NERI BECKONED me inside the gate. My mood lighten up as I inhaled the sweet smell of roses. May katiting na panghihinayang sa dibdib ko dahil hindi ko matanaw nang maayos ang ganda ng garden na nilalakaran namin dahil sa gabi na. Sigurado akong maganda dito kapag umaga. I like this place..
"So, what is he talking about? Why does he want you to wash your hands?" Tanong ni Neri habang naglalakad kami. I smiled wryly.
"I'm not sure about it, But that France guy kissed me on my hands. Well it's just a matter of introduction to me." Mahabang boses kong sabi. She flashed a wicked grin. What's going on her mind?
"Did he already told you that he likes you?" Tanong niya. Muntik na akong masamid sa sarili kong laway. How on earth can she ask that so directly?
"I don't believe him." Tipid na sabi ko saka diretsong tumingin sa harap.
"Why?"
"Because of some unavoidable circumstances," malamig na sabi ko. Mahina naman siyang nagreact pero hindi na nagtanong pa.
Nang makapasok na kami sa loob ay mas humanga ako. Hindi man ito kasinglaki ng villa nina Lucas, mas elegante naman ang loob nito. Halatang pinangangalagaan ng maayos.
Napatingin sa amin ang ilang bisita lalo na ang mga babae. Kinumusta ng ibang tao roon si Neri at hindi ko napigilang mahiya. I don't know anyone in this room besides Lucas, some of his friends and Neri.
Nagsilapitan naman ang ilang babae sa direksyon namin.
"Neri, it's so nice to see you," bati ng isang babaeng kulay puti ang buhok. I she dyed it. May pagkabluish kasi ang buhok niya kahit mostly ay puti.
"Oh, Rish, It's so nice to see you too. By the way this is Lucas' fiancee-to-be, Loraine Cruz." Pakilala ni Neri sa akin. Napangiti naman ang babae sa akin saka inalok ang kanyang kamay.
"So you're that Loraine that everyone's talking about. You're very pretty in person. I'm Irish Helga, boyfriend ko si Dion." Nakangiting pakilala niya sa sarili. Medyo nagulat pa ako dahil hindi ko alam na may girlfriend pala si Dion. At isa pa, am I that popular with them? Bakit parang lahat ng babae dito ay alam ang pangalan ko?
"Sa totoo lang, madalas ka talagang topic ng mga girls in the same circle dahil kay Monique Devan and Andrea Cruz. Hindi ka madalas na umaattend ng mga social gatherings pero palagi kang nab-bring up sa usapan." Pagkukuwento ni Neri ng matunugan ang pagtataka sa mukha ko. I mentally cursed my Mom. How can she be so sure that her daughter and her best friend's son will end up together?
"Why?" Tanong kong muli. Napatawa nalang silang dalawa.
"I heard you're pretty sharp and brilliant. Sa totoo lang, maganda ka talaga, not to mention, powerful rin ang pamilya niyo. Maraming parents mula sa well-off family ang may gustong maipagkasundo ka sa mga anak nilang lalaki. Nakakagulat lang at parang hindi mo yun alam." Sabi ni Irish. Nanlulumo along napabuntong-hininga.
That's true. I don't have any idea.
"Mom didn't tell me," nasabi ko nalang.
"By the way, is it true that you and Khalil were dating? I heard from some of my colleagues that the two of you seems to be pretty close to each other." Sabi niya.
Kumunot naman ang noo ko. Seriously? Hindi pa nga tapos ang issue tungkol sa engagement 'kuno' namin ni Lucas, yung kay Kali naman ang inuungkat nila. Goddamn it. This is why I so hate being a socialite.
"We're not dating. Khalil is just my best friend," pilit ngiting tugon ko. Halata naman ang gulat sa mga mukha nila. Why? Are they expecting me to say that I'm dating my best friend?
"Oh, I see. Don't get me wrong, ah. Madami kasing rumors about sa inyo." Sabi ni Irish. I just smiled at her.
"Those were just baseless rumors. Hindi ko lang alam kung paanong kumalat ang walang kwentang tsismis na 'yon." Nakangising sabi ko. Biglang naging seryoso ang dalawa saka lumapit sa akin. Naging mahina rin ang pagsasalita nila saka tumingin sa paligid para tingnan kung may ibang nakikinig.
