what he means. "In my defense..." I say, feeling bad for the panic he must have gone through, "...technically I'm okay."

"You nearly died." Loki says, not finding my words amusing.

"But I didn't." I say, knowing it's all because of him.

I see him try to keep his angry composure, but eventually I see a smile break through.

"May I?" he says, signaling to the chair as he steps away from the doorway.

"Of course."

There's so much I want to say to him. We have a whole conversation pending from yesterday, and yet, so much has happened since then that it's not even my priority right now. "Loki..." I whisper, knowing the first thing I need to say. "Thank you for saving me."

He smiles, but then shakes his head. "You don't have to thank me for that, darling." he says. "It wasn't a favor. It was a necessity."

I get what he's saying, but it still feels weird to not say something after someone literally saves your life. "Either way. Thank you."

He gives me a faint nod, still not wanting to take the thanks, but also not wanting to argue with me. "I'm only sorry you had to go through that pain," he says. "I have seen that antidote be used only once before, that's how I knew it would be torturous but..." He closes his eyes, like it pains him to remember. "Seeing it used on someone I care about...that was difficult."

I remember what Steve said, about what I told everyone out loud. That must have been hard for him to hear too. "I appreciate you helping me and the others through it." I say, remembering how he guided everyone to help. "I think you really proved yourself to them."

"I didn't do it for anyone but you."

Damn. I thought maybe things would be different now. "Loki, I think it's only fair to tell you..." I say as I look down at my hands. "Steve and I are back together."

I look back up at him and find him watching me with an amused smile. "I know darling," he says. "You asked to sleep in his arms, I kind of figured as much."

Oh. That's right. The conversation I may or may not have heard. He did seem...accepting of things.

He shifts forward, leaning in as he lets out a deep breath. "Mia, I took what you said yesterday to heart, about how you couldn't be with me even if you two had separated." I can see the regret in his eyes, the guilt, and the sincerity of his words. "I know I hurt you and I'm sorry." he says. "I only hope to be able to win your forgiveness, and your trust back."

"You saved my life Loki. You have them both."

I can see the mix of emotions going through him. He's happy that I'm alive, happy that things are okay between us. But there's a hint of sadness, of longing, and of regret. I believe him, but I've made that mistake before. I just hope for the sake of his own well being, he truly means what he just told me.

"I have something of yours." he suddenly says, pulling me from my over analyzing of his emotions. He brings his hand up, palm facing down and fingers bunched together as if grasping something, but there's nothing there. Then a green light trickles down, revealing a silver chain hanging from Loki's fingers. And when it reaches the end it reveals what the chain is looped through.

A ring.

My ring...well, technically Loki's ring that he gave to me when we...got married.

No...no.

"Loki..." I sigh, knowing him accepting that it's over was too good to be true.

He looks down at the silver band with green small emeralds embedded in, as it gently swings in his hold. "I gave this to you the day we exchanged vows. And before we separated you handed it back to me as a promise...that we would see each other again and I could give it back to you." he extends his hand out, putting the ring within my reach. "It's yours."

He wants me to take my wedding ring back...why would he... "Loki, I can't accept that." I say, knowing he would read too much into it if I did. I'm sure he wants to hold onto some hope, and I'd be cruel to entertain the idea, even a little bit.

Loki pulls his hand back and lets out a deep breath before looking me in the eyes with determination. "You love him." he says, catching me off guard. "You choose him." he states, repeating the words I've said to him before. "I was arrogant to come in and refuse to believe what you told me time and time again. I'm sorry that I ignored your wishes, and I'm sorry that I caused so much pain between the two of you. This doesn't mean that you didn't love me, or that you don't care about me. And you choosing him doesn't erase the past we shared together."

I'm completely speechless. This is everything I've been trying to get him to understand since he got here. Not only about me loving Steve, but the fact that this doesn't invalidate what he and I went through. To hear him say it, to hear him accept it, and genuinely believe it, it's freeing.

Loki extends his hand out again, the chain swinging between us before it settles down. I still hesitate, not sure if I should take it, even with what he just said.

"I'm not going to misinterpret anything by you taking this." Loki says, trying to get rid of the last amount of doubt in me. "It is simply a representation of the love we once had. One that, even though it is over, I will cherish for the rest of my life."

I can feel the tears stinging my eyes, a feeling of sadness lingering between the relief. It's the closure I think we needed, and being able to take this ring from him, seems like the final test for both of us to be able to let this go.

I reach my hand out, placing it right underneath the ring and allowing Loki to drop it into my palm. "Thank you." I say, closing my hand around the ring and bringing it to my chest. "I'll always cherish it too."

He gives me a soft yet sad smile, but I can see the first steps of moving on reflected in it. He knows he can do this now. He knows it won't be the end of him if we're not together. And I can only hope he finds happiness within himself, and then if he wants, with someone else.

"Miss Stark." we hear a voice say, and we both turn to find who I'm assuming is my doctor standing in the doorway, along with Steve. "My name is Doctor Larson."

"Hi." I reply, trying to look as best as I can so she'll give me the green light to leave. Not that I would listen. I'm getting out of here whether she likes it or not.

"You gave your family quite a scare yesterday." Larson says as she steps into the room. "How are you feeling?"

"Still a little bit tired." I admit, hoping it won't worry her. "But, better."

"Good." she says, looking over the monitor beside me that's reading my vitals. "Captain Rogers has informed me that you no longer wish to stay here. Which is fine. All your vitals and tests have come out good, and it seems like your body is heading for a full recovery. Monitoring can continue to happen from your own room, so I have no problem discharging you. It is however important that someone keep an eye on you at all times for the next few days. That way if anything does come up we can get you back here to check on you."

Oh...that was easy.

