TW// SLIGHT VIOLENCE
The sky was still dark, but beyond the darkness, small fluffs of snow falling slowly faintly lit the sky to a dark gray. I watched it pass by the window with Suriah sound asleep in my arms. Her body rose with every breath. The butterflies in my stomach only grew.
I looked down at the top of her head.
She's so warm.
I gently caressed her hair, pushing it away from her face and pulled the blanket up more. The house and the floors were heated but it did get cold occasionally. I snuck away from her and slowly got off the bed making my way downstairs to put breakfast together.
Chocolate pancakes sound nice today.
As I passed through the living room, I switched the TV on low volume. The news played in the background as I began making breakfast. Usually I never ate in the morning, just because I needed to be out of the house and at the company early every single time but ever since Suriah started to cook and bake more, she's got me into the habit of eating every meal of the day. Not to mention, she's gained all the weight she lost earlier and appeared healthier than ever.
"...and folks, lucky enough, Suriah Moon who went missing quite some time ago, has now been found and she's reported that she's going to be just fine. Ms. Moon had apparently gotten lost in one of the state's National Forests while on a trip with her friends," The female anchor said, instantly making me freeze.
The male anchor sighed, "Thank god she was okay,".
"I agree. All of the missing person reports have been dropped and she said she's going to be alright," said the female anchor.
My hand tightened around the whisk.
"Moving on, schools are...,".
I let out the chest aching breath I had been holding in the entire time Sruiah's story was being told, surprisingly enough the whole thing was about 2 minutes long but it felt like an entire goddamn hour. So, everything's dropped. I chuckled to myself, mixing the batter again.
Everythings coming together.
I finished breakfast, with some coffee and fruit. By the time I was finished it was around 7 in the morning, still dark outside with the winter clouds blocking any light trying to pry inside. And it would be like this all day, according to the news.
I picked up the plate I made for Suriah and headed back upstairs. I slowly pushed the door open, finding Suriah still asleep. I sighed and walked to the side of the bed, placing the plate on her nightstand and squatting down beside her.
She's so cute.
I caressed her cheek with the tip of my thumb causing her to nudge closer to my touch.
The blaring ringtone from my phone filled the room instantly, I quickly enough ran over to my phone and silenced it but wasn't quite ready to put the phone down. I read the name at the top of the screen over and over again. Ava.
I tossed my head back, groaning out quietly.
What now?
Over and over, Ava called nonstop. I sighed and looked over to Suriah still sleeping.
My eyes rolled to the back of my head as I answered the phone and walked out of the room.
"What has you calling so early in the morning?" I questioned.
"Kieran," She sniffled, I paused in my steps, "He...,".
My deadpanned expression focused on the nothingness before me as I could see exactly what she was trying to say to me. I closed my eyes and leaned back on my leg, lowering my head.
"Why are you crying Ava?".
"You know why, Kieran. Don't act stupid," She snapped.
"I suppose I should ask why you're crying over this?" I sighed, "After all, we both were treated like shit,".
"Kieran, stop," She cried, "For once can you push aside the past and care,".
I bit on the side of my cheek, pacing back and forth on the balcony of the stairs.
"Why did you call me Ava?" I questioned again.
Ava sighed over the line, wiping her tears away I guessed and sniffled, "You have to come to the manor today. No excuses, it's mandatory,".
My lip twitched but I should have guessed I wouldn't have been able to get out of it this time. It'll only be for a little while, like a side task and after I'll be back here like I never left in the first place. I exhaled.
"See you soon," I said, hanging up right after.
...
God fucking damn it. This is exactly why nice things don't exist. Just one hour, one and I'll be back. I shoved the phone in my pocket and walked back into the room finding the bed empty.
She's awake.
As I entered, Suriah walked out of the bathroom rubbing the sleepiness out of her eyes.
I stopped in my tracks, admiring the view.
She looked up and instantly smiled with her eyes first before her lips twirled.
"Good morning," She greeted, walking up to me with a heavy embrace.
"Good morning," I replied, hugging her right back, "I made breakfast,".
She pulled away, "Oh? What could it be?".
"Chocolate pancakes," I answered.
"I haven't had those in forever," She commented, her eyes glowing up.
"They're on the nightstand," I pointed out.
She turned around, finding the food and didn't hesitate to walk over and start eating. I snickered, turning on my heel and walking into the closet. Something funeral-like will work in case he's actually dead. I pulled out my all black suit I've worn maybe once and walked back out of the room.
Suriah, with a full mouth of food, questionably stared at me. Quickly, she finished and set her plate down.
"You're leaving?" She asked, worry hidden in her voice.
I sighed, "Just for a little,".
"Why?" She pouted.
"Family affairs, my love," I answered, "Trust me, I wouldn't go if I didn't have to,".
"Are you going to be okay?" She asked, standing up and walking over to me.