"Alam mo ba, may rumors rin about sa akin noon sa Florida na dinedate ko raw yung prof ko. Those bitches who befriended me for fame! Like duh! I cant even remember the name of my proffesor! Buti nalang talaga nandito na ako ngayon sa Pilipinas. If I have ever given a chance to meet those wenches again, I will definitely get them! I became too easy on them before because I thought they're pitiful and suffering enough." Mahinang bulong ni Neri sa sarili. Nakakaintinding tumango naman si Irish sa kanya.
"I feel you, girl. Sa school na pinapasukan ko, ang pinsan ko lang na si Pamela ang madalas na sinasamahan ko. Someone tried to befriend me before, and it was so fantastic at first! Not until that one started to spread crazy rumors about me. And mind you, that thing dared to stole 20 thousand cash in my wallet!" Kwento ni Irish. Napa-iling nalang ako sa kwento niya. Ganon nga talaga siguro kapag naggaling ka sa makapangyarihang pamilya, maraming mga lalapit lang sa'yo para gamitin ka at ang posisyon mo sa buhay para makaangat sila sa buhay o makakuha ng atensyon. Famewhore bitches.
Napatingin naman kami ni Irish kay Neri nang tumikhim siya.
"What about you, Loraine? Never ka bang nilapitan ng kahit na sino para gamitin ang pera at pangalan mo?" Tanong ni Irish. Curious ring napatingin si Neri sa akin.
Walang emosyon naman akong tumingin sa kanila. "They could try to come and use me.." sabi ko saka nag-iwas ng tingin. "...but it would be a very bad idea unless they live near a hospital," mahinang dugtong ko. Napatawa naman ang dalawa.
"So badass," papuri ni Irish.
"It's not about being cool or badass. I just don't want people to step over me." Sabi ko. Nakangiti lang akong tiningnan ng dalawa. Neri suddenly cling on my left arm while Irish cling to my right. They both giggled and looked at each other knowingly.
"You know what, Loraine. I like you! Let's be friends!" Masayang sabi ni Neri.
"I know right. She's too amazing. Magaling talaga akong pumili ng kakaibiganin." Mayabang na sabi ni Neri.
Napabuntong-hininga nalang ako. I've never had any girl friends. Never in this lifetime and not even in my past life.
"Are you sure about this?" Tanong ko. Ngumiti lang sila sa akin.
"Of course we are so sure! So much we'd even risk our backs suffering from a deadly piercing glare." Irish said sweetly. Neri laughed at her. Pasimple akong tumingin sa likod namin. There he is! Couple of guys including Dion was on their group. Some of 'em were laughing as they talk about something but Lucas obviously aren't listening since he's busy glaring at us.
"Uh, don't mind him," sabi ko nalang.
"Are you really sure that you don't wanna be his fiancee?" Tanong ni Neri. Tiningnan ko lang siya. "Like, for real? Halata kasing patay na patay sa'yo si Devan eh." Natatawa pang sabi niya. Napaikot nalang ako ng mata.
"I can't be his fiancee or even his girlfriend, " mahinang sabi ko. Nagtataka naman nila akong tiningnan.
"Why not? Sa tingin ko naman, mukhang kaya mong baguhin si Lucas. He looks like he'll kill us. Maybe he wanted to spend more time with you," inosenteng sabi ni Irish habang nilalaro ng daliri ang puting buhok.
"Well, I don't know." Napabuntong-hininga nalang ako. "I just think that he's not the right one for me." Kibit balikat kong sabi.
"You just think he's not the right one for you, but how about what you feel? Do you really not feel anything towards him?" Nakangising tanong ni Neri. I can feel myself getting caught off guard. I really like Neri just a few moments ago, but why'd she have to ask that?
Hindi ako nagpahalata saka muling nagkibit ng balikat. "No, I don't think really think that we're going to click... that way. And I hate guys like him," diretso kong sabi.
"Really? Then what kind of guy do you like, Claudia?"
Muntik na akong mapatalon nang marinig ko ang boses ni Lucas sa likuran namin. Bakas rin ang pagkagulat kay Irish na mabilis na nakabawi. Si Neri naman ay nakangisi lang.
"Hon," sabi ni Irish saka yumakap kay Dion na nasa harap na rin namin.
"You good?" Tanong ni Dion kay Irish saka ginantihan ng yakap ang babae. Tumango lang si Irish. Ngumiti naman si Dion saka hinalikan si Irish sa labi. Wtf?