"I understand. Thank you doctor." I say as I look over at Steve, and I can't help but wonder if he put up a fight and that's why they're letting me go with no issue. He catches my gaze and gives me a quick wink before turning back towards Doctor Larson.

"I'll get your paperwork filled out so you can go home." Larson says, giving all of us in the room a quick nod before heading out.

"Thank you." I say to Steve.

"Of course." he replies with a smile.

Loki clears his throat as he gets up from the chair. "I'll step out so you can change." he says, giving Steve a quick nod before leaving.

Yeah...that's going to take some getting used to.

Steve walks over towards the nightstand, opening up the top drawer and pulling out a clean set of clothes. "Nat brought this for you." he says, setting them down on the bed. He walks over and starts pulling the curtains around the bed. "I'll give you a minute." he says, standing outside of the curtains as he pulls them closed.

"Steve?" I say, prompting him to pop his head back in. "Who changed me last night?"

He smiles, finding my question amusing. "Nat and Wanda."

"Good." I say, "Nothing they haven't seen before."

Steve rolls his eyes as he leans back out. "Get dressed Mia." he says as he closes the curtain.

"Funny, usually you tell me to do the opposite." I say as I start to get off the bed and I hear Steve chuckle on the other side.

Getting dressed is a little difficult. Everything is still a little sore so stretching to take things off and put things on hurts. But I try to keep quiet, not wanting Steve to worry. Once I'm done and dressed I pull open the curtain to find Steve standing there, patiently waiting for me.

"Ready." I say as I look up at him.

He gives me a soft smile before grabbing my chin, holding me in place as he leans down and kisses my lips. I let out a satisfied hum in response, loving that he's getting more comfortable. He slides his hand into mine and then together we walk out.

We find Loki in the waiting room and the three of us head out and back towards the housing complex. I want to ask how Loki has been able to be in parts of the compound that weren't on his original access plan. But I figured with the whole saving my life thing they probably cut him some slack.

We get to the apartment and as soon as we step in I see Tony with his back to us, talking to someone on the phone. 

"She wanted to leave honey, we can't force her to..." He turns around and nearly drops his phone when he sees me. "She's here." he says into the phone. "Pep, she's here."

He hangs up, dropping his phone on the table and he rushes towards me. His arms come around me, holding me tight as I feel his entire body shake. I try not to complain about the slight pain that comes, because getting a hug from my dad is exactly what I needed right now.

"I thought I lost you kid." he says, his voice breaking as he lets out a deep sigh of relief.

"I'm okay dad." I say, trying to calm him down as I hug him back.

Suddenly I hear frantic footsteps coming down the stairs. "Mia!" I hear Pepper cry out and I separate from Tony to see her running towards me.

"Mom." I say, just as she crashes into me and puts her arms around my shoulders.

I can hear Steve let out a groan of disapproval, probably because he's concerned about my injuries. And while yes it did hurt, hearing the agony in my mom's voice as she cries into my shoulder makes me gladly take the pain over stopping her from holding me.

"It's okay." I say to her, hating the panic I hear in her sobs even though I'm right here. "Mom, look at me." I say as I pull away and force her gaze to mine. "I'm okay."

With shaky breaths her hands come up to my face, touching every part of it as if she has to make sure that I'm real. Her eyes drop down and her hand follows, until her finger brush against the cuts along my neck and I see her jaw tremble.

"I love you mom." I say, realizing how close I got to never being able to say that to her again.

She lets out a hard sigh and pulls me back into her arms. This time Tony joins, putting his arms around both of us, holding his family close to him.

And as much as I'm enjoying this, we stay there, for much too long considering Steve and Loki are still in the room with us.

"Dad."

"No." he says, already knowing what I'm going to say. "Yesterday you said we could hug as long as I wanted."

They both squeeze me tighter, and this time I can help the groan of pain as they hit a really sore spot. Immediately they break away, a panicked look on their face as they realize what just happened.

Their words overlap each other as they lay out a string of apologies and words of regret and it takes me a minute to catch up. "It's okay." I say, putting my hands up to try and calm them down. "It was worth it."

Tony puts a hand on my cheek while Pepper reaches down to grab my hand, both of them still wanting to hold me in some way without hurting me anymore.

"You should get some rest." Pepper says, and she looks so tired, I almost want to tell her that.

"I slept for hours." I say, despite the fact that I know it only helped a little.

"And yet you look like you haven't slept in days." Tony says. I haven't had a chance to see myself in the mirror, but I can only imagine I look like hell. I'm about to open my mouth but Tony puts his hand up, cutting me off. "The condition of you leaving the hospital is that you get enough rest and monitor your vitals."

I shouldn't be surprised, but I literally just left the hospital like ten minutes ago. "How do you know the conditions of my discharge?" I ask.

Tony gives me a questioning look. "Did you think you were going to leave the hospital and your father not be immediately informed?"

I guess that's what I was asking for when I decided to change my name. Not that I'm upset about it. He's my dad, he should have been the first one informed.

"Please get some rest." Pepper says, and I can tell this whole thing is still affecting her, even though I keep telling her I'm okay.

Fuck...I must really look bad.

I hate seeing her like this. I can tell by how much her hand shakes that she needs rest as much as I do. "I will if you will." I say, trying to convince her to do the same.

Tony looks over at the woman he loves, and I can see how hard it is for him to see both her and his daughter like this. "She's right Pep. Head back to the room. I'll be there in a bit."

"No, I'm not leaving her." Pepper says, her eyes filling with panic. I'm honestly just glad she wasn't actually here yesterday. I can't imagine what she would have been like if she actually saw me struggling, instead of just hearing about it.

"Mom, it's okay." I say, putting my hand on her arm. "I promise I'll go to my room soon. I just want to see everyone first." It's the truth, I do want to see the others, but more than anything I want my mother to go to her room and maybe finally get some good sleep, now that she's seen me alive and well...or at least alive. "Please go rest."

