Moving wasn't exactly the easiest thing to explain or do while trying to Reacclimatize a 5 year old to a new life style. She was very confused as to why we were moving and it was hard to explain to her in the first place. It helped to tell her she would be closer to her mom and Peter, but I felt bad having to do this when she needed time to process everything. The last thing she needed was more things to deal with.
I hoped I was at least being the best replacement care giver that I could be. I knew this choice was what would be best for us as a family in the long run, but I couldn't expect her to understand that much. Peter met us at the tower and watched over Morgan here while we got everything into the apartment.
I felt weird walking through the doors of my old place. It felt like ages since I had been here. The version myself that lived here was so far away yet this was all so familiar. I set the box I was carrying down onto the kitchen counter and I just stood there looking at these walls almost remembering everything that happened almost 6 years ago now. I wasn't much help with carrying the big boxes because my wrist had been broken three nights ago by Bucky during his sleep paralysis.
"You alright?" Bucky asked carrying in a few boxes and setting them down.
"Yeah." I said in a small voice as I looked at the room rather than him.
"Val." I heard and his hand was turning me around.
"Im fine." I said softly.
While I wasn't exactly sure if I was fine I was just more so visiting an old memory. With that, came a lot of feelings that were almost overwhelming. It wasn't exactly a bad thing it was just sort of zoning me out and away from the current moment.
"You going to be alright here?" He asked me looking down.
"Yeah, will you?" I asked him wrapping my arms around him.
"Yeah, soon hopefully." He said looking into my eyes. "For the love."
He looked past me and I saw his expression changes and he looked very pissed off. I turned around and saw Peter and Morgan outside of the apartment. My heart dropping only thinking about high up we were right now. I trusted Peter, but it still made my instincts to keep her safe explode. She waved and I could here her muffled giggles through the glass.
She was smiling big from ear to ear as he hair blew in the wind outside. Peter shot a web from his hand and they went swinging off in another direction. I heard Bucky huff and I just kissed his cheek. He looked at me and I felt his hand grabbed the back of my neck and he kissed me a little harder.
"I'm sorry we have to do this." He said as he pulled back from my lips.
"We get to bring Morgan closer to her family while we figure all of this out. Maybe being here will help her, we'll manage." I said softly as my hand pet the back of his head.
"Y'all have too much crap." Sam said and we both turned around to see him coming in and setting one of our boxes down.
"Sam." I said with a smile because it was nice to see him again.
"I got word from Happy you guys were staying here now." He said standing up straight. "I thought you two had a nice set up down at the lake."
"We did, we just needed to come back." Bucky said clearly struggling to think about what to say.
"What's going on?" He asked crossing his arms.
"It's nothing really." He said shaking his head.
"It doesn't seem like nothing." Sam said not sounding convinced.
"I think you guys have some catching up to do. I'll go grab some more boxes." I said leaving Bucky and Sam alone in the apartment.
They had a weird, but close relationship. I knew neither of them were one to have deep talks, but I didn't think my presence was going to make that any easier. Bucky in general was not good with expressing his emotions with words.
Even when Steve had left, Bucky never really talked about it much. I saw him fiddling with a little notepad often that belong to Steve, but he never seemed to want to talk about it when I would ask. I never wanted to push, but I'm sure if he was getting help they'd get to him, eventually. He started tomorrow and I could tell he wasn't exactly excited. Though I didn't blame him. Therapy often had to make things worse before things could get better.
I exhaled and made my way down to the bottom floor where the moving truck had been. I didn't exactly want to be moving boxes right now but if I wanted to make this place feel like home again I needed to unpack. I rested my head against the glass and braced myself for a long day.
•
I sat on the couch in Pepper's small room. She was in a hospital room next to the larger lab. Mindy had spent most hours of her day in here now that things had calmed down. Of course with Tony gone the company fell to Pepper, but with Pepper gone everything was left in a weird balance. Happy had been trying to straighten things out, but I just don't think Tony had even considered him and Pepper going at the same time.
Even if she did come back and lived, there was likely no way she'd be okay to run the company. Helen and I had talked earlier and she was sure there was no way she'd live without problems. I knew it wasn't even in question for the moment, but I had no idea what would happen if there ever was a point where there was nothing left we would do or try. That decision hung over my head and I had no idea who it would be up to.
