Lin Xun seriously thought about this question.
After thinking, he smiled. "How could I...."
Dong Jun, "Hum?"
Lin Xun said, "I am not the kind of person who can commit suicide."
He looked at Dong Jun's eyes and said, "Look, now I am with you, there is no need to commit suicide. I have no reason to kill myself. If one day we are no longer together, I may become a little sad."
"But it wouldn't be to the extent that I would want to commit suicide." He pursed his lips. "There are still many friends—Anquan and Jiagou are living well, and my sister, I can't do that kind of thing, you know, choosing to die."
Dong Jun looked at him without blinking. "What else?"
"If one day, all of you are gone, and I have no one else to contact in this world," Lin Xun smiled at this point, "Then I can just write algorithms; I still have Luo Shen. Or just give me a computer, I think I can live a good life for the rest of my life."
He continued, "Only the kind of people who have lost all reason and have become completely disheartened, and perhaps those who have been hit the hardest will commit suicide. It is impossible for me. I always have other things to do."
But Dong Jun asked again, "Then what do you hate?"
"I...I don't have anything in particular that I dislike." Lin Xun thought as he said, "I'm a very active person, and I'm in a good state of mind."
"But it seems that since I was young, I didn't like others to control me." He added.
Dong Jun, "You prefer being unconstrained?"
Lin Xun, "Kind of."
He leaned down, rubbed against Dong Jun, and stroked Dong Jun's hair in the same way Dong Jun would usually stroke his. "Anyway, I don't have any psychological problems."
There seemed to be a trace of loneliness in Dong Jun's eyes.
Lin Xun thought, that the person in front of him had lost an especially important person.
Maybe it was his mother, maybe it was Lo; it didn't matter anymore, he wouldn't let this happen again anyway.
He hugged Dong Jun. "Unless you don't want to play with me, I definitely won't leave."
Dong Jun pulled Lin Xun's finger to his lips. "Really?"
Lin Xun, "Yes."
As he said this, he reached out and touched Dong Jun's lips. It was a little bit cold but was very soft.
The next moment, Dong Jun parted his lips a bit, and gently sucked Lin Xun's finger. Lin Xun felt something touch his fingertip; he lowered his head and was stunned by what he saw.
"Don't be too proficient, I can't stand it a bit." He wanted to pull his hand back, but Dong Jun held his wrist firmly.
Dong Jun smiled slightly, and touched Lin Xun's fingertips with his lips, then moved upwards and turned to the back of Lin Xun's hand. He was extremely focused, like a butterfly kissing a rose.
A slight itch came from Lin Xun's nerve endings, and his scalp felt numb.
It was not until Dong Jun finished kissing every inch of Lin Xun's hand that he raised his head and opened his arms to Lin Xun.
Of course, being the well-informed and considerate person that he was, Lin Xun leaned in to give Dong Jun a hug.
Dong Jun's voice was slightly deep. "You are so obedient."
Lin Xun, "I'm the most obedient."
Dong Jun laughed.
Lin Xun broke away again and looked at Dong Jun's expression.
Dong Jun, "What's wrong?"
Lin Xun still cared a little in his mind, so he asked, "Have you ever been like this with anyone else?"
Dong Jun, "No."
Lin Xun, "Really? You haven't?"
Anyway, since he had already asked about Lo today, and his image of being a Lemon had been completely exposed for Dong Jun to see, it was better to take the opportunity to ask all the questions.
"No." The smile in Dong Jun's eyes was very gentle. "Only you."
"Then I'll believe it for the time being." Lin Xun whispered.
Dong Jun looked into his eyes. "For the time being?"
Lin Xun, "What if you lied to me?"
Dong Jun's fingers slid across the side of Lin Xun's face; his eyes were like a bottomless pool of water, but there was a faint light that was as brilliant as the stars. He spoke very slowly, "I will never lie to you."
The statement had been spoken with such solemnity that it was beyond Lin Xun's expectation. If they were not in this setting, he almost would have thought that Dong Jun was making an oath.
And he really believed it.
It was not because of how well-founded this sentence was, or how convincing Dong Jun's tone was.
It was just, when faced with such a person with such a look, no matter what he said, you would believe it.
He buried himself in Dong Jun's arms again. Dong Jun's arms were wrapped around his shoulders. At first, the strength of Dong Jun's embrace was quite strong, but before Lin Xun even felt pain, Dong Jun slowly relaxed, and in the end, just held Lin Xun gently.
