I had to see him with my own eyes.
The boy that everyone seems to make a fuss about.
I'm amazed how Belleth just let me come with him to the boy's training sessions. He must trust me deeply.
What a fool.
Come to think of it, they're all fools. Letting a mere human do their dirty work for them is basically opening the door for betrayal. Both Belleth and Michael think they have got me on a leesh. Yet, the opposite is true.
I am a free spirit.
Lailah thought she had it all figured out. She was the Queen of angels, after all. She had no need for a human after giving birth to a holy child. She ditched me like the garbage she thought I was. She used me like human livestock, she disposed of me thinking I will never come back to her life.
Until I took her own son from her.
It was as easy as baking an apple pie. The guards still trusted me, the Oracles let me in with happy faces.
I took the baby, and I left.
Now, I have to see what became of the baby, not because Michael ordered me to, but because my curiosity got the better of me. Not because Belleth let me inside the fake house, but because I let myself, knowing I was a faithful servant of the demon King.
I am a free spirit, after all.
The first time I saw him, he was on his knees, his forehead touching the floor. His face was invisible to me, but his mere presence chilled me to the bone. He withered in pain, low wailing coming out of his lips.
The first day, I sat on a faraway chair, watching him as he stood up over and over again, his legs trembling, his lower lip bleeding, his eyes scarlet red, spitting out pure hatred.
He used himself as a target. He always held a small knife, inflicting wounds on his forearms, only for them to be projected on a human victim, chained to the adjacent wall, hollowed eyes and ragged clothes, bloodied limbs that have mixed with the dirt of the basement, looking like a doll that has been abandoned for ages.
His wounds would heal shortly after, and as three days went by, the boy stopped using himself as a voodoo doll, and started training with a sword instead. A pitch black sword, its hilt shining with lava, as though it was made from the deepest pits of Hell. He always fought with Belleth, and he always lost.
The black wings grew on the fifth day. Tiny feathers appeared on his naked back. I heard from Belleth that the tea his mother gave him was finally doing its job. On that same day, I decided to approach him. Alone in the dark basement, in the rare minutes of rest Belleth gave him, he looked like a wounded animal, caressing his aching arms, putting bandages on his injured legs.
"Hello" , I dared to say, leaning to the level of his colorless eyes.
"Aren't you the dog who hides in my master's shadow" , he spat. It wasn't really a question. It was a pure manifestation of words as sharp as his hellish sword. He looked up from his wounds only to glare at me, his eyes turning the color of his blood.
I put both palms up in surrender. "I'm not who you think I am, but you don't care about that, do you?"
"What do you want? I'm busy with my training. Leave me be" , he hissed, a grimace twisting his scarred lips.
"Who are you? Who are you, really, Noah Redwood?"
The question seemed to catch him off guard. His eyes widened, his grimace disappeared, his lips remained half open, watching me closely, waiting for me to say more. I didn't. I waited too.
For him to notice. I know he is not stupid. I know he can read my intention in the question.
I am not asking about the identity his parents gave him.
I am asking about the true nature of his soul.
It's the question I asked Lailah, back when we first met. It somehow always works.
"What do you mean?" , he looked confused, not believing what he had just understood.
"Don't feign ignorance" , I whispered, afraid of Belleth's sharp ears. "Tell me more about yourself. What do you like doing? What are your goals? What is your comfort zone? Did you ever fall in love? How was it like?"
I'm curious. I'm curious. I'm curious.
This broken doll pretends to be a merciless killer because that's what everyone wants it to be. But I know. I know it's a boy. It's just a boy who wants to live.
A boy who happens to be my son.
Lailah, what have we given birth to? Tell me, tell me.
"Tell me" , I urged him.
"I...." , he grabs his head in his hands and shuts his eyes tight. When he opens them, they are completely white, shining like two moons in the darkness of the basement. "I don't know. I've only ever lived in my dreams....and now, I can't even remember them."
It must be the tea that's doing this to him.
"Do you want me to find out for you?" , I whisper in his right ear. "Aren't you curious too?"
To my surprise, he nodded, over and over, his eyes, for a second, shifted to a light blue color. Was it my imagination?
It must be.
"Then let's find out"
*****************************
On the sixth day, I risked my own discovery. I went all the way to Lailah's chambers. Michael was nowhere to be seen, and the Queen seemed to be gone somewhere with him. He had mentioned having a long meeting with the rest of the angel guards, preparing for the War. Two days were left.
The Oracles love me, for some unknown reason. Perhaps because I was the only free spirit in the universe, doing what I pleased, going where I wanted, when I wanted it.
I asked for information about Noah's past, ever since he was born to the moment I met him in that dark corner of the demon house.
They told me everything.
They made me live everything.
I was a little boy, once again. I thought I was better than everyone. I was born to dominate the human race, I was born to be a king.
Then I met her. A girl with ocean dyed hair and honey-filled eyes. A chocolate-colored skin, a voice so alive, so sweet. A crybaby, a brave girl. She made me remember all the good things about being human. The chaos of feelings, all jammed into one innocent brain, discovering the world. We had lunch together on the roof, when I was still a newly-made wooden doll, its heart yet incomplete. We met an evil demon who had an identity issue. I knew what it's like to hold someone's hand, to be the light in someone's darkness. I discovered the unbearable feeling of loss, when I thought she was gone forever. We walked through the gleaming streets of Shibuya, looking for something to help us in our quests. We learned to trust each other and fear the rest of the world. Then, just like falling asleep, eyes getting drifted off with the current, brain shutting down one area after another, I fell in her love, her warmth embracing the cold in my limbs, pumping a new kind of blood in my heart, changing the color of my eyes to be the same as her dyed hair. An eternal blue, an ocean filled with our endless memories.