I can see her hesitation, but eventually she nods her head. "Okay." she says, her hands coming up once again to my face. "I love you honey."

"I love you too mom."

Tony grabs onto her shoulders, guiding her back towards the stairs. I head towards Steve, needing to ask him a very important question.

"Hey, be honest...how bad do I look?"

Steve chuckles as he gives me a confused gaze. "You look beautiful."

I swing my hand at him, hitting him in the chest. "I said be honest."

He sighs as he reaches forward, grabbing my hands in his. "You look like you were attacked, poisoned, and the only way to save you was to give you an antidote that made you beg for death." he says clearly trying to get me to cut myself some slack. "And you look like you fought back, pushed through all the pain, and forced yourself to survive." He slides his hands up my arms until he can rest them on my cheek. "Beautiful." he whispers and then leans his to give me a soft kiss.

Loki clears his throat, obviously wanting to remind us that he's still here.

Steve pulls away, a sly smile on his face. "I thought you were accepting this."

"I am." Loki says. "That doesn't mean I desire to see you flaunting it in front of me."

I can see how much self restraint he's displaying, there's clearly more he wants to do and say. But he's trying his best to be respectful. And we should definitely do the same until he's able to move on.

"Sorry Loki." I say, stepping to Steve's side, wanting to at least stay close to him. I slide my hand down his arm and into his grasp, intertwining our fingers while keeping them hidden between us so Loki can't see.

Tony comes back in after guiding Pepper to the stairs. His eyes immediately find Steve and mine's joined hands and I can see a protective look come across his face.

"This a thing again?" he says, making clear he's not too happy about it.

"It's not a 'thing'. It's my relationship. And yes, we're together again." I say, squeezing Steve's hand so he doesn't feel too bad about Tony's comment.

I see Steve want to say something, and I immediately panic, knowing he probably should hold off for now.

"Connors." we hear someone say, and turn to find an unexpected face.

"Fury?" I say, wondering what he could be doing here.

"It's Stark." Tony says, getting defensive as he corrects him.

Fury smiles, finding it kind of amusing. "I apologize." he says sincerely. "But to avoid confusion, I'll just say Mia." he steps closer as he looks at me. "Glad to see you up and about."

"Aw Fury, you were worried about me?" I tease.

He smiles, but I can see a more serious tone behind his eyes. "Still worried." he says, trying to convey something to us.

"No." Tony says, apparently picking up on something. "She needs to rest, she can not do a debriefing right now."

"Tony this is time sensitive information. We need to be ready if–"

"Give her a chance to recover. This can wait." Tony says, not even letting Fury finish.

"It might not be able to wait." Fury says, and I can see how concerned he is over the whole situation.

Tony steps forward, taking a protective stance in front of me. "All do respect Fury, leave my daughter alone."

I can feel Steve wants to pull me away, clearly agreeing with Tony. Once I see Loki shift forward I really start to get nervous.

I put myself in between everyone to try and keep things calm. "Alright, everybody take a breath. Believe me it's not great when you aren't able to."

I can practically hear Tony, Steve, and Loki all wince.

"Too soon kid." Tony says and I can see the pain in his eyes.

"I'm sorry." I quickly say, not having thought that comment through. "But, Fury's right."

"What?!" The three of them say in unison. And even Fury seems a little surprised.

Steve looks over at me, clearly not liking the idea. "Mia."

I shake my head, knowing it's not really about me right now. "I need to share everything I know. Because as soon as they realize I'm still alive they will be back. He's right, this can't wait."

I can see them all tense up at the idea of another fight, especially considering how this one almost ended.

"You said you were still tired." Loki says, clearly not liking this either.

"I can hold for a bit. This is important." I say. I know nobody here wants a repeat of what happened. We went into that fight unprepared and unexpected, and I know that was my fault. But I can't let that happen again.

I turn to Tony, silently pleading with him to get on board. He gives me a hard glare, but eventually I see him cave.

"Conference room."

Tony calls up the others, telling them to meet us in the nearest conference room for a debriefing. As they all arrive they come to greet me, grateful to see I'm doing okay.

Bucky nearly trips over himself as he runs to me, barely managing to stop as he remembers I'm injured. He hugs me softly, and then tells me he owes me a stronger hug once I've healed.

Nat forgets for a moment, and quickly apologizes when she hugs me tight.

Sam decides to risk his life and gives me a quick kiss on the cheek before Steve can push him away.

I finally get a chance to thank Wanda for saving me out in the mission. She tells me she wishes she had found me faster. But I remind her that I'm alive thanks to her.

Thor gives me as soft of a hug as he can before he and Loki go off to stand against the wall. I imagine Loki isn't comfortable sitting with everyone as part of the team and Thor stays with him for support.

Once everyone has come in Fury stands at the head of the table as he gets ready to begin.

He puts a holo-pad on the table pulling up a projection of faces, and I recognize some of the people we fought during the mission. "We caught a lot of these guys in the incident. Some escaped, including..." He swipes the screen and a picture from the mission comes up, the woman who nearly killed me in the middle of it. "Their apparent leader."

The mere sight of her makes me feel like I can't breathe. "Her name is Velaria."

All eyes turn to me, as mine continue to look at the screen.

"I thought you said you didn't recognize any of them?" Bucky asks, referencing the conversation he and I had before the mission.

"I didn't." I say, wishing I had. "I know her by reputation." The stories I had heard in Revenia about her come to mind. "She's a captain for the Citrelean army. She had always been known for being ruthless, cynical, and sadistic. Based on the way she treated me yesterday, I'm fairly certain that's her."

"The Citrelean being the people who originally attacked Revenia?" Sam asks, just clarifying my words.

"Yeah."

