a/n:
Hello everyone!!
I'd just like to start off by apologizing for the last few chapters. Normally I'm very patient with my writing and won't publish anything until I'm completely happy with it, but that hasn't been the case with last couple of chapters. They were decently written, but definitely not my best work. I felt sort of pressured to post as often as I could. I WAS NOT PRESSURED BY ANY OF YOU GUYS SO DO NOT FEEL BAD IT WAS NOT YOUR FAULT!!!!! I think it was because that this was such a dramatic time in the story and I didn't want to leave any of you guessing for too long, so I published chapters just to give myself a little bit of closure.
I'm not happy with the last few chapters and may rewrite bits of it, but I swear that from this point on my writing will be much better and back to my high standards.
Thank you all for reading and voting and etc. It makes me happy knowing I have so many loyal readers that always vote and comment.
Oh also:
Zia is pretty much based on me, so the whole thing about her hating eye contact, is all me.
I cannot stand eye contact. Even if it's just like a quick glance, I hate it. I hate the way it makes me feel, I hate how confusing it is, I hate how many ways people can take it.
And because my friends now read this story, they have come to the realization that I do not like eye contact.
And now, almost every chance they get, they try and make eye contact with me.
And I want to shrivel into a ball and die.
Anyways, enjoy!!!!
•••
zia
JJ and I sat next to each other on the boat ride back. I guess Teeny had snuck some of dads cash into her backpack so we had enough to pay the fare.
I lean my head on JJs shoulder as the ferry pulls away from the dock, starting the journey to bring us back home. The two of us sit in the front row, no one blocking us from the beautiful view that was the morning sun shining brightly on the ocean water.
John B and Sarah sat beside us, Sarah being completely asleep on John Bs shoulder. Kie and Pope sat behind us, along with Teeny. Apparently Pope and her had sparked a conversation about Harry Potter.
Fun fact: Pope is a Ravenclaw.
The kind feeling of JJs skin against mine was one I could never get bored of.
I look up to see a waiter walking by with a tray full of some type of finger food. With a quick motion, JJ ducks down, hiding his face in the nape of my neck.
"Oh shit." He mutters.
I try not to laugh. "What are you doing?" I whisper, a faint smile on my face.
"See that guy over there." He carefully and barely nods his head in the direction of the waiter.
"Yes?" I say.
"I had a small run in with him when sneaking on the boat earlier. Is he gone yet?" He whispers, his hot breath sending goosebumps over my skin.
I watch as the waiter turns the corner to head to the bottom floor of the ferry, careful to not drop the tray full of food.
"Yeah, he's gone. Now move." I lightly shrug my shoulder, causing his head to lift up carefully.
He grins. "I don't know, I kind of like it here."
I laugh and he eventually removes his head.
And then it dawned on me.
"Wait. You- you snuck into a boat?" I question, furrowing my brows in confusion. I look away from the water and back at him. JJ looks down at me with the same blue eyes as they used to be.
They were no longer full of anger or hatred or guilt or whatever it was that made me so afraid he'd never be himself around me again.
"Yeah. We didn't have enough money for all of us to get on, so I had to improvise." He shrugs as if it was no big deal.
"You snuck onto a boat for me?" I question again.
He lets out a laugh. "Does that surprise you?" He smiles.
Holy shit.
Maybe my life really is a Netflix special.
I smile and slowly shake my head. "Not really." I look away from him, my eyes settling on the horizon.
Memories begin flooding in again, just ones that were much more recent. Like the night of the drive-in. Or Midsummers. Or the morning after Midsummers.
I never even told him how I felt about that night. All he knows is that it meant something to me, considering that that was the only statement I could choke up with I was in tears and desperate to get out of that car and into my house.
"Listen, JJ. About that night, I meant what I said. It did mean something. And I'm so sorry if you thought I didn't care about it, or about you, or anything-" I begin to ramble in an attempt to explain myself to him before he cuts me off.
"Z, stop apologizing." He says, my nickname rolling off his tongue, his voice deep but gentle. He cups my cheek with his hand, and I feel every single cut, blister, and callus that he has. But I also feel the warmth. The kind, soothing, calming tranquility that is sent throughout my body once his skin comes in contact with mine.
"I just- I didn't mean to hurt you. And I feel like, in some way, I did." I begin. "Listen, if we don't work out then we don't work out, but I couldn't live with myself knowing that I caused you any pain." I look down at my lap, refusing to look anywhere else.
But against my efforts, JJ lightly lifts my head, causing my eyes to come in contact with his. And for a split second, his eyes glance down at my lips, and then back up again.
"You didn't hurt me. I never should've told you to go back. You weren't even gone for a full twenty-four hours and yet it was the worst night of my life. I didn't think you'd really have that much of an effect on me, but I guess when you love someone you can't live without them. Not even for a night." He says, smiling and glancing down at my lips once more.
My eyes slightly widen, not knowing if I should be shocked or flattered at his words. I open my mouth to speak, but no words come out.
"I love you, Z."
I never understood why those words meant so much to people. I mean, separately they're just regular everyday vocabulary. And even when they're put together they sometimes don't mean much. It just depends on who's saying it.
Teeny says "I love you" to me. So does Macy. It doesn't feel weird, or unearthly.
But when he says it.
I don't know.
