Chapter 20- "How perverted can you be!?"
SCARLETT POV
A few minutes are all it takes for the bottled up store of tears to turn into a torrent of sadness. I don't even really know why I am crying so much. All that I can understand at this point is that Nathan is the alpha and omega of my tears. For someone who vowed never to let a guy this close ever, I'm sure a big mess.
It's not as if I didn't trust Nathan with my heart; he'd proved himself to be worthy of it long, long ago. It's just that after the whole fiasco with Jonathan, trusting any guy besides Emmett and Evan a whole hundred percent was an uphill task. I brought myself to trust Nate, although I haven't exactly spilled all my secrets yet. And I didn't want anything to spoil what I had with Nathan. But if I was being honest with myself, the only thing that could spoil what we had was me.
Ever since the whole truth with Nathan and Dad was revealed, I have hardly been able to think of Nathan in the same way. It is not like whatever happened was his fault, but then again, it wasn't mine either. I know the argument is not at all mature, but I don't find being punished for Oliver's death right.
Sure, it wasn't a punishment in the conventional way. But losing your brother, and your parents (technically!), all in the span of a month and a half, cannot have been easy. And although I do not want any sympathy, I do want people to empathize with me and tell me I'm not overreacting.
A cough brings me back to the present and I'm snapped out of my reverie immediately. The girls are looking at me with concern lacing their features and I know there is nothing left to do but to spill it all out. I take a deep breath, compose myself and tell them everything, this time, along with how I felt about the whole incident.
"What you are feeling is, although immature, completely justified. I do not know if lashing out at Nathan would be the right thing to do. But if that's what it takes to get over your apprehensions about being able to date him any longer, then go and have a talk with him." Lauren states.
"But, but, what about the girls' night out? Aren't we supposed to be having fun with each other?" I ask.
"Well, I'm pretty sure not one of us can have fun while you wear this expression of complete and utter sadness on your face. It's not really something best friends do." Allie replies.
"Yeah. She is right. Scar, at this point, nothing we can tell you will make you feel better or comfort you even a bit. What you need at this point is a talk with Nathan. And once that's done, a bear hug, a peck on the cheek and some good-natured flirting." Adrian says, causing my cheeks to turn crimson red.
"Like all the romance books say... Sometimes all you need to put things right once again is that one look from the guy you love." Allie replies, to no one in particular.
"So should I go over to Emmett's or call him here?" I ask.
"Why don't we all go over there? Um, Ricky and I, we, uh, we kind of need to talk." Adrian stammers.
"Do you guys want to talk? Or do you want to shove your tongue down his throat?" I ask.
Adrian blushes and almost incomprehensibly lets out a small whisper, "If I'm being honest to myself, a little bit of both."
We all laugh and make our way downstairs to get out of the house.
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I feel a little bit more relaxed as we cross the street to make our way to Emmett's place. Him and Adrian live only a few blocks away, so going over wasn't a problem. If I'm being true to myself, I'm actually jumping at the sight of hearing the clarion voice that made me believe in love once more.
We don't bother knocking on the door since we know there's no one but the guys at home. Emmett's parents are away, visiting his elder brother Max at Georgetown. Max is twenty and on the verge of finishing college. He's training to be a chef. When we last spoke about Max, he was doing really well.
I walk into an almost deserted house. For a split second, weird and paranoid thoughts flit through my mind. I almost consider the possibility of the house being robbed and the guys being kidnapped, before I hear a muffled giggle. I switch on the lights and the guys are sprawled over the sofa, ready to pounce on us. Too bad for them, we already figured it out.
I stick my tongue out at Evan and scan the room for Nathan. He's sitting on the tabletop, across the couch. He's wearing that oversized jersey once more, and only the fact that Evan and Emmett are watching me check out my boyfriend with smirks, stops me from drooling.
Composing myself, I mock slap them on their faces before I go over to Nate. He doesn't quite look up to meet my eyes. I don't know if he's mad, guilty, or a little bit of both.
When I look over my shoulder for help on how to approach him, I find an empty hallway. The girls have already left me alone. I swear, the only time these idiots will give me privacy is when I don't want it. Not wanting to waste any time, I clear my throat.
Nathan looks up, his chocolate brown eyes piercing through my façade of being alright. I know he has already figured out that all's not well even before I can speak.
"Hi", he says awkwardly.
Not having any other way to reply, I say Hello in response.
Nathan nods his head and starts fiddling with his fingers once more. I straighten the strap on my watch and clear my throat once again.
"Nate, we need to talk." I say.
"I kind of figured that because I doubt you like me enough to keep on staring at my crop of black, glossy hair." He replies, his tone a little teasing.
"So, um, I guess all I have to say is that I'm really, really sorry for acting the way I have for the past two days. I had no right to shut you out completely, especially since whatever happened wasn't in the least your fault." I choke out.
He gives me a watery smile. "It's not like I tried to talk to you either. I think that I would have reacted in pretty much the same way had my Dad done something of that sort to me."
"Nah. I think you're just saying that to make me feel better." I reply.
"Scar, I doubt I like you enough to lie about what I believe." He replies with an impish grin on his face.
The sight of his soft lips and shiny white teeth makes my heart melt. A sudden feeling of warmth spreads through my body. With great difficulty, I resist the urge to shove my tongue down his throat.
"So, you really think that I didn't overreact?" I ask, just to confirm what I just heard.