Fury steps back, taking a seat in the chair like everyone else. "Care to elaborate?"

He gives me the floor and I start to stand up before suddenly feeling dizzy. I grab onto the armrest of the chair, catching myself before I fall.

"Mia!" several people call out. And I see hands reach out in my direction. I take a moment to recover before reassuring everyone that I'm okay.

"You don't have to do this right now." Steve says as he slides his hand into mine.

"I'm okay." I tell him, squeezing his fingers before letting go.

I grab a separate holo-pad that Tony prepared for me and set it on the table. "We collected some of the memories that were extracted when I used the machine Tony and Bruce created." I turn on the pad, pulling up a few still shots we took from the memories. I pull the first one up, revealing a group of four men, one in the forefront of the picture, all of them in mid-battle. "That is Senkalth; the king, tyrant, egotistical maniac from Citrelea." I zoom in to another man farther in the back. "That next to him is his general Zaros and I'm assuming the person who's job Velaria is gunning for. She mentioned something about wanting to impress her king."

Everyone leans in, analyzing the picture of something they have heard a lot about, but never seen.

"They weren't wearing those outfits." Nat says, comparing what she's seeing in the picture to what we saw on the mission.

"Or using those weapons." Clint chimes in.

"No, I imagine they were trying to make sure I didn't recognize them." I reply, still wondering how I didn't piece things together.

"I don't get it." Rhodey says. "Why compose such an elaborate ruse. How did they know you would come to that location if they caused problems."

I look over at Fury, knowing he's going to love this. "I figured out who's been working with John."

The realization sets in, and I see everyone sigh, like they should have known this information. I can see everyone's minds working, trying to connect everything that happened before.

"What exactly was their plan?" Bucky asks, still trying to process what happened.

It makes sense that they can't though. No one else was around when I was attacked. Since the attack was for me, I'm the only one who got the whole plan.

"It's actually smart on their part." I say, knowing they had to extensively plan this out in order for it to work. "My family didn't boast our status out to the universe. We didn't really go out and announce ourselves. They probably had no idea what I looked like."

"If John was working with them, wouldn't he have given them a description." Rhodey asks.

I shake my head. "Once John found out about me, he wanted me to join his 'cause'. He probably knew Velaria wanted me dead, so he avoided telling her what I looked like."

I hear Steve sigh, something clicking in his head "Which means the only identifier they had for you was your power." he says, probably remembering the same part of the mission I am. "When everyone started running," he tells everyone else. "That happened right after Mia used her force field."

I nod, remembering how confused we all were when that happened. "So essentially their plan was, lure us to a town with destruction, distract us long enough to figure out which one was me, then signal to the others to run into the forest, knowing we'd follow, they separate so that I'm left alone, and then signal to Velaria where I'm at." It seems so obvious now; the soldier telling them to run, the one I went after pressing her signal once she had me following her, and then her seeming to surrender, but it was only her stalling long enough for Velaria to find me. I should have been able to figure it out.

"Did she inject you with the poison once she found you?" Sam asks, and I can see everyone lean in to listen. Yesterday was so focused on just keeping me alive, I couldn't tell everyone what exactly happened. Although that was mainly because I could barely speak.

"Honestly, I think the poison was a backup plan." I say. Now that I actually have a chance to analyze it, things are starting to really make more sense. "She hit me with a powerful sonic blast that knocked me on my ass, cut my hands so I couldn't shield myself, and she had her hand against my throat." I pause, the memory of all of it still haunting me. "I pushed through the pain and conjured a force field to toss her back. The push back must have caused her to scratch me, and maybe the poison was in her nails or something. But it really looked like she had every intention to kill me then and there. And probably would have if Wanda hadn't shown up." I look over at her, hoping she starts to really understand that. "It was a good plan and if it hadn't been for Loki having a vial of the antidote it would have worked."

I can see the somber looks on everyone's faces as we think about how close I came to dying. And it breaks my heart knowing I'm not the first, or the last person they've had this experience with. Not to mention those they've lost.

"I got really lucky." I say, knowing I have to get even more serious with them right now. "But that just means this isn't over."  I look around at everyone, hating what I'm about to say. "I don't know how long it's going to take her to figure out I'm still alive. But when she does she will come back."

I look down, unable to look at them as I try to find the courage to stay strong. "I can't be here when it happens."

Immediate a string of protest come my way, but it's Steve's "what?!" that comes out the loudest.

"What the hell is that supposed to mean?" Tony says, leaning towards me as if I'm going to go running right now.

I take a breath, knowing this wasn't going to sit well with them. It doesn't sit well with me either, but the guilt is too much for me to keep letting this happen. This is no longer random, this is because of me. "Look guys, my brother pulled this planet into a war you didn't have to be a part of. It was fine when there was seemingly no harm but that's changed now."

Words come from every direction and it's hard to really catch anyone's particular protest.

"So what's your plan here?" Fury says, standing up from his chair and prompting everyone else to quiet down. "You're going to go back to Revenia and expect your people to be a part of another fight when they're probably still recovering from the last one?" he ask rhetorically. "Or are you going to another planet and force them into the same thing you're trying to keep us from?"

"Fury..." I say, not really expecting that response from him. I thought he'd want to get the fight away from here.

"Mia this may not have started as our fight, but it is ours now. Do you actually think we're going to let you go off and deal with this on your own?" Nat asks, and I can tell she's going to give me a real scolding for this later.

Bucky nods, obviously agreeing. "Not to mention the fact that, considering this apparently started since the first attack on Aubrough, the lives lost and damage they have caused are now part of what we need to avenge. Including what they just put you through."

I expected this. Of course they would want to do this. But if any of them got hurt because of this, I would not be able to live with myself. "Guys..."

"If you're in this, we're in this kid." Tony says.

