Terrible Things
I was glad the bell rang…it was lunchtime, and I was already tired of the eyes staring at my bruises. I gathered my books, and walked down the hall. There stood Billings, looking to me. “What is up, Hollister? I see you have bruises to match mine. We are brethren now,”
I hung my head, for a minute, then looked up to Billings. “Rory, I’m sorry I lashed out at you like that. I shouldn’t have. I was worried about some personal business, and I shouldn’t have taken it out on you. I’m not apologizing so that you won’t pursue your actions against me…you have every right to do so,”
Billings looked at me, as if I were trying to deceive him. He then noticed that my look was that of sincerity. “Fuck it. I’m done with Capers and Thommerson anyway,”
Billings walked away. I walked to my quarters, putting away my books. Capers looked at me. “What the hell? Did Billings do that to you? I’m on him, esse!”
“No Billings didn’t do this,” I said. “Let it go, Capers. I am not in the mood…can we talk about something else besides my face?”
“Like what?”
“Like did you and Sydnee go out this past weekend?” I asked. Capers got up from his bed. “Come to lunch with me, and you’ll find out,”
I gave Capers a keen look through slimmered eyes. It was obvious, that it was a ploy to get me to eat with them at lunch, which was something I wasn’t feelin. But if I didn’t eat lunch, I would be perusing the snack machines in the Rec Lounge between classes until dinner. I sighed, rolling my eyes. “Fine…let’s do this,”
I looked in the mirror. I still had the stitches above my brow, where my head was busted open by Dre and his other homeboy, I had a bruise on my left cheek, my split lip was healing quite nicely, but I also had a bruise on my lower right, near my jaw line…my ribs were also still sore, but not as bad as they felt on Monday. I sighed in dismay…my face looked like I was the victim of some back alley street thug who went by the moniker of “Bumpy Knuckles”. I looked to Capers, who was standing there waiting. He raised his arms.
I reluctantly followed him to the Mess Hall…while grabbing my lunch, I could feel eyes staring at me. It bothered me a little, but there was no turning back because I was here. Capers and I sat at the table with Franchesca and Sydnee.
“What happened to you?” asked Franchesca.
“I was building a treehouse, and the whole thing fell out of this really high tree,” I lied.
“You need to be careful. Trees don’t like you,” she said, as we all laughed. Sydnee smiled. “Welcome back, Mitchell…how is that sister of yours?”
“She’s doin okay,” I said, in a flash of positivity. “She has a fractured rib, but she’s becoming herself again…no- she’s better than herself. She split up with Riley, and she’s now talking with Dupree,”
Sydnee’s mouth dropped open. “WHA-?! Dupree Dupree? Weed smoking Dupree? She’s talking with him?”
“SHHHHH!” we all hissed.
“Sydnee, you of all people should know, Dupree has had a crush on Meridian since high school…and she liked him, just as much- they were just too chicken shit to admit how they felt about each other, until now,” I explained.
“Damn! Everybody hooking up- my girl Syd and Dom, you got a girl, Mitchell…I need to get me a guy,” said Franchesca. Sydnee looked at her. “Stop it Fran…you are a player,”
“So…players need someone too,” said Franchesca. We laughed again. I looked at Billings, sitting with Karin Carmichael. “What’s goin on with Billings? Dude had me dead to rights today, and passed up an opportunity to get under my skin, like he usually does,”
“Thorsen got me and Dom’s statements, and based off that, they stripped Billings of his lead position,” said Sydnee. “Oh yeah…Thorsen also told me to tell you that while you are still on probationary discipline, he will grant you your weekend leave,”
“Wow,” I said. “Thorsen’s not a bad guy after all,”
“Thorsen just knows who is putting in work and paying their dues. If you are straight with him, then he is straight with you,” said Franchesca. “You have way more potential than Billings, Mitch…it’s just that Billings pulled a few strings and kissed some ass to get that position. And now that he has been stripped of it, he knows he has to make things right with his fellow Plebes again,”
“Well at least he’s got enough sense to keep Carmichael in his corner,” said Capers.
“Man I can’t wait until this year is over- that is gonna open up a whole weekend for us! No more of this Saturday & Sunday crap,” said Sydnee.
“YEAH!” we all cheered, toasting to the next year. Some of the others looked to us…I wasn’t even conscientious about my bruises anymore, as I smiled, taking a sip of my cranberry juice. I then looked to Sydnee. “You and Dom go out this past weekend?”
