I woke up suddenly to a sickening feeling in my stomach. I groaned pathetically and rolled onto my back to try and ease the feeling but it only worsened. I laid there, completely motionless waiting for the nausea to subside and for my head to stop spinning. It took way longer than I would've liked but when it finally did somewhat disappear, I abruptly came to the realisation that the world felt distractingly larger. And my body felt much more familiar than it had been the past few days.
Confused, I slowly pulled myself and was immediately taken aback by the natural movements I had gone through for many years as a human boy. The relief and happiness overwhelmed me and my feelings were only made better when my eyes saw for themselves, my skinny human limbs and pale skin. All of a sudden, my nausea didn't even matter as my happiness in becoming human again pushed every other thought out of my mind.
It didn't even occur to me how this was possible or why it had happened. I was simply too excited to care. I stood to my feet and, even though my nausea caused me to lean on my knees for a moment, I still managed to find the strength to pinch my skin and run my fingers through my hair to make sure I wasn't just dreaming.
"We meet again." a voice disrupted my excitement and caused me to whip around in sheer fear. I instinctively covered myself and flushed red with embarrassment but my feelings only worsened when my eyes met with Hawky's familiar orange and green eyes. What more does he possibly want from me!?
"What is your problem!?" I asked in outrage.
Hawky sat a ways away from me behind an odd green campfire, he poked and prodded at it with a long stick and him, combined with the scenery around us made me almost think I was in some strange fantasy land, but it was real life and that fact was hard for me to process.
"Good morning," Hawky disregarded my question and his tone was disdainful.
"You didn't answer me," I pointed out, to which Hawky only flashed me a silent glare before returning to his task at the magical fire.
"You certainly have quite the attitude, boy... you should respect your elders," the man snivelled. I frowned as a rising annoyance bubbled within me.
"Well, I haven't exactly been feeling the nicest, considering you traumatized me right after I was just traumatized! Asshole," I spat. Hawky returned his gaze to me and he studied me intently from under his heavy brow.
"Well forgive me if my planning didn't coincide with your personal tragedies. I do not care for your mental state," he informed stoically and held out his arm to the space in front of the fire. I refused his offer and firmly kept my place where I stood.
"What is your problem?" I questioned in frustration.
Hawky's face remained completely the same and he set the stick next to him to focus completely on me, "My problem is you. Your future and existence are going to damn many people and cause much suffering... so I need you dead as soon as possible." His tone and how calm he was saying those words probably scared me more than the actual message. He clearly didn't value me as human life and only saw me as a problem and nothing else. I was just a plague to him.
"What-?" I squeaked.
Hawky's piercing stare remained fixed on me and I felt smaller under his gaze and far more vulnerable than before.
"You heard me very well, boy. I turned you into an animal so you would be easier to kill... of course, I never counted on you to meet that other bird. You're clever, I'll give you that," Hawky explained calmly
"Why do you care about what I do to other people?" I wondered weakly. Hawky gestured to the place in front of the fire again and finally, I decided to listen. I slowly approached the spot and hesitantly sat down in the grass. I was tense and untrusting but I would rather be painfully tense than be relaxed when he suddenly strikes and tries to kill me.
"Creatures like you aren't supposed to exist. They are unholy, even for us witches and warlocks. It's not really a matter of me caring what you do to other people. It's me caring about this plain as a whole," the man explained seriously but I couldn't hide my disbelief.
"'Creatures like me'? What are you? Racist against kids?" I sneered. Hawky blinked slowly and stared at me as if I had said something utterly stupid. I didn't understand why he didn't think that was a little funny but whatever. He was a sourpuss anyway.
"I am not 'racist against kids', in fact, I'm rather fond of them... when I met you, I thought you were just as normal as all the others... but when I looked into your future to see if you would have happiness in the future... I was disappointed to find your unfortunate fate. You only exist to be an omen of death," he explained morbidly. I didn't know what to think of his words but I knew for a fact I didn't like a second of it. I had no idea what delusion he was so hopelessly lost in but I didn't like how he had dedicated part of his life to giving me living Hell.
"Can I go now?" I wondered snidely.
Hawky didn't acknowledge my question and instead changed the subject entirely.
"Obviously, I can't simply turn you into an animal again and chase you down until you're dead. You know too much... Instead, I can offer you a deal," he stated. Not knowing what else to do, I just stared at him until he continued to speak, hoping that if I made it seem like I was interested, I'd be able to leave without him murdering me over his delusion.
"I can let you live... even let you keep your raven form if I'm feeling generous enough. But I'll need you to stay with me so that I can keep you away from others," he went on and the moment his statement processed in my small, idiot brain, I stood up and screamed at him.
"Are you shittin' me!? I am not staying with you even if it were my only option!" I yelled angrily. Without a word, the man reached into his heavy coat and pulled out a necklace made of bone. It was a bird skull necklace, with tiny vertebrae framing the skull on either side and held together by a thin chain. I've seen this necklace only once before and it was around Hawky's neck. I remember being intrigued by it for some reason and now that I was staring directly at it, I remembered the reason why I was intrigued. There was an odd "energy", so to speak, that surrounded it and seemingly drew me towards it. It invaded my mind and I never became so obsessed with anything quicker.
