They go back to the waterfall, and Jennie feels stupidly nostalgic about it, because it's only been a few weeks but it feels like so much happened between the first time she came here with Y/n alone and now.
Jennie lets Y/n help her on the way down this time, lets the older take her hand and worry about her falling, smiling softly at the worried looks Y/n keeps shooting her whenever Jennie trips or threatens to fall down the steep hill leading to the waterfall.
"The village seems kind of empty today," Jennie comments once they're down, hopping over the smaller rocks so they can go and sit down on the large, flat one in the middle. "Where is everyone?"
Y/n climbs on the rock first and turns around to help Jennie over as well, gripping her hands tightly and not letting go until Jennie is standing next to her safely. "There's another market in a town nearby. Well, it's not that near, actually. It's like a two hour's drive. It's once a month, so a lot of people go there to spend the day there and do some shopping."
"I see." Jennie sits down next to her, the stone feeling warm underneath her hands. "You didn't want to go?"
Y/n hesitates before shaking her head. "It's not like I'd buy anything anyway. My mom and Taehyung went, though."
Jennie purses her lips and watches the water rippling at the surface where the waterfall meets the small pool of water. They sit in silence for a while, Y/n tilting her head back and closing her eyes and Jennie watching her like she's a piece of art.
She looks like it, though. With the branches and leaves of the trees casting shadows on her skin, the sun painting the rest of it golden, her lips red and kissable.
Y/n blinks her eyes open as if she can feel Jennie's stare, and a smirk tugs on her lips. "What?"
Jennie shrugs. "Nothing."
"Why are you staring at me?"
"Cause you're beautiful," Jennie says, and her heart flutters when Y/n ducks her head to hide her embarrassed smile.
How cute can a person be?
Y/n gnaws on her lower lip for a moment before she reaches into her pocket and pulls out a cigarette, making Jennie's face fall.
"What are you doing?" She asks, sounding upset and disappointed.
Y/n looks up at her and sighs. "I haven't had one in almost a week."
"So why start now?"
"I need it," Y/n says. "I've been on edge all day."
"Why?"
"I don't know." Y/n sighs and shrugs her shoulders. "It's just one, Jennie."
But Jennie shakes her head and plucks the ugly thing from Y/n's fingers, placing it on the rock next to her before swinging her leg over Y/n's thighs to sit down on her lap.
Y/n's eyes widen and she looks anxious for a moment. "Jennie. Someone could see."
"No one will," Jennie says. "Most of them are gone, anyway, and we'll hear them if anyone should come."
Y/n gulps, still looking panicked, and Jennie leans in to peck her lips. It makes Y/n falter, her eyes growing hazy for a moment. Jennie smiles at the effect she has on her. "Jen..."
"Y/n/n, relax," Jennie whispers against her lips, tangling her fingers into the back of Y/n's hair to tilt her head back and kiss her better when she slots their lips together again. "Why would you smoke when I'm still around?"
Y/n is still stiff underneath her, but the more Jennie kisses her, the more she relaxes, and soon enough her hands are on Jennie's hips, pulling her closer as she kisses her back, slow and savouring.
"Don't I taste better than those nasty things?" Jennie asks after pulling back, lips brushing against Y/n's jaw as she speaks, and she presses a few kisses against the older's neck, smiling softly when she feels her hands tighten on Jennie's hips in response.
"You taste better than anything I've ever had," Y/n mumbles, one of her palms moving to the small of Jennie's back, pulling her even closer until their chests are almost pressed together. "You've got the sweetest mouth, Jen. Nothing could ever compare-"
Jennie groans and hides her face in Y/n's neck, pinching her side to get her to stop. Y/n just laughs and wraps her arms around her, pulling her into a hug. She runs her nose along Jennie's neck, breathing deeply, and drops a kiss on her collarbone.
"So... are you going back to college next semester?" Y/n asks and Jennie is surprised about the sudden question. She didn't think Y/n was that interested in her life outside of here.
"Yeah, I have to."
"Have to? Why?"
Jennie shrugs. "What do you mean, why? Everyone my age goes to college."
Y/n makes a displeased noise. "If I got higher education, I want it to be because I have a good reason for it, not just because that's what people expect of me."
Jennie pulls back to look at her. "Well... I want to get educated, though. It's not just because it's what will look good on my CV."
"Then why?"