I know it's a long shot, but I need to make one last plea. "Fury, this planet would be in danger, when I'm the only thing they want. I can't ask that of you guys."

"Noted." he replies, then turns to everyone else. "Let's start on our prep work, that way when they come back we'll be ready."
I can see the discussion is over and as much as I wish things could be different, I understand every point they made. I had to know things were going to go this way.

Fury brings up a few folders and placing them on the table, handing some on the top over to Nat, Sam, Clint, and Rhodey. "I have agents in D.C. interrogating the soldiers you guys caught to try and get as much information as we can." he says. "Stark?"

"Yes?" Both Tony and I respond.

"Tony." Fury clarifies, tossing him a file. "Those guns that were confiscated need to be analyzed. They might not use the same type again but if they do we need to be ready to protect against them."

"Banner," he says, sliding Bruce a file. "Try and pinpoint the type of energy surge their portal caused, we need to be able to track it for their return." He looks over at the others at the table. "We also need to find an open are we can fight in. One that will have no risk of civilian destruction or interference."

"Thor, Loki, anything you two know about these people that might be helpful?" Fury asks. They've been fairly quiet this entire time, both of them just observing this meeting as they leaned against the wall.

"As they are not part of the nine realms they aren't people we really dealt with. I don't have an personal knowledge but I will ask some of the elders in Asgard to see if they do." Thor replies.

Fury nods. "Get back to me if you find anything. And Mia..." he says, drawing my attention to him."Rest up. And when you're fully ready, look through your memories of these people and get us any information that might be useful."

This is wrong. If someone gets hurt I–

"Fury..."

He puts his hand up to stop me. "I appreciate your concern but this is your best option. No one will be more prepared then we will. We'll protect both you and your people."

They don't have to do this, but they want to. They shouldn't, but they will. For me. "Thank you." I say to everyone, knowing I can never repay them for what they're risking for me.

"Alright. Get to work." Fury says, dismissing everyone. The group disperses, going to get started on their respective prep work.

Loki and Thor come up to me, both with a sympathetic look. "We promise we're going to do everything we can to help." Loki says, and while I appreciate that from them, I also worry about bringing yet another group of people into this fight.

I'm about to protest, but clearly that's not going to change their mind. "Thank you guys. I appreciate it."

"We'll head back to Asgard tomorrow morning." Thor says, before putting a hand on Loki's shoulder to pull him away.

"Wait." we hear someone call out, and we turn to see Tony coming towards us. He clears his throat, looking a little nervous as his eyes wander over to Loki. "You saved my daughter's life." he says with a grateful look. "I think you've earned yourself a room."

Hell is definitely freezing over.

Loki looks absolutely shocked, and it's clear he never expected Tony of all people to say something like that. "Thank...you." he says, looking like he isn't even sure if he's allowed to say that.

Tony nods, looking just as uncomfortable. "There's a spare bedroom next to the one Thor uses when he spends the night here. You can stay there."

Loki gives him grateful nod before turning to me, and I can't hide my smile. I told him he'd slowly earn their trust, and he's doing just that.

He rolls his eyes as he turns to leave, because he knows how badly I want to say "I told you so". But I can see the smile on his face as Thor puts his arm around him, and I know he's feeling good about this.

"You heard the boss man." Tony says as he comes up to me. "Go to bed."

And like the proper daughter I am, I roll my eyes at him. "Seriously?"

Steve comes up beside me sliding his hand into mine. "I've got her Tony."

Tony looks down at our joined hands, and then back up at Steve. "I've heard that before."

"Dad." I say, getting a little nervous about this. I mean, I understand his hesitancy to trust the man that hurt his daughter. But if I'm willing to let things go, he should too.

I squeeze Steve's hand, hoping Tony's reaction isn't pushing back the progress we made earlier.

I see Tony's eyes drift down to our hands again, before he lets out a sigh. "You sure about this?" he asks, giving Steve another cautious look.

I lean into Steve, making sure my decision is clear. "Yes."

Tony gives us one last look of uncertainty before wiping it away and replacing it with one of acceptance. He comes up to me, putting his hand on my head and pulling me towards him until he can place a gentle kiss on my forehead.
"Make sure she rests Rogers." he says, before turning away and heading towards the door.

"Dad." I shout, and he stops and turns around just as he gets to the door. "I love you."

He smiles, and I can see him get emotional. "I love you too kid." he says, before leaving.

I turn just in time to find Bucky coming towards us with a confused look on his face as he signals down to Steve and mine's joined hands. "I thought you were going to take some time." he says, looking almost upset.

I give him a curious glance. "You never know how much time you're going to have." I say as I look over at Steve. He gives me a soft smile before bringing our hand up and kissing the back of mine.

"I didn't even get a chance to ask Olivia."

Steve turns his head, already looking annoyed. "Ask Olivia what?"

I can see Bucky try to hide his smirk and he pretends to put on a sad face as he shrugs. "I mean, it's not like it matters anymore."

I press my lips together, trying hard not to laugh.

Bucky gives me a flirty look as he steps closer to me. "I also didn't get to finish telling you all the things I would do to you."

Steve tugs on my hand, pulling me away before Bucky can get too close.

Bucky burst out laughing, clearly enjoying himself. "God I missed this." he chuckles out. And before Steve can react he leans in kissing me on the cheek before backing away from Steve's swing.

"Bye Sweetheart!" he calls out as he leaves.

I chuckle as I tug on Steve's hand, leading him out of the conference room.

Despite my protest we head upstairs and I have to beg Steve not to carry me, insisting that I'm not that tired. We head up to the rooms and on instinct I want to head to mine, but I hesitate when we reach Steve's. I don't actually know if he planned to have me sleep in mine or if he assumed I would stay with him.

