CINDY
Dad's been texting all week, asking about when he can come over to paint my baby's name in his room. After I told him and Mom I found the name, they just want to help me wrap everything up.
Baby's going to be here so soon and there are so many tiny details, but now that I have the big stuff figured out, I feel like I can rest. I'm not too worried about putting the very last finishing touches on everything. Like a hospital bag.
"You don't even have any bags." Levin comments as I go to feed him a bite of my sandwich.
I shrug. "I have my purses."
"Yeah, but you'll need more space, baby." He pauses to chew. "I can buy you one."
That's an instant no from me. I start shaking my head like a maniac. He only ever has permission to buy me food. I hate when he spends on me.
"I'll go get one eventually. Just not right now. I've been stressing about the baby's room for what feels like forever, but now that that's done..." I trail off, stepping toward him and wrapping my arms around his shoulder. Levin grins, putting his hands on my hips. "I get to enjoy my boyfriend." I finish.
He juts out his bottom lip like I've said the sweetest thing and then kisses me once. His arms snake around my waist and he holds me as close as he can.
"You smell so good," I tell him, burying my nose in his shirt. "Are you using something new?"
"Yeah, do you like it?"
"I wanna bathe in it." I mumble.
He squeezes me tight, rocking us from side-to-side until I have to stop him because this tiny human in my belly makes everything about five times harder.
We stay hugging each other for a few moments. Him rubbing my back and me rubbing his. I pull away first just to look at him when he speaks up.
"Do you want to go somewhere with me?" He asks.
And, duh, I'm instantly beaming. I nod excitedly, asking for more details just with my eyes.
"So, it's Chris's birthday this weekend, and he's having a little get together. I don't know how you'd feel about it seeing as you want to rest and everything, though, so..."
That last sentence comes out teasingly. I roll my eyes at him. Is he joking? I want to be with him 24/7. I wish to literally be attached to him at all times.
I groan. "You're soooo annoying. But I like you enough to let it pass, I guess."
"You love me, you mean."
I'm not saying it again until he says it, so I lift my chin defiantly like I'm a child. And he laughs at me, kissing my cheek because he knows I'm not gonna say it.
"So? Does that sound good?" He questions, searching my eyes with his own sparkly ones. And my face. And my body... Why is he looking at me like that? "It's not a huge thing, just close friends and drinks at his place. So, if you need to rest, you're good. Or we can leave whenever. My place isn't too far from there."
I tilt my head up, silently asking for him to kiss me. He does. Just a little one.
"That sounds amazing."
And then, because I can't take it anymore, I cover his eyes with the palm of my hand.
"What the hell are you doing?" He asks through that stupid giggle of his.
"You're looking a me like you want to eat me." And I don't mean that in a sexual way. In fact, I'm thinking of those cartoons where they're so hungry that they start imagining their friends as fried chicken.
But this guy is a total freak.
"Well..." He trails off, pulling my hand down and giving me the eyes again.
I gasp, smacking his chest with the back of my hand. "LEVIN!"
"What?!" He laughs. "How is it my fault you're so fucking stunning all the time?"
He has a point. I am pretty hot. Who the hell am I to argue when he's only stating facts?
I grin all big at him. "Fair enough."
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Levin and I are out shopping for a little something for Christopher's birthday. His party is later tonight, so it's a little last minute, but whatever.
We've been walking around this little antique shop for the past twenty minutes trying to find something. Levin wants to get his friend something funny and I... Well, I've noticed that he wears a lot of rings, so I'm looking for a nice one in the back.
Right now, I'm between two. A thick, silver ring with this cool design or a thinner one that looks older.
I'm about to turn around to get Levin's opinion, but one of the rings catch my eyes. The band is thin and gold, the center stone is tiny, but shiny and beautiful. I'm completely in love with it.
I grab it from the holder and slip it onto my ring finger. It fits me like it was made for me. Dear fucking God, it's gorgeous.
When I take off the ring, Levin magically appears behind me, holding two... cookie jars?
