Benji
I shove Natalie off of me as soon as I understand what's happening. My brain is slow right now, and so is my reaction time.
"What the hell?" I say, half drunk and confused, and half angry.
"Dont be lame, Benji," Natalie says. "Just go with it."
I drunkenly take off to search for Brandy and realize she must have already left. "Fuck," I mutter. I sloppily take out my cellphone and attempt to dial her number.
The phone rings and I wait for an answer. When the connection goes through, I'm so excited. "B, where are you? I'm sorry. I'm sorry. Talk to me, baby."
"Benji?" A voice says, only it isn't Brandy.
"Who is this?" I slur.
"Hellen," she says. "Why the hell are you calling me? Are you drunk?"
"Wait what?" I zone out.
"Of course you are." She chuckles. "Is Brandy not with you?"
"No, no, no. She's not here. I can't find her. I fucked up, I seriously fucked up," I say.
"I'm not surprised," she says. "Where are you? I'll pick you up."
"You will?" I know I sound surprised.
"Unfortunately, yes," she answers me. "Now where the hell are you?"
***
Twenty minutes later, I see a cab parked in front of me outside with Hellen inside of it. She rolls down the window. "Get in," she orders.
I trip over on the way to the cab and squeeze in beside her. A part of me doesn't know if I'm drunk of if Hellen is really picking me up from a party.
"Why are you helping me?" I ask her when the car starts to move.
"Because." She shrugs. "I care about Brandy. And she would never be okay with you drunk calling me and knowing I didn't help you."
"I'll pay for the cab," I insist. "Let me." I pull out my wallet and hand it to her.
"You don't have to offer. Of course you're paying—you're an eighteen year old millionaire." She laughs.
"Where are we dropping you off?" She asks.
"Uh..." I trail off. "My apartment, I guess."
Hellen gives the driver the address and I lean back in the seat and look out the window.
"What do you mean you fucked up?" She asks. "Oh, God. What did you do?"
"I didn't do anything, really," I say. "Someone kissed me," I sigh. "And I think Brandy saw us. Everyone did. Natalie kissed me in front of fucking everyone."
"I fucking knew that Natalie girl would cause nothing but problems." She gloats. "Didn't I say that?" She chuckles. "And Brandy saw?"
I nod. "I think so."
"How many times?" She asks. "How many times are you going to hurt her before you leave her alone?"
"I'm not trying to..." I tell her. "I never wanted to hurt her. I didn't ask Natalie to kiss me. She just did it."
"Did you pull away?"
I sigh. "Eventually."
She scoffs. "Eventually? You're an idiot, Benji. Did you know that? You're a literal idiot."
"Of course I know that," I agree. "I just hope I didn't ruin everything for good. I really love her, Hellen. I know, I know—you hate my guts—but I still love her. She's... she's the one."
"You really love her or are you just drunk?" She scoffs.
"I really love her," I say. "I... I thought I was doing everything right. I asked her out, I took her on an amazing date and we had a great time. I don't know what changed... or how it changed so fast."
"You can't take her out once and expect everything to be perfect. I know you've never been in a real relationship before, but you're dumb as fuck." She lectures me. "You gotta keep it consistent. One good date can't save your shitty relationship."
I sigh. "You're right. I have no idea what I'm doing. Maybe I shouldn't even be with her. All I'm doing is causing damage."
"Maybe." She shrugs. "But I'll tell you this: that girl loves you. Personally, I don't know what she sees in you, but if she still loves you after all the shit you've pulled, she's a real one. It may make her dumb, but damn is she loyal. Don't lose her."
"Thanks, Hellen," I say. "You're... pretty chill."
"Duh."
When I get to the apartment building I manage to make it to my apartment and even unlock the door. I call out Brandy's name and hope for an answer from her.
I fall onto my bed, and try to force myself to get up. If I fall asleep, I won't be able to talk to her tonight. I need to try calling her again. I need to...
Eight hours later...
I slept through the night. I hardly remember my last thought before I passed out. I make my way to the bathroom to take a quick shower, to rinse off last night.
Afterwards, I scan the apartment for Brandy. Her door is wide open which means she is already gone or she didn't come home at all last night.
I call her four times but she doesn't pick up. I realize that in order to find her, there's really only one other choice: Hellen.
The phone rings for a couple of seconds before she picks up. "Ah, if it isn't the infamous Benji. What do you want?"
"Hellen? Hey," I say. "I need a favour."
"Didn't I already do you one?" She laughs. "Or was dragging your ass back to your apartment at midnight all in my dream?"
"True, but I didn't ask you to do that," I remind her. "But... I'm asking you to do this."
"I'm not saying yes," she says. "But let's hear it. I could use a some entertainment—things have been a bit boring lately."
"Have you talked to Brandy? Do you know where she is?" I ask desperately.
"No," she says. "We aren't speaking right now. Or I'm not speaking to her. Truthfully, I don't know what the fuck is going on between us."
"Yeah, what's up with that? Brandy has been calling you for days and she says you've been ignoring her?" I pry. "
She sighs. "Mind your business, dude. That's between Brandy and me."
"Fine," I say. "But she's desperate—she wants to talk to you more than anything. So... this is where my favour comes in."
"You want me to call her?" She chuckles. "No, no. I told you I'm not speaking to her."
"C'mon, don't be stubborn. Brandy has been the best damn friend to you since you two met. Lighten up, will you?"
