ship : 2min | minho x seungmin
genre : angst | fluff
type : storyline
relationship : friends(?)
status : requested by -SEUNGMIIN
! WARNING !
mentions of self harm
•
reality
"... and that leaves seungmin and minho, will you two be okay?" chan asked as he assigned the pairs for their slumber party vlive that night. they will be playing games in pair, so they decide by picking out names from a box and by the end of it, the final two had no choice but to pair up with each other.
seungmin was delighted to be paired with minho. ever since they played the divorced couple role in the group, he felt as if the other has been quite distant and that made him sad. he was hoping this would be the chance for them to get closer once again.
"i'm completely fine with-"
"yeah... i rather not." minho quickly cuts off seungmin, sending him in shock. "we're not gonna be a good team, we argue too much with each other." he continued, playfully glaring at the younger.
"we're divorced for a reason."
seungmin was taken aback from this. he didn't expect that coming from minho, who is someone who he admires a lot. he would just let it go if there's a camera, but there's literally no one else other than the members since they're planning for the vlive later all by themselves.
seungmin realized that minho has been acting so distant with him lately and on top of that he kept on taking the 'divorce concept' so seriously. at one point, seungmin wanted to turn back time and reject the idea of that concept but he's just an ordinary human. nothing he does will change the past.
he wanted to be able to be close with minho in public again. he didn't like acting as if he hate his favourite hyung in front of a camera. he despised the idea of them being apart just because of a fictional concept they once played in a roleplay.
"oh well okay than, i guess we can switch. i'll team up with seungmin and you can be with felix. is that better?" chan also didn't think there would be any problem, so he was also a bit surprised. he suggested the switch up and they all eventually agreed to the final teams.
seungmin didn't say anything though, he just went with the flow. he was too devastated to even interact with anybody at this point. sadly, he has no other choice but to bottle up his feelings until the vlive ends.
during the vlive, he had a hard time focusing on literally anything so every time it's his turn to play, he always messes up. even when a member called his name or reads a comment about him, he kept on spacing out.
he swore one time when he was so deep into his thoughts, he could hear minho says "forget him, let's just skip his turn." and that made his thoughts even worse. he left the live early with an excuse that he had an important call to answer when in reality, he just wanted to escape.
he took a step into the bathroom, feeling the strong urge to do something he never thought of doing again. ever since he debuted with the team, he thought the same urge have left his mind for good but he was wrong.
not even three years into their debut, he's already feeling like falling apart once again. last time he had this terrible desire, he was in his worst state of mind due to constant pressure and overthinking. he had tried to keep these habit under control throughout the years but today, he lost.
he knew he was already hurting inside thinking that some of his fans hate him for no apparent reason. he thought he could live through it by ignoring them, but he was dumbfounded to find out that minho might feel the same way.
judging from the way he treats him, he can tell that the older dislikes him in some way and that thought alone made his heart breaks. why else would minho treat him like shit if it's not because he absolutely despise him?
seungmin can't believe he has feelings for a person that wants nothing to do with him.
seungmin took out the pocket knife that he kept in his pocket before coming to the bathroom. he mainly use that knife for emergency but this time, he has no other thoughts other than to feel it on his skin.
the blade was relatively small, but it doesn't mean that it's not sharp. seungmin stared at the blade for several seconds, the urge of seeing the cuts on his arm growing even more.
now his mind is full of his negative thoughts, no other sound could enter his head. not even the excessive knocking on the door.
as he was about to let the blade pierce through his skin, the bathroom door flunged open, revealing a very anxious minho. "seungmin..." he muttered as his eyes scanned around the younger boy to see a pocket knife in his possession. he didn't wait one second before taking the knife away, putting it in his pocket.
"h-hyung w-what a-are y-you-" seungmin was so shocked to the point he can't even mutter a single word correctly. not only did his plan failed, but he was also discovered by the one he wants to avoid the most right now. he started shaking as soon as he felt his legs gave up on him and eventually fell on his knees.
why didn't i do it somewhere else? why must i be so stupid to do it in the fucking bathroom? why must minho hyung be the one to see me like this-
without letting his negative thoughts take over his entire headspace, seungmin was stopped by warm arms embracing him in a tight hug. his breath hitched as he heard soft sobs from the other, a tear also escaping from his own eyes.
"w-what were you t-thinking, min..." minho muttered under his breath, just enough for the other to hear. hearing that made seungmin even more confused. why was he so concerned? wasn't he the one who wants to throw him out of his life?
