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Soul bounds is itched in one's DNA and the body is conditioned to activate it once it is fully mature.
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She sips her hot cocoa as she smells the scent of summer. It's not hot as she had been this afternoon. It's not as hot as she expects it to be. It's rather cold and the air is humid. She shouldn't be out in the balcony. However, Taehyung had pulled her from her nest of gloom.
She had been isolating herself the whole afternoon from the others, claiming that she had to have time to reflect and think. Her mind was too muddled up and too preoccupied for the truths that came about. The belief that her father didn't care, her uncle's trust and her dangerous soul bound that she somehow has inherited from her mother. The eldest's behavior added up on her sadness as well. She was hurt because Jin was not talking to her and she didn't know what she had done wrong.
"Let him be for now." She remembers how Jimin whispered to her as he lovingly kissed her forehead. "He was blaming himself for approving the extended time to go back to you. He thinks that if he didn't agree on it, these things shouldn't have happened."
She didn't know that the eldest is having such thought. Perhaps the session in the morning had triggered it. She really wants to approach the man and tell him that it was not his fault.
"Sweetheart." Taehyung's spirited call pulls her back to her senses. "Look... what do you think?" He asks as he raises a large canvass with a funny looking painting.
"That's beautiful. You did this?" She beams at his art. She can't help but smile... however cumbersome her feeling is... however scrambled her brain is. It's easy to grace the man with a sweet smile. He has that effect on her.
"Yup." He proudly says as he pops the letter p. "I was thinking of you when I painted this last week.
"You mean I look like that?" She stops smiling and raises her brow.
"Of course... can't you see your thick lashes, your cute nose, your plump lips?" The man points every feature of the painting that fits hers. At least, in his artistic point of view.
She almost barfs a loud laugh.
"I don't look like that." She giggles instead as she shakes her head. "I don't have big mouth Tae Tae oppa!" She whines. "Why would you paint me like that?" She asks.
"We had this great idea to make merchandise for ARMY and I planned to make this as pins together with some of my creations." He chuckles. "Isn't it neat?"
"Uhuh... But you can't tell everyone that it looks like me." She softly threatens.
"Of course... not until you allow me to shout to the world that you are my soulmate." He sweetly says as he sits on the chair beside her.
"Taehyung!" She wails. "That's unfair, we talked about that already."
They had agreed never to reveal her face. At least not now.
"I know, sweetheart. I'm sorry. But don't blame me if I'll tell the world that my soulmate looks like this." He playfully pouts his lips and comically bats his eyes widely, mimicking the painting, if it has been a real person.
She laughs and playfully hits his chest. Kim Taehyung is just so funny.
"Thank you." She whispers to the man as he sits beside her. Her face is rosy from laughing so much.
"I love you too." Taehyung whispers back.
Her eyes widen with his confession. She searches the words in his gentle orbs and sees the truth and sincerity within it. She simply nods.
"I know that deep inside, you couldn't smile and laugh as much as you want to." Taehyung tucks the strands of her hair as the wind messes with the strands. "Your hair is getting longer sweetheart, and I don't mind you cutting it like the first time we have a date. That was cute. Have you tried dying it red or blue? It would be beautiful and you would be more -"
She giggles once again.
"What?" He asks sardonically.
"I was listening so attentively then you insert your comments on my hair and -" She points out.
"Anyhow..." He interrupts, dismissing her effortlessly. "I love you. Whatever you are thinking now, I hope it would melt down so I could see your genuine smile again."
She nibbles on her lips and squints her eyes. "So, you are telling me I was not genuine?"
"I'm just saying." Teahyung nonchalantly says. "It feels empty. Like I am talking to you here but your mind is there far away." He points to the roofs of other mansions ahead. "Or perhaps to the room next to ours."
She zips her mouth. The man knows her too well. But honestly, her Tae Tae is the only one who could make her laugh like that even with her heavy heart.
Her gaze happens to the room beside them. The lights are on yet it is so quite. It seems that the eldest is not even inside. "I really want to talk to him. I'm not sure if I can sleep without talking to him." She admits.
"It's okay if you want to go there." Taehyung encourages. "I don't mind to be left alone here with my painting."
Her Taehyung is really a kind man.
She gratefully smiles, stands up and sits on the man's lap earning him a loud gasp. "Sweetheart. I didn't know you are into this... I know I am hot but I can't take you here with other people probably spying on us with their telescopes." Taehyung protests dramatically.
"Shut it Tae." She softly whispers as her lips caress his cheeks and then hugs him so dearly.
"Well... if you insist." He hums as he starts kissing her collarbones.
"Tae-tae..." She whines. Her gaze scolding. She can see his playfulness melting. "I want to talk to Jinnie-oppa." She whispers.
