TW// VIOLENCE!!
Don't breathe. Don't move. Don't. Do. Anything.
Kieran drove painfully slow. I sat in the backseat with my head down, picking at my cuticles and barely even breathing because who knows, maybe that would be his last straw before crashing the car to kill us both. I wouldn't know. I don't know what he's thinking and that's the worst part.
Dare I look up and find we lock eyes, that might make him strangle me to death. I only had enough gut in me to stare at his knuckles turn pale white around the steering wheel. That's how his hands are going to look when he strangles me to death. I instantly darted my eyes back down, piping down the cries ready to come.
Oh, fuck. What did I do in my past life to end up living this hell rotten life now?! There's too many scenarios of what Kieran could possibly have in mind and I don't have a clue on which one would be the cause of my end. All Kieran was doing was driving and he already made me want to hide in the deepest and darkest corner in the world, and never come out. His silence was louder than any words. Sitting in this small space with him was suffocating me, haunting me, taunting me and there was nothing I could do about it. Other than silently cry.
Too lost within my spinning head, I hadn't noticed the car come to a stop. Where are we? This place is deserted. My heart began to thump loudly everywhere in my body, I could feel it in my neck, ears, hands and legs. I mean everywhere. The fact that Kieran sat there silently made me choke on my own breath.
An exhale finally came from Kieran. He opened his car door, slamming it shut when he was out. I watched as he removed his winter coat and suit jacket, not a thought behind those wicked eyes.
I took this chance to let out all of the fucking cries I've been holding in this whole time. God, please please let me see another day. I never wanted this to happen. I just wanted to live peacefully. I ran my hands through my hair and coughed out the rest of my weeps just as Kieran swung my door open.
Oh fuck. Maybe I should've never left.
Kieran threw his jackets in the car like I wasn't there and from the corner of my eyes, I saw him roll the sleeves of his dress shirt up. More unwanted tears dropped from my eyes. Stop crying, it's just going to make things worse.
"Suriah," He said too calmly. Shit.
Kieran sighed enthusiastically. He acts like this shit isn't happening. I turned my head to the side, trying to cover the amount of tears flowing out of my eyes.
"What a buzz kill," He said tonelessly.
I turned to look at him for the first time but met with his hands charging at me. Kieran pushed me further inside of the car adburtly and crawled into the tiny space, hovering above me. He slammed the car door shut, blocking the outside world off. I struggled weakly beneath him with even more tears starting to pour out of my eyes to the point where I started sobbing uncontrollably.
"Shh, shh," Kieran hushed, wiping my tears away, "Don't cry,".
Fuck! That's making shit worse.
"Suriah, don't cry," Kieran said in a more stern manner. Almost like an order.
I huffed out, tightening my lips closed to muffle the cries coming out. Kieran wiped away the rest of the bothersome tears blurring my eyes.
"Do you know what I had to do?" Kieran asked, tracing his hands up my arms. A terrifying shiver crawled up my spine.
"Well," He sighed, "I had to walk back inside, empty handed, with several people asking me where my partner was,".
I gasped lightly.
"I didn't know what to say," He sighed innocently, his fingers stroking my hands, "I had to tell them you felt sick, so I sent you home,"
Kieran suddenly crashed down on my wrists, one of them being newly hurt by him not even a couple days ago. I yelped out, trying my hardest to snatch them away from Kieran but he did not budge. He didn't even flinch. If anything he took my reaction as a sign to squeeze them tighter.
Kieran leaned down, our noses almost touching, "Because I didn't know where the fuck you went,".
The pain was one that felt like it was never going to go away, a pain that I desperately needed to escape from but did have the power to do so. I gasped out lifting my head in anguish. Fuck! It hurts! I opened my eyes that stared directly into the eyes of a heartless beast.
His eyes were so dark, I couldn't see past his fury. There was nothing in his eyes that I could understand.
"Please...," I cried, keeping my eyes locked with Kieran's, "K-Kieran...please let go...,".
"Why should I?" Kieran furrowed his eyebrows irritatingly.
"It hurts!" I gasped.
Kieran squeezed tightly on my wrists before letting them go. I held them close to my chest, huffing loudly. Kieran ran a hand through his hair. He waited for me to catch my breath and you best believe I took my time. I sighed out gently before flinching to look over at Kieran staring daggers at me. How is he so nonchalant? How can he act so heartless?
He leaned forward, clutching my face in one hand, "You make me mad,".
"So mad in fact, I'd kill myself and you so neither of us would be happy," Kieran practically spitted on me. He threw my face aside.
It's like I'm a piece of trash he's tossing around.
"I mean," He scoffed, "What kind of stupid mentality do you have to fuck up this bad? Hm?".
A desperate one. I flinched at his tone, barely rising. I looked away and bit down on my lip roughly.
Kieran snatched my face back up, "Don't bite your fucking lip,".