On the seventh day, I rushed down the stairs that led to the basement. Noah was where I left him, recoiling in a corner like a caged bird, standing before him was Belleth, anger emanating from him, blood dripping on the floor from the black sword he held in his right hand, the regular contact of the drops with the growing pool of scarlet joining my racing heartbeats in a song of Death.
"You aren't growing enough" , Belleth hissed. A grave voice, thick as the surrounding walls, echoed in the dark basement, rang in my ears, making me regret my sole existence at that moment.
"I'm sorry" , Noah cried.
"Today is your last chance to become worthy of my praise."
"Yes, master"
Belleth dropped the sword on the floor, a loud clang sounded next, making me nearly piss my pants from the fright. He turned around, looking at me like he wasn't seeing anything at all. He walked past me, glanced once more at the boy, an indecipherable look in his eyes, then quietly left. His footsteps on the spiraling stairs resonated deep within my soul, the fear inside me only intensified, instead of fading away with the physical distance between us.
"Hello Noah" , I started, swallowing what was left of my saliva in an attempt to wet my dried throat. The boy ignored me. He stretched his now fully-grown black wings. He stood up and picked the sword, holding it in both hands. He walked towards a dead human victim, aimed at his chest. He was muttering something I couldn't quite catch.
I grabbed his shoulder. "Wait" I hesitated. "You have no reason to fight" , I hastily said before I could change my mind. "You don't have to become a monster for them."
That's when he looked at me, and I saw it in his eyes. A void that wasn't there a day ago. A hatred that only materialized at this moment. The same hatred that I saw in Belleth's eyes. Scarlet red, not the color of blood, but that of the flames that would devour Earth, once this monster was unleashed.
Time really was a different matter inside the Core. What have they done to you, Noah?
"Why? Why don't you want me to be powerful?" He asked me, his voice raw, rusty from the lack of speech.
"Power isn't the key to happiness!" , I whispered, wishing for it to sound like a scream.
"Happiness? What is that?" , he asked, not seeming the least sarcastic.
"Have you forgotten?" I urged, grabbing both his shoulders and forcing him to look me in the eye. "I told you I will find your dreams, and I did. I even lived them, and now I know. I know that you're just a boy with a wish. A wish to be normal, a wish to be just like any other boy. A wish for love. Have you forgotten? Have you forgotten Hitori Yuuki?!"
"H-Hitori...." Noah repeated. His eyes were wide as ever, shifting from red to blue, then to red again, a chaos of colors, a chaos of memories rising inside him.
"Hitori....Hitori...." He kept at it, his palms covered his mouth, his tears began their endless flow on his wounded cheeks. He gasped, and sobbing came next.
"It's not a dream, It's not a dream---" , I couldn't tell if he was relieved or extremely worried, I doubted he was in the state of both.
I am a free spirit. And a free spirit always does what's right. It's true that I have always resented Lailah for abandoning me, but after seeing the reason for it, I don't blame her.
This boy's life is beautiful. Why waste it on a stupid grudge that has been going on between bored immortal creatures who were too scared to fight for themselves?
"Belleth---Hitori's father...she was supposed to kill him, he took me away--- it wasn't a dream!"
Noah looked at me, his eyes filled with tears, he was about to say something, but the words never made it out of his throat. The color in his irises was suddenly something I never thought I would see in a boy this powerful. Pure terror, just like my own, reflected in his very eyes. It was white. White like the bones of a forgotten corpse, on its way to the irreversible state of decay. He was looking at something, someone behind me, and I knew, at that moment, that we were doomed.
"That's enough" , Belleth spoke directly in my right ear. An amused voice, close to laughter. If I hadn't known better, I would have smiled back at him. If I hadn't known better, then the warm liquid that trickled down my thighs would have stayed in my body.
"You've been too free lately, Kai, haven't you? That's not how a dog should behave. A dog should be on a leesh. Don't you agree?"
My limbs refused to move, my heart had forgotten to pump blood, my brain screamed for me to run, run, run!
"Look, you even pissed on the floor. I need to train you better than this."
"P-please---What I said wasn't---"
"Oh I'm grateful for what you said. Now Noah has a reason to fight. Don't you, Noah? After seeing what the angels are doing to your beloved Hitori."
Belleth stood up, he walked towards Noah, grabbing him from the collar. He, then, dragged him to a nearby sofa, in the far corner of the basement. Noah sat down, the same fear still frozen on his face. He seemed oblivious to Belleth's threats, slowly processing what has happened to him so far, and what they have done to him.
"Love is a double-edged sword. Used the right way, it becomes the most powerful weapon in the world." He laughed uncontrollably at his own twisted words. "I have waited so long, so long for this moment!"
He took out a strange looking dagger, one that had no hilt. He held it from its midst, like two knives glued together from their ends.
A double-edged sword.
"It's time to wake the monster inside the broken-hearted boy"
As he shouted those words, he squeezed the twin-dagger inside his palm , and stabbed Noah in the heart.