The darkness started to dominate the sky when I was on my way home from school. It was unusual for me to stay in school for the whole day when I am used to celebrating Valentine's Day with my mom.
Today is not just any Valentine's Day because today is my birthday too. Maybe many people are actually excited for this day to come around but do not include me. I am not bitter but I would rather be at home reading my notes than walking around the streets to find my soulmate.
I stayed at school for the whole day because I joined a singing contest for the first time. My mom always pushes me to sing in front of the crowd but I am always thinking about what will the audience say so it caused me to be frightened and not to do it anymore. However, I do not want to be a coward in my entire life that is why I decided to join and face my fear. I practiced every day before this day.
When I was at the back stage, my hands began to sweat and I can hear my heart beats so loud that I thought about fainting. Fortunately, I did not.
When it was my turn to step on the stage, my knees started to shake and I can barely step forward. I took a deep breath before singing "Destiny" in front of the hundred pairs of eyes. At that moment, I ended up singing the song with heart and soul. People applauded and I almost cry to their appreciation. I was awarded as the 2nd place of the annual Valentine's Day singing competition.
I was so happy that I wanted to fly back to our house and share the victory with my mom.
"Hi Mom, I'm here!" I cheerfully said while getting inside the house. I was holding my silver medal that blinks every time light strikes to it.
Okay. This is odd. No answer. This house was never been so quiet, except now. There must be something wrong.
I went to the living room to find her and saw my mom crying on the couch. She hurriedly wiped her tears with her wrinkled fingers.
I hastily run to her side, while sitting on the couch. "Mom, are you okay?" I hugged her, and her warm and fragile body rested against mine.
"Yeah, I'm okay baby." She said but I did not buy it. Honestly, when she says she's okay, she's not. It is obvious. I've been with her for my whole life so I know if she's just acting okay or not.
When she turned around and looked into my eyes, I saw her eyes in sorrow. I rubbed her back, making little circles. I can't take the fact that she's in pain. My mom plays two roles in my life; as my mother and father. That is why it kills me inside every time I see her like this.
"Mom, you're not okay. I can see it. Why are you crying? Please tell me." I leaned closer to her.
Seeing her like that broke my world into parts.
Every time I see her crying, stories about her past frequently flash back.
My mom tells me stories about her past but there is only one story that I cannot forget.
She once told me that when I was just a month old baby, my dad went abroad with my brother to be with his mistress. I cannot even imagine why he did that and how it broke her heart. She is too perfect to be treated like that. This is unfair. After years later, our world almost crashed when we heard about my dad and brother died in a car accident. She cursed my dad in bringing my brother with him. And because of that, she often cries.
If I am on her shoes right now, I do not know how to get rid of the scar made by unfaithfulness and death of my son. I know she is having a hard time overcoming it. I want to help her but I do not know how to help get her out of that cage.
She's my life and everything. So if I have superpowers, I will erase all the things that makes her suffer and broken.
"No honey, I'm okay. I just can't believe that you're already grown up." She faked a smile and reached our for the box beside her.
"Happy 17th birthday Honey." She embraced me and I felt her heartbeat against my chest. Every time I hug her, it always felt that I am safe under her arms.
"uhhhh.. Mom, thank you. I love you." My tears started to form because of joy. She handed me the box and I saw a necklace with my initials on it. She's too caring, I wouldn't wish for another mom.
I know she's lying about the "I'm okay thingy", but what should I do? I don't know how to help her because I, personally, don't know how.
As I was staring at her pale and freckled face, she jumped off the couch which made me flinch. I gave her a confused look.
"C'mon Honey. Because it's your birthday, we have to celebrate." She squealed.
Ok. Now, she's having mood swings.
"Like now? It's already 8 o'clock in the evening and it is raining outside." I pointed out.
"So? It's not too late to celebrate, isn't it? We're just going to eat outside in a restaurant and we'll be home after." I like her when she acts like a kid. She's so funny. I wish she's always like this.
"Okay, fine." Giving her a smile, "just wait for me, I'm just, just going to change my clothes." I hastily bolted to my room.
**********
"Are you ready? This gonna be fun." She said childishly.
She turned on the engine and off we go.
As we hit the road, five minutes of silence filled the air.
"Mom-" I looked at her, "Thank you." I smiled.
"Sure Honey, anytime. Always remember that I love you."
"Love you too mom."
I'm definitely not the type of girl who always say "I love you". It's just, if I said it, I mean it. I think she deserves to feel that someone will always be there by her side.
"What is your birthday wish?" she held my hand.
"You. Please don't leave me." I started to cry. I cannot imagine my life without her.
"ssshhh. No crying please. I won't do that." She cooed.
I really feel safe, happy and complete when she's around.
She's my SUPERMOM!
No words can describe her, nothing.
"Where do you want to eat?" cutting off the topic.
"McDonalds, I guess. I'm starving." Rubbing my stomach which made her laugh.
"Okay. Hold on. We're almost there."
I felt excited when I said McDonalds. It is my favourite though. I love foods. However, I do not gain weight.
I was too busy thinking about how to lessen my mom's suffering when a honk of a truck woke me up.
************
"Mom, look out!!!" I shrieked.
My mom tried to get of the trucks lane but it was too late. I forcibly closed my eyes and heard the sound of crashed, broken lights. After that I fainted.