He sighs. "I was so excited finally having my alone time with you. It was unfair with Jungkook having you yesterday." He pouts.
She blushes. She thought no one heard them for no one was mentioning about it. It seems Teahyung heard everything.
Taehyung slaps her bum. "Come on sweetheart. Don't you want to talk with Jin-hyung? If you'll stay longer, I'm afraid I couldn't let you go to him."
She smooches his cheeks and stands. "I'll be back."
"I don't think you can." Taehyung sighs.
**********
The door creaks gently as she pushes it to open. The room's light is a little mellow giving a light mood. She looks around yet the man she's searching is not there. She steps inside and there at his side table is an empty bottle of wine.
She's about to step outside, back to the balcony where she left Taehyung when she hears a gentle slashing sound of water. It seems that Jin is in the shower.
She steps inside the tiled room and there she sees Seokjin inside the glass shower cubicle with his wet naked broad back and supple butt facing her. It's blurred with the mist of hot water but the form has been engraved in her brain.
She gulps and clumsily sits on the bathroom sink, knocking down a hand soap and a toothbrush at the side.
"Joonie... I'm already following your suggestion to sober up. No need to guard me up... I promise I won't add more glass." There is a bit of sway on his voice.
"Good because I don't need you drunk." She replies.
Silence.
Each droplet of water seems louder. It echoes throughout. Seokjin is unmoving underneath the shower head. He just lets the water flow through his skin and to the wet tiled floor.
She got nervous as she stares on her hands. She starts to fidget. Her confidence of wanting to talk is waning. "I know you don't want to see me, but just hear me out." She starts, no longer looking at the man inside the shower cubicle. "Jimin told me that you blamed yourself for permitting the plan of delaying your flight home... But it was not your fault. It was all mine." Her lips wobble. She had pretended that she was fine. She had lied.
Silence prolongs. It's making her more uneasy.
"Yeah... It was your fault." Seokjin answers. It was a loud whisper. A spiky nudge to her heart.
She gulps.
The shower stops sloshing. She can hear the wet flap of his feet to the floor as it nears but she can't look up. The weight of her sin is heavy on her shoulders. Her heart shivers as his warm fingers lifts her chin up, capturing her gaze towards his.
There in his puffy eyes, she can only see the darkness of the abys. It's like the black hole of the universe. The multitude stars that are always evident on the eyes of her seven are no more. The vacuum is pulling her in and truly see his emotions.
She can see betrayal. She can see the pain and its wounds manifested within the hollowness of his irises.
Her heart breaks into fragments of what she had done.
"I trusted you Daun-ah. I trusted your honesty. I trusted you to tell us what you felt but you didn't."
She starts to tremble.
"I had been feeling special to have felt you wherever I may go. And when I realized I couldn't, it devastated me. Then I thought that it was okay. I believed I could trust you. I was consoled. "
' I had broken that trust.'
"Do you know what could have happened, Daun-ah?" Seokjin's eyes redden and swell with the water that threatens to fall.
"Oppa." Her brows are crossed as she wills herself not to sob. Because she has no right to cry. She is the one who had taken him for granted. She thought that Seokjin could talk for her. She thought she could just keep silent and depend on his soul feel. Be a villain or a hero, whatever her heart desires. Yet she knows it would be unfair. Seokjin is not a mind reader. He is not Yoongi who could listen to her.
What she did was grave.
"The bruises were signs of rotting. Your body had a shock as it was pulled with your soul for it was not meant to be." Mrs. Song's words whirl around her brain.
"I could have lost you." He helplessly leans to her body and sobs. His wet nakedness is helplessly clinging on her form. She couldn't do anything but to embrace him. "I didn't know why I lost my soul feel Daun-ah. I didn't know. If I could had have felt you, I shouldn't have agreed on it. I shouldn't have been convinced with your sweet smiles."
The words are like arrows speared to her heart. Seokjin trusted his soul feel but it failed him. And when he transferred that trust to her own words, he felt betrayed once more. If she hadn't played fine, then it would have never happened.
"I thought I was going to die looking at your lifeless body. I thought I couldn't hug you anymore like this." He mumbles on her neck and slides to her breast.
"W-what should I do so that you can forgive me?" She whispers on the top of his wet dark hair.
"Just please be honest. Be honest. You can tell us whatever you think... Whatever you want. You can command us to go back to you or have a tantrum until you get what you want." Jin looks into her eyes and she feels so naked to him. She feels so vulnerable.
"That's selfishness Jinnie." She whispers.
"Then be a damn selfish person!" His head snaps far from her only to angrily look on the pools of her doe eyes. His voice booms in the bathroom. It doesn't help how the walls made it more terrifying. It makes her yelp in fear.
"B-but..."
