Leah POV
Watching Sophie walk away was the hardest moment of my life. Is this how she felt when she watched me walk away in the airport that day?
My relationship with Sophie had a lot of hurdles, most of which we managed to overcome. When she told me about the job, I knew from her tone that she was torn. It hurt; I can't deny that. Mostly because in that moment, it became a reality that both of us had ties to separate countries.
Sophie made me feel happiness in a way that no one had before. Her smile warmed my heart, and her laugh echoed through my brain like my favourite song. Her love was like no other love I had experienced before, making me determined to never leave her unless she wanted me to do so.
When Rhys texted me, a part of me hoped that he was texting to tell me to convince her to go. My heart broke when I read what he was saying. Rhys is one of the most important people in Sophie's life; he knows her inside and out. That's how I knew that I had to leave; that's how I knew that I was doing the right thing, even if it hurt.
When I returned to London, I went into myself. The old Leah that would prop herself in the corner of the room was back. I stayed in my apartment for nights on end, hoping that Sophie would turn up. I was hoping that I would get to be in one of those film scenes where the soulmates find each other again.
That's when I saw it. Hannah had posted a picture of herself posing on the stairs. Her legs dangling over the last three steps, a very tanned face beaming at the camera being held by an unseen person. I knew it was weird, stalking your ex's ex, but I couldn't stalk Sophie. I wasn't ready for the heartbreak of seeing her happy without me. That could be anywhere, Leah. I told myself as I zoomed into the picture. There it was. Second step, right-hand side. The small stain that Sophie and I couldn't get out of the carpet was a stain caused by her inability to hold onto her wine glass as I carried her upstairs in a hurry.
This was something I couldn't pretend I hadn't seen; it had ignited a jealousy in me that was so intense that I wanted to move on. I wanted to forget that Sophie Kelly had ever existed. Well, I told myself that anyway.
I did the only thing I knew how to do in these situations: I called Georgia. Georgia was an expert at networking and finding a match for people who wanted to hook up. That's all I wanted; I wanted Sophie to not be the last person I had slept with, because I knew now I wasn't her last person. It was immature; I knew that, but it was all I could do right now.
Georgia organised a night out in Soho, and most of our football connections were there. I kept giving her wide eyes at the fact that I was not going to get along with any of these people; she just winked at me each time. Halfway through the night, a brunette entered our VIP lounge. I felt like my eyes spun in my head when I looked at her, and her style was everything I wanted to be.
"Leah, this is Harleigh." Georgia said as she introduced us.
"Leah." I smiled at her.
"Lovely to meet you. You look beautiful." She said.
"That's not an English accent; where are you from?" I said, trying to sound like I knew what I was doing.
"New Zealand." She smiled.
Fuck sake, New Zealand. That's where Hannah came from. Why can't I stop thinking about Sophie and Hannah together? Their bodies touching. I feel sick.
Despite my previous thoughts, Harleigh and I had a good laugh together. As closing approached, we found our lips together in the middle of the dance floor, her hands telling me that she was hoping for more than this tonight. We left the bar, both hopping into a taxi that was directed to my apartment.
Harleigh wasted no time when we entered the apartment; immediately I was pushed against the wall. My body began to find a rhythm that matched hers, prompting me to lead her into my bedroom. As our clothes began to fall to the floor, I was looking at someone I knew as Harleigh, but all I could see was Sophie. I was reminded of the times we had been like this after weeks apart when we couldn't wait a second longer. Our lips only came apart to allow us to whisper, I love you.
Harleigh noticed that my body had now tensed up; it had frozen, and nothing she could do would salvage the night at this stage.
"I'm sorry." I sighed.
"It's okay; no harm done. I can go if you like?" Harleigh smiled.
"It's late; you should stay. I'm just not ready for that; I should've realised that before I led you on." I exhaled.
"Ex?"
"Yeah. Just feels weird, you know? First time with anyone that isn't her?"
"Yeah. I get that. I like hanging out with you; I don't need that kind of stuff to want to continue that."
"Thank you for being so understanding." I smiled, lightly hugging her.
"I'm still trying to get over my ex too, we're both a little messed up right now." She laughed.
After that conversation, Harleigh and I continued to enjoy each other's company. After a few 'dates' we kissed again, this time stopping before it went any further.
The night before Sophie arrived, Harleigh and I had gotten drunk at a friend's birthday. We came home and slept together for the first time. It wasn't how I had wanted it to play out; I believe in making the first time special, but after 2 months of just sharing kisses and cuddling in bed, the tension had come out through our alcohol.
When Sophie arrived that night, I had to close the door. Harleigh wasn't home, but her stuff was all over my apartment, our clothes still lining a trail from the hallway to the bedroom as I had been too hungover to tidy up all day. I grabbed my coat and slipped my shoes on, swallowing back my tears as I thought of taking that step with Harleigh last night, thinking I would never see Sophie again.
I walked us to a coffee shop, telling Sophie to sit down while I placed the order. I know she knew I was staring at her; I couldn't help it. Her perfect skin, long hair, and dancing eyes were making my stomach do backflips.
I thought of not telling her about Harleigh, but when I realised what she was about to say, I didn't want her to feel stupid. I blurted it out, unable to look her in the eye as I knew that I would cry.
She tried so hard to act like it was fine. I know she thinks that she was too late. I think I was too early; if I'd just waited to let her make the decision, then none of this would've happened.
"I took the job." Those words will ring through my ears for the rest of my life.
They were words I had longed to hear for so long, but hearing them that night made me feel useless. Sophie, the person that I loved, was living in London. She had taken the biggest risk for love, and there I was standing in the street, knowing I'd given up the most intimate parts of myself to someone else last night. Hearing those words made me realise that if Sophie took the job, she definitely didn't take that picture of Hannah. She had always said that she would offer the house to Hannah to buy before she would sell it to anyone else; it had been Hannah's dream, not Sophie's.
How could you be so fucking stupid, Leah?
I cried myself to sleep that night, pretending to Harleigh that I was feeling unwell to prevent her from coming over. My heartbreak was made the slightest bit lighter by the comfort of knowing that Sophie and I shared the same land tonight.