Lin Xun took a breath and felt that he had finally figured out what Dong Jun wanted.
Dong Jun was probably a very insecure person, so he would want to hold on to something tightly. At that time when Xue Xin had called him, and Dong Jun had heard them, the man didn't even let him continue his conversation with Xue Xin. Just a few days ago, when he injured his leg outside, Dong Jun said to the doctor that he would break Lin Xun's leg if he tried to sneak out again—his tone couldn't be more serious.
But in these past few days of getting along, it was apparent that Dong Jun did not express this kind of insecurity. He was like the perfect lover—considerate, gentle, and would indulge you as if he didn't have a bottom line. Lin Xun thought that this was not true. Dong Jun wasn't really such a person. A programmer's code was like a painter's masterpiece, and anyone who had seen Dong Jun's code would realize that he wasn't a gentle and easygoing person.
"If you feel insecure, you can hold me tighter," Lin Xun said to him, "I won't be afraid."
Dong Jun's arms tightened slightly. "Don't you like freedom?"
"It depends on the situation." Lin Xun said, "You can hold me as tight as you want, really. It's okay if you want to shut me away, just leave me a computer. Fans like myself have never had a bottom line when it comes to the male god——"
He couldn't finish his words, because Dong Jun's right hand clasped his neck.
Lin Xun, whose throat was grasped, could only be at the mercy of others, and was pressed by Dong Jun underneath, and then fascinated by Dong Jun's kiss.
He was powerless. After he was finally let go, teetering at the edge of death due to lack of oxygen, he panted very quickly, but he was pulled up again; his five fingers were stretched and pressed against the pillow, the skin on his neck was bitten heavily—not a kiss, but a bite. He finally realized that he should not irritate Dong Jun that much.
"I was wrong." He was not only very obedient, but also very good at admitting mistakes. "I don't have a bottom line, but you can't be so fierce to me. I like to be treated gently. You let me go this time, we can discuss it again. Male god...Dong Jun...brother..."
Invalid.
The collar of his pajamas had been pulled apart, and other parts of his body had also been held down.
He wondered why he had called Dong Jun brother—it was useless either way; should he have called him father?
——That would be impossible, he really wouldn't be able to say it out loud.
A wise man submits to circumstances. After Lin Xun realized that he could not escape, he softened his body, groaned and pulled at the neckline of Dong Jun's shirt.
Dong Jun's hair fell down, sweeping on the side of Lin Xun's neck—it was a little itchy; he pulled it away and raised his head to meet Dong Jun's gaze.
The moon had already reached its culmination, and the moonlight was brighter than before. The outer corner of Dong Jun's eyes—perhaps it was from inside of his eyes, just behind his pupils—had a little red dot, which gave his facial features a trace of something sinister. And the expression in his eyes were so deep, that if they ever obtained a material existence, Lin Xun felt that he would now be firmly bound by a few chains. He couldn't stand it anymore; he looked down and saw the strong and beautiful lines of Dong Jun's chest, undulating with Dong Jun's every breath; it was so seductive, that even though he wanted to look away, he couldn't. Finally, he closed his eyes, raised his head, and asked for a kiss.
This time, the kiss was very gentle.
And then...he was let go and carefully placed where he should be—he only needed to feel a little sleepy and he would have fallen asleep perfectly.
Lin Xun, "?"
He opened his eyes and expressed his doubts.
He saw Dong Jun slowly buttoning up his buttons, his movements were horribly elegant and calm.
"So much for today." Dong Jun said lightly, his voice was a little hoarse. "Wait for your leg to heal."
Lin Xun grabbed the pillow on the side and said, "So you indeed want me to kneel."
Dong Jun smiled slightly and lay down peacefully, holding Lin Xun's shoulders as if nothing had happened just now. "You will still use your knees, except it won't be to kneel."
Lin Xun, "..."
He found that he had repeatedly underestimated this man.
What happened tonight reminded him of a chicken soup story that was very widespread.
Put a person who wants to eat candy and a candy in the same room; if he can resist not eating it for an hour, he will get two pieces of candy after an hour.
If you were this person, would you choose to eat a piece of candy right then or hold back for an opportunity to eat two pieces after an hour?
"Dong Jun is obviously the latter.
"Very good, you're really terrific."