With joy filling every cell of my body, I stormed after the gray female wolf who ran through the giant woods of Canada. Right behind us was the light brown coloured wolf that almost caught up to me.
Naika and Toby Ramsay. They were part of my host family here in Canada.
I sprinted, with my white paws and my creamy fur that had some white speckles like the ones of a fawn, between the two of them.
The last two years were really good to me. Even though sometimes some random stuff happened.
The pack was tolerant and that, although I had those scars. It happened unexpectedly but the Alpha of this pack saw my traitor mark. But against my expectations of immediately killing me, he let me explain and pitied me for them.
His tolerance probably came because of his own traitor mark.
His father was a selfish man and wanted to hinder his son to be the new Alpha. That's why he attacked his son and marked him with long scars on his back.
It wouldn't be long until I would lose this tolerance and acceptance. Because not long from now I would fly back.
This was only our last trip through the forest and a goodbye from the siblings who were like brother and sister to me. Even though Toby was my first kiss, what also happened unexpectedly. But that was a story for another time.
He liked men like I did, but he liked his best friend Fynn who was two years younger than him and was only 17 years old. On the day Fynn turned 18 we all expected that Fynn and Toby would turn out as mates.
Naika didn't like men but women. In our school we were called the homo trio. It was funny because here you didn't get judged but accepted.
Here I felt comfortable and truth to be told, I wanted to stay here.
Howling, I laid my head in my neck and both siblings joined, even some wolves further away howled with us.
My flight was in a few hours and tomorrow I would be back in Germany. If everything fit, I would be back to the beginning of school.
In the yard of the Ramsay home, I turned back into a human and drove my finger through my dyed brown hair. I liked them in combination with my brown eyes, but they were still as uncontrollable as before.
My stature was kind of perfect - in my opinion.
Muscles where they should be and not too many and not too less. A fine six pack and not exaggerated. Muscular legs and arms. But my back wasn't broad, I didn't look like one of those walking cabinets.
If I wore a wig and a dress, I could be seen as a woman. From behind that is.
More of an athletic stature than a muscular one.
»That was refreshing, right?«
With a bright grin Toby put his arm around my shoulders and ran his fingers through his light brown hair.
Our clothes didn't rip with our transformation and I was thankful for that. However, it was still a mystery where they went and one I didn't want to get behind.
Smiling, I pushed Toby's arm away and mounted the terrace to get inside the house.
»Your suitcase is packed?« Naika asked. She was almost two heads smaller than I. Her dark brown ringlets were short and just reached her shoulders. »Everything's packed.«
Satisfied, she nodded and grabbed my guitar case. »I want to listen to you playing one last time, before it's too late!« Determinant, she looked up to me and Toby whistled in agreement.
»I want to hear it too,« May said. She was the mother of the siblings and behind her stood Maxim, the father. Both of them became my parents too in the two years I was here.
Sighing, I fetched my guitar out of the case and sat down on the couch. Slowly my fingers played over the chords and I lost myself in the play.
I forbid my voice from starting to sing with the melody. I hadn't sung for a long time and I didn't want to, even though I missed it painfully.
The fascinated faces were easy to ignore and I returned to my own world.
Just when the song ended, I returned to reality and looked at the others with a blurry sight.
Joyous, Naika clapped her hands and sent me back to reality completely. »I'll miss that,« Toby grumbled, and I smiled.
If I didn't know better that my family was at another place, I would think they were my siblings and parents.
In those two years I didn't have any contact with my family.
Elli wanted it like that, even though it was hard for herself to break off our contact. She wanted to give me the chance to fully lose every connection to our pack.
That was the reason why I changed my phone number and got another phone - just to be safe.
I put the guitar, the siblings got me for my 18th birthday, back into its case and lifted the case on my back.
»It's time,« I said as I looked at the clock and needed to sigh automatically.
Over the last two years I tried teaching the Ramsay family some German and to some limit they could talk well. Writing was another story but talking and understanding was good.
Maxim took my suitcase as we left the house and got into the car to drive to the airport.
Silently we walked through the giant airport and stopped at the point where they couldn't come with me anymore.
The siblings hugged me tightly in their arms just like their parents.
»Visit us someday. It's going to be boring without you.« Smiling, May tousled my hair and I accepted it with a smile although I hated her for doing that. »I'm not the one to refuse that offer, Ma.«
»And don't you dare not to give us a call!« Naika yelled and punched me against my upper arm. Smiling, I rubbed the place.
»Well, then you need to visit me too.« Agreeing to that, the siblings nodded before they wrapped me tightly in their arms again.
»Take care of yourself.«
The last one to say goodbye was Maxim who also tousled my hair. »Be good in your studies until and after you graduate.« Smiling, I nodded. »Don't worry, Pa!«
Unwieldy, I let go of them and walked through the gate before I got on the airplane.
On my flight to Canada two years ago I was like an excited kid looking out of the small window, even though I was sick with a fever, but now I slept through the safety briefing and the whole flight.
And I was thankful for that. I suffered from claustrophobia – the fear of small rooms.
When I arrived in Germany, school would start on time in my hometown. My first plan was that I would go to school on the next day, but I went with my second plan.
With that, I could get a first look at the situation without everyone knowing who was back. My scent would have completely faded, and my hair was dyed in another color.
But if I first went home everybody from the pack would know that I was back.
And I didn't want that.
***
Tiredly, I dragged my body out of the airplane and blinked towards the already blinding sun.
My flight took off at midday in Canada but now it was morning in Germany – it should be night by now in Canada.
My pack lived in the Black Forest and claimed a giant territory as their own. My flight arrived in Stuttgart.
Yawning, I climbed in the next free cab and drove to my village. I directed my driver to my school, paid him and got out of the car.