My heart just stops. There's no way to control my reaction to it. I'm so confused as to whether or not he's expecting me to say it back that I don't even realize that I somehow forgot how to breath.
I take a deep inhale.
"I love you, JJ Maybank." I exhale.
And within mere seconds, his lips are on mine and his scent once again overwhelms my senses.
•••
John B had plans to go fishing with Ward, so we dropped him off at Tannyhill. Kie, Pope, and JJ went back to the Château to wait for him to get back. I however, had to see Macy.
I open the front door of my real home quietly, Teeny standing behind me.
But no matter how quietly I open it, Jasper always knows when someone's here.
The multicolored dog comes rounding the corner, ears flopping and tongue sticking out, his paws taking him faster than they ever had before.
"Jasper!" I shout as I immediately drop my bag and get on my knees, allowing him to jump right into my arms. He licks all over my face even though I try my best to get away from the slobber.
He climbs down and runs to Teeny, repeating the process of jumping.
Teeny looks afraid at first, almost as if she needs permission to go near him.
"You can pet him, he's friendly." I smile. Her face lights up as she drops down, scratching him behind the ears.
The scene warms my heart.
"Zia?" I hear a faint whisper from behind me.
I turn around, only to see the one and only Macy standing right in front of me. An overwhelming sense of guilt rifles through my body as she throws her arms over my shoulders, holding me in the tightest, warmest hug I've ever had.
"Zia!" She says happily, a light sob escaping her lips.
"Macy." I say as I wrap my arms around her torso.
"Don't you ever scare me like that again." She whispers.
"I won't. I promise." I whisper back.
She pulls away, eyes watering with joyful tears, the biggest smile I've ever seen.
Her eyes wander past me and onto Teeny.
"Oh, is this-" She looks at me again, and I nod.
"Teeny." I say, and her eyes shoot up, immediately locking onto Macy.
"This is Macy." I say with a smile.
She stands up and holds out her hand.
"You must be Pristine. I've heard so much about you." Macy smiles, taking Teenys hand and shaking it.
"Yeah, that's me. But, please, call me Teeny." She smiles.
•••
After a few hours of sharing stories I've heard already, or actually lived through, I got a message from the group saying that John B was going to be back soon and I had to get to the Château.
I guess Sarah and Teeny had made plans while on the ferry for her and Wheezy to hang out, so I had to drop her off at Tannyhill.
As soon as I arrived back at the Château I saw everything. The Christmas lights, the disco ball, the floatie drink holders, the hot tub. The blond sitting inside of the empty hot tub.
Kie was sitting inside of some type of pulley machine that sat high above us and Pope was controlling it from the ground.
"Okay, I'm bringing you down." He says, moving the rope to allow her back down.
"Hey, guys!" I say as I get out of Macy's car, closing the door behind me.
"Hey, Zia!" Pope waves and Kie smiles at my attendance.
I look around in an attempt to find John B, but all I see are Christmas lights.
"Where's John B?" I ask, walking over to the hot tob that JJ was sitting in.
"He's pulling a Houdini." JJ jokes.
"I got my scholarship interview tomorrow, we've gotta get this done." Pope exclaims.
With everything that's been going on, I completely forgot about the scholarship.
Snapping me out of my thoughts, I see John B walking down the driveway, into the backyard. But he doesn't look normal. He's angry. Really angry.
"Speak of the devil." JJ says as he gets out of the hot tub.
"Dude, I set up the entire winch to pull up the gold and everything." JJ lies.
"No, no he did not. I did that." Pope corrects him, but John B has no response nor reaction.
"Hey," Kie starts, but before she could get anything else out, John B was storming into the Château.
"Okay, that's it?!" JJ yells, making sure he can hear.
I get a quick glance of John B as he rushes inside. His eyes were wide but empty of emotion. They were just blank.
What could've happened on that boat?
We all exchange confused glances.
"What was all that about?" I ask, walking towards the house.
"I was about to ask you the same question." JJ says, catching up with me and throwing the door open.
John B is rifling through the pillows. Opening and closing cabinets with force. He runs over to the pullout mattress.
"Hey man, what's up? What's going on?" Pope asks him.
He ignores him.
"What are you looking for?" Kie asks, voice much more stern now.
John B lifts up the mattress, revealing JJs gun hidden underneath. John B grabs it aggressively and turns to leave.
"Hey, what do you need the gun for?" JJ shouts, stepping in front of him.
John B tried to shove past him.
"Talk to us!" JJ yells again, but this time John B shoved him back, causing him to fall on the mattress.
I've never seen John B get like this.
I don't like it.
"What, are you JJ now?" Pope questions as him and Kie follow John B out the door.
"Shit, are you okay?" I ask, leaning down and helping JJ up.
"Yeah, yeah I'm fine. Come on." We rush out the door to see John B on JJs dirt bike, ready to leave.
"John B, what the hell?" I shout.
"What are you doing, man?" JJ says.
"Ward knows about the gold!" John B yells, keeping his eyes in front of him.
A breath hitches in my throat.
John B turns his head back at us, eyes now filled with tears.
"He killed my dad." And with those last words, John B pulled out of the driveway full speed, leaving a trail of dust behind him.
Shit.
•••
Heyyyyyy
Fun fact about me 😜 I got the Madison Beer setting spray??? Very excited about that tbh
And I'm kind of in love with the new single she just put out
And to answer that question, yes I've cried to it already 😁👍