“Yeah,” she answered. “Dom took me to a real nice little Mexican restaurant…the food was good, and we had a live Mariachi band play a tune for us…it was sweet,”
“My man!” I laughed, patting Capers on his back. “I’m glad you two had a great time. Maybe down the road we can double date,”- at that thought, my smile lessened, as I thought about my situation…but I played it off, just to get through lunch, as well as the rest of my classes…
The end of the day.
I walked to my quarters, and sat down at my desk. The next day was Friday, and I was going on weekend break…but no one to go home to. Meridian was going to be spending the weekend most likely with Dupree, and I was going to be at home alone. I hadn’t spoken with Jassandra all week. I knew she was angry with me, and I knew she needed space and time to think about things. Mother had told me that the hearing had been pushed to Wednesday, and I hadn’t even gotten a call from her concerning that. I looked at her picture on my cell phone…her beautiful cheekbones, her wonderful smile, her alluring, coffee colored eyes. I missed kissing her soft, chocolate shoulders…I missed wrapping my arms around her smallish waist and her thunderous, stallion-like thighs, as she would sometimes sit in my lap. I missed the joy and affection that I used to receive from Jassandra Mills. I jumped, startled out of my thoughts, as my phone rang. “Hello?”
“Hey son,”
“Hey Dad,” I said.
“How are you feeling?”
“Okay…I guess,” I said.
“You don’t sound okay…what’s on your mind?”
“Jassandra,” I answered. “I just hadn’t spoken with her since Monday…she didn’t even call to let me know how the hearing went yesterday. It’s driving me nuts, not talking to her,”
“I understand, son…but you also have to look at the whole big picture- you two are treading in unsafe waters, when you dive into the whole aspect of interracial relationships. Some people are built to deal with it, while some people aren’t…not to say that Jassandra isn’t, because she is a very strong young lady. Add to the scenario, your ‘indiscretions’ with Pennel Phelps, and Jassandra is most likely feeling quite betrayed right now. She knows how much she cares for you, but she is questioning herself in light of all the other things going on around her with the hearings, and such, does she need more drama in the mix?”
I let out a rebellious gasp of dejection, at the callousness of Dad’s words. I really couldn’t argue, because in a way, he was right. I didn’t make Jassandra’s life easier…
“I know you are feeling a little scorned with what I’ve just said, but there is no nice way to exactly put it, Mitchell. I know you love her…just like I know she really loves you. But this whole situation isn’t something we can all put in the back of our minds. When she’s defending you to another black man or female who has questioned her ethnicity, she’s also going to be wondering in the back of her mind, are you really worth it?”
My chest sunk in, as my heart started to feel heavy. My stomach started to feel a little queasy, as I propped my pillows against the wall and lay on my bed. I had just gotten her- I couldn’t bear the thought of losing Jassandra.
“What do I do? I don’t know if I’m built for this Dad. I’m trying to stay cool…I have a couple weeks left until the completion ceremony,” I breathed.
“Stay frosty, Mitchell. It will work itself out. But if she does give you the chance to make it up to her, you better make good on your promise,” said Dad.
“Sure Dad,” I said. “You have a good evening, sir…bye,”
I hung up and laid back, thinking about Jassandra again. I figured that Capers and Sydnee were off somewhere enjoying each others’ company, and here I was, in my room with no one to call, and making up work that I had missed out on for the past 3 days. I stripped to my tee and boxers, and decided to call it a night early.
Friday.
The weekend was finally upon us, as I had finished my last class for the day. I went to the gym, and started working out, jumping rope, hitting the body bag, and few sparring sessions with Capers. It seems his boxing skills were very good, as he would stop in mid spar, and correct me on my mistakes…we stepped out of the ring, and went to shower.
“Thanks for the tips,” I said.
“No problem,” said Capers. “What are you doin for this weekend? Spendin it with that girl of yours?”
“Not this weekend,” I said.
“Why not? Usually, you sound like you can’t wait to get out of here,” said Capers. “Somethin happened?”
“Something like that,” I breathed. “We’re kind of givin each other some room to breathe,”
“Hang in there,” gasped Capers, as he stepped into the shower. “It’ll be all good,”
We walked back to our quarters, when another Plebe, Josh Garrison, ran to me, panting heavily. “Hollister! There is someone here to see you- hottie, in a big limo,”
Capers and I looked to each other, without the slightest clue. Josh propped himself up, with his hands on his legs, while trying to suck in air. “She is in the Diligence Hall,”
I gave Capers my bag. “Take it to the room. Thanks, Josh,”- I started to make my way to the main administrations building where the hall was. Once again, I started to get this weird and sickening sensation in my gut, as I got closer to the hall…the doors were closed. I stood outside, debating whether I should go inside, or turn around, and leave.