With my suitcase in one hand and my guitar case on my back, I walked towards the building and took a final deep breath. Today I would face my past.
Just when I entered the school grounds some people began to whisper, and I felt eyes on me. No surprise with the suitcase dragging behind me.
Without showing an expression I walked to the office and knocked on the door.
»Good morning.« Surprised the young man behind the desk looked up and smiled friendly at me.
It seemed like the old chubby lady didn't work here anymore.
»Good morning. What can I do for you?«
The old woman could probably have recognized me, even with my brown hair and after two years. She had a photographic memory, so it always seemed to me.
»Uh, yes. Kyran Crimson. I'm back from my time abroad and now back for my last year at this school.«
»Ah, certainly. One moment, I will print out your timetable. You are in the same class you once were, and they are in the same classroom as before.« Silently I nodded and leaned against the doorframe.
So right from the beginning in the same class as Cassian.
»Could I leave my suitcase here? It could get uncomfortable if I dragged it with me all day.« Asking, I pointed at my suitcase and the young man looked puzzled at it.
»Did you come right from the airport to school? Yes, of course, you can leave it here.«
»A hard-working student comes even then,« I said and made him lift the corner of his lips in amusement.
»Good, then, here is your printed timetable and the numbers for your locker. Your first lesson is in your classroom, as I see it right here. You should get your books in time from the teachers. Have a good time.«
Inside myself I thanked him sarcastically for wishing me a good time in my own personal hell, but in reality, I thanked him with a friendly smile.
For a long time, I wore a facade and rather ate up comments than to speak them out. Sometimes it was better that way. My sarcasm wasn't always welcome.
My time in Canada changed me and now I needed to get used to my old self, just to not lose myself.
I took a pencil and a notepad out of my suitcase. Actually, I had more suitcases, but they came with the express delivery because I couldn't take four suitcases on a plane.
Silently, I looked at my timetable while I walked to my locker.
Swimming was included in my lessons. Not that I had something against swimming, not anymore, but I couldn't let anyone see my scars. I needed to come up with something.
»Did you see the new student already? He is so damn hot.«
Naturally I heard the whispers of the girls and needed to pull myself together to not laugh.
Ladies, I'm already taken by handsome men, not you.
»And he has a guitar case on his back! If he can sing too. Hach!«
I stopped in front of my locker and eavesdropped amused on the girls.
»Look, that's him! His hair looks so good on him. But with his hot looks he probably has a girlfriend already.«
»Don't be disappointed. We don't know if he has a girlfriend or not.«
I entered the combination of numbers, just to be sure I had the right locker before I locked it again and wanted to turn around but stopped when I heard a familiar voice.
»Who has a girlfriend?« That was Jackson.
»Duh, the new guy!« one of the girls barked.
»We have a new student?« That was Ethan.
»Yes! There he is!« another girl yelled loudly.
»Not so loud, he will hear you!«
A loud clap sounded, and I assumed that one of them hit the yelling girl on the back of the head.
»There?« Ethan asked, confused. »No way.«
Did he already figure it out? But Ethan always had a keen sense of smell and I feared that the most.
My only choice was to play dumb and act not to know him or the others.
Expressionless, I wanted to walk away from my locker and them and go to my classroom when a loud voice shouted through the hallway.
»Hey! I know you eavesdropped on us, new guy!«
I stopped instantly and closed my eyes with a deep breath. Okay, think of something, Kyran!
Loud stomping noises sounded before a hand landed on my shoulder.
Sadly, I didn't want to react that way but I was used to it because of Fynn - so to defend myself.
I grabbed his hand and threw him over my shoulder before I sat on his hip and closed my fingers tightly around his throat.
With wide eyes he looked in my brown eyes and I jumped back and stood up.
»Damn that wasn't cool at all.« He jumped onto his legs and ran his fingers through his dyed blue hair. Just gazed at the skin I just strangled carefully with his thumb.
»Here we are after two years and you just toss me over your shoulder as if I weigh nothing. I didn't expect that from you. Mostly not that you would dye your hair brown. But it looks good on you, even though your blond hair looks better. Looked cute together with your eyes. Not my words, I just quote Flora. But say, what are you doing here, Kyran?«
And with this he had me exposed and that in front of all those people. I should have just gone home. Or even better, I should have never come back.
»Returned for my last year and getting my graduation here instead of abroad,« I answered and grabbed the strap of my guitar case.
»Ha... Everybody thought you would stay away forever because you were so sick or were already...« He cleared his throat. »Say, are you doing better now?«
It was awkward hearing Ethan talk so much. Even more so when I didn't want to talk with anyone. And either way, it was awkward talking to my former best friend.
But his question and words were unusual.
I was fine now but it took me months to not get a fever or some other diseases and I still sometimes got sick.
Still, why did he ask? We weren't friends anymore. Why should he ask then? With what right?
»Wait a second. The Kyran? Kyran Crimson?« one of the girls asked.
»Alive and in full size, Mary,« Ethan confirmed and grinned brightly at her as if he was a child that finally found a long-lost toy.
»So, the gay Kyran who threw up on the school floors?«
My expression went dark the second I heard those words. And out of the corner of my eye, I saw an icy shadow cast across Ethan's face as well
»Yes, that exact Kyran I am. And that Kyran says goodbye now. I want to go to class, the lesson is almost starting.«
Bewildered, the people in front of me looked at me.
They weren't used to my cold and hard voice. But they should get used to it because I didn't plan to talk in any other way with them.
I wasn't the same one I was two years ago.
[Authors Note]
Kyran Crimson in his wolf form
Well, he is muccchhh bigger but this is the coloring of his fur.