"If you join me, I'll give you this fancy trinket as a token of my gratitude," he stated and rocked it back and forth on his finger as if he were teasing me with it. All I could think about was the necklace and nothing else. Everything was just the necklace.
"Alright," I agreed blindly, not even thinking about what I was just agreeing to. Hawky smiled pleasantly and hoisted his frail body to his feet. My eyes remained glued to the necklace and my fingers were twitching to grab it.
Eventually unable to hold back any longer, I reached for the necklace, but just before I could grasp it in my fingers, Hawky pulled the necklace away and sneered, "I'll only give it to you if you swear an oath to me. This necklace holds great power, I don't just offer it to greedy brats like you."
I only stared at Hawky with a blank expression. I was still too enthralled by the unique piece of jewellery to care about what the loon said. It was practically possessing me. I wasn't considering anything outside of this necklace because, at that moment, no other life existed outside of this necklace. I wanted it more than anything I've ever wanted before. In all honesty, if I were to choose between having a family again and having the necklace, I would most definitely choose the necklace.
"Okay," I agreed softly, "I'll do whatever you want..."
Hawky grinned and tossed the necklace to me. I caught it quickly and the feeling of the bones against my skin sent unnerved but excited chills down my spine. I put it on and the moment the skull hit my chest, a previously unseen jewel in the eye-sockets of the skull turned a vibrant green colour. I was awed by its beauty and it almost felt that, now that it was mine and in my possession, I was suddenly stronger than before.
My eyes focused on the old man, who was talking to me and bringing out a cluster of folded clothes from a bag that sat beside him. I wasn't listening to him; my mind was focused on him and swirling with impulsive thoughts.
I don't know why I thought it was a good idea. I don't know what fueled me to do it in the first place. But one second, I was standing and staring and the next, I was walking towards him with thoughts to kill him. He turned to me to address me directly but before he could react to me suddenly being so close, I grabbed him by his coat and wrestled him to the edge of the hill behind him.
The man yelled in outrage and cursed at me, grabbing me by my shoulders to push me off. I was much more nimble than he was, so even if he managed to push me off, I was always rushing back and shoving him closer to the cliff edge.
"You stupid worm! You're making a big mistake!" he growled as we struggled back and forth. His long nails dug into my skin but I was numb to the pain. I was fueled by whatever murderous intent invaded me. He managed to wrench me off of him again but like the previous times before, I came hurrying back. My thin, weak body came barreling into his and the force was enough to knock the man off balance. He rocked dangerously back and forth on the edge, grabbing the air around him to keep balance before eventually deciding I was good enough and pulling me off the edge with him.
His screams were loud in my ears as he fell and rolled down the rocky hillside. I only managed to escape his grasp when the thought of flying away came to me. All at once, his hands that dug into my skin for dear life were grabbing for air once more while I abruptly transformed back into a raven and flew off. I hovered over the cliff, watching the man as he screamed bloody murder and rolled painfully down the cliff until he became stuck under some rocks.
The silence was too loud after his screaming ceased. All I heard was the pleasant chirping of other birds in the distance and the gentle breeze in the grass. Even the magical green fire had died with Hawky and all that was left was the silence and my guilt.
He's dead... I killed him... murdered him in cold blood. I just ruthlessly shoved him off a cliff for no other reason than to get rid of him... I shouldn't have killed him...That wasn't me. I never thought of killing Hawky when I was younger; I never thought of killing anybody! I'm only eleven and barely even new to being orphaned and homeless and already I have blood on my hands. This isn't right.
What have I done...
...
It's been several hours it seems...maybe it was just a few minutes. I'm not even sure anymore. I've been sitting by the dead fire with my legs up to my chest. Mostly I was rethinking my choices over and over and wondering if I had messed up. I was so enthralled by the necklace that I wasn't thinking about my consequences and now I had no idea what to do or where to go or where I even was. I didn't even feel like it was worth it anymore.
After a while, though, I eventually bucked up (mostly due to hunger) and put on the clothes that Hawky had brought for me. I didn't like them and they were quite big on me, but they worked just fine and kept me warm. I only hoped they would stay on my body whenever I use the necklace.
They did stay on after I tested my newfound abilities out, which filled me with relief that my situation would be easier to handle. I also snooped through Hawky's old bag to see what he carried on him that could be potentially useful. Among bags of assorted nuts and dried fruit (which I gladly ate), there was also a collection of vials filled with different liquids and powders, as well as a small loaded handgun. The vials didn't interest me as much as the handgun did- I just assumed they were his bullshit potions. Naturally, as anyone else would, I kept the contents of the bag and slung it over my shoulder to take with me.
I also, even though I felt terrible doing it, flew down to Hawky's body and stole his coat off him. It was a nice coat and despite being put through Hell and back after rolling down the hill, was still in good shape and could keep me warm. This was also too big for me but I didn't care. It worked and I accepted it.
I left when the sun was at its highest point in the sky and I flew off with the hopes of finding Will again but not really counting on it.