He looks over at me, and I think he reads the questions on my face. "You can stay wherever you want. Your room, mine, you can stay with Nat if you want." he says. I open my mouth to say something, but Steve quickly cuts me off. "No you can't stay with Bucky."

"Damn." I say, pretending to be annoyed.

Steve rolls his eyes at me. "You know what..." Suddenly he crouches down, grabbing my thighs as he lifts me off the ground. I let out a yelp as wrap my arms around his neck for support, and then he walks us both into his room as I throw my head back laughing.

Once inside he closes the door and then gently sets me down on the bed. "Are you really going to make me go to sleep right now?" I groan.

"Are you really going to tell me you're not tired?" he says with a smug tone that makes me roll my eyes at him. "Just rest at least. I'll be right here at my desk, trying to start on Fury's plan."

"If you want," I say, pulling out the flash drive of my memories I got from Tony. "I have the rest of my memories on here. You can start looking through them and seeing if anything might be useful." I can see the worried look on his face, and I realize there's probably some things from my past he does not want to see. "Don't worry it's just the memories of the battle, you're not going to accidentally run into...you know."

Immediately I can see him calm down. "I can do that." he says.

I'm about to toss him the flash drive when something on his desk catches my eye. A folder. The folder that Ana gave me.

Shit.

I forgot that I came up here before the debriefing and put it on his desk. I figured that whether or not I stayed with Steve I wanted this to be in here for him to read.

"But first..." I say, hating that I now have to be the person to break this to him. "We need to talk about something." I nod my head in the direction of his desk, promoting him to look down. He sees the folder and I can see it on his face when he remembers asking me about it.

"Ana came to see me." I say. "It's what you asked her to find out for you."

His eyes come up to mine and I can see the initial panic. "Have you seen it already?" he ask as he grabs the folder.

I nod my head , which in turn lets him know that he's okay to look at it.

He opens it up, immediately a little confused about what he's seeing. I see his eyes scanning the pictures, trying to piece together what this means. He looks at the other page and as he reads I can see his expression change. The more pages he gets past, the more his face drops. And then it turns darker, angrier, and I know what part he reached.

"Are you okay?" I ask, hating the look on his face.

I see his jaw tighten as he gets to the last page. "No." he responds, and then I see him finish reading. "Oh god." he says, setting them down onto his desk.

"I'm sorry." I say, wishing I could have done something to avoid this happening.

Steve looks up at me with a confused look. "For what?"

I shrug, not exactly knowing but feeling like I needed to say it. "Just...I know Sharon was your friend and learning the truth about someone you thought so highly of must be hard."

"No." Steve says, his tone harsh and cold, but I know it's not directed towards me. He grabs the folder again and holds it up. "The Sharon I thought I knew was clearly some facade she put on to get close to me. This is who she really is. Clearly I never really knew her, which means our 'friendship' never meant anything." He slams the folder back down on his desk, clearly frustrated as he runs a hand through his hair. "I just...feel like an idiot for trusting her."

And that's when I realize what's really bothering him. It's not a disappointment in Sharon, I don't think he cared about her enough anymore. It's guilt. He blames himself for what we went through. He blames himself for what she did.

I stand up, wanting to comfort him. His eyes come up to look at me cautious of what I'm going to do. And he almost looks like he's scared I'm going to leave, like I blame him too.

He watches me as I make my way to him, and I don't think he actually realizes what I'm doing until I sit myself down on his lap. He lets out a sigh of relief as he wraps his arms around my waist, careful not to hurt me, before burying his head in my neck. I slide my hand into his hair, gently caressing his head as he holds me.

"People change. Maybe she was different when you guys first met." I say, trying to make him feel better.

But instead he leans back and gives me a crazed look. "You're defending her?"

"I'm not defending her. I'm just saying, love makes people do crazy shit, clearly."

"She doesn't love me, she never loved me, this isn't love." he says signaling down to the folder on his desk.

"The concept, the fallacy, the idea of love is even worse. She's obsessed with you and she's confused it for love. I'm not excusing her behavior, I just don't want you to blame yourself for it." I put my hand on his cheek, letting my thumb caress his skin. He leans into my touch, and I can feel him take a breath as he calms down.

"You're right." he says, reaching up to grab my hand. He brings it down to his lips, placing a gentle kiss on my palm. "Thank you."

He leans back in resting his head on my chest letting out a deep sigh. I rub my hand up and down his back, trying to soothe him.

"Ana thinks we should report this." I say, knowing it's the last thing about this topic I need to cover. "I just wanted to talk to you about it because it's your phone she hacked into, your privacy she invaded."

I feel him nod his head softly, before leaning back and looking up at me. "I think we should." he says as he brings his hand up and brushes the hair out of my face. "I'll take care of it. I don't want you stressing over this anymore."

I nod, knowing that's probably for the best. "Okay, I'm going to change for bed then." I say, getting up off his lap. I pull the flash drive out of my pocket and place in on the desk for him.

I take off my jacket as I head to his dresser, trying to remember if I still have clothes here. I'm about to open my drawer up when I see Steve crouch down and pick something up off the ground. And as he brings it up I see it in his hands, and my heart drops.

Loki's ring.

Shit. Shit. Shit. I completely forgot about that. No. We just made up. I don't want to fight agai–

"I'm going to put this right here for you, so you don't lose it." he says, setting the necklace and ring down on his desk.

I freeze, unsure if he has any idea what that is. "Steve..." I say, trying not to panic.

"It's okay Mia." he says, and I can see it in the look on his face, he knows exactly what that is.

Dammit. I can't believe I'm doing this again. "No...please just let me..."

"Mia..." Steve says, still trying to stop my explanation.

But I can't let him dismiss this just because he feels like he's not allowed to be upset. Eventually this will get to him and it will be worse if I don't explain this. "It's doesn't mean anything...I just–"

My words are cut off when his hands come to my neck and he presses his lips against mine. I'm caught off guard but I can't help but relax as his soft touch comforts me.

