-warnings: sexual harassment, attempted dubious consent, drinking, smoking, mentions of self harm, drugs, death, gruesome details of violence and gore, not for the weak
-the chapter is intended to be confusing and meant for you to delve into a deeper psychologically darker place (this chapter is gonna ease you into the darker themes/content that is yet to come) So it's meant to fuck with your mind a little. ALSO THX FOR 70k!!!
also aria's death is based off two ppl I knew that died the same way. I'VE BEEN SEEING THE OUT OF POCKET COMMENTS YOU FREAKS 💀
-☾-
The sound of music blared in your ears. A grotesque rap song objectifying women and glorifying murder to be precise.
You made your way down the stairs of that frat house. The boy you just hooked up with upstairs was begging for a second round, but you were too sober to give it another go and pretend to enjoy it again.
Not to mention he was a sophomore at Stohess State University, the college you planned to attend this upcoming fall.
A bunch of kids from your class were greeting you and patting you on the shoulder playfully as you passed them. This was one of the last times you all would get to be together like this. Who knew what would happen after graduation?
You noticed the brunette you'd been looking for standing by the downstairs bathroom, "Aria!"
Upon hearing your voice, she turned around, lighting up when she saw you, "There you are. I thought you were upstairs with that college guy."
"I was."
The flashing colorful lights streaked across her face, "And?"
"He came like thirty seconds in. Waste of a condom," you sighed, following her into the bathroom where two other boys from your class were smoking in the empty bathtub.
"Oh my God," Aria laughed, tearing up and already in the process of rolling a blunt. "I'm going to help you find the perfect boy so you'll fall in love. Then you'll get dicked down everyday."
"A boyfriend?" you cocked a brow. "No thanks. I'm perfectly fine with fucking without any commitment."
"I could help you with that," one of the boys grinned from the bathtub.
You and Aria rolled your eyes. The other kid held up a small packet filled with a white powdery substance, "Hey, Y/n, can I do a line off your tits as a graduation gift?"
"Ew, Josh, no," you said, scrunching your face. "I told you I don't like being near that shit either."
"Aria?" Josh looked at your friend.
"I have a boyfriend," she replied flatly. "And I also don't like that shit. You seriously think they're gonna let a cokehead stick needles in their puppies? And did I mention already that I'm with Thomas?"
You audibly groaned. Aria looked at you and you said, "What?"
"You need to get to know him better," she insisted. "Then you'll love him too."
You rolled your eyes, "Yeah right. He's cheated on every girl he's dated. You're out of his league."
"Aww, is my best friend jealous of not getting all my attention?" she smiled, pinching your cheeks.
"No," you scowled. "I'd rather you give your attention to someone worthy of it. I'll find you the perfect guy."
"Yeah, yeah," she waved off. "Let's just smoke. You're too tense."
Something strange, like an icy wind, flowed through your veins. A little voice in the back of your head spoke in a whisper. I don't smoke.
"I don't smoke," you said, repeating that strange ghostly whisper in your mind.
Aria raised a brow, "Um, yes you do. You smoke more than anyone I know."
You blinked, shaking your head and gathering your thoughts, "I don't know why the fuck I just said that. Light me up, Rall."
She grinned, placing the blunt between your lips and lighting it for you. You closed your eyes, letting them roll to the back of your head, stealing a drag. Aria took a sip from her red Solo cup, her eyes were on you.
"You heard from Petra?" you asked trying to divert her gaze.
"Talked to her on the phone a few hours ago," Aria replied. "She told me about that guy she met a while back. They're looking for apartments together."
"Hey, that's good," you bumped her shoulder supportively. "Your parents were praying for her to start settling down."
Aria and Petra's parents unfortunately weren't college educated. They didn't even have high school diplomas because of their own shortcomings in their own homes. They had been working strenuous hours at physical labor jobs to provide for their girls. They wanted their daughters to gain the educational opportunities they could not, so they worked hard to put them in one of the best schools in the city despite how expensive tuition was.
Needless to say, the Ralls were very humble people. They knew the value of hard work. Petra was off in Shiganshina for an internship after she graduated from a law school in Trost. Aria wanted to go to school for animal science. Her dream was to become a veterinarian. She worked hard to get into Stohess State University like you had.
"I know. But Petra and I are opposites. She never wanted to settle and settling down is all I think about," she said. "You think I'll get to have that with Thomas?"
You stared at her, unable to respond before she was already shaking your shoulders, "Ooh! What if you end up getting married before me? What if you meet someone at college and you fall in love and forget me?"
"Forget you?" you quizzed. "I'd never forget you."
"Oh, you're just saying that," she waved her hands playfully while grinning.
"Kiss! Kiss! Kiss!" the boys called from the tub.
You looked over at them with a scowl, "I like you guys better when you're sober. It's hard to believe you're the valedictorian and the salutatorian."
They shrugged and Aria said, "Maybe you'll marry Zeke."
"Zeke?" you jumped. "He's like my brother! And he's almost four years older than me, that would never happen."
"Come on," she shoved you. "He's hot!"
"Okay! But I can't go for him!" you shoved back. "He sees me as his little sister."
"Jaeger?" Mikey, the other kid in the tub asked. When Aria nodded, he looked at you, "Go for his little brother. He's got the same fuck and ditch agenda you want. Who knows? Maybe you'll be the lucky girl to make him settle down."
"He'd be the lucky one," Josh said. "Have you seen Y/n?"
You smiled, and Mikey was the one to say, "Yeah, but that's what I'm saying. She's probably the only girl that could make a guy like that cool down."
You rolled your eyes while Josh commented, "He was fucking Lara—"
"I'm gonna go look for Thomas," Aria placed her hand on your shoulder. "Don't get lost, okay?"
She rushed out into the crowd and you sighed, "Alright guys, see you at graduation next week. Don't fuck up your speeches."
"See ya, Y/n," they saluted.
You left the bathroom, still smoking as you plopped down on a couch in the living room. You wanted nothing more than to go home and knock the fuck out. Hopefully once Aria found Thomas, you could convince her to leave early with you.
You blew out a puff of grey, leaning your head back on the couch and thinking to yourself. You and your mother had a huge argument a few hours ago. As usual, your father's lack of involvement in the house made her mood worse. Their marriage was collapsing, and their fights would in turn be thrown onto you and your brothers.
"Hey, I've been looking for you," a voice to your left said.
Slowly, you pried your eyes open and saw Thomas sitting there. He grinned and you retracted in your seat involuntarily. Everything about him made you extremely uncomfortable. Whenever he was around, you always wanted to get away.
