I stood there staring at the group of Hogwarts students with my heart beating so hard, it felt like it was about to jump right out of my chest. I closed my eyes and took a few deep breaths before I ended up freezing the entire bar over. I was vaguely aware of Cedric wrapping his arms around my waist in a bid to calm me down but I knew it was something I needed to do for myself.
Admitting out loud to how many people I had killed was not something I had ever wanted to do. It was something that haunted me in my very worst nightmares. The only person who truly understood what I felt was Dad. He did things that he couldn't speak of during the war, just like most of the soldiers who fight in wars. But at the end of the day, you do what you have do to defend your own.
Authors note: Yes, that was a quote from Keith Urban's song for you. What can I say, I love country music! And Keith Urban, but I am Aussie so that's kind of a given. Fair warning, more Taylor Swift lyrics quotes are coming up in this chapter as well.
When I opened my eyes, I saw that none of the student's had left. Cassy was smiling a sad smile at me, knowing to a point what I was going through. Luckily for her, she had never had to do what I did with the helicarrier that day in Washington but she had been in the position where it was killed or be killed. So, she knew what it was to take the life of another, which was something this group of kids needed to understand.
"Taking a life is never easy," I said in a softer tone than I was using only moments before and breaking the silence that had fallen over the room. "But in that moment, you don't have a choice and that is something all of you need to understand before diving head first into everything. Because at the end of the day, this will end up as a war. Admittedly, a war that neither Cassy or I have ever fought but a war never the less. You have to understand that it's not about what a single person can do but what you can do with the people you sever with. There is a saying that my dad told me about when he was fighting in World War 2, 'With you I serve, with you I fall down. Watch your breath in, watch you breathing out'. They are also lyrics from a song. It means you have to learn to rely on the person fighting next to you but worst of all, you have to be prepared to watch that person take their last breath and to comfort them as it happens. So, I meant what I said before, if you aren't ready for what this road leads too, I suggest you leave now and forget that you ever considered coming to this meeting today."
"Elsa's right," Cassy said, picking up where I left off. "I haven't been in as many life-or-death situations as Elsa has but I have had to watch someone I care about take his last breath. His name was Pietro Maximoff. He was one of the most stubborn people I have ever met but he was also funny and kind and he was a loving brother to his twin sister, Wanda. This will end in a war; I have no doubt about that and it won't be easy. But in saying that, if you are willing to fight, to serve as Elsa said, alongside each other, both Elsa and I will be more than happy to teach you to fight in ways that you won't be taught at Hogwarts, even with a competent DA teacher. We can teach you hand to hand combat and fair warning, even without any of her magic Elsa will kick your ass. We can also teach you stealth, sabotage and espionage. But that's solely up to you."
"Elsa and Cassy are right. You don't do these types of things on your own," Harry said. "I'm not trying to sound modest but I had a lot of help with all that stuff I did."
"Not with the dragon, you didn't and neither did Cedric," one of the Ravenclaw boys pointed out.
"Well, kind of," Cedric chuckled looking down at me, remembering how I helped him prepare for each of the tasks.
"And Harry, nobody helped you get rid of those dementors this summer," Susan said.
"No, no," Harry said, sounding like he was getting more than a little frustrated. "Well, maybe. I know I did bits of it without help but the point I'm trying to make..."
"Are you trying to weasel out of showing us any of this stuff?" Zacharias said, interrupting Harry.
"Last warning, Smith. Speak out of turn one time and I well stand you down for the team," Cedric warned.
"Here's an idea," Ron said loudly as Harry was about to start talking again. "Why don't you shut your mouth."
"Well, we've all turned up to learn from him, and now he's telling us that he can't really do any of it," Zacharias said pompously.
"Your stood down for a game, Smith. You were warned," Cedric told Zacharias, causing the boy to look at his quidditch captain with a look of outrage.
"Besides, that's not what Harry said," Fred snapped at him.
"Would you like us to clean out your ears for you?" George said sarcastically as he pulled out a long, thin and dangerous bit of metal from his Zonko's bag.
"Or any part of your body, really, we're not fussy where we stick this," Fred added.
Zacharias looked at the metal rod with a small amount of fear on his face as he fidgeted nervously in his seat. Fred and George continued to smile at him with a wicked look on their identical faces, making me shudder at what was going through the twin's mind. But honestly, whatever they had planned most like wasn't as bad as they were making it out to be.