"It's okay." he whispers against my lips. "He asked me for permission to give that to you."

I lean back, knowing I didn't just hear that. "What?"

He chuckles softly as he slides his hands down to grab mine. "We had a lot of time to talk while you were unconscious. In one of those conversations he showed me the ring and asked me if it was okay if he gave it back to you. He explained to me what it meant, and that he understood what it didn't mean."

Oh...okay.... "And you said yes?"

"Well, first I reminded him that you don't need my permission to accept a gift from someone. Second, I told him that it was up to you if you wanted to accept it back. But, if what he was asking for was my blessing, I said it was fine."

I look at him, trying hard to figure out if he's genuinely okay with this, or he's just saying he is to please me. I knew when I took the ring back from Loki that I would have to talk to Steve about it. I was going to explain to him what Loki told me, but if he still had a problem with it, I would give the ring back to Loki out of respect for his feelings.

"You're really okay with this?" I ask him, not wanting to question him, but needing to know that he's not just hiding his true feelings because he's scared. "Be honest with me please." I beg.

He brings his hands back up, cupping my face as he brings me closer to him. "You love me?" he asks, his eyes intently watching me as if he doesn't actually know the answer.

"Yes." I whisper, knowing that even through the hard times I never stopped loving him.

He smiles down at me. "That's all I need." he says before leaning down and pressing his lips against mine.

He's being honest. Which means two things. One: the fact that I've forgiven him shows him that I truly do love him no matter what. Two: whatever talks he had with Loki have convinced him that Loki truly has accepted our relationship, and won't be pursuing me anymore. He's trusts me, and I guess on some level, he trusts Loki.

He finally pulls away from me and lets me get back to changing as he heads to his desk. I open up my drawer and pull out a simple t-shirt and pajama shorts. I contemplate going into the bathroom to change, but then realize that if we're going to get things back to normal, I should be able to change in from of him.

I reach down to pull of my shirt, struggling a little since my body can't stretch very much right now. I manage to get my shirt off so that I'm in the bralette Nat left for me. I turn to find Steve staring at me, but not for the reason I would have thought.

His eyes are filled with horror as he stares at my body. He gets up from his chair and walks over to me, his eyes stuck on the the right side of my rib cage.

I turn towards the mirror and it's then that I notice the large amount of bruising that is left there. I turn in the mirror and see some bruising on my back, probably from being slammed against the tree Velaria had me pinned on. The cuts on my neck are healing pretty well, but they're still visible. Overall it looks worse than it feels, but to someone else I can see how it can be shocking.

"Nat and Wanda told me you had some bruising but, I didn't think it would be this bad." he says, and I can see it hurts him to see me like this.

"It's not that bad." I say, not wanting him to worry.

I see his hand want to move towards me, but he hesitates, holding it back. I reach forward, grabbing his hand and bringing it towards me.

"Mia..." Steve says, not really sure about this, but instead I just step closer to him.

I lay his palm against my side, right over the bruising and I flatten it out. His touch alone immediately feels good, and I reach for his other hand. I bring it up and place it against my neck, right over the cuts. I hear Steve take in a shaky breath, getting emotional over my injuries. But this isn't for him to feel worse, it's to show him that I'm okay. That I'm healing. That his touch gives me strength.

He closes his eyes as he tries to keep calm, his fingers running along my injuries. I lean up and gently press my lips to his, holding it for a few seconds before pulling away.

He smiles as he open his eyes, and then proceeds to help me change so I don't hurt myself anymore. Once I'm in my pajamas he heads back to his desk while I go over to the bed, a little annoyed that I am still very sleepy.

I watch him work as I lay on the bed, seeing him focus through my memories as my eyes slowly start to flutter. And I don't even realize when I officially fall asleep.

***

I feel movement around me, my body shifts on the bed and then I feel a source of heat next to me.

"Steve?" I whisper as I vaguely open my eyes.
"Shhhhh." I hear as the covers come off me briefly, but then cover me up again. "I'm sorry, I was trying not to wake you. Just go back to sleep."

He settles himself next to me and it's then that I realize it's pitch black in his room. "What time is it?" I groan, trying to get myself to actually turn to find a clock.

But Steve's hand comes to my cheek, gently caressing it as he tries to keep me in place. "Don't worry about it. Just rest." he says, wanting to keep me in this sleepy mood.

I decide to let it go and instead I just snuggle close to Steve, sliding my hand up his stomach until I can rest it on his chest. He puts his arms around me and holds me close to him.

"Steve?"

"Yes?"

"I love you."

I hear him let out a sigh as his arms tighten around me. "I love you too."

I whine, not hearing the words that I wanted. "No, say it the right way."

He lets out a nervous groan as his body tenses up. "Mia..." he says, and I can hear it in his voice, he's afraid to say it. After what he did he doesn't feel like it's right. But it's something we have to get over if we're going to work towards what we used to have.

I tilt my head up not really sure if he can even see me in the darkness. "Please." I beg, needing this more than I thought I did. "Please."

He sighs, and I can tell he's trying to push past the fear so he can give this to me.

"I love you more."

I smile, that phrase warming me in a new way. I turn my head so that I can place a gentle kiss on his chest, right over his heart. "Debatable."

***

I feel the bed shift underneath me, and it pulls me from my sleep. As I start to come to I can kind of hear noises next to me. The bed shifts again and I realize that the noises kind of sound like someone is in pain.

I open my eyes, trying to figure out if this is real or if I'm imagining it. "Steve?" I say, wondering if he's hearing this.

"Mia...no." I hear him whisper, and I start to get a little concerned.

I try to sit up, my eyes adjusting to the darkness and I start to see Steve, eyes closed, but looking like he's in distress. "Steve..."

