Today is the day the project is due. I wake up and smell my brother's hoodie again to make sure his scent is still there. It is.
I slip the hoodie off and put on an oversized Mötley Crüe T-shirt, so if anything goes sideways today, I will have my brother with me. I put on grey baggy ripped jeans and slide on my converse. Today, I grab his walkman and his tape and bring them downstairs with me.
"Good morning-" my mother starts.
I am confused why she stopped talking suddenly, but then I realize she is staring at my brother's walkman.
"Where did you get that?" she asks.
My heart drops as I realize that I kept the box hidden from her in the back of my closet. She has spent a long time looking for some of his things.
"I've had it for a while. I'm missing him a little extra today," I say.
"You hid it from me?" she questions.
"I'm sorry. I've hidden a few things of his," I admit.
She sighs and walks over to me. I'm expecting a lecture of some kind, but instead of argumentative words she just pulls me into a hug.
"It's okay. I know how much he meant to you. You don't have to tell me what you've kept. They're yours now," she assures.
I nod, and I relax in her embrace. After a while, I pull away, and she brings me a bowl of cereal. She calls Mateo down, and she makes him a bagel. The older Mateo gets, the more he looks like Mason. My mother makes herself coffee and takes a seat next to me.
"What's got you missing him so much today?" she asks.
"I'm forgetting his voice. I remember his laugh as clear as day but his voice. I'm just afraid the longer he is gone, the more it'll feel like he never existed," I admit.
"You remember his laugh because it's one of the things you admired the most about him. I wasn't a good mother at the time but no matter what you both were going through you always were together. You guys were inseparable," she smiles.
I laugh to myself. She's right about that. He brought me everywhere.
"Yeah, I just wish I could hear it again. I still remember how much we would laugh in his car. Sometimes we would just drive and talk," I say.
My mom rubs my back, and I smile.
"You loved his car," she says.
"I did. His Mustang was nice," I state.
She smiles and offers to give me a ride to school. I agree, and I grab my backpack.
___
Steve and I walk in together, and we stop at his locker so he can get his things.
"It'll get easier, you know," Steve states.
"What?" I question.
Is he talking about my brother? How does he know?
"The whole living with the Upside Down thing," he says.
"Oh, yeah. Surprisingly, it hasn't really bothered me," I respond.
"Really?" he questions.
"Yeah," I say.
He shrugs his shoulder, and we continue to make small talk until I get to homeroom. I wave goodbye and take my seat next to Robin.
"Hey," she says.
"Hey! How are you?" I ask.
"Good," she says.
"No, you're not," I blurt.
"What?" she questions.
"I can tell you're not okay. What's wrong?" I ask.
After a while, she sighs and comes closer to me.
"Tammy keeps staring at Steve. Why won't she look at me?" she whispers.
"Oh, Robin."
I open my arms for a hug, and she hugs me tightly. As she pulls away, she looks behind me, and her eyes widen.
"What?" I ask.
"Don't turn around. Let's just...talk!" she begins.
I roll my eyes and begin to look behind me, but she quickly pulls me back.
"Robin, what's wrong?" I ask.
"Billy is like totally giving you the death stare. He walked in all happy, and then he, like totally got mad when he saw you," she whispers.
"Oh," I sigh.
___
"Okay, class! As you know, today is the due date for the project! To receive extra credit, you would have to write an essay on your topic. If not, all you had to do was make a small posterboard with facts and pictures and your thoughts on different events," Mr. Brown states.
I can feel the anger radiating off of Billy. We are definitely over. He's never going to forgive me.
"Okay, I'm coming around to collect your projects," Mr.Brown says.
He starts slowly walking around and grabbing people's projects. I decide to not take ours out yet to see what Billy will say to Mr. Brown. After a while, Mr. Brown makes it to Billy's desk and waits for him to take out his project.
"Where's your project, Mr.Hargrove?" Mr. Brown asks.
"I didn't finish it, sir," Billy replies.
"Why not? You had three weeks," he questions.
"Just ran into some problems," Billy says.
"Well, I must say, I'm disappointed in you, Mr. Hargrove. You'd think you'd want to make a good first impression for class," Mr. Brown says.
I already know Billy is mad that Mr. Brown made that comment. I decide to take out the project and the essay.
"Here, Mr. Brown. I finished Billy and I's project last night along with the essay. We were just messing with you," I smile.
"Ah! Aren't you both full of surprises? And you did the essay! You're the first student I've come across this period that has done it. Well done you two," Mr. Brown says as he grabs the project and essay from my hand.
"Thank you," Billy and I say.