I exhaled and took a sip of my coffee as I sat there much past my own bed time. I had gotten Morgan down and said goodbye to Bucky shortly after. Bruce had come to the Stark Tower to help Bucky, but I decided to stay away. I knew he wouldn't hold any grudges against me, but I didn't want to have to look at him and feel the guilt I know I'd feel. He loved her in a way I knew only made it hurt worse when he lost her. I heard a creak across the room and to my surprise Happy and Morgan stood there.
"Morgan? What's going on? I thought you were in bed." I said getting to my feet.
"I had a bad dream and no one was there." She said sadly.
"Alright Morgan let's go back to bed, it's late." I said placing my hand on her shoulder.
"Is that my mommy?" She asked.
My eyes shot around and Pepper was still laying there. I exhaled and looked back down to her and I nodded. She stepped forward and walked into the room. I looked to Happy who realized it probably wasn't best to let her just run into this room. I gave him a nod and he returned it before walking back down the halls.
I turned back to see Morgan standing on her tip toes at the side of her bed. I walked closer and I could see her curiosity as she looked at her mother. I was thankful Pepper at least looked healthy because I would hate for Morgan to see her looking rough. Morgan looked at me and I gave a soft smiled to her.
"Is she sleeping?" She asked innocently.
"Sort of." I said nodding.
"Why don't we just wake her up?" She asked me.
"I wish we could, but she needs sleep. She hit her head when she was fighting and that made her need to get a lot of sleep. I sort of hard to explain." I said sitting in the edge of the bed looking to her.
"What do you think she's dreaming about?" She asked crawling up into my lap.
"I don't know, maybe ice cream." I said and she giggled.
"When is she going to wake up?" She asked me softly.
"I don't know Morgan. She will eventually, but we just have to stay strong until she does." I said hoping I wasn't making a promise I couldn't keep.
"I miss her." She said laying against my chest.
"I do too." I said hugging her tightly.
"Does she know about my daddy?" She asked and I had to think for a moment.
"I don't think so." I said emptily realizing there was another people who I was going to have to let down. "But you know what? She's going to be so happy to see you when she does wake up. You can tell her about all of the fun stuff you and Peter do. I think she'd love hearing about the makeovers you give Bucky."
"She would think it's so funny." Morgan said giggling.
"She definitely would." I said smiling. "So why are you up so late?"
"I had a bad dream." She said softly.
"About what?" I asked.
"Bad guys." She said looking down at the doll she held in her hands.
"You don't need to have any dreams about bad guys, don't you forget who your daddy was? He beat every bad he ever fought against." I said trying to brighten her up.
"What about now?" She asked.
"Well your dad took care of them all. Even if there's another bad guy, there's a lot of us to take care of it." I said smiling.
"Like you and uncle Bucky?" She asked and I just nodded.
"Don't forget about uncle Peter too. As long as we're all around you never need to worry about bad guys." I assured her.
"When can I be a superhero like you guys?" She asked and I shook my head at how pure she truly was.
"Hopefully never." I said and she rolled her eyes.
"I want to be a superhero when I get older." She said adamantly.
"We'll talk about it when you get older." I said lifting her up and carrying her. "As for now I think it's time to go to bed, it is very late."
"Can I sleep with you and uncle Bucky?" She asked.
"Bucky won't be home at nighttime for a while, but you can come stay with me in our bed." I said looking to her as we walked out of the room.
"Why isn't he home?" She asked as I pressed the buttons the elevator just outside Pepper's room.
"He has bad nightmares at nighttime so he's having a friend of ours help him." I said trying to phrase it to where she would understand it.
"Does he have nightmares like me?" She asked as the elevator doors opened.
"Kind of but his are very bad and very scary." I said as she nestled up to my side.
"He needs to get a doll like me." She said and I smiled down at her but realized she didn't have the doll.
"Did you forget your doll in the room?" I asked because she had just had it with her a few moments ago. It was rare I saw her with out it most days.
"No I gave it to mommy, she needs it." She said softly.
"What for?" I asked.
"Incase she has a nightmare and wakes up." She said softly.
"Well that's a very sweet idea, but what are you going to do if you have a nightmare?" I asked her.
"I have you and uncle Bucky to protect me." She said giving me a soft hug as she let out a big yawn.
I didn't know how to respond to that other than a smile. She truly was the sweetest kid I knew. Tony loved her to absolute bits and pieces and I knew I would love her just the same. We went down the elevator and before I could even step out of the elevator she was fast asleep in my arms.