"Please...don't die."

Shit. He's having a nightmare.

I come up, putting my hand on his shoulder. "Steve wake up." I say. I don't want to startle him, but clearly he's dreaming about something bad. He whimpers as he continue to toss and turn.

"Mia...come back to me." he says and I see his chest rising and falling in hard heavy breaths. He's starting to panic.

"Steve." I say, shaking him a little more.

"No!" he shouts his body suddenly shifting forward as he wakes up. "Mia!" he cries out and he's hyperventilating as he frantically tries to figure out what's happening, continuously calling out my name.

I put my hands on his shoulder as I try to get him to realize where he is. "Hey, I'm right here." I say, as I slide my hands up to his cheeks, forcing his gaze forward. "Look at me. I'm right here, I'm okay."

He's still frantic, even as he looks at me, and I can see it in his eyes, his mind is trying to convince him that this isn't real. His hand reaches out, resting on my cheek as he tries to figure out if I'm actually there.

"Mia." he whimpers, and I can see he's starting to understand. There's tears in his eyes and based on what he was saying I can only assume his mind was twisting what happened yesterday. And I think in his dream, I did die.

"I'm here." I say to him, wiping his tears away.

And with his breathing still accelerated he leans in, crashing his lips to mine. I gladly take him, feeling a rush of desire run through me. I slide my hand into his hair, fisting it in my fingers as I pull his mouth closer.

I pull down, tugging him with me until my back hits the bed. With his mouth still consuming mine Steve leans over me, placing one knee in between my legs and the opposite arm next to my head, trying to support himself so he isn't putting his body weight on top of me.

I can feel myself getting desperate; the separation we faced and the near death experience I had reminding me of how close we came to not being together anymore. And all I can think about right now is how much my body wants him. How much I need him.

I bring my hands down, finding the hem of his shirt and sliding underneath him until my fingers can run along the lines of his defined muscles.

"M-Mia." Steve stutters, and I can feel him tense up. But he continues to kiss me, his tongue sliding in between my lips to sweep against mine.

I moan into his mouth, as my body shifts lower until I can feel his thigh press in between my legs. I grind my hips, feeling the sweet delicious friction against my center, causing me to moan again.

"Fuck Mia..." Steve groans out, but along with the clear desire, I can hear the hesitancy. "We...we can't." he says, and then starts to pull away from me.

"No." I whine as I desperately clutch onto him. "Please don't stop." I beg. I pull him back to me, claiming his mouth and showing him just how badly I want him.

"You're still healing." he says as he starts to lift off of me.

"It's okay." I say, as I hold onto him. "I'm okay. Please." I beg.

I can see he's still worried, but the desire in his eyes takes over and he leans back in, kissing me hard. I bring my hands back to his shirt, lifting it up, and this time I start to pull it up. He backs so he can take his shirt off and then brings his hand down to help me with mine. He  helps me slide one arm out of it's sleeve, and then brings it over my head and down my arm so that I don't have to stretch my injured side too much.

He looks down at me, his eyes briefly looking over my bruises. I try to distract him by reaching down and grabbing the waistband of my shorts and I start to pull them down. It works, and Steve's eyes travel down and then his hands come to help me. After that he pulls his own pants down until we're both completely naked.

He leans down again, his lips finding mine as he settle himself in between my legs. I'm practically squirming with need and anticipation as he reaches down and places himself at my entrance.

He pushes himself in and we both gasp at the sensation. I can feel it in both of our bodies, there so many pent up emotions that one thing is very clear; this is going to be quick.

I wrap my legs around him as he starts to thrust into me, his lips coming down to kiss my neck. He hits the right spot in both places and I can't help but throw my head back and let out a loud moan.

Immediately Steve brings his hand up, putting it over my mouth to try and silence me.

"Fuck." he groans out, his hips still pushing into me. "We didn't...mmm...we didn't soundproof." he pants as he removes his hand from my mouth. "You have to keep quiet."

He props himself up on his hands, but keeps his body close to mine. I can feel him already getting close as my own orgasm builds. He's trying to control his thrusts, but I can feel him getting lost in the passion.

"Mia." he moans as he picks up his pace.

"Yes." I pant, knowing it's only been a few days, but I fucking missed this.

"Mia." he moans again, and I feel like the memory of his dream is starting to come back to him.

"I'm right here baby." I whisper as I grab his face and force his eyes on me. "I'm still yours Steve."

And my words push him over the edge. He buries his face in my neck to muffle his cries as he pushes into me so deep that I come immediately after. I have to bite down on my bottom lip to stop from screaming and I clutch his body to mine as his hips slow down, grinding into me as we both ride out our orgasms.

We're both left panting and in order not to put his weight on me Steve wraps his arm around my waist and turns us both so that he can fall onto his side while keeping me tight against him. We take a moment to catch out breaths, trying to process that very unexpected moment.

Steve pulls out of me before sliding his hand along my cheek, brushing my hair back and away from my face. "Are you okay?" he asks once he finally has his breath back. I nod because I am so much better than okay.

"I'm sorry." he says as he leans in and kisses my forehead. "I dreamt that..." he pauses not even wanting to repeat it.

"I know." I say. "Well, I can guess."

I run my hand across his stomach, bringing it around his waist as I snuggle closer to him. He lets out a content sigh as he wraps his arms around me, holding me close to him as we settle in to finally have a good nights sleep for the first time in days.

And I can feel it between us, things finally feeling like normal again.

But for how long will this peace last...

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Can't believe I actually finished on time. Thank god for long lines at Disney lol. The next chapter will probably be a little later than two weeks though but I'll try my best not to take too long.

Thank you guys for reading and thank you for your well wishes, I'm having a blast on my trip.

Hope you enjoyed, finally a calm chapter lol.

I love you all 3000.