Jennie frowns at the constant questions and Y/n smirks at her. Jennie sighs and thinks about it for a while. She's never really asked herself that question. Going to college... it was just always the next stage for her once she graduated from High School. It's like a path that was carved for her when she was born, and she's been following it ever since. There wasn't really another option for her, a plan B, if you want.
"I read a book once," Jennie slowly says, hoping that Y/n will be satisfied with her answer. "There's this quote that kind of stuck with me when I read the part. It went something like Now I understand that one of the reasons for going to college and getting an education is to learn that the things you've believed in all your life aren't true, and that nothing is what it appears to be." Y/n listens attentively and Jennie smiles because it makes her look really cute. "Like, obviously I'm not interested in every single thing I learn there. But you pick up on so much stuff when you're there, and you know, like that quote says, you open your eyes and realize a lot of stuff is actually a lot different from how you believed it to be. I'm not saying people who don't go to college can't do the same... but I think you're missing out on a lot of things in the world if you're not willing to learn." She gives Y/n a pointed look, trying and hoping that maybe, somewhere inside her cute brain, a part of the older will consider the idea of getting higher education. Of leaving this hellhole and pursue her dreams.
But Y/n just gives her a tight-lipped smile. "Well, that's not the answer I expected. But I'll take it."
Nothing.
Y/n doesn't say anything else, but Jennie can see that she's thinking hard, can see the dull look in her eyes, that Jennie's words somehow got to her, and wishes she could help, wishes Y/n would let her help.
"You don't want to?"
"Want to what?"
"Go to college."
"Why do you keep asking me the same questions, Jennie?"
"Why do you never properly answer them?"
"Because I don't have to. And I don't want to. Now stop it."
Jennie stares at her in disappointment before she sighs and begins to pull back but Y/n stops her, looking mildly panicked.
"Wait! I, uhm. I have something for you," Y/n says quietly.
Jennie tilts her head. "You do?"
Y/n averts her eyes and nods her head, pulling one of her arms back to reach into the pocket of her shorts. Jennie can't help but grin at her because she looks so shy again all of a sudden. The older pulls out a small black sachet bag that looks like it's made of velvet. The opening at the top is tied together with a red ribbon.
Y/n takes one of Jennie's hands and places the bag in it, tongue darting out to lick her lips. "It's nothing big. I just... I was at the market earlier, anyway. I had to help install some stuff there and I walked past a stand that sold all these stones and something just caught my eye. It's okay if you don't like it. I just thought... I don't know."
Jennie smiles at her, at the blush on Y/n's cheeks, and tugs on the ribbon to open the bag. She holds it upside down to get the item out, and sees something pearly fall out.
Jennie hands the bag to Y/n so she can inspect the actual present closer and she smiles even wider when she sees that it's a necklace made out of white, almost translucent stones or crystals.
Before she can even ask what it is, Y/n shifts under her, her fingers curling into Jennie's shirt.
"They're crystals. I can't remember what they're called. You can look it up online if you want." Y/n clears her throat, Jennie smiles wider at her cuteness. "I, uhm... I just thought, because you have trouble sleeping, and you're leaving soon. I won't be there to help you fall asleep. The woman who sold these told me that they help with insomnia. I mean, I don't know if I believe in that stuff, but maybe it will have some sort of placebo effect on you? You don't have to wear it. Or keep it..."
"Y/n," Jennie interrupts her rambling.
"What?"
"I love it, okay?" Jennie lets out a deep breath, her heart feeling too big in her chest, because no one has ever done something like this for her. Like... how adorable is Y/n, for even thinking of getting Jennie something like this? "Can you put it on for me?"
Y/n blinks at her for a second before nodding her head, taking the necklace and wrapping it around Jennie's neck before fiddling with the clasp on her nape for a moment. Y/n brushes her fingers over it once it's on and finally looks up to meet Jennie's eyes again.
Jennie leans in and kisses her, more sincere than the previous ones. She kisses her so deeply it has both of their hands holding the other tighter, Jennie making a weak noise and Y/n breathing shakily when their lips part long enough.
"I love it," Jennie repeats after they separate, heart thudding heavily when she feels Y/n kiss the corner of her mouth. She wants to say something else, maybe replace the last word with another one, but she can't.
"Okay," Y/n replies and brushes her hand up and down Jennie's back, calming and safe. "I'm glad."