"Aria was looking for you," you told him, your head feeling too heavy for your body.
"Let her keep looking," Thomas waved his hand. He scooched closer to you, making you cringe. "You're the one I wanted to talk to."
"Did you?" your eyelids were drooping over your irises, making you looking both sleepy and uninterested.
"Yeah," he nodded like he was proud of it. He was now right next to you, leaving a few inches of space between. "You want a drink?"
He flashed a silver flask at you. You stared at the flask, wanting to just get up and walk away without a single word to this creep. Who knew what he had in that flask? Maybe some weird ass magical love potion that made Aria fall for him. Or something that would make taking advantage of you easier...
Taking a deep breath, you shook your head, "Nah, I'm driving later. I can't drink."
"But you can smoke?" he cocked a brow.
"It's just pot," you replied, irritated. "I sober up quick. It doesn't fuck with your mind the way liquor does."
He shrugged, chugging down the contents of the flask, "You want some, then you let me know."
"Thanks, but I'm good," you began looking around the room for Aria. If Mason found out you were at a party, he would waste no time in snitching and breaking a bone or two. The sooner you could get out of here, the better.
"So, what're your plans after graduation?" he suddenly asked.
"College."
"Where?"
"Here."
"So we'll still be in the same school," he smiled. Oh, god how you hated that stupid fucking smile. He got closer, touching your arm, "How about we go up upstairs and talk some more?"
"Um, no," you looked at him like he was psychotic. Backing away, you quizzed, "Are you insane?"
"What?" he said like nothing was wrong.
"You've got to be kidding," you glowered. "Why in the fuck would I do that? I'd never have sex with you. You're dating my best friend."
"Aria doesn't have to know," he quietly replied as if it were reassurance. His hand reached yours.
"No, let me rephrase," you slapped his hand away. "I hate you. I would never ever want to do anything with you."
"Fuck you, bitch," he venomously hissed.
"You'd like that, wouldn't you?" you chuckled, and he scowled. "Aw, get your little feelings hurt?" you fake pouted. Your face then fell flat as you glared, "You're just a pathetic little man. Thinks with his dick and lacks a brain."
Angrily, he gripped your arm, "Shut up. If you come up with me, I won't tell Aria you were throwing yourself at me."
"Are you actually trying to manipulate me into sleeping with you?" you angrily quizzed.
"What? You think I wouldn't tell her?" Thomas threatened.
You wriggled yourself free from him and stood up, "Don't touch me. I don't know what Aria sees in you but I was trying to get myself to like you for her sake. She'd never look your way again after I tell her about this."
"You're not going to tell her anything," he growled. "If you do, I'll—"
Before he could finish, you had grabbed the drink from a frat kid's hand and tossed it in Thomas's face. You didn't know why but you were hit with an awful pang of déjà vu. It felt familiar and nice, like you were born to dramatically throw drinks on people.
Thomas looked all sorts of appalled. You couldn't bring yourself to care any less because you were walking away. You began to look for Aria, wanting desperately to get out of here. One of your friends, Mina, bumped into you.
"Y/n! Hey, where you going? You look spooked."
"I'm just not feeling well," you answered. "I need to go home. Have you seen Aria?"
"She's outside I think, looking for Thomas," Mina told you. "Are you good to drive?"
"Yeah," you replied. "I haven't drank anything. I'm a bit buzzed but I barely even smoked. Some dumbass ruined my high."
She handed you a water bottle, "Well this should help sober that last little part of you up. See you at grad."
You waved at her and opened the bottle of water while continuing your search outside. You ended up seeing her hanging out by the pool with someone from Utgard Academy as well.
"Come on," you patted her shoulder. "We're leaving."
"Now?" she raised her brows. You nodded, tugging her and she cried, "But it's the last party before grad! We gotta stay!"
"Dude, please," you looked at her pleadingly.
She caved, "Okay. What's bothering you?"
While walking towards the car, you kept your eyes low. She always knew when something was up. Then again, the two of you were always cheery around others, being with each other alone made it easy to let your walls down. She was your person. And you were hers.
"I need to talk to you," you mustered the courage to say.
The two of you were halfway down the street by your car. Far away from the party as Aria got into the passenger seat.
"What's up?" she looked your way expectantly as you hopped to the driver's seat and started the car, turning into the street.
"I—it might be a bit shocking," you warned.
She slumped in her seat tiredly, "I got a few drinks in me, I should be fine."
You sighed stopping at a red light, highly doubting her. As her house was father away from the college than yours was, you'd have to drive past your house. Surprisingly, you felt perfectly fine while driving. No spinning lights or glares or anything.
You glanced over at her as you were taking a right turn, "Put your seat belt on."
"I will," she said childishly. "Let me finish texting Thomas first."
"You're way too good for a guy like him," you told her, eyes locked on the road.
"Y/n, we've been over this—"
"I know! I know! But listen!" you insisted.
"No! He's my boyfriend and I love him! Why can't you just be happy for me?" she quizzed.
"Because he's a horrible person! He treats you like shit and never considers doing anything unless it benefits him!" you yelled. "And . . . and . . ."
"And what?" she shouted. "And fucking what?"
"He came on to me at the party!" you blurted, your hands tightened around the wheel.
She was quiet. All you could hear was your breathing, not even sure if she still was. Then she finally whispered, "Oh my god."
You closed your eyes for a second, "Listen, Ari. He's not worth it. You deserve someone a million times—"
"Oh my god. I can't believe you would make shit up about him!"
"What?" your eyes widened.
She pointed at you furiously, "You have hated him since day one. You never even gave him a chance and all because you're jealous that I'm happy!"
"Woah! What!?" you looked at her. "That's not true. Of course, I want you to be happy. Why would I be rooting against you?"
"You don't want me to be with anyone!" she said. "You find problems in every guy I like. Now that I'm in love with someone who I can have a future with, you are so terrified I'll leave you behind!"
"Are you serious?" your voice broke in unsurmountable anger.
"Yes!" she snapped. "You think I'm some kind of idiot?! Some child that doesn't fucking know anything with my head in the clouds?"
"What?" you gawked. "No!"
"Just because you aren't capable of feeling any romantic emotion towards a man doesn't mean you get to crap all over me if I do."
"I'm not lying! I would never lie about something that serious!" you screamed.
"I know you," she lowly said. "You are still holding onto freshman year when your brother hurt you and made you break up with that boy. You're holding onto it and refusing to let anyone else feel happy just because you don't have the capability to love!"
Silence.
You didn't even look at her as your heart shattered into a thousand pieces. You passed your house, driving onto the backroads that led towards hers.
