I stumbled around the shore like a drunken sailor, my arms limply swinging against my side and occasionally slapping my weakened and sore legs. The freezing cold temperature that the storm left had numbed the pain that pulsated throughout every corner of my body but I still limped nonetheless. It was so cold that my drenched clothing had developed a thin layer of frost and my hair felt heavy from the frozen droplets that rested there. The forest that surrounded me on all sides seemed mournful from the grey skies and black lake water that flowed gently now that the worst of the storm had passed. Everywhere I looked, I couldn't help but think of ghosts crying and wailing over their own deaths and not knowing how to escape.
Each step that I took felt as if I were fighting my own joints that were turning to stone. Only the pain of walking on my beaten, bruised limbs kept me from completely stopping and falling back to sleep, never to wake up again.
Just then, a strange shimmering in the grey, foggy treeline caught my eye; a faint, dull sparkle that I almost mistook for an actual ghost or fairy that was starting to play with my exhausted mind. I turned my stiff neck to look at the shimmering and mindlessly wandered over to see what it was. It glimmered and reflected what little light poked through the clouds and drew me in like any other shiny trinket does to a crow or a raven.
The blood that was splattered across the metal shard barely phased me. As did the body that lay beneath it. Not a single emotion could be found as I stared blankly at the grizzly scene. The body was of a large black bird and it should've clicked with me right then and there but it didn't. I was too tired and cold to be thinking.
I wanted to react in any way but all I could muster was a feeble, "Will...?"
The detached head was staring up at me with a look of horror in its eyes, staring at me in fear as if I, personally, was the one who decapitated him. Still... I couldn't react. I was numb to the pain and didn't have the strength to grieve. I stood there, frozen and staring into the bird's dead eyes, slowly convincing myself that it wasn't Will at all and that it was just some bird who looked remarkably similar. I couldn't have been able to recognise him dead anyway because I didn't know what he looked like dead.
My feet felt glued to the ground and I couldn't move no matter how much I wanted to stop staring at the grizzly body. I was almost half-expecting it to jump up and be perfectly fine and I was getting my own hopes up by imagining it happening, only to be knocked out of my thoughts by nothing in particular and focusing on the dead body again... and the process repeats.
I was so deep inside my own imagination that I never felt the tears leave my eyelids. I stood there, unblinking with hot tears slowly seeping down my cheeks like a statue in a graveyard. I stood there so long that I lost track of time. The cold grey morning slowly grew warmer and the sun revealed its face through the thick grey clouds and transformed the mournful black forest into a mystical fantasy world. It was as if the world was getting over the tragedy without me.
It seemed like a whole new day by the time I found the strength to move my legs. Or maybe my legs just grew impatient with me and moved away without my permission. I was suddenly on autopilot as I slowly hobbled away from the scene and kept on walking down the shore of the lake.
I don't know where my mind was at while I walked. I don't remember. But whatever it was, it occupied my mind so strongly that hours felt like mere minutes and I forgot about my painful injuries until they became too painful to ignore. I just resorted to flying to give my legs a break but it wasn't any sort of relief for my sore arms.
The trees melted away into a vast, rolling sea of green and brown that went on for miles in all directions. The beauty alone was enough to keep me from my thoughts for just long enough to breathe. There was no break from the mountains in any direction and down below where all the ranges joined together was one small flat plain. It was a small town and in my current state of mind, I made a mental note of it.
I flew until I discovered an abandoned complex of buildings and I flew down to the largest of the bunch with the hopes of shelter. The place seemed to be in the middle of some cleaning, so I didn't expect to stay here very long. However, it was a shelter and that's all that mattered to me. I settled in the rafters of the large front entrance and I remained there to sleep and warm up from the lingering chill that still clung to my clothes.
Mortemville, Montana 1979 October 21st
Honestly, the first time I heard the name of the city down the mountain, I nearly decided to avoid it like the plague. I had to keep my composure while talking to a passer-by, who was kind enough to stop and tell me where I was. That was about a month ago and I'm still mildly disturbed by the answer he gave.
Mortemville, Montana... he said it so happily too as if the word "Mortemville" wasn't any way out of the ordinary. He wasn't the only one to have an eerily upbeat attitude either. I didn't talk to many people on my visit to the town but most of the people I encountered did talk to me. It was very weird having complete strangers wish me a good day or ask how I was doing. It was part of the reason why I didn't go back since then; everything just seems so... fake.