"p-please don't do that again, i beg you." he continued, his sobs getting louder as he tightens the hug. he was afraid that once he let go of the younger, he would never see the end of it. he couldn't let seungmin go.
seungmin sat there quietly, not knowing how to react. he didn't hug back for even a second, the voices in his head are still telling him to get out and run away, and his lips shut tight, not giving minho any response.
but even so, his heart tells him to stay in his embrace. to hug him back. to ignore the thoughts about running away. to tell him that he will be okay. to assure him that he won't do it again.
and to his own surprise, seungmin listened. seungmin listened to his heart.
the younger slowly wrapped his arms around minho's waist as he starts to shed tears on the other's shoulder, comfortably placing his head there for support. "i-i'm sorry hyung... i t-thought you hated me." seungmin mumbled, minho almost not hearing his exact words.
the older was so shocked to hear his response. he can't forgive himself for making seungmin feel this way. he can't believe he let someone so dear to him hurting because of his actions. what have you done, minho?
"s-seungmin, i would never hate you. i'm so sorry i ever made you f-feel that way. just please, don't ever d-do that again." minho pulled away from the hug and holds onto seungmin's face gently, his eyes still glassy from the tears. "i can't lose you..." he added, making seungmin's already-broken heart even more broken.
"hey is everything alright in there?"
the two boys was startled by a voice from outside the door, quickly recognizing it as chan's. "y-yeah hyung. you go ahead and go to sleep, we'll be out in a minute." minho replied, hoping that the crack in his voice didn't give away that something's not right.
"okay then... good night, you two." and as if he understands, chan took his leave. as a leader, he had expected something similar would happen between the two so he took this chance as a way to let those two resolve their problems on their own for once.
minho turned his attention back to seungmin, admiring every details of his gorgeous features. even with the tear-stained cheek and red nose, he still looks as beautiful as ever. "we should get going, we need to get you to bed." he said softly, caressing seungmin cheeks as he wipe the remaining tears. he got up and offered his hand, smiling sweetly at the younger.
the younger didn't say anything as he took minho's hand and slowly got up. they both washed their face and brushed their teeth together before they walked into the room they shared together, making sure that they didn't wake up hyunjin and chan.
the older got onto his bed and pulled seungmin to his side, surprising the younger. "you seems like you need company for the night." minho said, pushing seungmin's bangs away from his face and chuckled at his cuteness. the other didn't respond, but he gave a little nod of approval.
they both got under the covers and minho pulled seungmin close, his arms fully wrapped around the other's smaller figure. seungmin had never dreamed of sleeping inside minho's arms, but this exceeded his expectations. he feels so safe and warm, and most importantly, he feels at home.
ignoring the increasing pace of his heartbeat, the younger made himself comfortable in minho's embrace and he found himself resting his head on the older's chest. the soft sound of minho's heartbeat helped him relax and at one point, their heartbeat started to match each other's.
"you're so precious minnie, i would never want to hurt you." the older said out of nowhere. this made seungmin smile, but he just can't forget what happened earlier. "but why won't you team up with me, hyung? and why would you ignore my existence as we played the game? am i really precious?" he asked non-stop, his heart actually aching saying those words out loud.
minho was surprised by the sudden outburst and he could hear his heart breaking into pieces. he didn't know the words he chose hurt seungmin so badly that he was having bad thoughts. frankly, that was never his intention.
"i didn't want to team up with you because i hate acting as if i hate you when i actually don't. and i know if we did do that, it would end up hurting both you and me." he answered truthfully, seungmin looking at him as he listened intently.
"and i told the others to skip your turn because you seemed so distant and i noticed that you're not in the mood to play. i didn't want you to act like you're having fun just for stays, it made me sad to see you faking your emotions." he continued. this time he bravely lock his eyes with seungmin, their faces only a few inches apart.
"it made me sad to see someone i like hurting just for the sake of his fans."
seungmin eyes grew wide as heard what the older said. he was never aware that minho felt that way about him. he didn't think it was possible until he heard it from minho himself.
the older smiled sweetly and leaned closer to place a soft peck on seungmin's forehead and that alone made his heart explodes like fireworks. "you're more precious than you think. good night, gorgeous." minho whispered into his ear as he brought him closer into his embrace.
instead of freaking out over the close proximity between them, seungmin found comfort in minho's warmth. he relaxed to the older's scent, finding himself snuggling further into his chest.
"good night, hyung. thank you for everything." he muttered with his eyes closed. minho smiled as he heard it and they both drifted to dreamland.
—————
it's 4am and i haven't slept writing this :D
yeah my motivation came at 2am today and i was writing and editing non stop until now and yeah... i hope you guys enjoyed lmao ㅠㅠ
this was long overdue :( i'm so sorry it took me a while to finish your request but i hope you like it! thank you for requesting, really really appreciate it <3
also this is my first time writing something like this (the tw and stuff like that) so i'm sorry if it's bad, i have no experience at all ㅠㅠ