"I'm dropping you off at your house, and that'll be it. I never want to see you ever again," you furrowed your brows while still keeping a gaze straight ahead.
Your eyes didn't float to hers and you were sure to never let her meet your eyes again. Out of every human being to have walked this earth, words that powerful coming from her mouth had torn every versatile meaning of pain out from the fabric of your existence. Every other moment of 'pain', of deceit, had lost all meaning.
This, just this was betrayal.
The air stilled, any motion of wind or ventilation had paused. Or maybe it was just in your imagination that any means of sound had vanished because it sure felt that way.
"Oh god. I am so sorry," Aria's voice cracked once she realized the weight of her words. "I—I am so stupid. I didn't mean that. Oh god, Y/n. I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry he did that to you and that I doubted you for even a second."
You didn't look at her or say anything. Dead set in what you had told her last, you had no intention of changing your mind so soon.
"Y/n, please look at me. I'm sorry," she pleaded desperately. "I'm such a moron! You know how I am—I have a big mouth and just say whatever without even thinking! I try to be like you—someone who thinks carefully about everything but I'm just an idiot! I'm sorry."
Not a word from you.
"Y/n," she begged. "Please, you're my best friend. I love you the most out of everyone I know. I know you'd never lie about something like that. I just got sad . . . I really wanted him to love me the way I wanted—the way I was willing to love him but hearing that he did something like that, I just reacted the dumbest way possible."
You didn't look at her.
"You never lie to me about anything and I can't believe I doubted you for even a second," she was tearing up, you could hear it in her voice. "I can't believe he tried to do that with you. I'm sorry. I'll leave him. I'll never let any man come between us or hurt you ever again. I promise. I love you. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry."
You turned onto Eden Lane.
"I didn't mean it," she sobbed. "Of course you can love. You love Theo so much—you're so good with him! And—and even your family despite whatever hell you've been put through. And—and me! You love me even though I'm an idiot loudmouth who acts first and thinks later. You love me like a sister—the way Petra loves me—even more than that!"
"So please—please forgive me." She begged. "And please don't say you never want to see me again—because I'd rather die than lose you."
[play "as the world caves in" by matt maltese]
Dammit Aria. Just let me be stubborn. Just for once. Let me be angry. Let me be alone. Let me cool off. I'll have time to forgive you later. I'll never have time to be as angry at you as I want.
Your mother's voice chimed. Bottle your emotions, Y/n. No one likes an emotional girl.
Just this once, you wanted to let yourself be angry. You were sick of being forgiving without the other person working hard enough for it.
You could hear her pleading, begging, sobbing, but you refused to give in. You kept your eyes straight on the road, not looking towards her at all.
A glaring light on the opposite end of the street came into view. Squinting in response to the high beams, you tried to keep yourself from getting distracted.
It was then you realized the car was crossing over towards your side. Your eyes widened and you tried slamming on the breaks and honking.
They say your life flashes before your eyes in moments like this. Whoever "they" are, could not be more wrong.
The world was in fast motion, skipping seconds and intervals of time long enough to have a coherent thought.
What do I do? What do I do? Do I turn into the other lane? No, what if the other car turns back onto it? Why isn't my car stopping already?
All you could hear was a loud crash, glass shattering, and a blood curling scream. You weren't sure if it belonged to you or Aria, but all you were sure of was the pain in the left side of your body.
The sound . . . the ear-piercing, earth-shattering noise of it all. It was terror that could be heard in each corner of the world, the bottom of each sea. The world had been torn open and you were left there alone.
Breathing heavy, you opened your eyes and looked down, beginning to hyperventilate. Your neck felt like a thinning thread, on the verge of snapping by even the slightest touch. Bearing through the pain and discomfort, you looked down. Crimson tainted your skin, glass clung to it. Shards of it had impaled your stomach, making you let out a gut wrenching and violent scream. Followed by another. Then another.
Why didn't the airbags go off?
Your vision was a bit blurry, pain hammered even in your bloodshot eyes. The whiplash had left your head ringing and your body aching. Movement was out of the question as your limbs felt like puzzle pieces out of place. You were hardly capable of lifting your arm without inducing tremors. A broken puppet on a flimsy string.
Still out of breath and out of words, you looked up. The world was a cup of full of water and this sight was the drop to make it overflow. A body, in the middle of the street.
A body. A body. A body. Her body.
"Oh no," your eyes swelled as your eyes glanced towards the empty seat on your right. "Aria. Oh god."
Your eyes fluttered manically all over the car in search of your phone. Perhaps it was crushed under the seat or somehow fell from the vehicle. Needless to say, chances of help coming in time were slim.
You turned to open your door despite being too weak to do so. Your arms felt like measly twigs on a great oak tree. Using all the strength you had, you pushed and managed to get it open.
When you tried getting out, your legs failed you, resulting in you splattering on the concrete like paint. You let out a cry, glass stuck to you like leeches, prickling and stabbing at various points in your body. Blood piled from your gut as if your skin was a broken damn.
You couldn't walk. Your best friend laid in the middle of the street too bloody and mangled to identify and you couldn't even reach her.
"No!" you screamed, not sure who you were demanding in the dark. "Let me be with her!"
Faced down, you tried dragging your body with your arms. All sensation, all senses in your body had fizzled into the stinging knives dragging through your skin. Any chances of any bright emotion stripped away, and it all burned down to this moment.
You reached your hand out, "Aria! Can you hear me?! I forgive you, okay?! Please tell me you hear me!"
You were too far, yet each time you dragged yourself an inch you felt hopeful. Your cries mixed with agonizing screams as the harsh road cut your skin even more—but you had to get to her. You had to tell her you love her and you weren't mad. You had to save her.
"Talk to me! Say something!" you were drawing closer. You realized that if your legs were working even a bit, you could've crawled to her instead of being stuck flat on your stomach as it bled out, dragging yourself along rugged stone to reach her.
Finally, your hand met hers. Both of you were painted in maroon. Your mouth fell open at the sight of her.
Her face was beyond recognition, covered in blood, her face battered and splayed open like she had been cut open with a knife. She suffered brutally and there was no indication telling the opposite.
"Aria?" you whispered deliriously. "Aria?"
As expected, she did not respond. You kept whispering hysterically, "Hey, I'm not mad at you. So please say something. You'll be fine. Just come on, okay?"
She didn't respond. With how much was going on, you couldn't even tell how crazy you sounded.
I shouldn't have smoked.
You started crying, cupping her face, "No. No. No. No."