I'm also still annoyed at having to leave the asylum. Yes, the old building I took shelter in turned out to be an old asylum; Rosewood is what it's called. I had to leave because out of the blue, this organisation showed up to clean and throw out the old hospital equipment. I had no idea why they were cleaning so vigorously; I thought it was pointless considering the place was ancient and being swallowed by the forest. I guessed maybe the city decided to fix it up for historical purposes, which would make sense, but I was confused why it even mattered. The place seemed forgotten anyway.
However, thankfully for me, I finally figured it out today and the answer is absolutely not what I expected. Maybe there's more to what I'm seeing but I swear to God, there's a family moving into the asylum to live there.
I'm not joking. I wish I was. The idiocy that these people have to think that an abandoned hospital is more suitable to live in than an actual house! I'm actually baffled. Again, maybe there's another reason that I just don't know. Maybe they actually have a very valid reason to be there; like maybe they're renovating it to be apartments or a resort. But until I figure out what that reason is, they've become my source of laughable entertainment.
On the bright side, though. The new questionable owners have a daughter who seems to not want to associate with her parents. From my spot in the trees, I watched the scrawny girl keep her back turned to her parents while she gazed out at the scenery. I couldn't tell if she was upset by the new choice in living space or if she was just deeply lost in thought. She had her arms crossed over her chest but her expression was lifeless and dull.
She was smaller in frame than most girls I've seen that were around my age. I'm assuming she was my age but there was no way of telling. Her hair practically sparkled in the sunlight like pale gold and her clothes were baggy and dark in colour, which made her hair and complexion stand out even more. I couldn't see her face very well from the distance I was at, but I think she has a piercing on or around her mouth.
Naturally, I was curious about the new idiots who moved in. So, after they were done talking to the cleaning crew that had invaded the place previously and went inside to explore what they had to work with, I flew closer and tried to watch them through the windows. This ended up being pointless since most of the windows peered into rooms or were blocked off by wood anyway so I couldn't see them inside.
I decided to, instead, linger around the building to spend my day and wait for something to occur. Maybe I would sneak in at night to snoop through their things.
However, not even thirty minutes after I made this decision, I noticed the young girl come outside with a few gardening tools. I quickly found a good spot in a tree to watch her and the girl casually wandered around the grass with no path in particular. The girl was odd, in my honest opinion. After a while of wandering aimlessly, she picked up a rake and started swinging it around like it were a sword or a spear. She made odd yelling sounds like she was in a battle with something only she could see. It was very odd to witness but she appeared to be having fun in her own little world, so I was trying not to judge her too harshly.
In between her playing around and venturing into worlds only she was a part of, she would occasionally take up the garden shears to trim the dead vines off the side of the building. However, most of the time, she was acting out her own personal story and she couldn't be bothered to tend to her chores.
The girl didn't "finish" her chores until very late at night, around midnight actually. I had already lost interest and flown off to find food but when I came back to that tree to sleep, I saw she was heading back inside finally, so I assumed she was done for the night and went to bed myself.
I originally wanted to snoop through the place to see if I could nab a few good things and learn more about these strange people but I was too tired. I'll sneak in tomorrow.
October 22nd
I'll admit. I forgot the owners of the asylum existed until they finally showed up towards noon. The girl was outside on the front steps pulling weeds while I wasn't too far away pecking at tree seeds in the grass when they came out through the front door and announced they were leaving to pick up more boxes at their previous home. Oh lord almighty, they really did move here to live here.
They left and not too long after, the girl hurried back inside with a clear mission in mind. Confused and interested in what the girl was up to, I followed her and flew through the door just before it was about to close. I hadn't been inside the asylum since I was forced to leave, and now that the electricity had been turned on and everything was in the middle of being renovated, the asylum looked much less unwelcoming than before. The dirt had been mostly cleaned up, some lights that still worked were on, and old paint had been peeled off (the graffiti still remained though). Progress was very obviously being made.
I followed her through the halls, being as quiet as I could (which was difficult because I don't have owl wings). Thankfully, she didn't hear me, and she continued on at a quick pace through the halls to a large kitchen. The girl brought out a collection of different snack foods and I watched in amazement as this frail-framed woman ate enough to possibly feed a whole family.