"Yes, well," Hermione said quickly, trying to move on from the twin's little threat. "Moving on...the point is, are we all agreed we want to take lessons from Harry, as well as Elsa and Cassy if they are willing?"
There was a murmur of agreement around the room as everyone agreed with Hermione. I looked over at Cassy, silently asking her if she was up to putting a bunch of magical kids through muggle, Avengers training which Cassy answered with a smile and a nod. Looking around the room, it was hard to picture most of the people learning how to actually fight but I was a Rogers and we never backed down from a challenge.
"Right," Hermione said with a look of relief on her face. "Well, then, the next question is how often we should meet up. I really don't think there is any point in meeting once a week."
"Hang on, we need to make sure it doesn't clash with our quidditch practice," Angelina pointed out.
"Or ours," Hamish added.
"No, nor with ours," Cho said.
"I'm sure we can find a night that suits everyone," Hermione assured everyone but still sounding a little frustrated that people seemed to find quidditch more important. "But you know, this is rather important, we're learning how to defend ourselves against V-Voldemort's death eaters."
"Well said!" Ernie said, speaking up for what surprisingly was the first time. "I, personally am at a loss to see the ministry has foisted such a useless teacher upon us at this critical period. Obviously, they are in denial about the return of You Know Who, but to give us a teacher who is trying to actively prevent us from using defensive spells!"
"We think the reason Umbridge doesn't want us trained in defense against the dark arts is she got some mad idea that Dumbledore could use the students in the school as a kind of private army. She thinks that he'd mobilise us against the ministry," Hermione explained, telling them in what was my opinion a little too much.
"Well, that makes sense," Luna said in her usual dreamy voice. "After all, Cornelius Fudge has his got his own private army."
"What?" Harry asked, looking at Luna like she had suddenly started speaking another language.
"Yes, he's got an army of heliopaths," Luna explained, bringing up the imaginary creature that didn't exists.
"No, he hasn't," Hermione snapped at her.
"Yes, he has," Luna said, sounding a little less dreamy as she tried to prove her point.
"What are heliopaths?" Neville asked nervously.
"They're spirts of fire," Luna told Neville, her eyes growing wider the more she spoke about the imaginary creature. "Great tall flaming creatures that gallop across the ground, burning everything in front..."
"They do not exist, Neville," Hermione snapped.
"Oh, yes they do!" Luna said, sounding angry for the first time.
"I'm sorry but where's the proof of that?" Hermione asked sarcastically.
"There are plenty of eyewitness accounts, just because you're so narrow minded you need to have everything shoved under your nose before you..."
"Okay guys, time out!" Cassy said, pushing herself off the wall she was leaning on and standing between the two fighting girls.
"Look, I'm not saying that heliopath's do or do not exist," I said as I tried to reason with the two girls. "But all I'm saying is that I've seen creatures that people wouldn't believe existed throughout the realms. I mean have any of you heard of bilchsnipe's and Cassy, don't answer that one. Yeah, I didn't think so."
When I finished talking, Luna looked up at me with a brilliant smile on her face, happy that someone wasn't calling her loony for once. Hermione of the other hand just rolled her eyes and continued to talk about the meetings. After it was agreed that they wouldn't interfere with anyone's quidditch practice and Hermione promising that she would find a place for the meetings to take place, she rummaged through her bag and pulled out a bit of parchment and a quill.
"I think everybody should write their names down, just so we know who was here. But I also think that we all ought to agree not to shout what we're doing. So, if you sign, you're agreeing not to tell Umbridge or anyone else what we're up to," Hermione said, as Fred happily took the quill and signed his name.
"Er, well... I'm sure Ernie will tell me when the meeting is," Zacharias said nervously, looking at Ernie who looked equally as nervous.
"I, well, we are prefects," Ernie said all at once. "And if this list was found...well, I mean to say...you said it yourself, if Umbridge found out..."
"Ernie, Elsa and I are head boy and girl and we don't have a problem with signing it," Cedric said as he signed his name.
"So, in other words, suck it up, buttercup," Cassy said as she glared at the fifth year Hufflepuff and snatching the quill out of Cedric hand and signing her name then passing it to me.