She was gone. You knew she was. As the world faded around you like a burning picture, you got onto your side. Continuing to cradle her cheek, you laid next to her, pressing your face against her distorted one and embracing her mangled corpse.
You cried quietly as you laid with her one final time. The world became cold. The light went out.
-☾-
"Eren!"
His eyes didn't gravitate towards the person that called his name. He'd forgotten everyone's name. He couldn't distinguish any other sounds unless they belonged to you.
"Eren!" the voice called again.
Who is that? Is that Connie? Or Sasha?
A brunette with her hair fastened in a ponytail came into view, "Eren?"
This must be Connie. That's a girl's name, right? This must be her.
"Eren!" the girl snapped. "You need to eat something. We don't know how long the surgery is going to take—we won't hear back for a while."
Eren shook his head and the girl groaned, "Connie, help me."
Eren's eyes narrowed as he believed this girl before him was named Connie. Perhaps the lack of sleep was making him delirious. Although, he was realizing he wasn't even tired, it wasn't as late as he thought it was at all.
I'm just going insane again.
A boy with a shaved head came with a paper cup of water, "Listen, man, I know the situation's fucked up but you should at least drink some water."
Eren looked at him and blinked before he remembered. No, this is Connie. That's Sasha.
He reached for the cup, "Okay."
"I think I'm going to call the others from the group," Sasha licked her lips. "The girls need to know. Armin. Oh, god. Armin. He's going to freak out. And Jean—he was so upset about what happened a few hours ago."
She pulled her phone out and Connie said, "Maybe we shouldn't call anyone yet."
"Armin is fine," Eren sighed. "Nobody else."
"And Pieck?" Connie asked.
"I'll give her a call," Eren answered in a low voice. "I think it's better if she hears it from me."
The automatic sliding doors opened to the ER. In walked Zeke, his glasses askew and his chest heaving. Wide blue eyes swept across the room, settling on his little brother in one of the corners with his friends.
"What took you so long?" Eren eyed him.
"I had to take care of something," Zeke replied. "How's it looking?"
"Your dad's performing the operation on her right now," Connie answered.
"We should at least tell the others," Sasha said. "It's been three hours. We should call her family."
"Fuck her family," Eren growled.
"Don't say that—"
"No, I will," he stood up. "She's been begging her family to help her for years to the point where she stopped trying. They watched her suffer and chose to stay fucking quiet about it. They could burn in hell for I care."
"You're just not going to tell her parents that their daughter is in the hospital?" Connie quizzed.
"No."
"What about Theo?" Sasha added. "He'd die if you kept this from him."
"I'll arrange for him to come here, and I'll take care of the kid," Eren said sharply. "I'll keep him and Y/n with me. I'll get us a bigger apartment so he has a room to himself and I'll have him finish school here. And—and she'll stay here like she always wanted, and they'll both be safe."
"What about insurance?" Sasha questioned like she was speaking to a child. "She's under her parents' plan."
"They'll have it in the system. If not, then I'll pay for it," Eren responded, determination and anger thick in his voice. "Or I'll use my plan to cover it."
"That's not how insurance works," Sasha said. "You'd have to marry her for her to be covered."
"Then that's what I'll fucking do," Eren glared at her.
Her brown eyes widened, as did Connie's and Zeke's. They'd known this hot-headed boy for their whole lives and never once had they seen him act as irrational and delirious as this moment right here.
"That's not your call, Eren," Zeke calmly said.
Eren's eyes flickered towards his brother, "Zeke, would you ever do this to me? Would you ever beat me so badly I end up in the hospital on an operation table where I'm bleeding out?"
Zeke's brows raised. The salt of reality lingered on his tongue, "No. No, I wouldn't."
"Then why the hell did her brother do this to her?" Eren pointed towards the doors they had taken you through. "Huh? Tell me why the hell her brother didn't protect her the way brothers do? Why does she have to be scared to be around her own family?"
Zeke stayed silent, looking away as he did not have the answer his little brother was looking for.
Sasha and Connie shared a look and frowned. Sasha was tearing up once again so she chose to sit down and rub her arms, hoping that it would somehow kickstart some sort of mechanism in her body to stop the tears. Connie noticed and wrapped his arms around her, his expression blank.
"I see that fucking scumbag again and I'll beat him till he can't breath," Eren threatened. "Where is he? He's the business you were taking care of, right? Tell me where the fuck Mason is."
Before he knew it, Eren had his fists gripping onto Zeke's collar. Zeke tried to calm him down, "Eren, you're not in the right state of mind right now."
"My state of mind is perfectly clear right now," Eren dangerously said. "My state of mind has never been better."
Then without any other words, Eren walked towards the front doors and out towards the street. Knowing Zeke, your brother was likely in his car, passed out like the drunkard he was.
"Mason!" Eren yelled, calling out for him like he was a lost puppy. "Show your face so I can kill you myself, you piece of shit!"
The sound of a car door closing alerted Eren and he faced the sound. Your brother stood beside Zeke's car, his eyes widened when he saw Eren.
Those eyes, the same color as yours, a shade he absolutely adored. But the shape of his were slightly different than yours. Certain features of his resembled some that you had, and it was sickening Eren to his stomach. To see the features he loved more than life itself be disregarded and stamped onto some swine like your brother.
He wanted to beat the living shit out of Mason for that level of disrespect itself.
Mason's eyes narrowed, "What are you doing here? You did this! My sister is in there because of you!"
Mason charged at him. Eren's brows were furrowed as he tackled your brother to the ground, his fists connecting to the sides of Mason's face.
"How does that feel, huh?" Eren roared, throwing punch after punch. "Is this what you did to her!? Tell me how it fucking feels!"
Normally, when he was angry, he'd see flashes of red almost as if he was blacking out. But right now, his vision could not be clearer. His mind was in a state of raw rage, one that drives the possessor to be levelheaded enough to calculate each and every move.
This was not a fit of anger. This was something he needed to do.
"How does it feel, asshole!? Huh? HUH?!" he thundered. "She trusted you and you did this to her?!"
He was being pulled off your sibling, looking up to see that it was his own doing so. He writhed in his hold, "Get off me, Zeke! I'm not done!"
"You want me to sit back and get my nails done too?" Zeke quizzed angrily. "Cut that shit out right now, Eren. You think she wants this? For you to beat her brother to a bloody pulp?"
"You don't know what she wants! Don't act like you do!" Eren yelled, still squirming to get out of his brother's reach.
"Do you?" Zeke interrogated.
Eren felt tears of frustration stinging his skin, "She wanted to be happy. She wanted to feel safe. I left her sad and alone."