I watched her eat all that food, half-expecting something to happen, but nothing ever did. She just ate to her heart's content and then returned back to her spot outside and kept working. I was actually mildly disappointed by how anti-climatic it was.
I didn't spy on her for the rest of the day because I had lost interest and instead preferred to explore the surrounding woods for anything interesting. I didn't return until nightfall when I decided to call it a day and sleep.
I was settled comfortably in my nest when my brain decided it actually wasn't tired and I still had a few hours left to burn energy. After spending a good amount of time trying to sleep, however, I realised it wasn't going to work and I decided to spend the next few hours snooping through the asylum like I said I would.
The family had settled down for the day; the two idiot adults were in their room watching T.V. while laying on a mattress that they would soon put onto their currently-disassembled bed frame; and their daughter- who I had a hard time finding until I saw a hole in the roof that led straight to her- was laying on a large collection of newspapers with only a thin white blanket to protect her from the autumn chill.
I watched her from the rafters inside the ceiling and I was immediately taken aback by the room that she chose to call a temporary bedroom. Of all the somewhat decent rooms in this place, she went with the Crematorium for whatever reason. I couldn't help but wonder if she chose the room herself or if her parents forced her to stay there. And if they did, they must be some seriously messed up people. If I moved into an asylum (not likely) I certainly wouldn't choose the very place where dead bodies are burned to ash and stored on shelves.
In the corner of the room on a bottom shelf, I saw a box marked simply with bold black lettering that read "Alice". The box looked clean and new compared to the rest of the room so I made the obvious assumption that it belonged to the girl. Curious, I flew into the room and turned into my normal self to look through the box. There wasn't much at all; a bag of makeup, some clothes, a first aid kit, and some drawing supplies. Other than that, there was nothing that showed her personality or even anything of value for that matter.
Disappointed, I put the box back on the shelf but in the process, I accidentally made it slide a little too loudly on the old wood. The noise, although fairly small, was enough to startle the girl awake. I turned into a raven as quickly as I could and I was thankful she was still half asleep when she woke up because her movements were slow.
I wanted to fly away as quickly as possible but in my shock of being caught, I remained frozen where I stood. The girl landed her eyes on me and her tired expression slowly lightened up into a gentle smile. Now that I was up close to her, I could see she was actually much prettier than I had initially thought. She had faint freckles across her nose and cheeks and her eyes were a deep emerald green. She did, in fact, have a lip ring on her bottom lip and it somehow gave her more personality than the smudged black lipstick she wore with it.
The girl held her hand out to me and beckoned me closer as if I were a cat instead of a bird and in my dumbstruck state, I remained where I stood. The girl turned to face me completely and continued to beckon me closer but when I continued to not move like an idiot, she eventually stood up and walked closer to me.
At that point, I realised there was no real point in leaving now anyway. Clearly, she was happy to see me in this bizarre place, so maybe she had some food to give. Why act like a normal bird when you can get free food?
The girl's fingers gently traced my feathers and knocked me out of whatever trance I had been put in. I looked up at her and her expression, although pleasant, was lined with a mild sense of worry.
"Are you injured, birdie?" The girl's sweet voice broke the awkward silence and I stupidly refused to do anything. In all honesty, I could've spoken to her and made friends with her but I chose not to because it felt weird wanting to be her friend right after I broke into her room and snooped through her things.
So, despite me feeling rather uncomfortable, I let her pet me for a while and let her feel special that a bird stopped in her room and let her pet it. She giggled happily and ran her finger gently along my back, "You're a good bird."
I appreciated the compliment even though it was technically very false and continued to wait patiently for her to stop petting me. The affection was nice but the atmosphere in that building was suffocating and it was making me uncomfortable. However, just as I thought she had stopped petting me, she wrapped her fingers around me and picked me up to hold me. If it was one thing I didn't want, it was her holding me like some stuffed animal. I struggled in her hold and scratched at her arms before finally resorting to biting her fingers for her to let me go. She gasped in pain and dropped me and I finally took that chance to fly away to the safety of my nest.
I was expecting the night to go much differently than that. I wasn't expecting affection.