Slowly everyone in the room started to sign the parchment in promise that they wouldn't tell Umbridge. As I watched everyone line up to add their names to the list, I could help but feel a wave of giddy excitement wash over me as I wondered if this was what Dad felt like as he asked his friends to join the Howling Commando's. So enough everyone had signed up to our little rag tag group and I felt like maybe we were going to be able to actually make a difference in this world.
Keep your helmet, keep your life, son
Just a flesh wound, here's your rifle
I woke up to familiar words echoing in my head but in unfamiliar surroundings. Cautiously, I stood up to get my baring's and saw that I seemed to be on some sort of World War 2 troop carrier. I had no idea how I got there or in the army fatigues that I somehow ended up dressed in.
"Okay men," A man I knew to be Captain Steve Rogers, better known as Captain America said as he looks over at me and smiled. "And women. This isn't going to be easy, no one said it would be. That beach it heavily guarded and the jerries aren't about to give it up easily. But that doesn't mean we can't do it! I have faith in each and every one of you. Just remember keep your rifle close and your friends closer."
After finishing his speech, the captain let the men go off and do their thing before, what I assumed, storming the beach. I racked my brain trying to remember how I got here or what was going on but everything just seemed to be a blur. I knew the man known as Captain America was more to me than my ranking officer but I just didn't know what it was. I sunk down on to the ground and held my head in my hands. There was a small part of my brain was telling me this wasn't real, but it felt real. I just couldn't figure out what was going on.
"Are you alright Lieutenant Odinson," the captain asked me, making me wonder why in the nine realms he was referring to me by what I knew was my Mum's maiden name but what the really question was, what WAS my actual last name. "I know this is your first time working on the front lines as a medic and I know people are questioning why I agreed to let a girl join our squadron but I want you to know that I think you are the best damn medic I have ever seen and I know you won't let me down."
"Uh, thank you...Captain," I said, standing at attention and quickly own to see the red cross armband wrapped around my arm, signaling to everyone that I was a medic.
"At ease, Lieutenant," he said smiling down at me with a very familiar smile on his face but I didn't know why it was familiar.
"But just so know, if we all die, it's on your head," a voice said, making its way through the crowd of men.
"Buck, leave the girl alone," Captain Rogers said to the man who was now standing next to him. Somewhere in the back of my mind I knew the man with dark hair and a cheeky smile was Sargent James Buchanan Barnes. Not that anyone actually called him that, he was known as Bucky.
"She knows I'm kidding, don't you shorty," Bucky laughed as he ruffled my hair.
"It's alright Sir," I said, trying to understand why I felt like I knew the pair of men. "I know Sargent Barnes is joking. But if you don't mind, I'm just going to check my supplies one last time before landing."
With a quick salute, I waked over to where I woke up so find my pathetic little excuse of a first aid kit sitting next to a M-1 helmet with a red cross painted on the front and a M1911A1 .45 automatic pistol which I assumed were mine.
Kneeling down to get my kit, I racked my brain trying to figure out how I got here and what the last thing I remembered was. But it was like the memories were just out of reach and every time I tried to grab hold of them, they disappeared. I could remember a boy's face, his grey eyes and kind smile that made me feel like I had butterflies in my stomach.
But I knew I needed to push the feeling aside, the men who were with me on the troop carrier lives depended on it. So tried to forget the feeling that was nagging at me and check my kit to make sure everything was in it. I check everything off in the list in my mind; 1 adhesive plaster that was 1 inch by five yards, bandage scissors, 2 medium safety pins, boric acid ointment for burn injuries, eye dressing set, iodine swab, 16 adhesive gauze bandages that were 1 inch by 3 inch, 72 compressed gauze bandages that were 3 inch by 6 yards that were stored in a metal container, 3 compressed triangular bandages, 1 field tourniquet, 8 small first aid dressings, 1 emergency tag booklet with 20 emergency medical tags in it and 1 trusty lead pencil.
Sighing, I repacked my meager kit. It wasn't much but it was all I had to help me save the men who fighting to keep the world safe. Just as I had finished packing my kit, the feeling of the carrier stopping shock under my feet.
"Okay men, move out!" Captain Rogers called as the back of the carrier opened on to the beach.