Zeke froze, releasing Eren from his grasp. Zeke realized . . . Eren felt at fault. Eren understood you and did more for you than anyone else ever could.
Expecting him to lunge at your brother again, Zeke was no less than startled when Eren was calm, his back faced to him.
"Zeke," he dangerously spoke over his shoulder. "Get rid of this pile of shit. I don't want to see him here or near her ever again."
With that, Eren walked back in the direction of the emergency room. He hoped his brother could come through for him. For your sake.
Sasha was leaning on Connie, their hands interlaced. Eren frowned, seeing his friends in pain was just as horrible. This whole thing was beginning to feel like a nightmare and Satan the puppeteer.
"I'm here! I came as soon as I heard!" Armin frantically ran in. He was out of breath, pale yet also red in the cheeks.
"Armin," Sasha cried, throwing her arms around him.
"How is she?" Armin looked at Eren while holding Sasha.
"We haven't heard yet," Eren responded, a little relieved after seeing his best friend.
He hadn't even thought of how hard Armin would take it. Armin was the first friend you made here. You both hung out all the time, having lived in the same building, you, him, and Connie were always together. And of course, Sasha was the girl in the group your bond had been strongest with. Mikasa and you were so protective over each other. Other than Sasha, you were the only girl Eren had seen Mikasa love so much.
"Are you here for a Y/n?" a nurse approached them.
Eren turned around, feeling his blood rush to his head rather quickly, "Yes—yes. Is she okay?"
"Unfortunately, this is not an update about her," the woman replied. "The police will arrive sometime in the next few hours for questioning."
"Police?" Sasha squeaked.
"Yes, I'm afraid this was a clear attack and we had to call them. It's protocol," the nurse said.
"Okay," Eren nodded frantically. "But what about her—is she out of surgery yet? I have to see her."
"I don't have any information on her status right now," she replied flatly. "I'm afraid you wouldn't be able to see the patient unless you are intermediate family. Friends aren't permitted to visit unless her medical team clears it. I would have to call her parents or siblings if she has any."
Eren scowled, thinking of any possible rule that would let him have priority. "I'm her fiancé," he finally blurted. "There's no rule against me seeing her. By law, I'm allowed to."
According to Paradis law, Eren was correct. Fiancés had just as much of a right as intermediate family when it came to emergencies. He knew that the next step he would have to take is to change him to your primary emergency contact so in any case of shit getting fucked in the future, he'd have the right to intervene and be notified straight away. Not your family. He'd be your family now.
The nurse looked him up and down, "I will let you know right away once we receive any news."
Eren nodded but then the doors burst open and Grisha stood there, eyes wide.
"Dad," Eren breathed, alarmed by the look on his father's face.
"Come with me," he said.
Eren's eyes widened as he followed his father through the doors. Armin, Connie and Sasha shared a look before watching their friend walk off.
"Dad, you're scaring me," Eren said, following his father into an elevator and watching the doors shut. "Is she okay?"
Grisha looked at his son, "Hannes is going to come later, you should feel lucky that he's the detective that's coming in for questioning."
"What do you mean?" Eren quizzed. "You—you think I did this?"
"Eren, you brought me a half dead girl in the middle of the night," the doctor snapped. "Who do you think the police will believe?"
"She's not in a state to tell," Eren frowned. "Is she?"
Grisha sighed stepping out of the elevator. He led Eren towards a room in the recovery wing. There you laid in a bed, white hospital gown on you speckled with little leaves. You weren't awake and you didn't look at peace even in your sleep.
"We have to call her family immediately," Grisha said. "Mason is in Trost I heard. I'll give him a call."
"No," Eren quickly grasped his father's arm pleadingly. "Her parents are fine and her little brother. But not him. Please not him."
"But Eren—"
"He's the one that did this to her, okay?" Eren cried. "I didn't want to say it, but I have to. He's not allowed near her ever! If anyone tries to let him in, I'll—"
"Alright," Grisha nodded. "I'll alert security downstairs that he isn't permitted on the premises."
Eren looked down, a strange sensation in his stomach not to be confused with relief. "Is she asleep or . . ."
"The operation was successful. She hasn't woken yet, there's no telling when she will. What caused her to be put at risk was the wound dehiscence from her previous surgery following the accident. Usually, if it occurs it's within the first month or two of the initial operation," Grisha explained. "But with how badly she was injured, it seemed like the trauma caused her skin to rupture. She lost a lot of blood. The rest of her body was put under just as much. This attack was one meant to kill."
Eren covered his mouth, eyes glued to the ground. He couldn't even fathom how a family member could do this to another. Especially a brother to his younger sibling. He wished so badly that it was easier to become estranged from your family. But it wasn't.
Mason wasn't an abusive ex-boyfriend you could break up with and have no connection with. He was your family. Someone you would be bound to for life. Someone that shared your name, your blood, your parents, your home, your younger brother. Everything.
"You can sit with her while I call her mother and father," Grisha patted his son. "Is there anybody else that should be alerted?"
"Her roommate," Eren answered. "But I'll call her."
Grisha nodded, leaving the room.
Eren sat down next to you, reaching for your hand, cold to the touch. You were hooked up to an IV like an electrical appliance. You didn't look at peace at all. You looked like you were being tormented even when you were away from the world.
Eren couldn't help himself at how you looked. He held your hand against his lips and cried, pausing to kiss the back of it every so often, his tears staining your skin.
-☾-
"Y/n!" a little girl called out.
You looked back, grinning as you were beating your best friend in the race you were having.
You were about to turn seven soon and your mother had made it your duty to keep your three-year-old brother entertained as he "raced" with you on his Fisher Price tricycle, too young to say anything other than your name.
"Y/n!" Theo called from the distance.
Laughing, you raced towards the meadow you guys always played in. The sun was setting, casting an orangey glow onto the earth. As a child, the world was always seen through this saturated lens.
Maybe . . . the reason I was born . . . was so that the three of us could run this race, on this day.
You could hear the sound of Aria running and Theo ringing his bike bell. The ring letting you know they weren't that far behind. You reached an oak tree, jumping up and down in victory.
"Not fair!" Aria said. "You left me when I was helping Theo put his helmet on!"
Not caring, you laughed as Theo caught up, ringing the bike bell. You fell onto your back at the foot of the tree, closing your eyes and refusing to wake up from this dream.
-☾-
"Oh Y/n," Pieck gasped when she rushed in.
Sasha, Armin, and Connie sat by the window, watching in silence. It had been about two hours since Eren's father had let them up to see you.