I closed my eyes, taking in a deep breath. I exhaled, then opened the door, my eyes widening, as my mouth dropped open. To what, did I do to deserve this?
Pennel Phelps.
She sat in a chair, with about three cock-diesel, goonish looking bodyguards around her, all dressed in black suits. Her hair was vibrant, even though it was still cut short, and dark brunette…her green eyes, had a serene, but anticipating look to them. Her lips were glossy and beautiful, but she did not sport a smile, nor a frown…she didn’t even wear the devilish mask that she revealed to me the previous weekend. Her face was that of tabula raza- a blank state. Although she sat in her chair with the pristine and elegance of that of a princess- her legs crossed and her hands resting on top of her legs, she did not look dressed the part. Pennel had on a big grey sweatshirt, a pair of dark jeans that fit the contour of her nice sexy legs, and a pair of K-Swiss plain leather shoes…for the “girl next door” look, it was very sexy.
“You got some nerve,” I grunted. I turned and started to leave…
“Mitchell…please,” she spoke. I stopped in my tracks. Her tone was that of pleading concern. I looked over my shoulder to her. Damn me, for still having that place in my heart for Pennel…she lowered her head. “Please,”
I let out a droning sigh…was I gluttons for punishment? Why did I continue time and time again, to put myself in situations, concerning her? I turned around and walked to her. I sat in the seat, forty-five degrees from her. Pennel looked to her bodyguards. “You can leave now…I’ll be fine,”
“Are you sure, Miss Phelps?”
“Yes. I’m quite sure…Mr. Hollister is a gentleman,” she said. “He would never hit a lady,”- I then noticed, she had a slight bruise on the left side of her face. I knew it had to be Dre’s handiwork…
The bodyguards left the room, closing the door. My teeth gritted, as I had to use every ounce of energy in my body to not strangle the fuck out of this girl. How dare she come here unannounced, after having me beaten nearly to a pulp the previous weekend…after having my sister- her “supposed” best friend, beaten and drugged…my hands palmed the chair tightly.
Pennel looked to my hands, then to my face. She turned her head away. “You hate me…I disgust you. I understand how you feel,”
“Meridian believed in you. She trusted you, and you backstabbed her, and stepped on her friendship at the same time. You DRUGGED MY SISTER AND HAD HER BEATEN!” I erupted. “And now you stand here in front of my face- why? Where’s your boyfriend Dre at?”
“Dre was a mistake,” answered Pennel, bringing her hand to her face, the area where I seen the slight bruise, covered by make up. She was blinking her eyes rapidly, but the tears were starting to fall…her lips shook with fear and anticipation again. “Mitchell…I need you,”
My face contorted, with disgust and apathy, upon hearing the words that seeped from her lips. “You gotta be fucking kidding me- are you fucking serious?!”
Her lips primped up, at hearing my tone. I rose from my chair. “I am so out of here. Have a good life, Pennel Phelps,”
“Mitchell, I think I’m pregnant!”
I froze, at the moment of her announcement. My stomach began to twist even more, as I looked to her. “You LIAR! You will say and do about anything, to keep me in your grasp!”
“No Mitchell, I’m not lying this time”-
“LEAVE ME ALONE! I DON’T LOVE YOU!” I yelled, as Pennel kept babbling, trying to plead her case. She came out of the chair grabbing my arm, screaming, “Mitchell, PLEASE!”
I looked to her, as she collapsed in my arms, like the night of the fundraiser, when I held her as her body shook, while she whimpered. “I’m sorry…I’ve done terrible things, that no one should ever forgive me of…I know I don’t deserve you. But you and Dre were the only two that I have slept with in the past few months,”
“And why do you think you are pregnant?”
“My period, hasn’t came on…and before you ask- yes, Dre had on a condom. And I didn’t start sleeping with him until a week before the gala,” she cried, softly. “When I told him, he hit me…I hadn’t spoken with him since,”
“Bullshit! This was your plan all along, Pennel- to tell me that you were pregnant, so that there would be no chance or hope that Jassandra and I would be together!” I hissed. “You know, you almost had me feeling sorry for you,”
She looked to me with crazed look of awe in her eyes. “What in the hell? You honestly THINK, I would come up with a-a pregnancy scheme, to make you stay with me?!”
She pushed away from me. “Forget I ever tried to be civil with you, or reason with you! I know- you don’t love me…I hate you too! But I thought you should know!”- she walked to the table, grabbing her purse…some of the contents spilled onto the floor. “Why did I even bother?”