I hung back and let the soldiers exit the carrier first. No one needed a medic getting in their way while they were storming a beach. The moment the coast was clear, I followed the men out and into the water. The feeling of the icy cold water stung as is soaked through my uniform and once again that voice in the back of my head told me that it wasn't normal, that I shouldn't be feeling the cold. But I pushed it aside and continued to make my way through the waist deep water and on to the beach.
As soon as I was on the shore, my heavy combat boots started to sink in to the sand and making it hard to move. But I wouldn't let a little sand stop me from doing my job, even if it did get everywhere. Knowing that the last thing that the men needed was to have to look out for a green medic, I started to make my way over to a large boulder where I could watch for men who need my help.
I watched as the men made their way up the beach through heavy fire but never flinching, never stopping as they ran to what could be their death. In the distance I could see Bucky set up his rifle and start to pick off the enemy one by one. Every time it looked like one out our guys was about to look death in the eye, Bucky saved them so they could fight a little bit longer.
"MEDIC!" I heard one of the soldiers call out. "We need a medic over here!"
Making sure I had my pistol in its holster, I grabbed my kit and started running across the beach. Dogging running soldiers as they crawled their way up the beach, I tried to make my way over to the injured man as quickly as I could. But I was stopped in my tracks by an explosion that rocked the beach. Closing my eyes, I braced myself as much as I could from the blast.
I didn't know how long I was out or if I was knocked out at all. But all I knew was when I opened my eyes the whole world was spinning and there was a ringing in my ears that didn't seem to want to go away. I tried to get to my feet but stumble back into the sand. The next thing I knew there was a hand in front of me, offering to help me to my feet.
"On your feet Lieutenant," Captain Rogers said as he helped me stand up. "Let's make sure that you get to that injured soldier safely."
I followed the captain across the beach to where the injured man was lying on the ground with one of his friends kneeling next to him. After ensuring the captain I would be fine, I knelt down and turned the soldier over. When I looked at him, I saw that he was just a boy with bright red hair and freckles that covered his face. When I looked up at his friend with black hair and round glasses, I had no doubt they faked their age to enlist. Looking at the boy's dog tags, I saw that his name was Ronald B. Weasley.
"Please, you have to help him. He's my best friend and he's all I've got," the dark-haired boy pleaded with me.
"I promise, I'll do the best I can."
I gently turned the soldier so I could get to the wound on his shoulder but as soon as I pulled back his shirt, I knew that it wasn't good. From what I could see, the bullet had struck his brachial artery and he was losing blood fast.
"Hey there, Ron. My name's Elsa, I'm a medic and I'm going to do what I can to help you okay," I said as I rummaged through my kit
I cursed at my lack of supplies as I fumbled with one of the pressure bandages. With shaking hands, I cut a part of the bandage off and pressed it on to the wound in an attempt to stem the bleeding. But within seconds the bandage and my hands were covered in the boy's blood.
"What's your name?" I asked the boy with dark hair as I applied more pressure to the wound.
"Harry, my name is Harry."
"Harry, I need you to do me a favor. I need you to keep pressure right here, where I have my hands. Can you do that for me?" I asked him.
"Yeah, I can," Harry said in a shaky voice.
"Good, now I need you to place your hands right here," I said, guiding his hands over the wound making Ron groan in pain.
When I was sure that Harry's hands were in the right spot, I rummaged through the kit again to get a clean bandage. I knew it wasn't going to do much, but I need to pack the wound and bandage it, if the boy had any chance of making it to a field hospital. But after I packed the wound and started to bandage it, blood soaked through them once again as Ron's breaths started to falter. I knew what that meant but there was no way in hell I was giving up on the boy. Looking up I saw that Captain Rogers was still close by and I knew he was my best bet of getting the boy to safety.
"Captain Rogers! Sir, he's bleeding out! I need your help!"
Crawling up the beaches now
"Sir, I think he's bleeding out"
And some things you just can't speak about
I heard the familiar words echo through my mind again, but I tried to ignore them because there were more important things to be worrying about. The captain came to my aid as soon as he heard me call out. Before I knew it, the captain was at my side, helping me with the boy.
"Son, can you hear me?" he asked the boy, taking hold of his shoulders. "Son!"