I grab a piece of paper from my backpack and grab a few pencils from my pencil case. I begin to sketch a lake surrounded by trees. Like the one, my brother and I used to go to. It was always fun going there with him because he was very unpredictable. He threw me in a couple of times, and sometimes he would climb the highest tree and stay up there the whole time.
Somebody walks runs by my desk, and the drawing falls on the floor. I sigh and reach down to grab it but stop realizing it landed on Billy's shoe. I continue to reach down when Billy grabs it before I can and examines it. I stare at him and try to gain the confidence to say something.
"C- can you give me that back? It's important," I ask.
He sighs and stares at me dead in the eye while crumbling the paper. I click my tongue and sigh. As I begin to pull away from him and grab my arm.
"Don't try to make me look stupid ever again," he hisses.
"I wasn't trying to make you look stupid, dipshit," I snap back.
I yank my arm away from him and flip him off. He raises his eyebrows, and I feel a wave of fear wash over me. The look on his face is angry and in disbelief. I'm going to have to run out of here if I want to escape him.
I look down at my Mötley Crüe shirt and take a deep breath.
___
I eye the clock, and as soon as the bell rings, I pick up my backpack and speed walk out of the classroom. As I'm walking toward the exit, Steve walks up beside me.
"Hey, L/N," he says.
"Hi, Stevey," I reply.
"You talk to Billy?"
"No. I think we're over. Billy doesn't... want me anymore," I sigh.
"Well, I think he's missing out on a great person."
"Maybe."
He holds the door open for me, and we walk into the parking lot.
"No, not maybe. He is. Billy is just too blind to see that."
I smile, and he hugs me. I see my mom pull in, and I pull back from Steve's hug.
"My mother is here. I'll see you tomorrow, Steve," I say.
"Well, you want to hang out tonight? I can come to your house if you want?" he asks.
"Sounds fun. I'll see you tonight," I respond.
He smiles, and I hop in my mother's car. I look back and see Steve get into his car, his smile never fading. I turn back around, and my eyes land on Billy leaning against some girl's car. She is twirling her hair around her finger, and Billy looks her up and down. We truly are over.
His eyes meet mine and he smirks at me. I sink lower into the seat and pretend I didn't see it.
"You guys broke up?" My mother asks.
"We got into a fight, and haven't talked in a few days. We never officially broke up, but I guess he's already moved on since he's flirting with other women," I sigh.
"Oh, Y/N. It's going to be alright. I have something at home that'll cheer you up."
"What is it?"
"You'll see," she smiles.
My mom puts the car in drive, and we begin to drive out of the parking lot when I see Max skate into it. Max smiles at me and mouthes the words, "I'll call you later."
___
My mother and I picked up Mateo, and we're making our way back home. As we get closer to my house I see a car in front of it. Its... my brother's car!
"Holy shit!" I beam.
"Hey! Language around your brother," My mother laughs.
My mom parks in the driveway and I sprint to Mason's car.
"Where did you get his car? It still has his things in it!" I gush.
I look around and see his dice are still hanging from his rearview mirror, and his stickers are still on the roof of the car.
He has The Beatles sticker, Black Sabbath, Mötley Crüe, Iron Maiden, AC/DC, Judas Preist, Led Zeppelin, Aerosmith, Ozzy Osborn, David Bowie, Queen, Kiss, and much more.
Memories come flooding back of us in the car. We've laughed, cried, yelled, and sang in this car. My brother had different energy when we got into the car. He was always so energetic.
I got my driver's license two weeks after my 16th birthday. My mother wasn't so great at the time, so she never let me drive her car.
"I've hiding things too, I suppose. It was wrong of me to keep it from you. Only you could keep the energy of this car alive, so I'm giving it to you. It's what he would've wanted anyways," she replies.
"Wow, thank you," I say.
"Don't thank me, thank your brother."
"No, thank you. We both know my brother would kill me if I touched his car without his permission," I laugh.
I get out and take a moment to look at it. It's dark blue with two white stripes stretching from the front to the back. He has a Ford Mustang II. I can't help but smile at it.
"Alright, I'm going inside to make dinner. Feel free to drive it around," she says.
I nod my head, and Mateo walks inside with her. I hear Billy's Camaro from down the street, and it gets closer and closer, and I start to feel anxious. I decide to pretend like I don't notice and continue to admire the car. Billy's Camaro slows and pulls into their driveway.
"Holy shit Y/N! Is that your car?" Max asks from across the street.
I smile at her.
"Yeah!"
_______________
HERE THE CAR:
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EDITED: August 22nd, 2022
I hope yall enjoyed this chapter! It was sweet! Is this chapter lowkey based on my brother? Yes! Anyway, take care of yourself and know that I'm proud of you! Love ya! -C