It's been a strange and emotion filled few days. I saw Axle last on Sunday and I could tell he was avoiding coming here.
It was now Wednesday and Aly's party was in 2 days. We were all pretty excited and I've been seeing Carter everyday since Sunday.
He would stop by, just to see me then leave. He never came to my room. Or flung my door open. Or touched my hair. And he never spoke rough words in my ear. I was starting to miss that.
I kept telling myself that we did the right thing. Because we did.
No matter what happened, and no matter how I felt about Axle Kingston, I loved my brother and all I want is for him to be happy. When I saw Lo with the bruise on his face a couple days back, I realized that Axle would have to stop his possessiveness over me.
I spent most of the time in my room. I watched Vampire diaries for the 50th time and enjoyed my own company. My papa was busy, Aly was busy and there really was no one else I wanted to interact with.
Except Matteo.
He wasn't home much, he was busy at the warehouses but when he came home he would sit in my room and we'd talk till the sun came up.
I couldn't risk telling him about Axle, so I never did. But that feeling when something is eating at you, and the only one you would want to talk to about it is the one person you can't talk to. And that really sucked.
Matteo was an idiot, but he understood what it felt like to be alone. Not so much alone, but lonely.
I loved being around my family, and I wasn't short of a single thing but sometimes you can be surrounded by people and still feel alone. And I guess that's the way it felt now.
That night played in my mind over and over again. It was the right thing to do.
I decided to stop feeling sorry for myself and go downstairs. This time, I didn't just glue my happy face on. I felt good.
It was Wednesday afternoon. My papa was in meetings the whole day but everyone was going to be home tonight. Lo and Matteo. So I decided to plan a family dinner.
I texted Lo and told him not to eat on the way home.
I called our housekeeper, Luisa and she helped me chop whatever vegetables needed chopping.
I had chicken roasting, potatoes steaming and vegetables sautéing. The smells filled the entire house. Whenever I got in front of the stove I thought of my mother. She was the one who taught me how to make the basic things.
I wasn't a good cook, I'll admit it but the few things I could make, I made to perfection. Roast chicken was one of those things.
I handpicked rosemary from the garden and started setting up.
It was now past 7pm and my mother came downstairs for dinner.
After the table was set I called my papa and yelled at him to rush home. He was there in about 20 minutes.
"ay bella, this all smells wonderful." he said and kissed the side of my head.
"I hope to God you didn't cook, we'll die of salmonella." Matteo said.
"the one time I undercooked your pasta and you never let it go." I said and smiled at him. It was like 8 years ago, he was very sick after that.
Lo came and kissed my cheek. He was happy, he was marrying a lovely girl soon.
"are we expecting guests?" my mother asked from the other head of the table.
"no. I just wanted us all to be together." I said and sat next to Lo.
He smiled at me and my dad sent the wine around the table.
My mother refused.
I sighed. I just wanted tonight to be normal. But she was back to her old self. I barely spoke to her the last few days. I never noticed how she was behaving toward everyone else.
"well, to Lo. Getting married soon and being happy. I love you Lo. You're the worst brother ever" I said and raised my glass. Everyone cheered in agreement.
The night was mostly silence and clattering of silverware.
I didn't mind it. I was just happy to be out of my room and my mind on something else.
After dinner, my papa had lots of things to do with Matteo and Lo, so I went upstairs to my room.
My phone started ringing and for a split second I hoped it was Axle. But it wasn't, it was Carter.
I took a deep breath and slid my thumb across the screen to answer the call.
"hello Mr Agnello, to what do I owe the pleasure?" I said and smiled. I sat down on my bed and looked out the window listening to his voice.
"good evening Ms Hayes, I believe the pleasure is all mine listening to your voice. Tell me, have you eaten tonight?" he asked and I smiled harder. He was perfect.
"I wish I didn't, but I just ate a while ago. I made some pretty good chicken if you want to come over." I said and hesitated but the words were already out of my mouth before I could stop myself.
"ah, I am on the way to you. I just picked up a bottle of sauvignon blanc. Get dressed, I'll take you for a drive, yeah?" he said and my heart fluttered. For that moment, Carter Agnello was all I could think of. And I enjoyed that moment more than I thought I would.
"thank you Carter, I'll be ready soon." I said and hung up.
I threw myself out of bed and went into my bathroom. I brushed my hair into a ponytail and put on some lipstick. It was a warm night, so I put on a loose dress and threw on my bunny slippers.
After 10 minutes I heard the front bell ringing. My father went to answer the door.
"ah, Carter. Lovely to see you. What brings you by?" he asked with a glass of scotch in his hand.
"I'm here for Katerina. Taking her for a drive." he said and my father shook his hand. I was watching from the corner of the staircase where they couldn't see me.
"Katerina, Carter is here for you bella." he said and I made it look like I was walking out from my room.