With you, I serve
With you, I fall down, down
Watch you breathe in
Watch you breathing out, out
I watched as the captain's posture slump as he let go of the boys' shoulders and close his eyes. In that second, I forgot how to breath. I had failed to do the one thing I was on that beach for, I couldn't save him. I looked down at the boy's lifeless body feeling like I was in nightmare. I could hear the other boy, Harry, scream as he realised that his best friend was dead. But I didn't have time to wallow in my own self-pity because the next thing I knew there was someone else calling out for a medic.
And that's how it continued for what felt like forever. Someone of the men I could save, while others were too far gone. Eventually everything grew quiet as we managed to force the enemy back behind the line. Which meant we had an ever so brief moment of relief.
"Lieutenant, you need to rest. Even if it's just for twenty minutes," Captain Rogers told me as I sat in the sand, looking at the blood that stained my hands. "And no arguing."
The next thing I knew, the captain was helping me to my feet and to a group of make shift tents that had been hastily put up. Gently he led to one of the smaller tents where there were two cots set up, one of which had someone sitting on it.
"Lieutenant Odinson this is Lieutenant Diggory, he's a fellow medic," Captain Rogers said, introducing me to the person who I would be sharing the tent with. "Diggory, make sure she gets some sleep. She's had a rough day."
"Come on, love. I'll make sure you are safe," my fellow medic said as he looked up at me with grey eyes, the very same eyes that I had remembered before the battle started.
Not having the strength to argue as Captain Rogers left me in the capable hand of Lieutenant Diggory, I let him lead me to one of the cots so that I could lay down. I didn't know why but I felt safe with him, so when my head hit the pillow, still with my helmet on, I had no problem to getting what little amount of sleep I could get.
Only 20 minutes to sleep
But you dream of some epiphany
Just one single glimpse of relief
To make some sense of what you've seen
The next thing I knew I was standing back in the middle of the beach again but there was no one around and it was far too quiet for my liking. Slowly a figure came in to view, shrouded in a golden haze. When the figure got closer to me, I could see it was a woman. She had dark skin and chocolate coloured hair but what stood out about her most was her golden eyes and kind smile.
"It doesn't have to end this way, child," she said as she gently pushed the blood covered curls out of my face and back under my helmet. "Always remember, you are stronger as a team. You need to remind them of that because that's how you will all make it out alive. But more importantly, never forget you are strong and brave. Always do what is right and follow your heart."
Only 20 minutes to sleep
But you dream of some epiphany
Just one single glimpse of relief
To make some sense of what you've seen
That's when it hit me, fighting didn't mean anything if you weren't fighting for something you believed in. I took my helmet off and looked at the red cross which stood out against the muted green of the metal. She was right, we would always be stronger as a team.
"Elsa, love, it's time to wake up."
I looked around, puzzled as I tried to figure out where the voice was coming from, but couldn't find anyone. Not a single soul.
"Wake up, love."
I didn't know why but the voice felt like home. Dropping my helmet into the sand, I walked towards the voice and didn't look back.
All of a sudden, I bolted up right as I woke up from my vivid dream. Part of me expected to see that I was still back on the beach, dressed in an army uniform. But I breathed a sigh of relief when I saw that I was in the Hufflepuff common room and dressed in uniform that I had changed into when we got back from Hogsmeade so I was ready for prefect duty that Cedric and me had later.
"Elsa are you all right?" Cedric asked me in a worried tone.
"Um, yeah. Strange dream, that's all. How long was I asleep for?" I asked, running a shaky hand through my hair.
"Twenty minutes," Cedric told me. "What was the dream about, you seem freaked out."
"I was a medic in World War 2 and...and I was serving in Dad's squadron but, he wasn't my dad. Ron got hurt and Harry begged me to save him but, but I couldn't," I said looking down at my hands, half expecting them to be covered in Ron's blood and trying to remember the rest of the dream. "I think it was Verdandi, one of the Nornir. She wanted to tell me something."
"What was it?" Cedric asked hesitantly and I couldn't blame him. The last time that I had a Nornir induced dream, it was to warn me of his death.
"That a war is coming," I said. "But she also told me that we are stronger together, that we will be fine if we all stay together."
"Then I think we should take her advice and make sure that all of us support each other," Cedric said as he wrapped his arms around me. "Because she's right, we are stronger together."