This is sort of the prequel to Lost Yourself.
I looked down at the pregnancy test in my hands as tears started to roll. My aunt was waiting for me down the hall with her husband, my cousin, and my boyfriend. They all knew what was going on.
I sighed and leaned against the wall. I couldn't do this, could I? Sure I knew enough about kids but not enough to raise one. Fuck would Juice even want this?
"(Y/N)," Gemma's voice carried down the hall. I had to do this.
"Baby?" Juice said, his voice closer than Gemma's had been. I stepped out of the bathroom and he looked at me expectantly.
I just nodded and started crying.
"Are these happy tears or sad?" He asked softly.
"I don't know," I said.
"You have options baby."
"Are we ready to be parents?" I asked.
He only nodded and kissed me.
Gemma yelled my full name and demanded and answer. I told her, Clay, and Jax that I was in fact pregnant and they all looked varying degrees of shocked.
"What are you going to do?" Clay asked.
"I don't know yet," I cut a glare at Clay. "So keep your mouths shut til we figure it out."
"Why don't you move in with me," Juice suggested. I nodded and we went to my room to grab a few of my things.
We left and went to his apartment.
The next two months were amazing. We had decided to keep the baby. Juice's time as a prospect was almost up. Things couldn't have been going better.
I was at work one day and something just didn't feel right.
"Gemma, get Juice," I said, moving away from the office desk.
"What's going on baby?"
"Something's wrong with the baby," I said.
She yelled for Juice and he came running.
"I need to go to the hospital," I said, pain shooting through my stomach. He nodded and took my car keys, helping me to the car.
When we arrived at the ER, they immediately took us back to a room. The doctors were racing around me as the pain intensified. I started to cry as the doctors explained the tests they were running.
"I'm so sorry," the doctor said. "You're having a miscarriage. The fetus is dying."
"Is there anything you can do?" Juice asked.
The doctors shook their heads no and Juice and I both started to cry more.
Several hours and a medical procedure to remove the fetus later, we were headed home. We both immediately went to our bed. I cuddled into his side as I called Gemma and told her what happened.
When I hung up, Juice took my hand in his.
"I know this is going to be hard baby," he said. "But we'll get through it together."
"Yeah," I said. "Together."
"What's wrong?"
I just sighed. "I feel like I did something wrong like somehow I could've prevented this."
"You we're doing everything right. We made sure of it."
"Yeah," I said softly.
He kissed my head as I started to drift off.
His phone ringing woke me up a couple hours later.
"The club needs me baby," he said as he stood up.
"I need you too Juice," I said.
"Hey, I'll be back before you know it. You just stay in bed and rest up."
I nodded and he kissed my head.
"I love you."
"You too," I said. He took off out the door.
Being alone made me realize I didn't know what to do or how to handle this. A part of me had died that day with our kid, and I was lost because of it.
I decided to go for a drive. They always clear my head. I grabbed my go bag and left my prepaid on the bed side table.
I got in my car and started diving east, deciding after a couple hours that I wasn't going back to
Charming until I found myself.