"Let's say I did decide to give her a call. What do you want me to say? Ask where she is? It's so random—she'll think I want to meet up with her."
"Just do it," I say. "Please."
She sighs. "Fine." She hangs up.
Brandy's POV:
I spent the night at Dad's place. I couldn't bear the thought of staying in the same apartment as Benji. Just thinking about his lips on Natalie's is enough to make me sick.
Dad made his famous French toast and we decided to sit together at our tiny table, just like old times. I like my new apartment but nothing beats the nostalgia of being back at home with Dad.
"You seem... quiet. More quiet than usual, Brand. Everything okay?" Dad asks.
I sigh. "No," I answer honestly. "Things aren't easy, Dad. I thought-" I pause. "I thought... moving into Benji's apartment would be easy, but it isn't. It seemed so perfect too, you know? It's a ten minute walk from my dream school, and I'm living with my best friend. But moving in? It's... it's ruined everything." I cry.
"Brand..." he frowns as he grabs my hand from across the table. "What happened? Did her hurt you?"
"No," my voice breaks. "Someone else did. A girl." I admit.
"A... a girl?" He says. "What did she do?"
"It's hard to explain," I tell him. "It's—it's stupid. I'm stupid."
"You are many things, Brand, but stupid is not one of them. If someone hurt you, you have a right to feel sad or even angry. Your feelings are valid, honey."
"I know," I say. "I don't know how to explain it, Dad. Nothing makes sense anymore. I just thought college would be easier than high school."
"Honey." He laughs. "The whole world is one big high school. It doesn't get easier—necessarily. You just... you learn how to adjust. That's just life. There are always going to be people who hurt you. What's important is how you react to it. Just because they hurt you it doesn't mean you have to hurt them back."
I chuckle. "I've missed your wisdom, Dad. You always know what to say."
"Then come back home, Brand." He suggests. "I've missed you, too. Come back and live here. Who needs Benji? So what if you have to transit a bit to school? You've done that for years already, haven't you?"
I shrug. "I don't think I'm ready to give up yet. I think having some independence has been healthy for me. It's been hard but it's also been rewarding. I—I like living with him, Dad. He's difficult and confusing but he's... he's like, a heart on my sleeve. I can't just leave, Dad. Not yet." I explain.
"Just tell me the truth, Brand. Do you like him? Are you two... dating?" He asks.
"I thought we were." I finally admit. "I thought we had something good, something real. But he has too much baggage—too much shit going on in his life that he has too deal with."
I further explain my feelings to Dad until our talk is interrupted by the sound of my phone ringing. I wouldn't answer it if it was anyone but Hellen. My eyes pop when I see her name on the screen. I haven't heard from her since I saw her on my first date with Benji. I can't believe she's really calling me back. It's like those feelings and fears I had about her abandoning me just completely disappeared.
"Hellen?" I say excitedly through the phone. "Hey."
"Hey," she says boringly. "Can we talk?"
I stand up and head to my room, mouthing I'm sorry to my dad as I close the door. "Yes, yes. Please, let's talk. How are you?"
"Where are you right now?" She asks randomly.
"D-do you wan to meet up?"
"Are you at the park?" She guesses.
"No," I say. "I'm at my dad's place. Why?"
"I'm just making sure you're okay," she tells me. "I... I heard you had a shitty night last night."
I pause. "Who told you that?"
"It doesn't matter. I'm just making sure you're okay. Now that I know that you are, I'm going to hang up. See ya."
"Wait!" I beg. "Talk to me, Hel. I-I miss you. We haven't spoken in so long. I'm starting to think you're avoiding me—which it really looks like you are."
She sighs deeply. "I'm not avoiding you... exactly. I just need some time away from you."
"But why? What did I do? Can't you at least tell me that? You're killing me here, Hel."
"Well, I'm sorry I'm hurting your feelings," she says. "Look. I've got to go. We'll talk. Eventually. Bye."
"Wait, Hellen-" I start to say before she hangs up. I scoff when the line cuts off and I lay down in my bed.
I know Hellen doesn't know exactly what's going on in my life, but I wish she understood how lonely I've been feeling—especially right now. Life has been nothing but loses recently, despite my perfect first date with Benji and my new internship at Mr. Cruz's office.
I cry on my bed for a solid twenty minutes because I have a desperate need to let it all out. I'm pretty good at bottling up my feelings, but things have been too much for me lately.
I hear a knock at my door and I instantly wipe my tears from my eyes and sit up straight. I fix my hair and take a deep breath before speaking. I don't want to talk to Dad about Hellen—which is why I'm crying. He loves Hellen and he would die a bit inside if he knew we weren't on good terms... for whatever reason. I still don't know why she needs space for me. I thought she cared about me.
"Come in," I attempt to say normally.
I expect to see Dad but instead, I'm caught off guard when I see Benji at my bedroom door. I gasp quietly and shut my eyes. "Benji," I mutter.
"We need to talk," he says, walking closer to me.
I nod. "Yeah," I say. "We do."
—
Author's Note:
Thank you for reading this chapter! Just knowing people actually read and/or enjoy this story even just a bit makes me so happy. Please support my story by voting—your love means everything <3
I think I've finally decided where this story is going and how it's going to end, even though that won't be in many, many chapters from now. :)
Lots of love,
Beth.