"Don't you ever think that you are a burden Daun-ah. Don't you know how far we were searching for you? How many countries we had to go and how many detectives to hire just to see you? We were so desperate to have you. We had fought for the uncertainties of your existence. We had been nothing without you Daun-ah." He shakes her shoulders as he lists all the things that they have been through.
Her head bobs as she weakly whispers an "I know...". Taehyung had told her once how they longed for her. The soul signs were a catalyst that made them aware that she does really exist. They were having more concerts than necessary. They didn't bother the fatigue it brought them. It slowly withered them. All in the hopes that they can have a glimpse of her, yet they failed.
His eyes becomes gentle as he encloses her once again in a tight hug, slotting himself in between her legs.
It becomes quite again. She can only hear their breaths as they eventually inhale and exhale synchronously. She leans to him. Both of their hearts are erratic.
"Jinnie-" She wants to say something. His nakedness worries her. He might get cold. He might get sick.
"Shhh..." He cuts her. "I'm the eldest. It pained me so hard to have thought to be a Soulo after imagining myself of becoming a great husband. I was almost twenty when I decided to just repurpose myself to an entire foreign thing. Singing. Dancing. The latter was so damn difficult. Jungkook was already twenty-one when we found out about us in Multiples. Guess how old I was?"
"Twenty-" She wants to answer but he cuts her up, as if her answer doesn't matter. As if he is only mumbling to himself.
"Yup. Twenty-six. A laughing stock to my friends. An odd cousin. A pitiful son. I was a fucking Soulo for eight years! Imagine that. I was so fucked up if not only with the members' kindness. I almost gave up on life yet my work gave me purpose. They gave me purpose. My life only revolved around them. Then the soul signs came, my soul feel came and then you. Do you know how horrifying it is to have envision your life full with bliss and then realize that your soulmate would be leaving you cold?"
"Jin-" She wants to soothe him as she feels him shudder.
"No... you don't get to interrupt me." He slurs and he leans heavily forward. She has to find her strength to balance the two of them.
"I was so afraid." He whispers.
Silence. Her heart is so much heavier with all his confessions. She had expected to be Soulo too but she accepted it. Yet, this man hoped to be with a soulmate. Just a day ago, she scared him to death with her lies. She had thought it would be harmless. She had thought it would make their work easier.
The door opens wide and comes Namjoon. "Oppps. I don't mean to interrupt both of you." He grins and walks out.
"Joonie-oppa." She calls. It's weird that the man leaning on her is becoming so heavy and immobile. His heart is no longer beating like a festive drum. It's more calm and serine.
"Yes?" The man answers as he peeks towards them.
"Help?" She whispers.
"Ohhh... shoot. Is he sleeping on you?" Namjoon teases.
"Joonie... my spine is about to crack." She whines.
"Maybe the alcohol had finally hit him." Namjoon gently pulls Jin from her. Sure enough, the eldest had gone to dreamland. His brows are adorably crunched up and his plump lips slack as he breathes.
"Easy Joonie." She whispers as Namjoon drags the man towards his bed.
"This is why I told him not to drink whisky." Namjoon mumbles.
"Whisky? But I saw a bottle of wine." She utters as they place him gently to the bed.
"Well... Yoongi-hyung would fuck him up for draining the bottle almost to the bottom and even added a wine on it."Namjoon sighs.
"Two bottles of alcohol?" She ask shocked. 'That is not totally healthy!'
"Yup. I know." The man nods as if he could hear her. "That's why I had to coax him to stop it."
"Thank you, Joonie." She is so grateful that her seven also looks out for each other. "I'll better clothe him with a pajama, then."
"Do you need help?" He starts to open a cabinet and comes tumbling Jin's huge RJ luggage and out of it comes a pile of neatly folded clothes to the floor. She could see the awkward twitch of Namjoon's brow.
"No. I-I think I can manage." She smiles as she sweats. She doesn't think he would be much of a help.
She stealthily stands up and picks the growing mountain of crumpled clothes on the floor as the man attempts to push it back to the luggage.
"Good night then." He stands as he scratches his head. Dimples are showing as he puckers his lips and smooches her a kiss. "I don't think hyung would be okay for tomorrow's interview."
"You have an interview?" Her eyes wide. She thought he had talked the manager on postponing their interviews within this week.
"Well... we couldn't postpone this one." He answers before she could question. "You can talk a lot tomorrow. We will be out so early. Good night, love."
"Night." She whispers as she accompanies him until his exit with her gaze.
She looks back at the sleeping man. He sure had drowned himself to alcohol with what happened. And those confession...
'She really needs to do better. She blushes as the man moves and she realizes that he is still butt naked.
After a while, she slots herself by his side, deciding to sleep beside Seokjin and take care for him.
"I promise I won't lie anymore." She mumbles as she caress his newly blow dried hair. This time, she ought to keep the promise. She doesn't want anyone to be hurt like this again.