His dark aura slowly pierced my soul. I wiggled my eyebrows before releasing my lip.
"Answer the question," he ordered.
My lip quivered and no words were able to get past the lump in my throat.
"What mentality do you have to-,"
"A-a desperate one," I gasped out, more afraid of Kieran repeating himself.
He stared at me blankly. His lips twitched into a grin before he shook his head and sighed.
"Desperate? He scoffed, "Are you desperate Suriah?".
I shut my eyes, feeling the warm tears roll down my face. I nodded.
"Desperate for what?".
"...to escape,".
"Oh my god," He rolled his head back and tossed my face aside, "To escape,".
"Yes," I cried.
"Escape? You don't even exist out there!" He screamed.
"YES I DO!".
"No. YOU FUCKING DON'T!".
"YOU KIDNAPPED ME!" I screamed out.
The air filled with the echo of my scream for a long minute. I pushed my eyebrows together, putting all the tears aside to finally get some words in.
"You kidnapped me, Kieran," I gasped, "You can't expect me t-to want to stay with you after everything that's happened Everything you did to me!".
His eyes, still cold and empty, stared back into my emotional ones.
"You took my life away. Locked me up. Of course I'm going to want to escape," I sighed out.
Kieran, turned his head to the side and brushed his hair away from his face. His jaw clenched. Maybe he'll actually understand. I leaned forward, ready to extend my hand and caress his cheek when Kieran's blazing eyes stabbed right through my heart. They were the most furious I'd ever seen them get.
I pulled myself back, trying to get away from him in this tiny space.
"Well, that's a shame," He groaned, a smile treading across his lips devilishly, "Because I'm about to do it again,".
My mouth opened, ready to scream bloody fucking murder when Kieran, sent a sharp hand across my face. He left no time for me to process it and threw a fist directly into my stomach. I screamed out grabbing onto his hair and trying to yank him down. He grabbed my wrists and yanked them away, pinning them under his knees.
The car swayed back and forth from the fight between the both of us. I was doing anything I could to hurt him back. All seemed hopeless.
Kieran banged my head against the door, repeatedly until I was able to slip a hand from under his knees and block my face. I used my free hand to slap Kieran directly on the cheek. I lifted my torso up and freed my other hand, pushing Kieran as hard as I could away from me.
I didn't fucking wait to turn around and open the car door. Only, it was locked. Fuck, child lock.
I flipped back and kicked Kieran away and threw myself between the driver and passenger seat, crawling desperately. Unlucky enough, Kieran held my foot in his inhuman grasp, twisting it however he pleased to the point where I let out a screeching yell. What the fuck?! What did he just do?! I snapped my head back and screamed even more as Kieran twisted my ankle aggressively.
I held onto the seats with Kieran yanking me back with all his strength. I grunted out and screamed with all my might to escape from his grip but he was snaked around me. I cried out loudly when Kieran grabbed a fist of my hair and yanked me back. I was slammed into the cushioned seat but still felt a pain rattle my body. Kieran dived at me, kneeing wherever he pleased, punching me wherever he pleased and targeted my neck.
"Let," I grunted, fighting against his arms, "GO!".
Kieran pressed all his weight down on me, giving me no room to shuffle or even squirm and snaked his hands around my neck. Tightly. I'm sure he felt my heartbeat pounding rapidly in his grasp. My nails scraped into his skin but didn't do shit. The tighter his grip went, the more out of breath I became.
"I care about you, Suriah," He groaned, "I do,".
"And I thought you cared about me. I thought, stupidly, that we finally had something going. A life to look forward to. Then you,".
Kieran leaned down, staring into my eyes that cried for help.
"You ruined it all, like you always do," He flatly scoffed, "All you are is meaningless promises. Running off of lies,".
I reached out, clinging to Kieran's collar. I can't breathe. Let me go.
"When I showed you my love, my care, and affection. Anything! You stabbed me right in the back, just like everyone else," Kieran, turned away.
Tears slipped from my eyes, wetting his hands.
Can't...breathe.
"Just when I thought you loved me like I love you...you tear my heart apart," Kieran mumbled.
Can't...breathe.
"You said you'd never leave me,".
I can't fucking breathe.
Whatever Kieran was saying wasn't even reaching my ears. The blaring ringing inside my ears and my breath sneaking away from me, were stronger than his words. This can't be it. I don't want to die.
I shut my eyes begging for someone to save me in this abandoned parking lot. I don't want to die. I felt the blood rise to my face, blurring my vision and distorting my reality. Please, please...I don't want to die. I opened my eyes once again in search of anything that could help me escape Kieran's grip before I passed out.
Looking down, Kieran's phone glimmered in the moonlight. I let go of Kieran's arms and reached as far down as I could, grabbing the phone with two fingers. I slid it up and clutched down on the phone for my fucking life. I don't want to die. I can do this. I pursed my lips.