Pennel kneeled, picking up her stuff…she then stopped, and sat on the floor, crying again. I stood there looking at her…she wiped her eyes, then slowly rose from the floor. I took her hand, helping her up the rest of the way. “What do you want from me, Pennel?”
“Nothing. Like I said, I thought you should know. I’m going to have a test done to determine whether I may actually be pregnant…then, I guess I may be getting an abortion,” she said, looking down to the floor.
“When are you having the tests done?”
“Monday,” said Pennel. “I just got in from Hilton Head today. No more drugs for me…at least until I’m sure,”
“How about no more drugs ever?” I suggested.
“If I didn’t know better, I’d say that you still care about me,” said Pennel, with a half assed smile. Her cheeks were red. I wiped at her tear trails, as she looked to me. All the feelings started to flow back into my mind, that I thought I’d long purged…I still thought Pennel was beautiful, but I also wrestled with the fact of the abhorrent acts that she had done to me and my family. As much as I wanted to believe she was lying just to get me back, what if there was a possibility that she really was pregnant? I would be no better than Dre, abandoning her in her hour of need.
“I don’t understand. I wore a condom too,” I said. Pennel shrugged. “Maybe it broke open, I don’t know- I don’t have a penis,”
“Pennel,”- I put my arms around her, as she looked down to them, then over her shoulder to me. “Do you think you can do it? You know…have an abortion, if you are pregnant?”
“It’s not your concern. I have to live with this. I have a life to live. I want to become a famous surgeon. I can’t do that with a child,” conjectured Pennel. She parted my hands, and stepped outside my hold on her. “Besides, would you rather the child be a fatherless bastard, as seeing how you utterly hate my guts?”
I let that defiant gasp escape again. Pennel stood there, not looking back. “We both are full of emotions right now. I can’t promise or guarantee anything. While I have always loved you, I hate you, for the way you have done and treated me, Mitchell…but if I am indeed pregnant, and if this is a gestation we both are willing to forego, I will try to forgive you for the sake of the child,”
“You had my sister beaten and drugged, and you had Dre’s goons to jump me and my friends when I came to retrieve my sister…I’m not sure whether I can forgive you either,” I uttered. “But I will try to be supportive, whatever the outcome is,”
We stood there, she looking away from me, and I, looking at her soul. It was ugly, murky, and dark…like a bubbling pool of black ooze, with spheres of light swimming through them. I’m assuming that the spheres represented some of the genuine feelings that Pennel has had along her lifeline…
She turned around, at the same time, I started pacing toward her. I haven’t the slightest clue why, but there we were, kissing- our tongues wrestling with each other, while I embraced her in my arms. Moans escaped her mouth, as Pennel temporarily surrendered her emotions to me…her kisses were as luscious as the night that we had kissed in the hotel room. My hands roamed under her sweatshirt, and cupped her petite waistline. Her skin was soft, and she smelled extravagant…we stopped kissing, staring at each others eyes, in amazement of our actions. Pennel looked down at my chest. “Um…I can’t…I mean, we shouldn’t,”
I looked into the remaining flickers of innocence, in Pennel’s green eyes. She cautioned so, because she wanted to spare what lingering feelings she had left for me. I knew, because I equally felt the same way. Pennel bowed her head into my chest, sighing. “Why does it have to be this way?”
Pennel walked away from my arms once again, while I stood there. “I will let you know the results, as soon as they come in…and what I plan to do,”
I nodded. Pennel gave a wry smile. “Good bye, Mitchell. Thank you, for hearing me out…believe me, I don’t like this situation anymore than you do,”
She left the room, once again leaving my life in an upheaval, and ruin. I sat in the chair, dragging my hands down my face as I exhaled a sigh of complete and utter despair. If Jassandra found out that Pennel was probably pregnant with the possibility of the child being mine, it was curtains. But I couldn’t keep omitting known truths and lying to her- if it were meant to be for us to stay together, then it would happen. If not, then I would have to accept it, and move on.
I stood, and left the hall, heading back to my quarters. Of course when I got there, Capers was gone, and my bag was sitting on my bed. I figured he had went to the Rec Lounge, to watch movies with Sydnee…I put my bag onto the floor, and once again, shed my uniform. I put my iPod into my ears, and listened to the song Terrible Things by April Smith.
This weekend, was going to be a test of wills…to see if Jassandra and I were going to survive. I had to mentally prepare myself, for what was about to unfold.