Eren had not left your side for even a second. He hadn't said a word either. So far, the only ones that knew about what happened were sitting in this room with you. All except Zeke who was off taking care of your brother somewhere remote. Your other friends were still in the dark and Eren wanted more than anything to call Mikasa and Jean right away.
"I'll stay with her. You guys can head home," Pieck said after listening to the story from Connie. Eren had tuned their voices out up until this point.
"I'm not going anywhere," Eren darkly said. "Armin, Sasha, Con, you guys head home and get some rest. Pieck and I will stay."
Armin, Sasha and Connie pursed their lips, getting up. Eren watched as Sasha tucked your hair to show your face, she bent down, pressing a kiss to your forehead and murmuring, "I love you. Please come back to me soon."
Connie noticed her tearing up as she backed away and covered her mouth. He bent down, doing the same and kissing your forehead, "I need you, okay? I need you to come back to life and make fun of me and hold onto my arm while I rant to you. Please?"
Eren watched as Connie pressed another kiss to your temple and backed away slower than Sasha had. His eyes on you as he stepped backwards towards the door that Sasha had already rushed out of in result of not being able to see you in this state.
Then Armin came to you. He let his hand rest atop yours. He wore a defeated look, his eyes were half lidded and he stared at you. He didn't kiss you on the forehead or murmur a tearful goodbye, but he stood there the longest. He hoped he could feel your warmth a little while longer, maybe it would make him feel a little less useless before he left.
Pieck came to your side, cupping your cheeks, "I'm such a moron. I thought he was coming to visit her—I didn't know he'd do this. I would never have let him up to our apartment." She was trying not to cry, "I'm sorry. What the hell kind of a friend am I?"
Eren let out a sharp breath, causing Pieck to look at him when he said, "Friend?"
Pieck stared in shocked silence. Was he going to yell at her for allowing you to get to this point? She felt like she was deserving of it. I deserve a punishment much worse.
"She thinks of you as her sister," Eren looked at your face. "You, Hitch, Mikasa, and Sasha. She's talked about giving her life for you guys."
Pieck's breath faltered, "She . . . has?"
Eren's eyes floated back to her, "Yeah. So don't beat yourself up over what happened. She'd never get mad at you."
Pieck, to her own surprise, started to cry. Eren's eyes widened—he'd known her a long time and had never seen her so much as get upset. Yet here she was crying while sitting by your side.
"You know . . . in the beginning, I thought that she hated me—or thought I was weird," Pieck admitted. "I never really had any girl friends because everyone always thought I was strange. She was the first to accept me. I really thought she wouldn't trust me because she's from the upper class of Paradis and I'm, well, I'm from Marley."
Eren frowned, "She's not one to think so stupidly."
"I know that now," Pieck wiped her eyes with a soft smile. "She was friends with Historia and all her other little friends. They always thought I was weird. Ever since middle school. Opposing schools or whatever."
She looked back down at you, holding your hand, "I need to tell her how much I love her when she wakes up."
"You and me both," Eren turned to look at you as well. For a while, they stayed that way, quiet as they gazed at you before Eren spoke. "Hey, it's sort of a weird time at night, if you want me to go down and grab a coffee for you, I can."
Pieck stood up, "No, no. I'll go get some for us both. You stay here with your girl." She cracked a teasing smile at him. "Oh and here, you asked me to grab this, right?"
She pulled out your Bluetooth headphones that Eren had gifted you. Eren reached for them, "Thanks."
Pieck bowed her head and walked out. Eren pulled his phone out, connecting the headphones to it. He scrolled through his messages, seeing an old one from Theo the day you went to Stohess.
Theo
*sent attachment*
Y/n after crying to love story
by taylor swift while she's
having cramps
In the picture, you were asleep on Theo's shoulder while he took silly photos. Eren smiled at how blissful of a slumber you seemed to be in. He scrolled through his music app, through the section of songs that you had added to his phone before he selected one that he figured you would like to hear in your dreams.
[play "mirrorball" by taylor swift. PLAY IT OR ELSE 🔫]
The edge of Eren's phone case slid off and he cocked a brow at the sight of a paper in it. He pulled it out, seeing your handwriting on it. It then hit him, you gave it to him and told him not to read it unless you weren't around. His eyes fell onto your words.
My heart is a trinket, I give it to you so you could place it on a shelf with books, so I'll feel at home. Or on the mantle above your fireplace, beside all your family heirlooms and under your family portrait. Or if you wish, you could break it. But please, do not ever give it back to me. It'll never feel like mine again.
He stared at that piece of paper, feeling his heart fall from his chest and straight into the palm of your hand.
-☾-
"Open your eyes, Y/n," Aria giggled.
"No!" you laughed, shaking your head.
"Please! For me! You'll end up losing the game then!" you could hear the laughter of your best friend. The voice of a seven-year-old somehow seeming convincing enough to have you do its bidding.
"I found you!" she insisted. "Now it's your turn to come find me!"
"Okay! Okay!" you giggled, hearing her high-pitched childlike laugh join yours as you began opening your eyes, the light of a thousand suns pouring into your vision.
-☾-
You stirred awake, the side of your body aching an awful amount. Ugly fluorescent lights stung your pupils as they dilated due to the sensitivity.
You looked around, hoping to adjust to the lighting and see just where the hell you were. The hospital . . . why am I here?
You moved ever so slowly, craning your neck to the side although it was sore as fuck. A boy, asleep in a chair just two feet from you. You tilted your head as you examined him.
He's beautiful. He's maddeningly beautiful.
He had smooth, iridescent skin, not a blemish in sight. Disheveled hair tied back. His hands were battered, his knuckles looked like they had been busted open. His closed eyes were lined with the fullest and most beautiful lashes, like black-winged butterflies. More than anything, you wanted to see those eyes open.
I wonder what color his eyes are. Whatever color they are, I'm sure they're pretty.
You noticed a headset dangling around your neck. Carefully, you removed it and set it on the bedside table, still trying to remember what led to you to get to this point. You stared at the pretty boy, trying to figure out who he was and why he was visiting you.
Slowly as to not wake him, you unhooked your IV from your hand and got off the bed. Still, he was asleep thanks to how little noise you made. Your sock covered feet met the floor and you suddenly remembered everything.
With wide eyes, you looked at the sleeping boy. Then at the door. Letting out a gasp, you rushed to the door, not even realizing that the boy had stirred awake.
"Y/n!" the kid called, but you were through the door already.
"Aria," you muttered when you got into the hall. You frantically looked around, "Aria."
You walked straight ahead in the direction of the nurses station but a beautiful dark haired girl with dark eyes that you didn't recognize saw you, "You're awake!"