"Well, you may have overreacted. I am no one to judge that. But what I can say to you is that I didn't really mind. I mean, I obviously felt bad that you shut me out for two days, but I don't think I can be mad at you for it. What you did wasn't right. But what you felt was. Scar, while doing this, your heart was in the right place. Sure, I felt bad but someone has to be mature, right?" he finishes, winking at me.
"What I'm gathering from that is that you're not mad at me..." I say.
"Damn right, I'm not. I could never be Scarlett Woods. I like you too much to be mad at you." He says, his dimpled smile lighting up his whole face.
I blush a little.
"I may like you enough to stare at your glossy, black crop of hair after all, Cullen." I reply.
Thrown off guard, Nate's cheeks also turn a delicate shade of pink. Satisfied that I affect him as much as he affects me, I smile.
Nathan looks around, pushes a stray lock of hair behind my ear, and holds my face in his arms. He looks straight into my green eyes and his intense gaze is enough to keep me still.
Suddenly, I hear peals of laughter from behind me. I look over my shoulder and I see Emmett sprawled on the floor, clutching his stomach, pretending to wipe away a tear from his eyes.
"Emmett Martin, you had better insure your balls real quick because once I'm done with you, there ain't gonna be any left!" I scream, perfectly annoyed.
"God, Scarlett! How perverted can you be? I'm so not having it with you!" he says with a huge smirk on his face.
"YOU EVIL MORON! Just wait!" I bellow. Snatching a couple of cushions from the couch, I run behind him, smacking him on the head with them.
What Emmett Martin just ruined might as well have been my first real kiss.
Emmett ducks behind Allie, who is smirking at me with her hands on her hips. Adrian and Lauren are sending suggestive glances my way while Evan and Ricky are making whip-like sounds to embarrass Nate.
This was a house full of mad people. But then again, I had gladly consented to be one of them, hadn't I?
"So... Scarlett.. Should we get going? Unless you want to stay and finish what you started, of course...!" Adrian comments suggestively.
I glare at her and she just smirks back. Unable to control the slow blush spreading over my face anymore, I run out of the house. I cannot let Nathan know exactly how much he affects me.
For one, he would never stop teasing me about it. Secondly, it'll just show him how much he means to me. And much as I trust him, I think I'll take my time before admitting exactly who he is to me. And maybe, I will also take my time telling him about Oliver.
And I guess, if Nathan is really someone who gets me, who likes me a lot, he will understand why it took me time to tell him about Oliver. If he really does like me as much as he says he does, he will understand why I don't like speaking about the day that Oliver died.
If I'm really that important to Nathan, I bet he will really understand what it felt like to be me that day.
I hope he does. I cannot afford to lose him. I just cannot. I have always been mentally weak when it came to losing people. My self-esteem has plummeted ever since my parents left after Oliver's death. It crashed down more when Jonathan left. If Nathan were to leave me, I suppose I would probably have no more self-esteem left to lose.
I'm more invested in him than I let on.
As I'm just across the road from Adrian's house, I hear someone screaming my name from behind my shoulder. I don't bother to pay attention because it's just Lauren, teasing me about my shyness. She runs over and starts teasing me more, but instead of my usual shyness, I go all out and give her a big smirk.
Stunned, she stops. Well, if Lauren thought that she could get away with teasing me always, she'd better think again.
As we walk into Adrian's house, an idea hits me. I know exactly when to come clean to Nathan and all I need now is a little help from three of my closest friends.
If all goes as planned, within about three days, Nathan will know everything there is to know about me. Because when I realize that it's the 10th today, I also realize that he has given me enough time to open up.
He's told me a little about his past as well. We have spoken about his parents quite a bit; something he says he hasn't spoken about to anyone else except Lauren and me. And all he knows about me is the whole Jonathan incident. And the fact that he has a slightly crazy, weird, shy and funny idiot for a girlfriend.
Somehow, telling him about Oliver when we celebrate one month of being together really appeals to me. I've always loved to celebrate the significance of stuff. I'm really into celebration, although my idea of celebration isn't exactly conventional.
It's more like curling up on the couch with a Harry Potter book and some food. Granted, I do that every other day but that's only because every other date has something interesting to offer. For example, the 13th of every month is now my favorite day. The 21st of every month is now my second favorite. I had gotten glasses on the 21st of March a couple of years ago. And if you knew how the world looks to me without my glasses, you'd understand why I appreciate them so much!
And while it might seem a very nerdy and geeky thing to do, I actually love it. I find it therapeutic and relaxing. Plus, didn't everyone I cared about already know that I was one of the biggest nerds they'd ever know?
"Earth to Scarlett! What are you thinking about?! Gosh, we left Nathan ten minutes behind and yet all you can do is think of him!!" Adrian says.
I shake my head and apologize for being so dreamy. Then, I tell them about my plan to tell Nathan everything about Oliver. They are all in complete agreement and by the time we're home, I start to feel tons better about sharing.
It's the first time I'm actually looking forward to sharing my feelings. It's a good change in me and I have only these friends of mine to thank. Suddenly, I run towards them, envelop them in a bear hug and just stay there for a few minutes.
"Ughhh! Get off me now you dwerp!" Lauren complains.
Laughing, I move away and sit on a bean bag in Adrian's bedroom. It's time for the girls' night to begin and I sure will not be talking about Nathan anymore.
There's a lot of hotter guys like Brian out there to be gossiped about after all!
A/N:-
All I can say is that I'm extremely sorry for the very late update. I do not have any excuse for it.
I cannot say when I will update next. What I can say is that I will update for sure.
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