"I will," I assured her, setting the suit down.
Her head was down and her eyes were looking away as she stood in front of me. I chuckled, taking a step forward and cupping her face in my hands. I lifted her head and fell deep into her black eyes.
"I'll only be gone for one hour," I told her.
She pursed her lips together and whispered, "Okay,".
I leaned forward, placing a gentle kiss on her forehead for a moment as she held onto my arms. Accepting me. Afterwards, I dressed up for whatever family occasion needed me to be present. And to my surprise, when I left the penthouse a car was already waiting for me right at the front. For who knows how long. The drive there was silent as usual, I stared out of the window unless my phone buzzed and it did like every five minutes.
I sighed the minute I saw the main family house appear from the corner of my eye. I hate it there. Once the car stopped I sat there dreading the thought of getting out of the car let alone walking inside. The last time I was here...was a load of bullshit.
I groaned quietly, stepping out of the car and staring up at the house that represented hell. The crunch of snow beneath my feet was barely enough to keep my attention distracted. As I approached, the door opened automatically as if they knew I was right there and the maid took my coat.
I fixed the buttons of my suit, examining the house as well. It reeks of tension here. I pursed my lips and scrunched my face like I could actually smell all the negativity suffocating this house.
"Kieran," I heard my sister call.
I turned left and saw my sister standing by one of the door frames, holding her hands together and her face noticeably red. I walked to her, taking in all of the emotions displayed on her face. Sadness, confusion, distress, and...maybe frustration.
I hesitantly pulled her into a brief hug causing her to nearly break down again.
"I didn't think you'd actually show," She sniffled, pulling away and wiping her tears away.
"I didn't really have much of a choice," I explained, putting my hands into my pockets.
She gulped, trying to bury more of her cries.
"What a surprise to see you here," I heard a familiar voice say from behind us.
We both turned to focus our attention, walking down the stairs, with her head held high but her eyes low, dressed in her best attire for her special occasion. My mother approached us, looking us up and down thoroughly.
She focused on me before turning away, "Come, this way,".
We waited for a moment until Ava moved first, I followed after the both of them. She took us halfway through the house and into the family room where their beloved Nick waited.
I scoffed, "I thought this was a family affair,".
"Kieran," My mother snapped, "Don't,".
She turned away from me and whispered something to Nick and Ava that I clearly wasn't supposed to be a part of. Even our lawyers were here.
"So," I said, picking up a piece of old silverware, "Did he finally die?".
My mother sighed, "Goddamnit Kieran, can we all have five minutes without your attitude".
It went silent.
I chuckled, "I'm just asking the obvious,".
"Can't you at least show some respect?".
"I am being respectful. You're quite questionable," I locked eyes with her, making sure she felt the fury in my eyes, "Considering all you want is his money right now,".
She clenched down, balling her fists up and her nostrils flared. My mother brushed her hair back and sat down on a couch next to Nick, who appeared to be her new favorite. It didn't surprise me.
"So," I said, turning to Nick, "Did he?".
His eyes flared at my own in such an embarrassing way. He sighed and looked away. Funny, he still can't look me in the eyes properly.
"Not yet,".
"Then?".
"He's gone brain dead, actually," Nick explained, "And has been for the last three days,".
"And?".
"We thought your mother had power of attorney over your father but," he rubbed his face, "It seems, you are the one with the legal authority,".
My eyebrows raised, "Oh?'.
"Yes," He groaned, "And as a family, we've decided to inform you and pull the plug,".
"As a family?" I scoffed.
I looked around the room looking at all of the eyes avoiding my very gaze. I laughed, watching them turn their heads away in shame and guilt. As a family.
"That's funny," I mumbled.
"Excuse me?," My mother hissed.
My head dropped trying to hide the smirk on my face as my body shook from my laughter. I waved my hand out before throwing my head back and smiling at each and every one of them. Look at them. Pieces of shit.
"Whatever game it is you're playing, stop it," my mother snapped.
I slowly turned my attention to her, staring straight into that black soul of hers till she could no longer face me. I stared so intensely into the top of her head until she finally built up enough courage to look me in the eyes and I didn't look away. I stared into her meaningless shit eyes that were never important to me nor beautiful. I watched her nose twitch and her eyes flicker. I had lost any sort of emotion towards my mother years ago, there was no point in her trying to guilt trip me.
"This isn't a fucking family," I stoically said.
It sent a shiver through the room. The tension that was slowly eating everyone alive erupted, making these meaningless people tremble under my presence. It's not like I cared, they never did.
"How could you?" My mother questioned.
"How could I what?" I asked, "Be honest? Because if that isn't the fucking truth then what is?".
"We are your-,"
"You are nothing," I interrupted.
Her eyes watered.
"You have never meant anything to me and never will. You should know this by now, you just don't want to accept the fact because you failed a mother. You're the one who made it this way," I raised a brow, "You have always been insignificant,".