"What's that?" He asks, eyeing the ring as I slip it back onto the foam hand.
"I was just looking at the rings." I pucker my lips, silently asking for a kiss. He presses his lips to mine with a smile. "I need your opinion on which one to get Christopher, actually."
"Oh, ok. I need your opinion too. What do we think?"
He's holding both jars up a little higher. Both have... animals on them? One looks like fucking Angelina Ballerina on crack, and then other... Jesus Christ.
I poke the uglier one's nose, making a face at Levin. "What the hell is this thing?"
He grins. "Inside joke. Pick one."
Uh... They're both God awful. But why do I kind of want the one with the rat in a tutu.
I point to the one that makes me want to wash my eyes out with bleach, and take the one I want in my arms, giving Levin the rings I chose.
He puts back the thin ring, takes back the cookie jar in my arms, and we go to pay. Well, he pays. He grabs my card and tucks it in his front pocket. And that's enough to keep me away. I will actually pass away in this store if I accidentally touch his dick.
I grab one of the jars and the little baggy with the ring, waiting for Levin to follow behind me, but he doesn't. He hands me his keys, kisses my hair, and tells me he thinks he wants to look at one last thing.
On the way to the car, I spot this little ice scream place. So, I take everything to the car and then head back to get ice cream for me and Levin.
But just as I'm about to open the door, I notice the birthday boy inside.
I've only met Christopher about two times, but I know his face. I know it so well because off all the pictures Alexa proudly showed off to me.
The thing that makes me stop, the thing that makes me turn my back and head back to the car is the girl on his arm. The tall, thin redhead I've never seen before that's squeezed his ass and kissed him.
Oh, my God. OH, MY GOD. What the fuck... WHAT THE FUCK?!?!?! What did I just see? Why did I see it? Out of everyone in the whole world, why me?
I... I have to have just imagined that. PLEASE TELL ME—
The driver's side door opens, my boyfriend looking at me all weird. Rightfully so. I just know I look like I'm on the verge off pulling every hair out of my head. BECAUSE I AM, BY THE WAY!!!!
Levin gets in, moving hair out of my face. "Are you okay?"
It takes me a moment to fully process his words, and even longer to look up at him. Levin doesn't seem like the kind of person to surround himself with people like that... with cheaters, I mean. But he knows Chris because of his job, so maybe the friendship doesn't go that—
Okay. I need to stop. The thoughts are spinning and tangling, and I know where my head is going. Levin isn't a cheater. His friend is just a major prick.
"Alexa and him are still together, right?" I mumble the question. It takes him a few beats, but he answers once he gets who I'm talking about.
"Chris? Yeah, they're still together. Why do you ask?"
I blink at Levin a few times, him staring back while he waits for me to continue. What am I supposed to say, though? That's his friend, his teammate. That's Lex's boyfriend. And I was the only one who saw, so... isn't it kind of on me to tell Alexa? Or share this with my boyfriend?
Hiding things from my significant other hasn't really worked well for me in the past, and this is Levin. I trust him and I love him, and he did just ask.
Why does this feel like the wrong thing to do, though? It would be stupid to keep it to myself, so why is my stomach in knots?
"I went into the ice cream place—or I was about to, but he was in there." I inform him. He nods slowly, waiting for me to continue. "And he kissed some random girl. She was touching all up on his butt, too."
His brows furrow, something flashing in his eyes. It looks like disappointment or disbelief, but not aimed at his friend. At me. Does he think I'm making this up?
Just as quickly as the look appeared, it's gone. He shakes his head like he's just had a bad thought, reaching for my hand.
"What was that?" I frown, pulling my hand away and tucking it under my thigh. "Why did you just look at me like that? I don't... Go look, Levin. He's probably still in there."
"It isn't that. It's that it doesn't sound like him," he assures me.
I look at him, trying to decide what to say next. But I don't get to say anything because he gets down from the car. Maybe I shouldn't follow him, but I want to know if I really saw what I saw.
And I did.