Okay. That was a sweet gesture. But holy freak! Why do they have to do it in front of us? That is just so awkward! To think nandito rin si Lucas, naaalala ko lang yung nangyari kanina sa parking lot! And Neri... Where the heck is Neri? How did she disappear in mid-air?
Naramdaman ko ang paghawak ni Lucas sa kamay ko. Parang may kilabot na gumapang mula roon. Napalunok ako. Naaalala ko pa din ang mga pinagsasabi niya sa parking lot kanina. I think I can't forget it even if I ever had an amnesia. Tiningnan ko siya at wala siyang emosyon na nakatingin sa akin. I averted my eyes and.. seriously?
Neri, who suddenly disappeared, is now in the center of the room busy kissing a... guy? I swear the back of that guy is so familiar! I saw other people and most of them are kissing! What kind of birthday party is it? Is this some kind of game where everyone who participates needs to copy the birthday celebrant? Aren't they aware of PDA?
Dion was almost eating Irish lips. Ugh! Dang it! Binawi ko ang kamay ko mula kay Lucas saka umalis. Maybe, I'll just go in the garden. Mamaya nalang ako babalik kapag bumalik na sa normal ang mga tao roon.
Umupo ako sa bench malapit sa fountain. It was a majestic sight. may ilaw sa ilalim kaya kitang kita kung gaano iyon kaganda. Malamig ang simoy ng hangin roon. Just how I always like when it's night.
"So you hate PDA, huh. You'd rather do it in private?"
Nanlaki ang mata ko nang marinig na naman ang boses ni Lucas. Biglang kumabog ang dibdib ko. How can I not? We're just alone here!
"W-Why did you follow me?" Naiinis kong sabi. Tumingin lang siya sa fountain saka umupo sa tabi ko. Napatungo lang ako saka nagsalubong ang kilay habang naaalala na naman ang mga sinabi niya.
"I meant what I said earlier. I like you," mahina niyang sabi. Kumuyom ng kusa ang mga kamao ko.
"Just stop." mababang boses kong sabi. Tumayo ako saka humarap sa kanya. "Stop it, Lucas. Kaya kong kalimutan ang lahat ng sinabi mo ngayon kaya... Tigilan mo na. Don't even dare of mentioning about it again." Matigas kong sabi saka umalis.
Naglakad ako papalayo sa fountain papunta sa mga mapunong bahagi ng lugar. Kung tutuusin medyo malayo na iyon sa mansyon. I stopped at a tree and sat under it. The moon is breath-taking beautiful tonight, but for some reason I can't appreciate it.
Napapikit ako. Bakit kailangang mas maging mahirap ang lahat? Is fate finally getting back at me for messing up the storyline?
Olivia and Lucas are meant to each other.
There's no way I can change that. Kahit ang nararamdaman ko, hindi ko kayang baguhin. I feel like the original Loraine and me are being merge into one. No way.
I need to protect myself, that's why I can't accept Lucas' feelings. I'm just phase. Sigurado akong lilipas rin ang nararamdaman niya para sa'kin, if ever he's saying the truth.
Mai-in-love si Lucas kay Olivia sa pangalawa nilang pagkikita, which will be at my cousin's birthday. Olivia is already interested in Lucas, and she'll also start having feelings for him a few days after the wedding reception of my cousin.
Why is it so painful? I don't think I can ever stand seeing them with each other. Why?
He's never done a good thing for me, and he never even treated me like a princess. He's always harsh, cold, and emotionless freak. He's not gentle. He kissed me without my permission and he's so rude. We're only living together for barely a month but what the heck? How can I be like this?
Is this how the original Loraine felt? Is this her feelings right now? Why do I have to feel it, then? Even though I know what will happen. Why can't I stop it?
Napabuntong-hininga nalang ako. Why is it so hard? Just when did I start feeling this way? I hate it.
"You know, I'm excited for this party because I got a chance to tease you, but why the hell are you crying?"
Nanlaki ang mga mata ko nang mapakinggan ang napakapamilyar na boses. Nag-angat ako ng tingin saka tuluyang naramdaman ang pamamasa ng mata at pisngi ko.
"Y-You," nauwi sa paghikbi ang maraming bagay na gusto kong sabihin.
"U-huh." Nakangiting sabi niya.
Mabilis akong tumayo at yumakap sa kanya.
"Y-You came..." Mahinang ani ko. Ramdam ko ang pagganti niya sa yakap ko. Matunog siyang ngumisi.
"Long time no see, witch."