⚠️Trigger ⚠️ : this chapter contains self helming ! Do Not Read If you are uncomfortable!
________
Jungkook took a long bath. A warm, relaxing, filled with scented candles and rosewater then he unplugged the plug and let all the water drain in.
he wrapped his lower body with the softest towel he could find and walked into his closet. It wasn't too big but neither too small. It's like his legs had their own mind and took him to the corner of the closet then he went weak, making him drop on his knees.
his hands involuntarily dragged a small bag. It was black and there was dust all over it. He wiped it with the towel which was no longer wrapped around his body and then he unzipped it.
It's all there.
His favorite suit dress and his Boots. he took them out with his shaking hands and clutched them dear with his life. his shoulders jerked as he choked on a sob but no tears came.
he wore them. he wanted to wear them.
After all Haein did buy it for a special occasion.
The suit shirt has a huge cut on the abdomen area and a cut on the pants ... and some dried blood stains here and there ...
It was too loose for his fitting and he saw how much weight he had really lost for the first time. he feared that the dress might slip off from his body , Just like his everything slipped in a flash.
he still don't know who brought this dress back from the hospital and placed it in the bag. he had found this on the day he moved here and kept it hidden in here.
his fingers touched the corners of the cut of his stomach and then touched the scar right inside it. he had many creams to remove all the scars from his face arms and legs and those creams did remove it, but he did not want this scar to be removed from his body. It was the reminder and the reason for his baby's loss..
The glasses had scratched his other parts of the body but a huge glass shard had pierced his abdomen and almost touched his baby. It had killed the baby..
The pretty boy walked in front of a mirror and saw himself. he wasn't smiling. There was no shine in his eyes like he had that night. his hands stroked his belly like he did that night except there is no life growing in him...
He waited for the tears which were brimming up in his eyes would fall on his face and burn or pierce but They did nothing...
he closed his eyes and sighed in exhaustion.....
he walked into his study, closed all his files, put them inside their respective drawers and cleared his table. He took out the photos and his ultrasound which have been under his desk for so long and spread them on his table...
Each photo is a special memory and the pretty boy couldn't get more time to make more of it...
He took a long breath.
his hands shook hesitantly as they pulled the drawer and took out the pills Hesitantly? Do it No second thoughts they are waiting for you.. he thought in his mind
Tears were falling on his face but he needed them to hurt him but they didn't do anything. he slammed the box of tablets on the table and started scratching his face.
"WHY AREN'T YOU HURTING ME?!" he screamed, scratching his cheeks. "HURT ME!"
I'll stop them.
Jungkook's eyes snapped open and his head whipped everywhere to find the owner of the voice.
he realized it was a strange voice echoing in his head. he knew that voice but he knew that the person is nowhere here.
"GET OUT!" he screamed again, gripping his hair in frustration. his heart started rummaging in its cage and his throat went dry.
he had his career, his parents, his friends and other people whom he couldn't leave.
Another voice echoed in his head. He is so ready, but he need these voices out of his mind. he need no restrictions and just want his babies in peace.
"GET OUT OF MY HEAD!" he screamed again as the salt water kept streaming down his face. he stumbled back and his back hit the table making those pills fall on the floor.
"Nonononono!" Jungkook panicked and took them in his palms.
Suddenly the door of his study opened and Jimin entered, the dog came running after him. Jimim stopped dead on his track when he met the pretty boy's eye.
"Jungkook!" he gasped in shock. His eyes went to the pretty boy's table and then took in his attire. he took a cautious step.
"N-No! Stop right t-there! Just don't." Jimin stepped back when she saw those handful of pills on the pretty boy's palm.
Jimin raised his arms in surrender and sobbed softly. "k-kooie, look at me. It's g-going to be alright."
Jungkook shook his head vigorously. "N-No. It won't. Im-miss them so much, Jimin. So much." He felt his grip around the pills tighten, crushing them.
"I know, I know."Jimin breathed out. "It's okay Jungkook. Just walk towards me, please."
"It hurts so much." The pretty boy sobbed. "i-i can't i-take it anymore."
"Kookie, please just listen to me." Jimin took another step ahead. ''Throw those pills and talk to me, please bub ." he said desperately.
