I wake up to the sound of birds chirping.
Thank God it's Saturday because I have a mountain of homework to do. I sit at my desk and blankly stare at a math worksheet. The numbers start to look like black and blurry blobs on the paper as I fall into a daydream;
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Elise and I were both 14 at the time, although we were both very mature for our age.
We were laying on our backs and watching the sunset after our run, sitting in a grassy field. The view looked like something out of National Geographic.
The silence lasted for a long time, I think our minds were elsewhere until Elise pulled me out of my thoughts, "Brynne, do you think we will be best friends forever?" She asked me as we soaked in the sunlight.
I looked over and admired her perfect skin that was glowing as the sun reflected off of it. The sweat gave her a dewey but ethereal look.
I giggled and responded, "We are gonna become old, crazy grandmothers together."
We both started to laugh.
She took my hand and placed it in hers.
"Tell me what you wanna do once you get older," She asks me.
I take a few seconds to think about my answer.
"I've always wanted to skydive," I smile.
She scoffs, "Sorry, but there is no way. I would much rather be at home, reading a book."
I rolled my eyes. Elise is anything but a daredevil.
"I also want to fall in love," I added.
Elise playfully hit me on the shoulder and said that we are both too young to be thinking about love.
I sighed and closed my eyes, imagining what it would be like to fall in love. I've seen movies where the main characters look to be obsessed with each other. They do crazy things for the other person. It's almost like their love blinds them to any interference. It looks crazy. I want to know how it feels. How it feels to have someone so engaged with you that they would do anything for you.
They'd die for you and, you'd die for them.
"What about you," I ask, "What's on your bucket list?"
She fidgets with the shoelaces on her sneakers.
"I've always wanted to visit France," She admits.
I've heard Elise talk about going to France before. She is practically obsessed with Beauty and the Beast.
"I'll take you one day," I assure her.
One day.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I snap out of my daydream and realize that it is already seven o'clock. Time seems to be slipping out of my hands, and I never seem to have enough of it. I brush the math worksheet off of my desk and let it fall to the floor. I look around the mess of my room, the textbooks in every corner and sticky notes covering the walls. It makes my head spin.
Inspired by my flashback, I pull out a sheet of notebook paper from a drawer in my desk and pick up a pen that happens to be pink, my favorite color.
I title the sheet "One Perfect Day."
I make a list of all the things I would do on a perfect day.
1. Skydive (obvious reasons)
2. See a Galapagos turtle (they live a long time)
3. Kiss in the rain (like from the movie The Notebook)
4. Name a star
5. Change my hair
6. Eat a whole deep dish pizza by myself
7. Go scuba diving
8. Hunt for seashells at the beach and bring them to some sick kids I met in the hospital
9. Hug a sloth (I heard they give the best hugs)
10. Make things right with Elise
11. Have a deep conversation with my mom
12. Help Grant get on the right path
Notice I didn't write fall in love. You can't fall in love in one day. That is something that takes time and patience, both of which I don't have. You see, I have a sort of obsession with love.
I want it so bad that I cant think about anything else. Every time a guy shows interest in me, I immediately get attached and want to spend every hour talking to him. Usually, this scares them away, and I never get the chance to get close to someone. It's a problem. One that I won't have to worry about anymore.
I take my hair out of my bun and let it fall onto my shoulders. It is starting to thin out since I am not eating enough. I take a look at myself in the mirror. My once muscular thighs are now bones with skin on them. I lift my sweatshirt. My abs have faded away leaving, my rib cage exposed. I look disgusting.
I wipe the tears from my eyes that I didn't notice were forming and look over at a picture frame on my dresser. This one is Elise and me two summers ago. We were in a helicopter taking a tour of the Grand Canyon. It was so much fun. We had the best time.
Thump.
What was that? I look around my room for something that may have fallen.
Thump.
It's coming from my window. I walk over and pull back the curtains. I immediately meet eyes with the last person I want to see.
