Lenny: This is just like high school. Get drunk, get in a fight, wind upback at Lamonsoff's, eating eggs.
Eric: Except for the drunk part, Mommy.
Mrs. L: All you guys together brings back so many memories.
Marcus: Whoa, Dickie, is this you and Lenny?
Dickey: Let's see. Yeah, me and Hollywood were best friends in kindergarten.
Kurt: What happened?
Dickey: What do you mean, "What happened?" We were in different classes. We kind of drifted apart, right? Yeah. He was in those smart classes. I was in the other classes.
They see an old baby photo of Eric
Lenny: Why do I know my new kid's gonna end up looking like that?
Mrs. L: You're having a baby, Lenny?
Lenny: Yeah. Yeah, so I'm told, Mrs. Lamonsoff.
Mrs. L: Oh, a surprise, huh?
Lenny: Yes.
Mrs. L: People today try to plan things out so much. But don't think an unexpected child is loved any less than one you planned for. Someday, Lenny, you won't even remember what life was like with just 4 children. You think we wanted Eric? He was an accident. Mama. His father and I were in the men's room at a Patriots game...
Eric: You know what, I think I'm just gonna turn the page here. I'm turning the page.
Lenny: Finish the story!
Back at the Feders house
Roxanne: Officer Dante's passed out on our lawn.
Lenny: I know. I saw him trying to arrest an ant hill. Want to talk about the whole pregnancy thing?
Roxanne: Mmm. It's okay. We'll talk tomorrow.
Lenny: Okay Okay, you go to sleep. I'll make this between me and the baby. Hello in there. This is your daddy speaking. I just want to tell you welcome to the family, and I love you very, very, very much. I really don't care if you're a boy or girl. I just need you to promise me one thing. When you're in elementary school, study ballet, so I can see that teacher as much as possible.
Roxanne: Hey!
Lenny: I knew that was coming. To be honest, I don't need no stinking ballet teacher. I'm married to the most beautiful woman in the world, your mommy.
Roxanne: Are you saying sweet things to me because you want to fool around?
Lenny: That would be a nice way to kick off the summer.
Roxanne: Okay, Mr. Romantic. But let's do this quick, we have a big day tomorrow, okay?
Lenny: Absolutely. Watch your head in there. Whoo! Hang on. Hang on. I'm sorry, honey. Don't move. Don't move. Oh, my God, I'm going to! I did it! I burp snarted! Yes!
Roxanne: Lenny, grow up!
Lenny: I did it for the baby!