"No! It's too late. !" the pretty boy's palms opened and he closed his eyes as his arms raised and opened his mouth to take them.
I want to know you...
I'll make you alive..
Jungkook's palms trembled as they tilted and the pills were slowly falling from it but something happened.
They didn't fall night into his mouth. They fell on the floor..
He could hear jimin's footsteps getting closer and closer to him, the pills landing on the floor, crushing...
Jimin ran towards him and engulfed him in a tight hug.
"Y-You dumb bitch! Little piece of shit! You don't d-do things like that."" Jimin held the pretty boy tighter and sobbed "D-Don't scare me like that!"
Jungkook's legs went weak and kneeled, sobbing and clutching Jimin's shirt. "j-jimin...I w-wanted to... c-c-couldn't..."
"Shh! It's okay. It's okay" Jimin cooed running his fingers on his scalp.
"Ji-jimin" he sniffed and saw his tears ruining Jimin's black shirt. "j-jimin i-t's h-hurting." he hiccupped.
Jimin kept whispering soothing words in the pretty boy's ears as he kept mumbling words. that nobody could understand.
Jungkook couldn't do it. he was so close and yet so far. All this time he was ready, but when the time finally came, his heart took it's first action in years.
_________
The pretty boy spent the next day in his room, staring at space. he knows that his parents know what he did or at least tried to do again last night. he had even seen them coming into his room, saying some words, his mother shedding some tears and his father having a strange glint in his eyes as he spoke to him but he couldn't hear anything.
It's like his ears had pressed a mute button to the world or maybe it was a mute button for people only. he could hear a bird chirping outside his window and that dog's continuously barking at the bird. It was still early afternoon.
What am I doing here? I have to work.
With that thought in his mind, he got up from his bed, he showered and got dressed. When he got out of his room, it was silent. Like there was something suddenly gone missing from the surroundings.
he simply shrugged himself and got out of the house avoiding the very surprised gazes of his parents and Jimin in the living room. Sending a quick message to Jimin that he can take a leave if he wants, the pretty boy covered his face with sunglasses and walked out of the gate, giving a side glance at the dog house.
That dog was sleeping very peacefully.
Oh. That explains the strange silence, but this is an odd time for that dog to sleep. As far as he remember, that dog never sleeps at this time.
Whatever. he never cared about that much.
he switched off his phone as he got into his office and got ready for an unexpected meeting with one of his many clients.
There was no Jimn. Maybe he decided to take a leave.
______
he continued working till it was time to leave. When he got off the bus, there was this strange aura around his house. It wasn't the same old one which he had always been there for years but it was more than that.
When he opened his main door, he heard a wail of cry, he dropped his bag on the couch and followed the source of this sound then stopped in his tracks.
Jimin was on the floor, clutching a toy close to his chest and kept crying. his parents were simply watching him with sympathy.
"What's going on?" Jungkook asked.
"Oh honey, you're here!" his mother exclaimed. "Take care of your friend, will you? he has been crying since afternoon."
"Why?" he asked as he took a few more steps ahead in Jimin's direction then! He saw it.
Jungkook, that dog, lying on the floor and still sleeping.
The pretty boy placed his hand on Jimin's shoulder which made him jerk in contact. he saw jimin was devastated and broken. His shiny black eyes were now red and his blonde hair was in a frizzled mess.
"Jimin, what happened?"
Jimin sniffed. "Jungkook, s-she's gone. Jungkook died i-in her s-sleep."
It felt weird to hear that but the truth was that dog died. in sleep.
"How?" Jungkook asked him .
"Y-Your p-pilis on the floor."
Now the pretty boy understand everything... he wouldn't lie but he felt somehow bad.. bad for that dog... though he never liked that dog but still seeing his friend's teary eyes.. he felt a sting in his heart..
"Bury her tomorrow morning, pack her stuff then meet me in my study in the afternoon." Jungkook said whispering low
"Y-You won't be coming?" Jimin asked him in surprise.
"No. I'll be in my study, waiting for you."
Jimin's face breaks into a sweet smile. "That's the sweetest thing you have ever said to me."
Jungkook blinked in response. "I'll be in my room." With that he got up and went inside his room..
.
.
.
.
.
A/N: thanks for voting ...❤️