Blake.
He's throwing rocks at my window. He signals for me to come down. I comply.
What does he want?
I walk down the stairs and meet my dad in the living room as he is reading a newspaper. He tilts his head to see me above his glasses.
"How are you feeling?" He asks with a smile.
"I'm doing better," I respond.
I walk towards the front door and begin to unlock it when he makes a concerned face.
"Relax dad, I promise I'm not going to run away. I just need a breath of fresh air."
I think he's on edge because Grant has not returned since his outburst after I told my family I do not want chemo. He nods understandingly. I slowly walk out and close the door behind me. As soon as I turn, I see Blake sitting on the steps.
I get a good look at his face after he turns towards me, and I notice a large bruise underneath his left eye. It's become so swollen that it looks like he can't even see out of it. My breath hitches.
Is that why he was running from the cops?
Is he in trouble with the law? Is he okay?
Stop Brynne. Stop worrying about him. My head is telling me to go back inside and forget that last night ever happened but my heart is telling me to sit down with Blake and listen to what he has to say.
I decide to hear him out. He motions for me to take a seat with his hand, and winces at the slight movement it has required. He grabs his side trying to hide the pain, but I notice instantly.
"What happened, Blake?"
He looks up at me with tired eyes. He looks like he hasn't slept since the last time I saw him. His hair is a mess, his shirt is halfway unbuttoned, his face is all banged up, and there are splotches of blood all over his shirt.
"You better make this quick. I don't want my neighbors to see anything." I blurt.
He sighs and looks into the sunset. I look at him. He's lost his childhood innocence. He's seen too much. Blake Wright is no longer the little boy I met. He's become a man.
"You know I would never put you in harm's way, right?" He questions harshly.
What does that even mean?
Harm's way?
"Yes?" I respond not knowing what to say to that.
I have not spoken to this man in four years, and the first day I see him, we almost get caught by the police. How am I supposed to trust him? How am I supposed to get rid of him? I know the more I talk to him, the more I will get attached, and the harder it will be to say goodbye. I try to be as emotionless with him as possible. I don't want to lead him on.
"Listen, Blake. I don't know what happened last night, but I don't want to have anything to do with it."
I see him slowly back away from me. It breaks my heart to see him hurt but, I know it's for the best. He shakes his head slowly and lifts his hand to his swollen cheek revealing his heavily bruised abs.
I gasp.
He's hurt badly. How is he still standing? I look at him with pity. He notices and looks away.
Don't look away, Blake.
Look at me.
"Look at me."
He turns his face towards me while clenching his jaw.
"What happened last night?" I ask.
I know I'll regret it, but I can't go another second in the dark.
"If I tell you, you have to promise not to tell anyone."
I can tell he's being serious. He doesn't trust people often.
"Okay," I say.
"A few months ago, my guys and I got into trouble with some other guys."
I already know this is not going to end well.
"We have the money to pay them back, but we just hate backing down from a fight."
Is he stupid or something?
"Last night when you saw me, I had just gotten out of a meeting that was strategy talk about how we are going to handle the situation."
He runs his fingers through his coarse black hair.
What kind of friend group has strategy meetings in the city at 3 a.m. and also has the money to pay back some random guys?
Something tells me that this isn't his "friend" group, that it's something bigger than that. But, I keep quiet and pretend like I'm the dumb blonde that everyone assumes me to be.
"I promise that no one saw you, and you're completely safe. I owe you one Brynne."
He rubs the back of his neck which, oddly turns me on.
Stop Brynne.
I can tell he gets up too quickly because he closes his eyes in agony, and has to hold on to the railing. Once he regains his balance, he walks to his car that I didn't even notice is parked in front of my house. I wish I could help him, but I promised myself I would stay out of trouble for the time being. Maybe I can keep him out of trouble.
It's the least I can do after my brother's attitude towards him the past couple of years.
"Wait Blake," I yell.
"I want to cash in that favor!"