"Do you know where my friend Aria is?" you desperately asked the stranger. "We—we were in an accident together. That's why I'm here! She's in one of these rooms. Will you help me find her? I—I need to make sure she's okay!"
"Y/n, you need to get back in bed," the girl looked worried.
How does she know my name?
"Aria!" you looked around, noticing nurses rushing towards you.
A nurse grabbed you gently, instructing the other, "She's in shock. Where's her fiancé? Mr. Jaeger?"
Fiancé? What the hell is she saying? I'm a highschool student. I'm supposed to be graduating next Tuesday. I'm not engaged. Not to Zeke of all people.
You looked over your shoulder and noticed the boy from your bedside standing in the doorway of your room. His brows were furrowed and his eyes wide. His beautiful beautiful eyes.
Why is he looking at me like that? Why is he looking at me like he's known me my entire life?
"Y/n, you need to rest! You can't be walking around! You might rip your stitches," the dark-haired girl said.
"She's dead, isn't she?" you sobbed. You were hyperventilating, walking past her to get to another room, "I need to find her! Let me die with her."
You fell to your knees, crying into the palms of your hands when suddenly someone picked you up. You kept your eyes shut, listening to the soothing voice of a boy.
"I got you," he whispered. "Please don't cry. I'm never going to let anyone hurt you ever again."
The tears were draining your stamina, plucking each piece of consciousness from your body. You wanted to believe him, and for some reason you did. You didn't want to open your eyes again. . . so you never did.
Another hour had gone by.
Eren was adjusting your blanket for what Pieck believed was the thousandth time. He hadn't slept all night. The few minutes he had, you had woken up so he decided not to let his eyes leave you for even a second.
He looked over your features. Fragile and beautiful. My trinket. My moon.
He picked the book that he was reading to you back up, and he read to you quietly. "'For someone who loved words as much as I did, it was amazing how often they failed me.'"
"You should sleep," Pieck whispered. "Just got off the phone with Theo. Her family is on the way, should be about two hours."
"Why are you crying?" Eren didn't even look at her.
"Why were you?" she countered, sniffling.
"I couldn't protect her. I did nothing when she needed me," he mumbled under his breath.
Pieck stayed silent.
"I want to take her far away with me," Eren gazed at you as you slept. "I want her to be free."
Pieck smiled, "Every time things got hard with Porco, Y/n would step in and help fix things. I don't know why she does that with everything. She sees someone in trouble and she rushes to fix it even if it makes things harder for herself. So the least I could do for her is tell you this. You want to take her away if you think that makes her happy, then you do that. If you are sure you want her for the rest of forever then you keep her. I mean, you and I would have to share cuz she's sort of my best friend."
Eren chuckled, "You're alright, Pieck."
"Eh, you're not so bad." She wore a soft smile, "You must really like her."
"A few months back, not that long after we met," Eren began, "we were at Garrison Park. I was just starting to get to know her, and she told me about Aria and Mason for the first time. I told her a bunch of shit too and even though it was a bit depressing, we actually had fun that night. Just to tease her, I told her to guess my favorite color."
Pieck stared at him, keeping along with the story.
"I didn't know I had a favorite color until she said red," he smiled ever so gently.
Pieck stared at him, some strange twist of awe on her features, "You love her?"
"More than anyone else," he answered, looking at you, his voice so quiet Pieck could hardly hear. "If I were to lose her, then I'd welcome death with open arms, and let the earth swallow me whole."
Pieck stared, eyes watering while she watched him touch your cheek the way a lover does. All your books, all your hopes and dreams, they were all coming true and you weren't even here to see it.
Pieck had an exam, so eventually she had to leave. She promised she'd return with food for her and Eren once she was back. He couldn't help but feel bad considering she sat there all night by your side flipping through notes and keeping an eye on you.
They agreed to not tell the others yet, it would cause more stress on Pieck and Eren. Besides, Eren wanted to be the first person you saw when you woke up.
There was a knock on the door, causing Eren to straighten up a bit. He looked back, seeing the last person he was expecting to be there.
She walked in, a worried look on her face as she looked at you on the bed. Then her eyes fell on Eren, a mix of shock and something he couldn't quite decipher.
"Your father told me what happened. I came right when I spoke to him," she said.
"Dina," Eren blinked with surprise. "What're . . . you . . ."
She moved her blonde hair out of her blue eyes. Eyes that looked just like Zeke's. She stared at you, "She's gorgeous. Absolutely beautiful. I was very sorry to hear about this. How are you doing now, Eren?"
"Um," Eren shook his head, unsure on how the fuck to answer that question. "I don't know."
He watched her circle towards your other side, fluffing the pillow that was practically slipping from under your head. Perplexed by the fact this was her first time seeing you and she was already taking up the role of your boyfriend's mother, Eren frowned.
He wasn't sure why she always tried so hard to usurp that role, but he thought it wasn't so bad of a gesture. If his mother were here, she'd rush in with all the essentials along with a basket of muffins or something corny that mothers always have. Eren wouldn't really know, most his life, his mother was too sick to do all that shit. But she always tried.
"Your mother would find her pretty too," Dina gazed. "Zeke always mentioned Mason's little sister, but this is my first time seeing her."
"Yeah," Eren nodded, eyes on your closed ones. "Too pretty."
Dina paused, looking at him before softly smiling and setting her bag down, "You know, there was a time you were this tiny little thing and you thought girls had cooties."
Eren looked at her, the ghost of a smirk flashing across his face, "Cooties?"
"Oh, yeah," Dina nodded knowingly. "You used to say that you'd never fall in love because only idiots did that."
Eren closed his eyes, "Then that means I'm the biggest idiot to ever exist."
His stepmother beamed at him and pulled out a Tupperware container, handing it to Eren. It was the lasagna he skipped out on last night. Eren frowned, "I appreciate you coming down and all but you really don't have to do any of this."
"I want to," Dina insisted.
"But I don't want you to," Eren shoved the box back to her.
"That's fine. But that's not entirely your own choice," she replied.
"You're not my mother. Stop pretending like you are," Eren glared.
Dina froze, eyes widened as she stared at him in astonishment. She nodded, "Alright."
She stood up and Eren dropped his gaze. This woman knew his mother was dying and chose to see her husband while she rotted away at the hospital. Unforgiveable. No, no amount of her remorse could make him forgive them.
Eren redirected his eyes towards you, not noticing Dina leave the container on the little counter by the door.
After a few minutes, there was another knock on the door, "Eren?"