"Thank you. You didn't have to."
"I wanted to," Y/n says. "Maybe it'll make it a little easier for me to let you go."
"How?"
"If I can make myself believe you're sleeping okay, then I won't feel as bad about you leaving."
Jennie smiles weakly, her heart clenching. "And what about me? How do I make sure you don't start smoking again when I'm gone?"
Y/n shakes her head. "You can't."
"Y/n."
"I don't want to lie to you, Jen. I will probably start again when you leave."
"But you were doing so well."
"Because you were here to distract me."
Jennie looks into her brown eyes for a moment, unable to handle all the emotions that are tugging on her heart as she stares at the older. "We can facetime," She says. "Right?"
Y/n's smile is sad. "Do you want that?"
"What? Yeah, of course I do."
"No... I mean." Y/n sighs. "Do you want to keep in touch once you leave?"
Jennie starts to frown at Y/n's tone. "You don't?"
"Isn't it just going to hurt more? I don't think I can handle seeing you or hearing your voice without being able to touch you, Jennie."
Jennie's frown softens and she moves her hand to brush Y/n's cheek with her thumb. "It's better than nothing, don't you think?"
Y/n shrugs her shoulders. "I don't know, Jennie."
Jennie gnaws on her lower lip for a few seconds, trying to decide whether she should say what she wants to say. "You could come with me."
And as expected, Y/n's gaze immediately hardens. "Jennie."
"Y/n, please, don't get angry again, just hear me out-"
"No."
"But why?"
"You know why. We talked about this. Don't... just don't."
"You're the only thing that stops us from being together, you know that, right?"
Jennie realizes that she shouldn't have said that, because the words hurt even herself, and they obviously have the same effect on Y/n, who deflates a bit and pulls away, but Jennie quickly pulls her back in and hugs her, pressing them close together.
"I'm sorry," She quietly says. "I didn't mean it like that. I'm just-fuck, , I wish you could come with me. So bad."
Y/n stays tense for another second before she melts into the embrace, hugging Jennie back tightly. "Let's just make the most of the next few days, hm?"
Jennie hates herself for getting so emotional already when she feels tears well up in her eyes.
What the hell is she going to do when she says goodbye to Y/n?
She sniffles and Y/n pulls her closer. "Hey... Are you crying again, you big baby?"
Jennie wants to say that she loves her, that Y/n makes her heart feel like it's overflowing, but what's the point? Y/n is right. It's just going to hurt more if she says something stupid now, so she keeps her mouth shut.
"Let's at least exchange numbers," Jennie mumbles. "You don't have to talk to me, and I promise I will keep my messages to a minimum."
Y/n chuckles. "Okay. Let's do that."
But they don't.
They forget.
-
Y/n stays with her that night.
She plays with Jennie's hair and listens to Jennie's mindless rambling into the early hours of the morning, until Jennie is barely clinging to consciousness, trying to stay away to spend more time with her .
Y/n kisses her cheek and shakes her head. "Go to sleep. I'll come back tomorrow morning."
"Don't you have work?"
"No. I took the whole week off."
Jennie snuggles closer into her. "For me?"
"Yeah, for you."
And Jennie falls asleep with that in mind, a smile grazing her lips and Y/n's gentle hands on her back.
-
Something's not right.
Jennie doesn't feel so good.
It's not just the usual dizziness and confused state of her mind that comes with the insomnia.
It's something else.
She's anxious and jittery and it's like there's an invisible sort of heaviness in her chest and it makes her frown, because it won't go away, no matter how much she stretches or tries to breathe properly.
"What's the matter?" Her grandma asks over breakfast, seeing Jennie shift around nervously, her eyebrows pulled together in irritation.
"I don't know," Jennie mumbles. "Maybe I'm coming down with something. I'll be fine."
She frowns at her. "It might be the weather. It keeps changing. It's going to be cold today. Another thunderstorm."
Jennie sighs and nods her head. "Yeah. That's probably it."
"Why don't you go outside a little? The fresh air might help you." She still looks concerned and Jennie gives her a genuine smile, not wanting her to worry any further. After their conversation yesterday morning, she hasn't been treating her any differently, and Jennie can't even begin to describe how thankful she is, how much she loves her for it.
"Yeah, I will. Don't worry, grandma."
----
New story in the profile <3