I looked at the both of them, my father fixed his eyes on my shoes.
"did I pay for those?" he said and shook his head.
"not voluntarily." I said and went to him, he kissed the side of my head.
"not too late." he said and walked back to his study.
Carter took my hand in his.
"these shoes, they're my favorite ones of yours." he said and kissed my cheek. I smiled.
"well, I'm glad you like them. I'm going to get you a matching pair." I said to him and intertwined our fingers.
We hopped in his shiny car and took a quiet drive down the street.
"so, you all sorted for Aly's party tomorrow? You need me to get anything for you?" Carter asked, and looked at me briefly when he stopped at a red light.
"I'm good. I got my dress steamed today. I also got my nails done, do you like them?" I asked, and put my nails in front of the dashboard. He broke his concentration on the road and pulled my hand to look at my nails.
He ran his thumb across them and smiled."they're beautiful, try not to scratch yourself." he said, and I smiled.
The lights on the streets shone into the car as Carter pulled over near the display. I didn't want to get off, because I was in bunny slippers and I just wanted to enjoy his company.
He took my hand in his and opened the roof of the car. The air was brisk for a second, then it warmed up.
He tilted his seat back and I did too, and we gazed at the stars. We sat there in silence, and if I'm being honest any words would've ruined the moment.
The New York skyline was full of stars tonight. It was a beautiful sight and I wished that Axle was looking up at them, or at anything that would give him some sort of happiness. I worried that he would've gotten excessively drunk that night, but I didn't give myself that much power over him.
As we gazed into the sky, things felt right with Carter. And I enjoyed his company. I realized him and I could work. And I wanted it to. Not because I wanted a distraction or just to throw my attention onto someone else, I believed Carter was right for me. A safe choice. It didn't matter that there was no instant attraction or spark, that may develop over time. He's a good man, I'd be making the right decision.
But what do you do when you don't want to make the safe choice? You ignore the moody, grumpy, rough mouthed person on your mind, and focus on the one who dropped whatever he was doing to take you on a date to look at the stars.
I looked over at him and saw his stunning blue eyes focused on the sky.
"tell me what you're thinking about." I asked him.
He hesitated for a second. "nothing. Just enjoying the view. And you?" he said, and never looked down from the sky.
"nothing. Just trying to think of some names of stars to impress you." I said and he smiled. Showing off his dimple in his chiseled cheek.
"I know jack shit about stars. You could tell me one is named Pete and I'll believe you." he said and I laughed.
The air brushed both of us and we began to gaze at each other.
"you're beautiful Katerina Hayes. Have I told you that?" he asked and ran his hand through my hair and smiled gently at me.
"you always do. Thank you Carter." I said and put my hand over his as it was in my hair.
I never felt it. I'll never feel that way again. This didn't come close. But it was a start.
"tell me, what would you have done tonight if I hadn't picked you up?" he asked and placed his hand on the seat, taking mine with him.
"well I would've just sat and watched vampire diaries until it was too late and I had bad dreams." I said.
"ah, vampire diaries. An excellent show really, though I was team Stefan all the way." he said and I clenched my teeth as hard as possible.
"I definitely would like to argue with you on that one, but I don't want to ruin tonight." I said and smiled at him.
I was doing what Elena would've done at first. Chose the good one. But a part of me is living and dying with Axle Kingston. My very own Damon Salvatore, we just wouldn't get our happy ending. And besides, it's not like I had a choice anyway, so Elena and I weren't really in similar situations.
He smiled at me. "well, if I marry you, one day we can have it all out. I don't mind getting in a vampire diaries related argument." he said.
"hm, divorce isn't on the cards for us. You might not want to take that risk." I said, as gently as I could.
He just laughed and waved it off.
As the night went on, and the air got colder, Carter closed to roof of the car and began to drive me home. It was already 10pm and I really enjoyed my night with him.
He never crossed my mind. Not for very long anyway.
Carter said goodbye to me, but again never walked me to my door. I don't understand why he doesn't, and I was told by my father and brother that it doesn't show respect on his part but I overlooked it. My papa and Lo were just old fashioned.
I made my way upstairs, slipped out of my dress and put on a pink oversized shirt and shorts that disappeared underneath it.
I plugged my phone into the charger and saw 2 texts from Aly
'hi Ms Hayes.'
'i can't wait to see you tomorrow. Look as hot as possible, Carter isn't the only catch out there ;)'
I smiled at the texts and replied.
'well hello blushing bride, I can't wait to see you either. Don't forget, emerald goes with silver. Love ya :)'
I set my alarm for 9am, the party was starting at 6 and I had to run to the mall to pick up the gift I ordered for Aly. It was a vintage record of Taylor Swift's 22 that I needed to fetch. It reminded me of the night she slept over. And it reminded me of what it felt like to have a sister.
I rested my head on the pillow, not knowing our entire world would be flipped upside down in a matter of hours.