Eren turned, making direct eye contact with your little brother standing behind your parents.
-☾-
The sound of leaves rustling in the wind were the first thing you heard. The sun was beating down on you, causing the innards of your eyelids to see red. You slowly opened your eyes, tears piled in the corners.
A shadow loomed over you, light brown hair glinting in the light, "About time."
"Huh?" you sat up. "Eren?"
"Try again," it was a girl.
"Aria," you breathed.
"Y/n, why are you crying?" Aria tilted her head.
You wiped your tears realizing you called Aria by the wrong name, "Sorry, I feel like I just had the longest dream of my life."
"Dream, huh?" she smiled. "Life really felt that way, didn't it?"
"What do you mean?" you stood up, looking down and seeing yourself dressed in white, a long lacy gown that was doing quite a lot for your figure. "And why am I dressed like Christine Daae from Phantom of the Opera?"
Aria laughed, "I missed you."
"Why are you talking like that?" you squinted at her. "Which one of us is getting married?"
"No one," Aria frowned.
You furrowed your brows, not understanding what was happening. You looked around, feeling yourself smile when you noticed yourself in a meadow of endless yellow flowers. A cloud of gold.
You picked your dress up so you could run, a grin on your face as you did. Not a single person or thing in sight. No grown up to tell you what to do and no other human to tell you to grow up.
You kept running through the field until you saw someone sitting in the middle. You slowed down, walking towards him. He was sitting on the ground with a desolate stare on his face, his face drenched in tears. His eyes, nose and ears pinched pink.
The smile that was on your face had been torn away. All you could do was stare at the beautiful dark-haired boy. His blue-green eyes a color you couldn't assign one individual color to. Perhaps the shade of the world, earth, the universe. Oceans and land conjoined through misty clouds to create a shade that was his eyes.
Aria stopped at your side and you stared at the teal-eyed stranger, "That's the boy from the hospital. Why is he crying?"
"He always does that."
"Why?" you asked.
"Look where he's looking."
You looked to see a tombstone, reading the epitaph. Your eyes widened.
[play "somewhere only we know" by keane]
"He's here to see me? What am I to him?" you gasped.
"You have to ask him that," she bent down, staring at him. "He's been dying to ask you too."
"He's crying for me?" you asked, voice trembling as you sat on your knees right beside him, it was like he couldn't see either of you. Like the two of you were ghosts.
"Yes," she nodded. "He never leaves this spot. He always sits here, staring and crying."
"Eren," you whisper, reaching your hand out to touch him. He didn't react to your touch, in fact his eyes closed as if he sensed a comforting presence.
"His name's pretty," Aria smiled. "That's the name you said when you woke up. It has a beautiful meaning too. You know that, right? It means holy." She paused, beaming at him, "You finally love someone."
"Yeah," you had tears in your eyes, not even looking at her. "Are you mad at me?"
"No," she softly responded. "Never."
You faced her brokenly, "Did I love you enough?"
She smiled a painful smile, "Yes. God yes."
"Then why do I feel like I had way more to give?" you frowned.
"Because I know you're overflowing with it. I feel it," she told you. "I'm just not with you to let you know I do."
"It's not fair!" you cried. "All my love for you, I don't know where to put it. I wanted to be selfish with you—keep you forever. But I want to be selfless with my grief and cast it all aside for someone else to take."
"Leave your grief here with me," she said quietly. "Give your love to someone else. Someone that would cry for you."
Her eyes fell on Eren and yours did too.
"Do I love him enough?" you asked.
"Looks like you're still an idiot," she murmured.
"If I sit with him, will I be able to be with him forever?" you tilted your head, staring at Eren.
"No," she answered, making you look at her. "You have to do something else."
"Something . . . else?" your brows pinched. She nodded and you questioned, "What do I have to do?"
"Whatever it takes to find the sea," she said knowingly, standing up and running.
"The sea?" you quizzed. Find the sea?
With a hesitant look back at Eren staring at the headstone, you followed her towards the sound of a steam engine. You climbed a hill, getting startled when you saw her getting into the boxcar of a train.
"Wait!" you yelled. "Don't leave me behind!"
You picked up your pace and tried to catch up to her. You struggled to get on and once you did, you wobbled to your feet. You looked at your best friend and she grabbed you, pulling you in.
"I promise I wanted to stay with you. I wanted to love you more," she sounded like she was trying not to cry. "I wanted to keep talking to the stars with you forever."
Now she was crying. And you just stood there, eyes widened in agony.
"I want you to live a long life, with laughter and tears and everything in between," she tried laughing through her tears. "Talk to the stars, and I'll listen. Grow old surrounded by love. That's all I want for you."
She stepped back to see your face, "I'll love you forever and always. In life and in death."
She leaned forward letting her forehead rest against yours as she smiled. Your wide eyes didn't change to a look of fleeting happiness like hers. You let out a gasp when you fell backwards, off the train.
You screamed for her, reaching your arm out, "Don't leave me! I can't be alone again!"
She watched you fall until you felt your back hit the ground. You let out a grunt when you made contact with concrete. That felt . . . familiar.
You looked around, seeing that you had returned to Eden Lane. With panicked movements, your eyes swept the area. The front of the car in flames, glass shattered all over the street, blood everywhere. Then Aria's body and yours as well.
It felt like you were experiencing the accident from a third point of view. You rushed towards your body on the ground, seeing that you were unconscious. You were watching yourself die.
"No!" you screamed, running to your body.
You rolled yourself over, gripping the shoulders of this past version of you, "Wake up! You have to get up! They need you!"
You started crying, shaking the body bordering death. "Theo! Pieck! Sasha! Eren! So fucking wake up, okay!"
You watched yourself lie there. Motionless.
"Don't you get it! They need me!" You screamed. "Get up you piece of shit! Get up!" You were sobbing with anger, "This could be the end of everything! So move! Don't betray me! That's all you've ever done! Letting me and everyone else down!"
"I HATE YOU!" you bawled. "I ALWAYS HAVE!"
"I need to get back to them! How dare you die like this!? You coward!"
You bowed your head, your fists hitting the ground as you sobbed, eyes closing, "I need to get back to him. I need to wipe his tears. . . He . . . he needs me."
The earth slipped from under your feet.
-☾-
You woke with a gasping breath, almost sick of opening your eyes. It felt as if you had passed through multiple lifetimes in the span of seconds.
"Y/n."
Your eyes shot to the voice on your left. The first thing you saw from when you opened your eyes was a boy. Handsome and pretty all at once. Eyes an electrifying color. Eyes that looked like . . .
The sea.
-☾-