My hand swung back, using the edge of the phone to bash into Kieran's head. And it worked. Kieran's deadly grasp released me and I gasped for air as I still continued to use the phone to bash his head in.
He covered his head and looked in my fightful eyes, swinging everywhere to hit me. I noticed very faint blood stain his forehead. I didn't stop. I continued until his vision, I'm sure, was covered in his and my blood.
I turned around, finally hopping into the driver's seat and opened that door like heaven's gates. Run, Suriah. Run. I ditched the heels I had on and pursued down the empty parking lot for dear life even if my breath still hadn't caught up with me.
My chest burned. My lungs throbbed. My heart shattered. The ankle Kieran twisted burned insanely, though I cared more about my freedom than some sprained ankle.
The car lights turning on behind me only made me run even faster. I hit a lesser busy street and darted left even if I didn't know where I was going. Don't stop moving. Keep going.
I clutched down on something in my hand. I looked down and saw Kieran's phone still in my hand. Oh shit.
I turned around, Kieran not in view. I panically looked around. What do I do? Do I hide? Keep running? My lungs made the decision for me, if I kept running, I'd eventually collapse in the middle of the road and be presented freely to kieran like some 5 star meal.
I took one last look around and swiftly entered a store with a crowd of people. I sped to the farthest corner away from any windows and sat down, staring at the locked phone. Fuck. What's his password!? Fuck!
I ran a frustrated hand through my hair, with tears of panic streaming down my face. Come on. Remember. I've seen him type it in a couple of times. I stared passionately at the screen. I don't remember. God damn it. Of course I'd be more than happy to ask someone, anyone, for help but the chances of getting sold out, again, were much higher than actually getting help. Trust no one. No. One. Emanuel was a clear fucking example of that.
I lifted the phone and in the light, I saw Kieran's fingerprints. I raised the phone higher. Oh shit. This is my way in. I spun the phone around finding the most used numbers until I finalized the top 4.
Okay. I only get a couple tries before it locks. Make every try count.
I typed in my first guess. Wrong. I sighed, pursing my lips together. My eyes searched the room for Kieran and the coast was clear. C'mon. I took a shaky breath, trying again and again. To my surprise, it worked. I almost screamed right then and there. Kieran, you goddamn idiot! More tears ripped from my eyes.
My shaking hands hit the phone app and instantly typed in the number that first came to mind, inside my clouded head.
I lifted the phone to my ear, listening to the anticipating ringing.
"Hello?" He said. God he sounds so surreal.
I gasped, a stinging pain vibrating in my throat, "M-meek..?".
A long pause passed, "Who is this?".
"Meek...i-it's," I took a deep breath, shuffling in my seat, "It's N-Noor,".
"Noor?" He exclaimed.
"Y-yes!" I panted. My voice was getting weaker by the second, "Meek...p-please help m-me...,".
"Noor, where are you right now?" He asked worriedly.
I looked around, more than afraid to find Kieran hiding somewhere. He was nowhere in sight and I took the chance to get the names of the streets I was on. Barely whispering it into the phone. He fucked up my throat.
"Noor, stay right there. I'm on my way, okay?" Meek explained to me.
My lungs, hurt from earlier, ached violently. I tried to get as much air as I could but it hurt too much. It was as if small needles pierced my chest everytime I took a deep breath. Not to mention, it was almost impossible to speak and if I tried it was a meer peep.
My head spun a hundred miles per hour and my heart was on its last life. I didn't care about the blood coming from who knows where, the fresh scratches, the tremendous bruises or my sprained ankle.
None of it mattered to me. No matter how much it fucking hurt.
I hunched over the table, letting my head rest.
"Noor?".
Don't close your eyes. Stay awake.
But I'm tired.
I pushed my eyebrows together, tears of pure fear strolling down my face. He's going to find me if I stay put. He always finds me. I shut my eyes, wrapping my cold arms around my trembling body. My head hurts.
Slowly, but gradually, my thoughts which fought each other endlessly, faded away.
My eyes closed, the only thing I payed attention to was abundance of the store or restaurant I was in. In a way, easing me. The clinks of places and cups all sounded like a vivid dream. Yet, I loved it. Being able to hear people around me, freely. I'm okay. I'm going to be okay.
God forbid Kieran finds me. There wouldn't be much left he could do to me, it already feels like I'm dying. Like I died.
The warm aura of this store held my collapsing heart dearly, holding me just enough to keep me from falling apart. I wheezed out, finally getting a gasp of air down my damaged throat. My eyes fluttered closed, warm tears wrapping me in their comfort.
I'm so tired.
Everything hurts...so much.
Why can't it all go away...
And as the voices inside the small store distorted, I heard Meek's angel-like voice clearly.
"Noor? Are you there? I'm on my way, okay? Stay right there, I'm going to get you,".
I'm here, Meek. Please save me...