He's walking out with the girl, laughing with her and touching on her, and I'm fucking pissed. Not just because he's cheating, but because he's cheating on Alexa. My friend. One of the kindest, purest souls I know.
"Chris!" Levin calls, and he sounds angry.
His friends neck practically snaps to look at my boyfriend, his face instantly losing all of it's color. He drops the girl's arm, and I can't help but wonder why he's cheating on someone like Alexa. I mean, she's beautiful and kind. She's smart and always looks so happy.
Levin jogs up to Christopher. I can't hear what they're saying to each other, but they both look annoyed with each other. Well, Chris looks annoyed and Levin's doing the thing with his eyebrows. His whole face is scrunched up.
They talk back and forth until the redhead starts yelling at Levin's friend. Then, she starts yelling at my guy, and I want to go up to them. I know it wouldn't be my place, though.
My boyfriend comes back to me, jaw and fists clenched, eyes a little darker than they were ten minutes ago. And not in a good way, not in the way I like.
I've seen him happy. Eyes creasing and teeth on display. I've seen him tear up during sad movies, poor attempts at hiding his eyes and embarrassment. I've seen him get annoyed when his sister's call him to tell him relationship drama, brows drawn and eyes narrowed. But I haven't ever seen him angry. Flushed and tense all over.
He opens his door and his eyes land on me. It's when I offer him my hand that his shoulders fall and his eyes really soften. It's like all of that from before melts away.
He sighs, squeezing his eyes shut and then wrapping his fingers around mine. For a few moments, he stand there leaning against the car. Thinking, breathing, calming himself. And then when he open them again—his eyes—there's something there. Guilt?
I lean in closer. "What's wrong, baby?"
"Baby?" The corners of his mouth curl.
I don't say anything for a moment. Should I not have said that? He call me baby.
"Do you not like that?"
He grins, leaning in to kiss me. "No, baby, I love it. Say it again."
I shake my head. Maybe if he didn't bring it up I might have naturally started to use it more, but he brought it up and now my face is hot.
"What's wrong?"
He shrugs. "I need to tell Alexa, man. She's gonna be heartbroken."
That much is true. Alexa loves him. Like, she gets sparkly-eyed, dizzy-looking loves him. I feel so bad. What kind of dickhead could hurt someone like her?
"Maybe I should do it?" I suggest. "It wasn't you that saw... all of that."
God, I never want to see anyone get their ass squeezed in public. I need to wash my eyes out with bleach after that one. Or maybe grow the hell up.
His gaze drifts somewhere over my shoulder like he's thinking, and then he shakes his head.
"I'm not throwing you under the bus like that, Cindy. I've known them longer, and those are my friends. What if they just try to create more drama? They're all fucking babies."
I want to agree that it isn't my territory, but I've gotten to know Alexa a bit. We're even becoming friends, and if one of my friends caught my boyfriend cheating on me publicly, I'd want them to tell me.
"Yeah, I hear you. But if one of my friend's caught my boyfriend cheating, I'd want to hear it from whoever, like... saw." I frown, squeezing his hand once. "You've known them longer, though. You know best."
And I mean that. While I do think it should come from me, I also think it might not be my place. I've only met Christopher a few times, and Alexa not many times more. Maybe letting Levin handle it would be best?
God. I don't even know anymore.
I watch him slide in and turn on the car. We just sit there, me watching him and him watching the windshield. He looks like he's thinking still, but he's not sharing a single thought with me.
I hate feeling left out of his brain, but the last time I asked if I could crawl into his ear, he wouldn't talk to me for like fifteen minutes because he was dying of laughter. Except, it wasn't a joke, and I'm still waiting on an answer.
He finally looks at me. "If you get a moment alone with her, you tell her. If I get a moment alone with her, I'll tell her."
So... who ever gets to her first? Why does this feel so wrong?
I nod slowly.
I guess it does seem fair enough.
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AUTHOR'S NOTE
unedited
I KNOW I HAVEN'T UPDATED IN OVER A MONTH. SORRY!!!