My mother shot upright and charged my way, sending a flying hand right across my face. In the background Ava gasped quietly. I stood there with my head still straight, still looking into my mothers eyes which were filled with raging tears that I could care less about. The silence in the room turned into static, ringing inside of my ears. Unpleasantly.
"You, Kieran," She gasped, "Are an abomination,".
I scoffed, chuckling at her, "I wonder who's fault that is,".
She gulped down her tears and stepped back, finally unable to look at me for any longer. I guess this is where our relationship, finally, ends. I straightened my suit and sighed out, focusing my attention on the lawyers.
"Don't pull the plug," I instructed.
"Excuse me?!" Nick exclaimed, "You cannot do that!".
I rolled my eyes, exhaustingly staring at his annoying face. This bitch.
"I can," I clarified, "And I will,".
"Kieran...," Ava whispered.
I didn't bat an eye towards her. I spun on my heel, making my way towards the doorframe to the the fuck out of here.
"I'll pull the plug when I want. Don't contact me for useless business anymore," I
explained.
I mean it when I say it, I could have died if I was in that house for any longer. I proceeded out, with their calls following after me but I did not care. I never did. There I was, back in the cold air where I could actually breathe, on my way to see Suriah again. Only...I wasn't myself.
I strolled through the lobby of the penthouse complex, watching everyone move slowly past me as if I were dreaming. Strange. Maybe I'm dehydrated. I clicked the private elevator button at the same time my ears began ringing violently. I snapped my head away from the noise, holding onto my ear. What the fuck.
As I walked down the hall, my own two feet walked backwards. My heart was heavy, my chest throbbed crazily, ready to explode. I opened the front door, a wave of heat passing by my face. I fell onto the counter, gripping the edge for support. It's hot. Really hot. I removed my coat, throwing it on the floor and sliding down the wall of the island counter, loosening my tie. Fuck.
"Kieran?" A faded voice called.
It sounds like my mom. I closed my eyes, rolling my head to the side as I panted heavily. It's like I'm back at the old house again. I sighed, yanking at my tie weakly. She would always get me and bring me to my father. I wrapped my hands around the side of my face, blocking it away from the memories. No.
"Kieran?" They called again.
I won't fall for it this time. She won't take me to him.
"Kieran, what's wrong?".
A hand grazed my arm, my eyes instantly shot open and slapped the hand away. He can't get to me this time. I stared into my mother's eyes worriedly watching me.
"What happened, Kieran?".
My breath hitched, "Get away from me,".
"W-what?" She questioned, trying to come closer.
I reached out grabbing her by the shoulder and a fist full of hair, "You impudent wrench,".
"K-kieran you're scaring me..," She whispered, fake tears rolling down her face.
"Shut up," I hissed.
"Kieran....,"
"SHUT UP!" I yelled, slamming her into the floor, repeatedly. I roughly slammed her against the floor and grabbed her by the throat, trying to take away all the pain she'd once given me. Strangling out all the tourture she made me endure. Her eyes reddened and the tears flushed out like an overflowing cup of water. Beneath me her body wiggled just like I once did when I tried to escape. It'll all go away. She'll be gone. It will all go away.
"Kieran...stop...," Suriah suddenly said.
I followed the sound of her voice only to find her beneath me. Wrapped in the chokehold of my hands. My eyes widened and I instantly pulled back until my back hit a wall. What's wrong with you? She coughed out and pushed herself up, trying to catch her breath. Suriah's hair was messy and her neck was stained red. I slowly looked down at my own hands, what did I do...
You're a monster, Kieran.
An abomination.
"Kieran...," Suriah weakly whispered.
She had scooted closer, her hand reaching out towards me. I couldn't bear to have her touch me after what I just did. A monster, they're right, you are a monster. She grabbed my hand.
"Don't," I whispered.
"Kieran," She sturdily faced my head towards her. Holding me within her grasp.
Our eyes met, a rather unbearable experience. I tried to turn away but Suriah kept my face straight. I can't look at her.
"You're okay, you're fine," She whispered.
My heart skipped, sending a sharp pain through my body.
"It okay, everythings fine," She smiled, as if I wasn't fucking choking her two seconds ago.
"Suriah...I-,".
"You nothing," She snapped, scooting closer.
"They're not here," She said, referring to my family, "They can't hurt you, not anymore,".
She pulled me to her chest, my eyes still wide open; searching for a sense of hope from the built up pain torturing my body. I hesitantly lifted my arms and placed them around Suriah. She'll hold me. I closed my eyes and pulled her closer as if my very existence depended on it.
She'll save me.
"It's okay," She shushed, holding me tighter, "Everything'll be alright,".
It'll be okay. We'll be okay. I'll be okay.
And there, it all went away. The memories and all I wished to disappear, vanished by the second the longer I was in her arms.
It's just us, Suriah. Just us.